Mwynwen - The Camel Corps rides again
By Diana the Valkyrie
I changed into my netball gear, and we went down at the sports field


Fluff was getting beat up by some great bully! I launched myself into action,
flew past her like a falcon stooping on a pigeon, and slammed into the bully
like a tigress pouncing on a goat. The impact sent both of us to the ground,
and we rolled over and over in a furball of fury. But before long, I was
astride my opponent, who was face down to the floor, with one of my hands
twined in her hair and the other slapping her head back and forth. Of course,
I used my natural advantages of height, reach and gravy. As soon as our
rolling around had me on top, I pinned her down with high gravy, and she was
pretty much helpless. Whack. "Do you give up?" Whack. "Give up now" Whack.
After she tried vainly to unstick herself from under me, the smacks I was
landing on her head and shoulders finally convinced her to yield. "OK, OK, you
win, let me up."

Oh no, I thought. It's not that simple. This is a pecking order thing, and I'm
on top. "You have to promise to fag for me." "NO WAY, BITCH!" Whack whack
whack. Lying on her face, pinned down by a weight as great as four of me, she
couldn't fight back. It was only a matter of time. Whack. Whack. "Yes, yes,
I'll fag for you." "Promise?" "Yes." "Cross your heart and hope to die?"
"Yes." "Say it then." "Cross my heart and hope to die, I'll fag for you."

I got off her, and let her get up. She brushed the hair out of her eyes. "Wow.
Where did you learn to fight like that?" "Last school Fluff and I were are,
the nuns had classes in boxing, wrestling and catfighting" "Fluff?" "That's
her nickname" "And she's the Witch" said Fluff. "Hi, I'm Bunty" and we shook
hands. "No hard feelings?" "No. Now turn down my bed, and unpack my undies,
there's a good girl."

While she did that, I asked her about the others. "There's Princess Pudge,
she's a sweetie, and there's Licks. Licks is dead popular with the boys." "I
can imagine" I replied, "but Fluff has some pretty neat tricks too." Fluff
grinned, and rubbed her fingers together suggestively.

Then Licks and the Princess arrived; one short dumpy pudding and one tall
blonde vision of loveliness. I hate blonde visions of loveliness, I guess
everyone does. Except boys, of course. "You must be the Princess May" I said
to the vision of loveliness. "Yeh, that's me" replied the pudding.

I always thought there was some sort of rule that said that princesses are
beautiful. But there's plenty of precedent for Ugly Sisters, and although it
would be cruel to call this princess ugly, it would not be entirely
inaccurate. To call her "plain" would be considerable flattery. But I suppose
if you're a princess, it doesn't really matter what you look like. "Hi, I'm
Alexandria" said the tall blonde. "Ah," said Linda, "that's why you're called
Licks?" "Sure, what did you think?" "They call me Fluff" "Why?" "It isn't
because my name is Fluffandria. Or because I'm fluffy."

"So is that it for the Upper Sixth, five of us?" "Yeah, plus Cherry, plus the
four boys." I could see Fluff doing the arithmetic in her head and coming up
two short, then I saw her glancing at Princess, and she smiled. No competition
there. I wasn't too worried about Bunty, she was a big girl and had a
jolly-hockeys-sticks kind of glow to her, but she didn't look like she'd be
real competition. No, it was Licks that I saw as the main oppo. And maybe this
Cherry. I had a few inches on Licks, but everyone knows that gentlemen prefer
blondes.

"So what about the boys?" I asked. Bunty counted off on her fingers. "There's
Billy and Ben, Nose and the Flash." "Nose?" "Because he knows it all. Plus
he's a drip" "Flash?" "Harry Flashman, Flash Harry, the Flash." "We met Bill
and Ben, there was a guy with them, he said he was doing Computer Science"
"That's the Nose, he's Cherry's boyfriend, and she's welcome to him, he's a
weed." "Unlike Bill and Ben" said Fluff.

That night, as we all bedded down, and after the bell had rung for "Lights
out", Fluff whispered across to me. "Witch?" "Mmm?" "Can I ...?" "No"
"Please?" "No!" "Fluffy please?" "Oh, all right then. Come on." A few seconds
later, she joined me in bed. "It hasn't changed, has it?" "No." "Just like
when we were ..." "Yes"

"Witch?" she whispered into my ear. "Yes, Fluff." "I'm scared." "Scared? Why?"
"I don't know. I just feel ... I don't know. I have a bad feeling about this."
"Fluff, if you want to leave, you can." "I know." "So?" "I'm not leaving you
on your own, Witch." I reached out a hand, she grabbed it in both of hers.
"The old team, Fluff and the Witch" "The Camel and the Llama" "Yeah" "Fluff,
someone wants to kill that girl." "Yeah. Why is that our problem?" "You know
why." "Yeah." "Yeah." "Mmm."

When the bell woke me up next morning, Fluff was back in her own bed. I tried
to turn over and get back to sleep, but a big red-headed girl was shaking me
awake. "Hey, new bug. Rise and shine. I opened the other eye. "And you are?"
"Hi, I'm Cherry, Cherry Robert. You play cricket?" I sat up in bed. "Uh, no,
not really." "Hockey?" "Not if I can help it." I stood up and stretched.
"Netball's my game. Or Volleyball." "Wow, you are one seriously high lady!"
she said. I looked down at her from my six foot three. "You wait till you see
me jump." "We don't call it Netball any more, we call it Basketball, the boys
think Netball's for wimps." "Not the way I play, it isn't." "Well, we need a
good shooter for the team, and a spiker for the Volleyball, can you spike?"
"Honey, I can get on top of any ball that comes over the net and spike like
it's fired from a gun." "Smashing" said Cherry. "We're doing tryouts today,
please say you'll come." I grinned. "And what about your friend?" Fluff came
over and sat on my bed. "I'm not really built for speed," she said, "or for
power." "How about boxing?" asked Cherry. "You do boxing now?" I asked.
"Sure," said Cherry. "Always did, and when they made this a mixed school, they
just didn't change it. You box, Fluff?" "I'm more a lover than a fighter,
Cherry" she replied. In spades, I thought, or possibly in hearts. She's only
the number one star of the British porn industry, except that you don't see
her, you just see her work. "I can cheer, though" she offered.

After breakfast, Cherry took me down to the gym so I could try out for the
netball team, while Fluff went off with the boys. We did a bit of one-on-one;
first she defended while I attacked, and I showed her my netball moves. The
thing here was to make it look possible. No flying around the pitch, just
jumping a few inches more than ought to be possible, peaking a second longer.
And, more subtly, getting a bit of lateral gravy to help the swerves and
dodges. Cherry had to rely on the friction between her boots and the ground to
change direction; I could just pull sideways. "How do you jump so high?" she
asked. "Good legs" I lied. Well, I do have good legs, men always tell me so.
It's a lie because although that's totally true, telling her that in the
context of a question about how I jumped so high, is done with the intent to
deceive, and that makes it a lie. It's not that I can't tell lies, although I
don't like doing it. The thing is, whereas other people are capable of lying
to themselves, that's something I've never got the trick of. I know when I'm
lying.

So then she did the attacking while I defended, and at the end of it she said
"Well, there must be something about you that makes me clumsy, that's all I
can say, there's no way I should have missed all those." "Wavy gravy", I
thought, "it doesn't take much to nudge a ball in flight." "Look, Mwynwen ..."
"Call me Min, or Witch" "Witch?" "Nickname" "But how did you get it?" "Oh, I
know a few spells and stuff" I replied, airily, "and it's as intimidating as
hell with the boys." She grinned, she knew how important it is to impress the
opposite sex. "Is Cherry a nickname or your real name?" "Nickname." "So what's
your real name?" She blushed. "Er." "Come on, spit it out." "You won't laugh?"
"I won't laugh." "Guide's honour?" I showed her my crossed fingers.
"Scheherezade." "You're kidding." "It's my brother Aladdin you should feel
sorry for. Bloody parents." "Bloody parents" I agreed.

"OK, look here Witch, I've been playing center forward in the team up till
now, but you're masses better than me. How about this - I'll stay as skipper,
but you'll be the striker." "No deal" I replied. Skipper sounds good, but it's
the high-jumping striker that everyone watches. Especially the boys. And
netball is my game, always has been. Even if you call it basketball. But the
striker is the natural leader of the team; no way would I settle for this
compromise. "Cherry, you know I'm a better striker than you." "Miles better."
"And for the good of the team, that's the position I should play." "No
argument, the team comes first." "And the striker calls the plays." "True."
"So I'm the skipper." Cherry thought about this, I could see that she knew I
made sense, but she'd obviously been the skipper for so long, she was
reluctant to give it up. "OK, Cherry, I tell you what. We'll have a boxing
match, winner is the skipper." She looked at me. I had several inches on her,
but I was long and lean, she was broad and looked tough. In a slugging match,
she'd beat me. But I wasn't suggesting a slugging match, this was going to be
a one-sided long-range missile dust-up, where she wouldn't get within six
inches of me and I punched her into the ground at long range. "Witch, you'd
make mincemeat of me, I wouldn't get close enough. But that's not why I'm
refusing this match." "Oh? Then why?" "Because either you ought to be skipper,
or else you oughtn't, and whoever wins a boxing match has no effect on the
logic of the situation. OK, you're skipper." "Oh, Cherry, you're a brick, an
absolute corker. And you shall be my Number Two." I ran towards her and
grabbed her in a hug, which she returned enthusiastically. So I hugged her
harder, and she hugged me back some more. One of my hands moved down to the
small of her back and scratched her a bit, one of hers crept between my
shoulder blades and rubbed. Then we moved apart, and stared at each other. I
was the first to speak. "After all that running around, I need a long hot
shower." "Me too", said Cherry.

While I'd been showing off my athletic prowess on the ball field, Fluff had
not been idle. Our objective was to bodyguard Princess Pudge, but we agreed
that if push came to shove, she was no more important than the other pupils at
Greyfriars. I mean, a kid's just as important if she's a dustman's daughter.
If the balloon went up, we didn't want to have to argue with people about what
to do. And the best way to control a school-full of possibly hysterical
children, was via the already-recognised authority figures. And that meant the
School Prefects, who were, of course, the Upper Sixth. So we wanted those
prefects to get used to doing what we told them, so that if the balloon went
up, we could move fast and not have to debate.

Of course, there are two kinds of prefects, boys and girls. The natural
division of labour between Fluff and I, was for her to use her fluffing skills
to dominate the boys, while I used my height, athletic ability and fighting
skills to lead the girls. I already had Bunty and Cherry nailed down, and in
the showers, Cherry told me that Billy and Ben were already used to licking
her toes on command, and that Nose was her boyfriend. "What about Flash
Harry?" I asked. "Bunty's got her eye on him, but nothing's happened yet." I
thought about Fluff in action. "I hope you weren't, uh, attached to Billy and
Ben?" "No, Nose is my guy, they're just for mucking about with. Princess
Pudding fancies Billy, though." "I can see why, birds of a feather." "So who
do you fancy, Witch?" "Well, you know what, Cherry? Boys aren't really my
thing." "Oh?" she said, rather breathlessly. "No, not really. I much prefer
men." "Oh." she said, sounding a bit disappointed. "Hacker sounds rather
dishy." I continued. "But he's, he's, he's one of the teachers." "So?" "Well,
that's, well, yucky. Isn't it?" I grinned as the dinner bell went. "Last one
to the refectory is a sissy" and we raced off.

Over dinner, I got Fluff to report progress to me. "Two down, two to go"
reported Fluff. I looked round, sure enough, Billy and Ben weren't visible.
"Sleeping it off," said Fluff, "Lawks-a-mussy, Witch, I'd forgotten that
eighteen-year-olds are just so juicy. Bucketfulls!" "Yes, well, try to leave
them capable of walking, Fluff." She grinned. "Yes, ma capitaine. How about
you?" I reported progress to her. "So we've pretty much got the girls sorted
out, Nose will follow Cherry, that just leaves Flash Harry." "I was planning
to handle him tonight", said Fluff, making her handling gesture. "OK, do that,
but don't stay up late and don't get caught in the boys dorm after lights
out."

Next day at breakfast, I was talking with Cherry about today's netball match,
the first of the season, a friendly against the boys. Fluff rolled up late,
looking pleased about something. I raised an eyebrow at her, and she winked. I
made the "gimme" gesture and she did a thumbs up. Evidently Flash Harry had
been dealt with.

I changed into my netball gear, and we went down at the sports field. Our team
consisted of myself, Cherry, Bunty, Licks and a girl from the Lower Sixth; the
boys fielded Harry, Ben, Nose and two Lower Sixth boys I hadn't seen before.
Billy was considered to be too hopeless for sports. Nose was pretty bad too,
but at least he didn't shake the ground whenever he jumped.

The game was totally uninteresting. After the first few minutes, it was clear
that the boys were only going to get the ball it we gave it to them, which we
did so that we could practice taking it back. Bunty's main objective seemed to
be to collide with the boys as often as she could; Licks chief concern was to
keep her hair in place. Fluff cheered from the sidelines, and I just floated
gracefully around the pitch popping in goals from time to time. Uh - I mean
baskets. I keep forgetting they changed the names.

Afterwards in the shower, I told Bunty that one of her fagly duties was to
soap me up, which she did quite enthusiastically. Cherry looked a bit wistful
about that, so I suggested that she get Licks to do her. "No way" she said.
"That stuck-up bitch?" "Meow" I said, making a clawing gesture. Licks glared
at me.

At lunch, I got a head-to-head with Fluff. "You seem to have Cherry on a
plate", she said. "How's about Flash Harry?" "He's asleep" she said, and
winked. "You won't have to worry about him." "What can we do about Licks?" She
shook her head. "Some you lose, we'll just assume she's going to be difficult.
Billy will do anything for a currant bun, Ben's a cutie, Nose is about as in
love with Cherry as a boy can be." "Cherry likes him, and lets him tag along
with her, but she is't what you'd call enamoured of him." "My god, Witch, I'd
forgotten what it was like to be a teenager. All these who-is-with-who lists,
all the gossip about who's keen on who. I thought I'd left all that behind me
yonks ago" "So did I, then I found out that the Sharon-Harry link wasn't as
dead as I'd been led to believe ..." Fluff had the grace to blush. "Sorry
about that, Witch. I really thought ..." "Yeah, ok. No major nose-break."