Ling and the Temple Raiders
by T. Prince, tk_prince@hotmail.se
Ling teaches four Western mercenary babes trying to raid a temple a lesson.


This story was requested by Joe.

Inside the shaft, it was dark as usual. Ling dug through her fanny pack, took
out her flashlight and flipped it on. In the harsh, phosphorescent light, she
could make out the spots where she had been digging, and the small pile of
shards that she had collected for preservation in a corner.

She sifted through the shards. Ancient blue and yellow porcelain, a vase frag-
ment depicting a broken dragon's tail, a piece of a stone frieze with spinels
and lapis lazuli in the shapes of peonies and hydrangea... The amount of lost
treasures in this temple was staggering! And yet, considering the recent trend
among rich foreigners to go "temple raiding", it was extremely important that
the existence of the long forgotten Buddhist temple remain secret -- at least
until Ling had excavated all of its treasures for safekeeping.

Ling was 23 years old, and a self-educated hobby archaeologist. She was a
lean, boyish girl with slight but becoming curves; a body more suited for
climbing or hanging from ropes than for any more feminine pursuits. She was
certainly cute -- high cheekbones, appealing eyes and a cheeky upturned nose
-- but she also wasn't the kind of girl who usually put much stock in her own
body image, preferring her peers to define her by her wits, knowledge and
willpower than the measure of her waist or breasts.

Inside the temple, she was wearing a black linen top and rolled-up khaki
shorts, and her black hair was in a long ponytail.

Suddenly, Ling heard a noise. She tensed up immediately. Another noise.

"Dammit, it can't be," she whispered to herself, fearing the worst.

It was definitely footsteps, and now she thought she heard a female voice as
well. Several voices! Ling jumped to her feet and begun climbing up the rope
leading up from the digging spot.

"Easy... dark as hell... hey, Lena... already opened... traps..." She could
now pick up fragments of sentences, spoken mostly in American-accented
English.

Finally Ling reached the great chamber, which was half-illuminated by light
from the outside. Four figures were moving in the middle of the light. She
picked up her binoculars and scoped them out.

All four were women and Caucasian. They were wearing military camo pants and
matching shirts, and some of them military headgear. But what really made
Ling's heartbeat race was the fact that they were all carrying automatic
weapons.

"Kat, Alex, Sophia, this way," the woman in the front said and waved her hand,
and Ling made an educated guess that this was Lena. She was a buxom, wide-
hipped brunette who walked with a cocky, yet feminine, swagger. Her face was
mostly hidden behind a pair of large, reflective sunglasses and she was
wearing a black army brand baseball cap.

"What do we do if we bump into a, uh, local?" one of the other women asked.
She was almost as buxom as Lena, but her hair was blond, and her camouflage-
patterned shirt had been left unbuttoned to reveal a large portion of her
cleavage.

"Use your brain, Kat," answered another woman. This one had dark hair, a light
brown sun tan, and a hint of Latino features. She had classical hourglass
curves and large, round breasts. On her head she was wearing a black beret
with gold insignia.

"Kat's brain is in her boobs, everyone knows that," the fourth one interjected
in an Australian accent, prompting laughter. This one was a redhead, with
piercing green eyes and light freckles on her pale cheeks. She was the least
buxom of the four, but her hips were still femininely rounded and her breasts
bulky and firm.

"Shut up, Alexis," Kat snapped, "I'd rather have big tits than none at all!"

More laughter. Ling made the logical conclusion that, if Alexis was the red-
head, the sun-tanned brunette must be Sophia.

"OK, guys, remember the contract," Lena said impatiently, interrupting the
silly quarrel. "Two thousand grand for each whole antique. Up to a hundred for
a piece or shard. Bringing antiques out of China is illegal, so if anyone
catches us doing it, we take them down. Any questions before we begin?"

Ling was so outraged that she could feel every muscle in her body tense up.
Something needed to be done, but she had no weapons or cellphone on her, and
the women she was up against were all armed to the teeth. At the very least
she needed to get out of the temple, but doing so would require her to somehow
move around the mercenaries before they came near her.

Still, it was worth a shot, she thought, and begun sneaking as quietly as she
could along the wall in the direction of the exit. She had the benefit of
moving in shadow, but there was always an off chance that they could see the
glint of her-

"Hey you!" Lena suddenly shouted.

Ling stopped, mid-step, and saw that all four of the mercenaries were pointing
their guns at her.

"Don't move! Get your ass over here! Now!"

Ling obeyed, and stepped out into the light. Lena walked up to her, grabbed
her by the ponytail, and lifted her up on tip-toe. The physical contrast
couldn't be more striking -- even on her toes, Ling's forehead reached no
higher than Lena's cleavage.

This was not lost on the other mercenaries, who burst out laughing. Lena
smiled coolly, and grabbed Ling's chin in a claw-like grip.

"You heard every word, didn't you?" She said.

Ling nodded, staring furiously into the dark sunglasses in front of her.
"You're trying to steal the treasure and sell it for money. But it doesn't
belong to you!"

Lena flinched, taken aback by her courage. "OK, listen up, little girl. I
don't know if you think you're some kind of Chinese Nancy Drew or if you're
just plain stupid, but we've got guns. Guns! So you'd better mind your damn
manners, kid!"

"I'm not a little girl!" Ling snapped. "I'm probably not much younger than
you!"

"Not a little girl," Lena said, smirking sadistically. "Did you hear that,
girls?"

The other women laughed, and Ling felt her cheeks turn red with fury.

"She's right, I'd say "12-year old boy" more than anything," Kat said,
prompting more laughter. "Hey, nice curves, honey!"

"I think you could probably balance an egg on those tits," Alexis added.

"Hear that, sweetcheeks?" Lena said, tugging hard at Ling's ponytail. "The
verdict's in: you're a chink, and like all chinks, you're a little girl. Now,
are you ready to do what I say, or do I have to slap some sense into you?"

This was it, Ling thought. Now it was personal -- there was no way she could
let this slip. Seething with anger, she cleared her throat.

"You couldn't take me in a four-on-one fight if you didn't have those guns. In
fact, I'm pretty sure you're nothing without them."

A stunned silence followed. Finally, Lena started to chuckle, and the others
joined in.

"OK, Mulan, have it your way," she said, pinching Ling's cheek. "You're too
fun to waste just like that anyway!"

The four mercenaries put their automatic weapons on the floor with a metallic
clatter. Lena nodded toward Alexis. The redhead unbuttoned her jacket and let
it drop to the floor, leaving her in a white tank top, and stepped forward.
She stopped in front of Ling and stared down at her, contemptously.

"Have a shot, then," she said condescendingly. "Hit me as hard as you can."

Ling, deciding to play to the Westerners' prejudice, landed a weak slap on
Alexis' cheek.

"Oh, that stings!" Alexis said sarcastically, causing the others to laugh.
"That'll leave a mark, for sure! Again, sweetie, again!"

Ling hit her twice more.

"I'm feeling dizzy! I think I'm down for the count!" Alexis slurred to the
roaring laughter of her peers. "No, wait, wait, I think I'm coming back, I'm
coming, I'm coming--"

SLAM! Alexis sucker-punched Ling right in her stomach, causing her to double
over with pain.

"And it's a touchdown! Thanks for playing, honey, but no cigar. What's that?"
She stooped and put her hand to her ear. "You want more? Well, have another
shot then, one more, atta girl!"

Ling produced the weakest kick she could muster, landing on Alexis' shin.

"Oh no, you didn't!" Alexis yelled, to a chorus of laughter. "How am I going
to walk now? My legs! My legs! Oh wait, I'm feeling this one, I'm really feel-
ing this one, hang on--"

WHAM! Alexis landed a whip-hard kick straight across Ling's chest, sending her
flying three feet back and landing on her ass.

"THAT's a kick, honey! THAT's a kick. Hope you're taking notes. Anyway, for
real now, right? Come on, honey, let's have a fight where none of us are
holding back!"

Ling got up on her feet and began walking up to her.

"OK, honey, you'd best get ready, 'cause this time *I* start! OK?"

This time, Alexis fired off a punch toward Ling's face, which she blocked by
extending her arm upwards, deflecting it. Alexis threw another punch with her
other hand, which Ling deflected with her other arm. Wasting no time, Ling
followed up by firing two lightning fast punches straight to Alexis' face --
SLAM! -- turning the baffled Australian's head left -- SLAM! -- turning it
right -- and then -- WHAM! -- headbutted it so hard that the redhead's green
eyes nearly glazed over. Finally she grabbed Alexis' hand and threw her over
her shoulder in a perfect judo throw.

The Australian girl landed hard on her round ass, and was so dazed that she
remained sitting, legs akimbo, on the stone floor.

"What's this!?" Kat cried. "Lena, let's kick her ass!"

Lena, however, motioned her to wait and react. Ling glanced in her direction,
and saw that she too was shocked at what was happening.

"My tail bone huuuuuurts!" Alexis was whining, when Ling casually walked up to
her, grabbed her by the collar and raised her to her feet. Then she started
slapping the redhead across the cheeks once, twice, three times, and kept
going until the Australian girl's cheeks had changed color from the usual fair
tone to a glistening, bright red.

"Come on, Lena, let's tear her apart!" Kat shouted. Lena, once again, motioned
her to wait.

When Alexis had been slapped so hard that her eyes were rolling around in
their sockets, Ling reached down and untied the belt to the redhead's
trousers, then pulled them down, revealing a pair of butt-hugging black cotton
panties. Alexis, still dazed but furious, jerked forward to hit the nimble
Chinese girl, but her pants were nestled around her ankles and she tripped
over them -- landing face-first on the stone floor. Getting up, the redhead
tried to scramble away on her hands and knees, but Ling quickly brought her
back to square one with a swift kick in the rump, sending her to the floor
again.

"OW! Lenaaaaa!" Alexis whined, as Ling dropped her butt down on the redhead's
back and started bouncing up and down, flattening her boobs with each impact.
After a while, Ling grabbed the hem of Alexis' top and tugged at it until it
tore into two strips from behind, and the halves fell to the floor, leaving
the redhead in a black push-up bra. After that, Ling went back to bobbing up
and down on her opponent's back, enjoying the squishy friction of the soft
balloons that were taking the entire blow between the redhead's ribs and the
hard stone floor.

"OOOWW! My TITS! She's MASHING them-OWW!" At this point, Ling decided to up
the ante and grabbed Alexis' red hair from behind, tugging at it with each
bounce. When she had done this for almost a full minute, she suddenly stopped,
and stood up over the panting redhead. She then dragged Alexis to her feet by
tugging at her hair, and left her in a standing position as she inched each of
the disoriented redhead's feet away from each other until she was standing
with her legs well apart. Then, deciding it was high time to wrap this one up,
Ling aimed carefully, and then fired a whip-hard kick straight into the
spread- legged redhead's unprotected snatch. Ling could feel her toe, through
the thin fabric of panty, part the lips of the white girl's vagina and plunge
straight inside, until it struck bone.

CRRUNCH! "EEE-!" Alexis hands flew to her mangled cooch and she gave up a
pitiful whimper, then keeled over and passed out in a pile on the floor.

"OK, that does it!" Lena yelled. "Girls, let's tear this bitch a new one!"

A chorus of gun-related noises erupted as the girls picked up their automatic
weapons, and switched off their safeties. Ling, not skipping a beat, swiftly
bent down and tore the belt out of Alexis' discarded pants.

Sophia was the first to raise her gun, but by the time she had placed her
finger on the trigger, Ling had already cartwheeled up to her and -- employing
the belt like a whip -- struck aside the gunpipe with a well-placed lash. The
gun went off and begun firing at nothing. Ling followed up by landing a hard
kick in Sophia's midsection, and then struck the weapon completely out of her
hands.

"Shoot her! Shoot h-- OOMPH!" Sophia cried, until Ling planted her fist into
her soft belly with a muffled thud. Lena fired at the Chinese girl, but hit
nothing, because Ling had already spun around, and -- swinging the belt in her
hands -- delivered a stinging lash to Sophia's shapely ass, the strike of
leather against buttocks echoing through the temple like a thunder clap.

"OOOHH!" Sophia cried out, digging her hands into her sore behind, which was a
bad decision, since Ling quickly wrapped the belt around the dark haired Cau-
casian's slim wrists and pulled, tying them up securely behind her back. The
Chinese girl then ripped Sophia's own belt out of her trousers, causing the
pants to plummet to her ankles (revealing a tight white thong), and used the
second belt to tie up her legs. Sophia had now been rendered completely
harmless, and could only squirm and blush in her humiliating bondage. Ling
needed only to give her a soft push in the back, and she toppled over like a
tree, falling hard on her plump breasts with a pained "Oooh!", and could do
nothing to get up.

Kat and Lena looked at each other for a split second, then put their guns in
automatic and begun firing like maniacs. When they had emptied their clips,
Ling was gone -- escaped into shadow. Kat was in the process of reloading when
the Chinese girl suddenly materialized behind her, gathered up the blonde's
long silky hair in her hands and pulled at it with her full strength.

"OOOOWWW!!" the blonde screamed, and Ling took advantage of her confusion by
wrestling the machine gun out her hands, grabbing it by the pipe, and slamming
the entire fourteen pounds of steel into Kat's half-exposed tits, like a
baseball player hitting a perfect swing. The Caucasian's full breasts were
flattened like pancakes before spilling out again, and Kat could only produce
an agonized whim- per. But Ling was not done yet. Using the leftover force
from the gun bouncing back into her hands, she fluidly turned the same motion
into a perfect golf swing -- sending the heavy butt of the machine gun all the
way up between Kat's legs. The steel end connected with the blonde's vagina
with a hollow thud, and seconds later the Caucasian was on her knees whining
with pain.

'She's not going to be peeing comfortably any time soon,' Ling thought to
herself as she walked around Kat, looked at her long, blond hair and got a
bright idea. She bent down, measured the hair in her hands, then pulled back
the blonde's wrists all the way to her shoulder blades, and tied them up using
the blonde's own hair. Kat was now forced to keep her hands in the same
position, or else would risk causing herself major pain.

Ling glanced at Lena, who was pointing her gun in her direction, but could not
shoot as long as she was hiding behind Kat. Going back to her work, Ling pro-
ceeded to tug down Kat's pants to her knees, and had to raise an eyebrow when
she noticed that the mercenary was wearing a skimpy black g-string underneath.
She snapped the tight string against the blonde's bum (enjoying the yelp it
produced from above), and then slipped it down to her ankles as well, leaving
the blonde naked from the waist down. Finally the Chinese girl used the
flexible, rubber-like g-string to tie the white girl's ankles securely, and
tripped the blonde face down to the floor. Lying down half-naked and tied up
with her own hair, Kat too found herself unable to do anything else than
squirm uselessly.

Now Lena was the only mercenary left standing. Ling stared deep into the dark
of her sunglasses, and tried to gauge her reaction. Lena smiled a chilly
smile, but Ling immediately called her bluff.

"You don't have any ammo left, do you?" the Chinese girl said casually.

Lena's smile stiffened. She swore silently and threw the weapon to the floor.

"But that's all right, I'm just a little girl, right?" Ling mocked her.
"Surely you can take me in a fistfight."

"Cocky little bitch," Lena snapped. "You got lucky with those three and now
you think you're Bruce Lee."

Ling and Lena circled each other, the Chinese girl's hot black eyes burning
into the cool of the brunette's shades. Ling had never even met a Caucasian
girl before today, much less been in a fight with one. Now she had already
taken three of them on well-deserved trips to the woodshed, but she could
sense that Lena was in a whole different league compared to her colleagues.
Nonetheless, when Ling ran her eyes over the buxom white girl's thick
eyebrows, her pouty, tightly pressed lips, her round, bulky chest, her broad
hips, and her wide calves, and recalled the out- rage she had felt when she
first read about the temple raiding trend among young female Westerners, she
knew instantly that she could -- and WOULD -- teach this bratty, self-entitled
white chick a well-deserved lesson.

Lena was the first one to act. She took a few steps forward and fired a hard
punch into Ling's belly. The Chinese girl quickly recovered, but Lena had
already grabbed both her wrists and trapped her in a steady hold. Ling looked
up at the brunette's face. She was smiling with self-satisfaction.

"You know why I'm glad I don't have bird tits like yours?" Lena asked. A
second later she shoved her large firm breasts into the Chinese girl's face,
and begun rubbing them in it, smothering Ling's squirming body as she
continued to hold her stuck. "'Cause then I couldn't do THIS!" Lena declared,
and laughed when she heard Ling give up an involuntary muffled cry.

Ling, trying to keep her head cool, begun searching around on the floor with
her foot, until she had located both of Lena's legs, and found that they were
far apart. Then, breathing in, she rocketed her knee up the brunette's crotch
as hard as she could. THUD! Lena squealed and stopped moving her breasts. Ling
kneed her in the groin a second time. SLAM! A louder squeal, and the tits
moved away from the Chinese girl's face, allowing her to breathe. A third time
-- CRUNCH! -- and she heard a loud cry, and Lena had to let go of her hands to
attend to her pelvic region.

Ling, now completely free, quickly circled around the tall Caucasian girl and
landed a sharp chop with her elbow between the brunette's shoulder blades.
Lena fell on her hands and knees with a loud moan, and Ling sat down on her
back, as calmly as if mounting a horse.

"You know why I'm glad I don't have cow tits like yours?" Ling asked sweetly,
listening to the brunette's quick, heaving breaths. Then she suddenly leapt up
into the air and crashed her bottom down on Lena's back, causing the brunette
to fall hard on her firm breasts, flattening them against the floor. "Well,
now you know!"

"OOOHHH!" Lena wailed. The Chinese girl, her confidence now having reached a
level of total calm, pulled off the brunette's cap and ran her hands over
Lena's silky hair, then begun tugging it backwards. Lena's head arched up from
the floor with a short squeal. Ling pulled harder, and the Caucasian girl's
head arched up higher and her squeals grew louder. Finally, Ling was pulling
the chestnut mane so hard in her direction that Lena's entire upper body was
forming a backwards arch, with her face pointing toward the ceiling and her
chest jutting out in front of her.

"AAIIEEE!! STOP IT, STOP IT!" Lena cried, and Ling abruptly let go of her
hair, sending the Caucasian girl's upper body crashing back into the floor,
her breasts taking most of the blow once again. The brunette was now
whimpering with pain, but as long as Ling was holding her body down with her
legs and sharp, tight behind, she couldn't even get her arms free.

"What's the matter, Barbie? Feeling a little stung in the udders?" Ling asked,
and then turned around so that she was facing the Caucasian girl's curvy
backside. She ran her hand up the brunette's left ass cheek, and then gave it
a big pinch. "I wonder how you girls could ever become mercenaries, with those
big, flopping tits and asses you've got. Even with camouflage, your enemy
could just aim for whatever around them is jiggling, and be sure to hit a
bullseye."

"Bitch!" Lena hissed, her cheeks red with humiliation. Hearing this, Ling
reached down and grabbed hold of the furious white girl's feet, and pulled
them toward her until the brunette's legs were folded -- her heels lying
pressed against her buttocks. Then the Chinese girl sat down on Lena's shins,
facing her head this time, and placed her foot between the brunette's shoulder
blades. Finally, she grabbed the white girl's slender arms and begun pulling
backwards, once again jerking up Lena's upper body, but this time putting the
pressure on her shoulders. Lena's face slowly grew pink, and then red, and
then she begun squealing.

"MY ARMS! OWOWOWOW!" She yelled as Ling gave her arms and shoulders the most
intense stretching they had ever endured. After about a full minute, Ling
finally let go of the brunette's sore arms, and let her upper body collapse to
the floor, heaving and panting. Feeling ready to deliver the coup de grace,
Ling grabbed hold of Lena's left arm and raised her up on shaky legs. She then
clasped both her hands securely around the Caucasian girl's sweaty wrist, and
-- using her entire muscle strength -- executed a perfect judo throw that sent
Lena flying almost six feet across the room before her wide backside slammed
into the floor with an echoing THWACK!

When Ling walked up to Lena, the brunette was sitting where she landed,
sobbing and rubbing the top of her ass, making no effort to get up. Ling
squatted in front of the mercenary and studied her where she sat. Lena had
raised an arm in front of herself in a vulnerable -- almost girly --
protective posture, and was breathing # quickly and anxiously, staring at her
as if suddenly overcome with fear.

"It's curious," Ling said, "but all that talk about little girls suddenly
makes a whole lot more sense to me. It's just that you got the wrong person,"
She reached out and snatched the sunglasses away from Lena's face, revealing a
pair of scared, icy blue eyes peering up at her from behind a fringe of
tousled brown hair. "The little girl is you!"

And it was true -- with her messy hair, pleading eyes, quivering lips, and
hand rubbing her bottom, the buxom woman in the military clothing now looked
remarkably like a little girl who had been caught red-handed in the middle of
a naughty deed.

"And a very bad little girl, at that," Ling added, watching Lena's eyes widen
with fear, "one might even say... a NAUGHTY girl. And what do naughty girls
get when they misbehave?"

The Chinese girl looked deep into the brunette's eyes.

"They get spanked on their naughty butts, that's what!"

"Nooooo!" Lena protested, as Ling promptly grabbed the curvy Caucasian woman,
who probably weighed twice as much as her, and tipped her gently over her knee
with her rear end pointing upwards. She then slid the brunette's trousers down
her legs, exposing a pair of undersized white panties stretched thin over the
plump ass, and threw the discarded pants into a corner. Ling proceeded to pull
off Lena's shirt, and unclasp her bra, finally leaving the disgraced white
girl only in her skimpy little panties.

"I hate to break it to you, but your ass isn't small enough to fit into
these," Ling said, pulling the hem of the panties and letting it snap back on
Lena's ass like a whip. Each time she did it, the brunette gave up a
vulnerable little yelp, which kept Ling entertained for a while, before she
finally slid down the panties as well, leaving the blushing white girl as
naked as the day she was born.

Ling raised her hand and delivered a stinging slap to Lena's ass, with a
resounding SMACK! "OOOHH!" the brunette cried, and Ling looked down at the
faint red handprint fading away on the pale bottom draped across her knees,
savoring the moment. Then she smacked it again -- SMACK! "Aah!" -- and again
-- SMACK! "OOOW!" -- and again -- SMACK! "OOOW!" -- and as she kept on
spanking the whimpering Lena, an intense satisfaction begun spreading through
Ling's body. Seeing this bratty white woman, whom she had subdued into
complete submissiveness, and feeling her firm ass ripple beneath her stinging
palm and the woman's compact breasts beating against her leg in rhythm with
each spank, and listening to her girly yelps and helpless protests, was the
realization of something she had wanted to do ever since she had first seen a
photo of two buxom white temple raiders in the Xi'an Daily Mail. Now she had
the very ebodiment of all those sacrilegious gweilo bitches sobbing and
twisting over her lap, and she was ready to whack every ounce of
self-entitlement out of her silly ass. The Caucasian girl was now bawling like
a baby, but Ling kept on spanking harder and harder, beating the firm,
bouncing cheeks as if she was beating the dust off an old rug.

"AAAOOOOHHHH!!!" Lena screamed as her ass was literally getting the daylights
whipped out of it, and quickly thereafter she made a sudden attempt to escape.
Ling, however, casually grabbed her by the hair and pulled her back over her
knee, and resumed the spanking. "Oh no, you're not done yet," Ling said,
although she realized that her hand had grown almost completely numb, and that
the color of Lena's rump had gone from pale pink to a burning, humiliating
crimson. After spanking her for a good five minutes longer, Ling suddenly
landed a final spank on her white captive's no longer at all white buns, and
then let the brunette slide down on the floor with a defeated groan and a soft
thud.

Ling picked up Lena's sunglasses and put them on. Feeling a new sensation --
pride -- pass through her body like a warm, rejuvenating vapor, she looked out
over the four groaning and twisting white bodies and thought everything
through. She couldn't take them to the police, since she wanted to keep the
temple a secret from the authorities until she was sure she could store away
all the artifacts from untrust- worthy middle hands and corrupt bureaucrats.
She would have to make something up.

Three minutes later, all the mercenaries' clothing, shoes, hats, underwear and
military gear had been assembled in a neat pile, and the four Caucasian women
were standing, naked and humiliated, in a row in front of Ling.

"Listen up, you tarts," Ling said, "From now on, none of this ever happened. I
don't want to lose these relics, and you don't want to go to jail. OK? So this
is what happened: you came to China as tourists, not mercenaries. Dumb as you
are, you took a trip into the desert where you were planning on doing some
nude sun- bathing. While you were lying down there with your asses in the air,
a pack of wild dogs ran away with your clothes. You were unable to get them
back, and now you are about to walk all the way to the nearest village and
explain this embarassing situation to the villagers."

The mercenaries raised their voices to protest, but were quieted when Ling
pulled out a belt that she had been holding behind her back.

"Did I mention that you have three seconds to start running, before..." belt
slapping against hand, "...I help you on your way?"

Suddenly, the mercenaries were stumbling over each other to get away, and two
and a half seconds later the last pair of jiggling buns disappeared through
the crack in the ruined wall through which they had entered the temple.

Ling couldn't tear her mind away from her triumph for the whole rest of the
day. "If I were a bit less of a realist, I could almost see myself turning
this into a business idea," she mused to herself. "Temple Raider-Busters, it
could be called. No, sounds too clunky. Ling's Temple Protection Service?
Wait, what about..."

***

LING'S COUNTER-RAIDING BUREAU opened five days later, and one year hence, it
had transformed into a hugely profitable one woman enterprise. By then, Ling
had moved her business into a swanky office, and had decorated its walls with
news- paper clippings, "mementos" from memorable encounters with temple
raiders, and photographs of herself sitting on top of one or even a pile of
thoroughly humiliated temple intruders, usually with little or no clothing
left on their bodies. Right above the desk where she sat hung a massive
gold-trimmed paddle emblazoned with the Chinese letter for "penance".

The phone rang. Ling picked it up on the first signal. "Hello?"

"Ling, I've got information about a group of three heading for the Sky Dragon
Mountain Temple in about two hours. The leader is no one less than Lindsay
Whitehill, the multi-millionaire Texas oil heiress."

Ling logged into her computer and did a google search on that name. She was
immediately greeted with a large photo of the haughty, enormously bratty-
looking young blonde, posing with her hands on her hips in a fashionable white
silk shirt, unbuttoned at the top to reveal a triangle of tight cleavage, and
a pair of designers jeans clinging to her well-rounded hips. Over her
shoulder, a towering oil derrick dominated the Texas landscape, and a red text
had been superimposed over her midriff: "LINDSAY WHITEHILL GOES INTO RELIC
HUNTING: 'IN IT FOR THE THRILL,' SHE SAYS IN EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW".

"Two hours? I'll be waiting for her," Ling said and hung up the phone.

Getting up from her chair, she carefully loosened the massive paddle from her
wall, crammed it into a shoulder bag, slung the bag over her shoulder and
hurried out to prepare a suitably "thrilling" welcome for Miss Whitehill.

THE END