Amazon birthday gift By Underdog FEMALES FOR HIRE! PROPORTIONED, WORK-OUT-AHOLICS. BODIES MADE BY IRON. FEMALES FOR HIRE! PROPORTIONED, WORK-OUT-AHOLICS. BODIES MADE BY IRON. I was reading this ad in the LA Times and could not believe my eyes. DO BIRTHDAYS, BACHELOR PARTIES, ETC. PHONE 1-714-11-BUILT! Dropping the paper, I headed straight for the phone. It took me four times to dial correctly; I was so spun up by this ad that I could not even concentrate. When the first ring came to my ear, I had visions of Giant Females built to protect and serve (just like the police department, I thought). After the fifth ring a recording finally came on. "Hello, you've reached Amazons For Hire." The voice was that of a angel, but I knew it could have been a big ole mamma with 12 kids needing extra cash. "The proportioned, iron-maiden Amazon company. Our girls are strong and sexy with big big muscles and very seductive. If you'd like to talk personally to one, listen to the stats and press the appropriate number." I was kinda skeptical, but no credit card was asked for, so I listened. "To talk to Janice, this muscle-laden doll, with a puuurfect 33-22-33 figure, 17 inch biceps, 26 inch thighs dial 1 now...." I wanted to hear more, so I continued to listen. "To talk to Beverly, a huge lass with great abs and a 34-22-35 figure, 16 1/2 inch biceps and 28 inch thighs, dial 2 now...." Boy was I tempted to talk to Beverly, but I hung on and listened to more of this recording. I'm glad I did. "To talk to Mary, a huge girl measuring at 55DD-22-38 with arms that peak at 18 1/2 inches when flexed, press 3 now." I couldn't press 3 fast enough. The recording said "Thank you and please wait for Mary to come on line." I waited for what seemed to be hours. I pictured a false advertisement case more than anything. This Phone-Line, Ad, and female stats sounded WAY WAY to good to be true. But I hung on for Mary. "Hello, I am Mary. I just got done in our private gym and happened to be pumped up. Who am I speaking to?" Yeah, right, I thought, this is a joke. "Hi, this is a skeptical man," I said! "Well skeptical, why don't you meet me later tonight and see for yourself?" Her voice sounded sincere enough, and if she wanted to meet me she must have been for real. Still unsure I asked, "What's with the birthday parties and stuff? " She answered, "I will tell you tonight, meet me at the beginning of the beach in Redondo. You'll know me......" Click! The phone hung up and I was totally confused. Where was the sales pitch, how about the birthday parties, she didn't even know me, was this a setup? I couldn't think of anyone who I pissed off enough to wanna maim me. I got ready and waited for "this evening" to come. No time, no particular place except the beginning of Redondo Beach, no nothing really. Strange, I thought, very strange. As I pulled out of my driveway, heater blasting, (it was cold for southern Cal, 38 degrees) I was still very skeptical. I wanted to have a good birthday party, invite friends and have an Amazon show up as my new girlfriend and freak everyone out. It would be a perfect setup, fool my friends and show off a luscious babe, and who knows, maybe I could hook up in the end! After all, it was my birthday tomorrow! I pulled up to the beginning of the beach in Redondo, sat in my car, listening to some Stones and searched for her. Mary, the Amazon that was built like a dream, and maybe that's all she really was. "She's my little rock n roll, uh ha ha," I was singing away when the van screamed up right next to me. It parked so fast it did the herky-jerky. Within seconds the driver got out of the car. It was a tall female, blonde hair, very tall with a long winter coat on. She turned around, and must have known who I was. She opened her coat like a flasher to show me what was underneath. "WOWW," I said out-loud! That was all I could say. She had on a tight tight red sweater. She looked as if she was trying to touch her elbows behind her back, her neck thrown back, and all I could see was mounds of red, two big cantaloupes sticking out of that sweater. I felt compelled to jump through the window. She stood there for a minute or two, I just gazed and gazed. Time stopped for me. She then knocked on the window of my passenger side, and shouted "Lemme in!" I opened the door and she quickly let herself in and took a seat. "Now do you believe me, skeptical?" she asked! "Wow, are those real?" I asked hastily, thinking that it was the dumbest thing I ever said. She then took off that long winter coat, and my heart dropped like a rock to the floorboard of my car. She had on leggings that showed her thigh muscles right through them. She then took off the sweater. Underneath was a halter top, low cut, and I saw nothing but breasts. I took my eyes up to her shoulders and they were shaped like bowling balls. Her arms were thick. They looked ready to explode with one flex. "Well," she asked, "still skeptical?" "I think I went into shock. "Mary," I said, "you are beautiful!" "I know that." She then went on to explain the company. "We do birthday parties and so on, dance and make the birthday boy happy. We do bachelor parties and..." I stopped her in mid-sentence. "I want you as my birthday gift. I then explained the whole situation to her. She agreed, and said she'd see me tomorrow. Giving her my address, she then got dressed again jumped in her van and took off. I wanted to follow her, but went home, popped in an Amazon video and took care of my feelings. I was just about to crawl into bed when the phone rang. "Hello," answering the phone and kinda drowsy. "Hi baby, this is Mary, your Amazon with the 55 inch chest, remember me?" I almost laughed. "Remember you, I can't wait to see you again," I said. I suddenly got a rush through me! "Well, a client cancelled tonight, and I am lonely. May I come over tonight? We can just call it practice." I was speechless for what seemed to be hours. "Hello?" she yelled in my ear. "Yes---ah yes...I'll be up and waiting." "Be up, please," she cooed in my ear. Click....the sound of a dial tone sounded great to me at almost midnight. This ain't happening, I know it ain't I thought. I sat and waited, as patiently as I could. The doorbell finally rang and I thought it was sounds from heaven. I answered the door and there she stood, same long coat, in all her glory. "Come in .. please," I said. Without a word, she came in, took off her coat, looked around and sighted my stereo. "Put on some music...now!!" I did just that and she pushed me to my couch. Underneath her coat she had a cutoff tee-shirt and shorts. Tight shorts. "Wow," I said aloud, "what a body!" She cooed, and seductively asked me how her big breasts look in her T-shirt. I almost answered when she cut me off. "Kneel down here baby, below me, and look up! I couldn't resist the offer. I did and when I looked up I saw her chest sticking out what seemed like miles from her body. "Oh my God," I said, "they're huge." She grabbed my hair and pulled me up to her, face to face! "Like biceps?" she asked. "Yes, oh yes I do!" She then flexed for me. Her bicep balled up like a baseball stuck under her skin. Up and down her arm went. The baseball was getting the size of a softball. "May I feel them?" I asked. "Sure baby," she said, "do they make you hard?" I felt her biceps as she continued to pose for me, not even answering her. I was hard. Almost as hard as her muscular arms. "Want to feel my breasts baby?" she asked. "Oh yes, I said, "please....." She then took off her T-shirt. What emerged were two perfectly formed breasts. Huge breasts. "My God," I said. I then squeezed them and fondled them. "Suck them," she cooed, "Try to put one in your mouth." I tried but it was too massive. As I sucked them I felt my head bobbing up and down. She was flexing them. She had total control of her massive chest and chest muscles. I backed off and watched. She bounced one then the other, then in unison. It was unreal. I had to let my bulge out. That's when she laid on her back, arching it up. Nothing on but panties. Her massive breasts pointing straight up in the air. I could see her muscles tensing up, tightening up like a vice. Her back arched and her neck leaning way back, she shouted, "Masturbate baby, look at my body and masturbate." I did and came in seconds. She was amazed that it took only seconds. "Wow honey, I must really trigger you, huh?" I thought yep, no doubt, and ever other male that had eyesight! "Do you have any weights?" she asked! "Yes, I'll get them!" "Not too heavy," she laughed. I went and got two of my heaviest dumbbells. 100 lbs each. "Ohh, my back," I said beneath my breath, but she still heard me. "Heavy dear?" she asked. "Watch!!!" she almost demanded. With nothing on but panties, she picked up the two dumbbells, with one in each hand did full curls. My mouth dropped. I watched her curl these two 100 lb dumbbells with ease. "Ohhhhh, ahhhh, I love lifting weights," she said in a very sexy tone, "it makes me so hot!" She kept lifting, she was up to 15 when she stopped. She then posed for me, bouncing each bicep one at a time. They were massive, her breasts bounced with each flex. "Like these baby?" "Oh yes," I said, "very much." "Wanna cepjob, baby?" she asked. "What the hell is a cepjob?" I said. I could only imagine what she had in mind. "Take your pants off, baby." Sitting down on the couch I took off my pants and she knelt down in front of me on the floor. She then put my hard-on between her bicep and forearm and flexed it. "My God," I shouted, "that's tight!" Next thing I knew she was moving her arm up and down. I could feel her big biceps on my hard-on. Up and down she went with her arm. It was a turnon and a half. Her breasts were bouncing too. This was unreal. I came again, all over her arms and boobs. I was totaled. Leaning back on the couch, I dozed off. The next morning, I looked around and Mary was gone. I bet I pissed her off I thought. "Damn it," I said out loud. "I didn't even do anything for her, making her cum or anything. I blew that one, big time, I thought!" "Could it have been a dream?" I now wondered. "Could it have been a frigging dream? No way, it was too real, a cepjob, that's not even in my vocabulary!! Man, now my friends are coming over for the party tonight and Mary, the perfect, seductive female, won't be around. Man did I blow it!!!!" Just then I had a brainstorm. I called the number again, the one that got me in contact with Mary in the first place. The operator came on and in a recording said the number was disconnected or not in use. I was dreaming, I thought. this has been a total "wet" dream. I searched the house for signs of Mary, nothing. even the barbells were in place. I was convinced it was a dream. An odd, fantastic dream. "R_I__NNNNGGG," just then the phone rang. I ran to answer it hoping it was Mary. "Hi there," the voice said, "it's Beth! Beth was my cousin who lived in Santa Monica. "Hi Beth," I said, "what's up?" "Mind if I come to your birthday party tonight?" "No, come on over, but don't expect much of a party. Just a few friends are coming over," I explained, still wishing I hadn't blown it. "Well, I have a girlfriend who saw your picture and wants to meet you. Mind if I bring her?" Beth said. "Beth, I know your idea of a girlfriend for me," I said sarcastically. "What's she look like?" "Let's just say, proportionally perfect." My mouth dropped, my heart fainted, my everything did everything. "Hello, you there?" Beth yelled in my ear. "Yes Beth, I'm here. What's her name?" "Mary, and she wants to know what'ca want for your birthday? Hello, hello.........hel- looooooo!" ***Look for other SHORT STORIES from UNDERDOG***** (DONT FORGET, LOVE YOUR COMMENTS, GOOD OR EVIL) :) UNDERDOG