Finding Out Who I Am
By Muscle Fan



My name is Allison Porter and my husband, Jim, have been married three years.
We married not long after college and everyone said we were the perfect
couple. And so it would appear, but lately, Jim's interests have been, well,
not focused on me or our relationship. In fact, I was afraid I was losing him.

One evening, we were watching TV. Jim was flipping the channels when he came
upon a sports network. I like baseball, football, etc., but this was a
bodybuilding contest. I was surprised when Jim stopped playing with the remote
and watched as the men went through their routines.

I say I was surprised because you would only have to look at Jim to know that
he was not into physical fitness or a 'gym rat.' He has developed a bit of a
paunch and about the exercise he gets is mowing the grass or taking the dog
for a walk, so I was surprised when he watched these muscle men strut their
stuff.

The men's competition ended and I thought Jim would resume flipping through
the TV channels, but the women came on stage and Jim seemed to lean forward in
his seat. I had never seen a bodybuilding competition, men or women, so I was
drawn to watching these women strut and flex their muscles. They were
certainly well defined and with their skimpy posing suits, left little to the
imagination.

I glanced at Jim who was riveted to the television screen, and that's when I
noticed that he had an erection. He may have sensed my glances at him because
he pulled a pillow from the couch we were sitting on into his lap.

That night, Jim took longer in the bathroom than normal and I made my mind up
there and then that I needed to do something, but what? In the morning, Jim
was off to the office early and I dressed and drove to the market. I did my
shopping and then took a different route home. I was still thinking about my
marriage when I saw a sidewalk sign with balloons attached. 'Grand Opening,'
the sign said, it was a gym. My mind flashed back to those women in the
competition on TV last night, the one's that caught Jim's attention. 'Maybe
that's what Jim likes,' I thought, 'muscle women.'

I pulled around the corner and into the alley behind the shops. I stopped at
the open rear door of the gym and went in. The girl behind the counter, Erin,
while she didn't look like one of the bodybuilders that I saw on TV, was in
good shape. She made me feel welcomed and comfortable and explained that they
were new to the neighborhood and trying to get people interested in physical
fitness. She walked me around the gym and pointed out some of the equipment
based on what my desires and expectations were. I didn't tell her that one of
my expectations was to salvage my marriage.

I signed up for a short term membership. 'What could it hurt,' I thought as I
drove home, 'Heaven knows I could stand to lose a few pounds and firm up some
areas.' By the time I got home and put the groceries away, I was feeling
pretty well about my decision and went to see if I still had any gym clothes
that would fit.

Easing into working out, I followed Erin's instructions. Over the course of
three weeks, and with Erin's help, I began to see some changes in my body. My
bit of a tummy was becoming smaller and my arms and specifically my triceps
were becoming firmer. I liked what I saw in the bathroom mirror. If Jim
noticed, he said nothing, but I didn't let that discourage me.

My stamina was building and I took on different exercises and increased my
weights. I was spending a longer time at the gym going from a forty-five
minute workout to now an hour and a half workout. I felt great.

It was about this time a new person began coming to the gym. She wore baggy
sweat pants and usually a hooded sweatshirt. Our workout times coincided,
however, she was usually still there when I left. Also, I noticed that she did
more lifting of free weights than I did; heavy weight.

"You're doing that wrong," a voice said from behind me as I was bent over a
flat bench doing triceps dumbbell kick-backs. I glanced in the mirror at the
girl in the hoody. She had jet black hair tied in a ponytail. "You need to
keep the upper part of your arm parallel with the ground," she said. "Ah,
thanks," I said, and sat my fifteen-pound dumbbell on the ground. "I'm Margo,"
she said, extending a hand. I shook her hand, "Allison," I said, "thanks for
the tip, did you want to work in?" She smiled and hesitated then said, "Sure,
thanks," and taking a forty-five pound dumbbell from the rack, sat it near the
bench.

"That's pretty heavy weight, Margo," I said. The smile never left her face and
she said, "Hmm, not too heavy, it's my first set." I watched as Margo bent
over the flat bench and put her knee on it and then did ten perfectly executed
dumbbell kick-backs. She switched knees and hands working her other arm. She
sat the weight on the floor and stood up. I took up my position on the bench
and mimicked Margo's set. On my eighth rep, I slowed and Margo supported my
upper arm with one hand while helping me lift the weight with her other. I
switched hands and needed help with my seventh rep.

"Thanks," I said, re-racking my dumbbell. "Not a problem, Allison," she said,
"You're getting the hang of it."

Over the next several weeks our paths crossed repeatedly in the gym and we
began to talk. Well, more accurately, I began to talk. Things still weren't
going well with Jim and me. He continued to show little interest in me even
though my body had changed and I had turned the ten pounds of fat into ten
pounds of muscle. I was becoming increasingly concerned. I wanted to save our
marriage and I expressed this to Margo.

"Why don't you come over tomorrow," Margo told me as we did seated rows on one
of the machines, "It's going to be warm and we can go for a swim rather than
workout. Swimming is a good alternative to weights." The idea appealed to me.
Jim and I didn't have a pool and the weather in southern California was
forecasted to be 82-degrees (28C.) tomorrow. "That sounds nice," I said, "I'd
like that, can I bring anything?" She chuckled, "No, nothing," she said and
unzipped the pocket on her hoody and handed me a business card. "My address is
on the back," she said. I took the card and looked at it, glossy black with
white lettering that simply said, 'Mistress Margo', and gave a phone number.
"Mistress Margo?" I asked. "Yes," she said, "but we can get into that
tomorrow," and she began her second set of seated rows.

The following day I drove to Margo's house. It was on a large lot, lushly
landscaped and set back from the street. It was secluded. I parked in the
drive and rang the doorbell. "Allison," Margo said when she answered the door,
"did you have any trouble finding the house?" "No, not at all," I said as I
stepped into the entryway, "thank goodness for GPS." I looked around the
foyer; the floor was terrazzo with two overstuffed wing chairs. If the
entryway was an indication of the rest of the house, this home would be huge.
Then I looked at my hostess. This was the first time I had seen Margo in
anything but sweat pants and a sweatshirt.

Margo wore a red kimono which ended mid-thigh. Thighs that were well muscled
with thick veins. Her calves were the most muscular I've seen, man or woman. I
looked up to find her smiling, but she didn't comment.

"This way," Margo said, and I followed her down a hallway to a great room.
"Can I get you something to drink?" she asked, "Lemonade, ice tea, water,
wine?" I laughed. "An ice tea would be great," I said, "if it's not too much
trouble." Margo's smile was infectious, "No, not at all." She pressed a button
on a nearby end table and a male voice behind me said, "Yes, mistress."

I turned at the sound of his voice and a tall, handsome, tanned well-built man
stood in the doorway. "Brian, bring Allison an ice tea, and a glass of
lemonade for me, we'll take them on the patio," Margo said, and the man turned
and left. The fact that the man was so handsome was one thing, but the fact
that he wore a pair of Speedo swim trunks was something else.

"Was that your husband?" I asked. Margo laughed and said, "Oh, no, that was
Brian, I guess you could call him my houseboy." "Houseboy?" I asked, "He's
very handsome." Margo continued to smile and said, "He is, isn't he, and he
knows how to please a woman too, but come, let's go out by the pool." I
followed her as she opened one of the French doors leading outside.

Margo's back yard was an entertainers dream; built-in barbecue, two tables
with umbrellas, two tables without, ten chaise lounges around a large swimming
pool and spa. A cabana was on the far side of the pool.

"You certainly have a beautiful home here and a great back yard," I said. The
French door opened and Brian came out with a tray on witch was a small carafe
of ice tea and one of lemonade. He sat the tray on one of the tables in the
shade and took the carafes, glasses and ice bucket from the tray. "Will there
be anything else, mistress," he asked. I couldn't help staring at the man and
the bulge in his trunks. 'If only Jim were so well equipped,' I found myself
thinking, and had to shake my head to clear the thought. "That will be fine,
Brian," Margo said, and he turned and padded to the house.

"Let's lay in the sun a bit, then we can swim a few laps," Margo said, taking
her lemonade. "Where can I change," I asked. She looked at me and then said,
"There's no need to change, Allison," and untied the sash around her kimono,
shrugging it from her shoulders, "It's just us." "But what ... " 'about
Brian,' I was going to say, but then I saw Margo's body and didn't finish my
sentence.

Margo was big, not fat, but big; wide shoulders tapering to a trim waist and
narrow hips with washboard abdominals. She looked better than the female
bodybuilders Jim and I had watched on TV weeks earlier. Her forearms were
vascular and her upper arms muscular. "Did I shock you, Allison?" she asked.
Regaining my composure, I said, "Yes, I've only seen you at the gym wearing
sweats, I didn't know you looked like that?" She chuckled and struck a double
bicep pose, "Like what, muscular?" Her arms were massive, bigger than Jim's,
but that wasn't saying much. I nodded.

"You know I've worked very hard honing this body, sculpting it and developing
it into what it is. Do you like it, Allison," she asked. I nodded again. "Hmm,
good, now get undressed," she said. I looked back at the house and Margo said,
"Don't worry about Brian, baby, get undressed."

I was wearing a sleeveless sun dress which buttoned down the front. I began
unbuttoning my dress and then shrugged it from my shoulders. It fell to the
deck and I stepped out of it and bent to pick it up. "Don't," Margo said,
"Take off the bra and panties." I looked at her and reached behind my back to
unfasten my bra. Unhooked I shrugged the straps from my shoulders and let it
fall atop my dress.

I stood facing Margo. She didn't say anything, merely stared at me until I
slid my panties down my thighs and stepped out of them. I felt warm and cold
all at the same time. I felt as if I were in a trance. Finally Margo said,
"Put them on a chair, Brian." I looked over my shoulder to find Brian standing
behind me. "Yes, mistress," he said and crouched to retrieve my bra, panties
and dress from the concrete.

A bit startled by the man's presence, I stepped aside. He looked up at me and
then stood and laid my clothing on the back of a chair. "Brian, pleasure our
new guest," Margo said. Brian knelt on the pool deck and I took another step
back bumping into a chair.

"Have you ever had a man take you orally, Allison?" Margo asked. I couldn't
speak, but I shook my head. "A woman?" she inquired. I tore my eyes away from
the man kneeling at my feet and looked at Margo. "No," I said softly. "Hmm,"
she mused, "then this will be a first," and she nodded to Brian. He placed his
hands on the back of my thighs and slowly flicked my labia as softly as if it
were a butterfly. I tensed and Margo said, "Relax, Allison, Brian is quite
skilled and I guarantee you'll enjoy his attention."

Brian intensified his thrusts with his tongue. He took my labia between his
lips and sucked and then pulled. He found my clitoris and again, with the tip
of his tongue, I became aroused. I put my hands on the back of the chair
behind me to steady myself. I closed my eyes willing him not to stop. I felt
as though I was floating and then the sensation or an orgasm started deep
inside. My breathing turned to a pant and with a shudder, I climaxed. My knees
felt week and I was sure that had I not been holding onto the chair, I would
have fallen. It must have taken a full minute for my breathing to return to
normal.

I opened my eyes. Brian got to his feet, a smile on his face, and a droplet of
my juice on his lower lip. He wiped it away with that marvelous tongue. I tore
my gaze away from this handsome man and looked at Margo who was smiling
broadly. "That will be all, Brian," Margo said to him. "Yes, mistress," he
said and smiled at me before he turned and left.

"I don't need to ask how that was, Allison, I can see you enjoyed it," she
said, "That is how Jim needs to treat you." I looked at her curiously and she
continued. "Have your husband go down on you, control him, set the
boundaries." I shook my head and asked, "But how?" She looked at me and said,
"From what you've told me, it won't be difficult. You said that he was turned
on watching female bodybuilders." "Yes," I said, "but I'm hardly that." "No,
but you've gotten leaner, stronger and more defined. I can see it and Jim will
too," she said, "be dominant and he'll do what you want." 'Maybe Margo is
right, we need a spark in our sex life,' I thought.

"One thing you do need to do though," she said smiling, "get rid of that
bush!" I followed her gaze to my pubic hair. I had never shaved or trimmed it.
"I'll give you the name of the girl that waxes me," Margo said, "she'll take
care of you." I nodded somewhat embarrassed.

"Come on, let's go for a swim, or would you rather go inside and have Brian
show you some of his other talents?" and Margo laughed.

We spent the rest of the afternoon lounging in the sun and swimming. I hadn't
been skinny dipping since I was a child. Brian served us lunch and refreshed
our drinks and then joined us on the terrace. We spoke candidly. Margo told me
about being a dominatrix, how she and Brian had met and how he pleased her
both sexually as well as emotionally. Brian told me about his love of muscular
women and his need to be controlled. He said he was rewarded with the most
fantastic sex while living his fantasy catering to Mistress Margo.

I was living my fantasy just being in the company of Margo and Brian, talking
openly as well as being naked. Since Jim and I had been married, I hadn't seen
another man naked and Jim was certainly no Brian. Brian was well endowed, but
I still loved my husband and was even more determined to make our marriage
work.

By the time I left, I knew what I had to do. I would have to step outside my
comfort zone and be the assertive one in the marriage. I still had a long way
to go in honing my body, maybe not to where Margo was, but to get to where I
wanted to be.

I played down my visit to Margo's when Jim asked me that evening how my day
was, and of course I didn't mention about Brian bringing me to the brink of
ecstasy.

I had my pubic hair removed and continued working out. I lifted heavier weight
and, with Margo's encouragement, felt I was finally ready to ignite that spark
in Jim and my relationship.

"Allison," Jim called from the entryway as he let himself in, "I'm home." I
could hear that he sat his briefcase by the door as he did every evening and
placed his keys and wallet in a large dish on a table in the foyer.

He entered the living room where I was waiting for him. I had purchased a
leather bustier from a lingerie shop as well as a pair of black satin panties.
I wore a pair of four-inch stilettos which made me two-inches taller than Jim.
He stopped dead in his tracks once he saw me.

"Take that jacket and tie off," I said my hands on my hips. He looked at me
from head to foot. "Allison, what is this," he asked. He didn't move as I
closed ground between us and when I was standing in front of him, slapped him
open handedly on the cheek. Jim put a hand to his cheek.

"Take that jacket and tie off," I repeated, and added, "And from now on, you
will call me Mistress Allison, do you understand?" He stared at me and then
said, "But, Allison, what ... " I raised my arm as if to slap him again, but
he quickly, said, "Yes, yes, I understand, Mistress Allison," and began to
shrug out of his jacket. I can't begin to tell you the thrill of being in
control.

I took Jim's tie and said, "Turn around." He hesitated but then turned. I tied
his wrists behind his back like Margo had taught me. Once secure, I turned him
around to face me once more. "Get on your knees, Jimmy," I said. I had never
called him Jimmy, only Jim or James. Taking his left ear between my thumb and
index finger and squeezing it, I pulled down. He sunk to his knees in front of
me. I let go of his ear and he looked up at me.

"From now on, things are going to change around here," I said, "I'm in charge
of the house and you, do you understand?" He opened his mouth as if to say
something and then halted. I could almost hear his brain trying to process
this change in our routine. Finally he said softly, "Yes, mistress." I
rewarded him with a smile. "Good," I said, "Now the first thing you will do is
worship my pussy, Mistress Allison is horny and I need to climax. Do you think
you can do that, baby?" "Y-yes, mistress," he stammered.

I pulled my panties down and he saw that I had no pubic hair. He unconsciously
ran his tongue over his lips. 'Such a simple being,' I thought. I grabbed a
handful of his hair and pulled his face against my pubis. "Suck my clit, baby,
make love to your mistresses pussy," and I began to move my hips slowly. Much
to his credit, Jim seemed to know what to do. It wasn't long before I felt
myself nearing an orgasm.

"Hmm," I moaned as he brought me closer to a climax. A spasm ran through my
body as I erupted. I released his hair and looked at my husband, his face
still wet with my cum. "You'll need to clean that up," I said, "before you
shower, now stand up." He struggled to his feet, his hands still tied behind
him. I stepped out of my panties and behind him releasing his bonds.

"I'm going to shower, Jim," I told him, "When you're done cleaning the carpet
and picking up my panties, you may use the bathroom." I stood waiting and he
said, "Yes, mistress." I smiled, turned and walked to the bedroom. I knew he
was watching my ass as I walked.

This was a turning point in our marriage. Jim accepted his new role as my
submissive and it did wonders for our sex life. I allowed him to have sex with
me when I wanted it and, in turn, he seemed grateful.

To the outside world, I'm sure we seemed like the average couple, but within
our house, I was in charge. Jim did what I wanted, when I wanted, and was
becoming rapidly comfortable with the typical role reversal.

Jim appreciated who I had become. He liked my new found determination and
strength, and not just emotional strength, but physical strength as well. I
continued to work out with Margo and occasionally went to spend the day by the
pool, sans clothing. On those visits, Brian was only too happy to tend to my
needs. My body had become solid and defined, I was enjoying the new me,
finding out who I am.

If you enjoyed 'Finding Out Who I Am', please let me know at
cover.1@hotmail.com

Thank you,

Muscle Fan