Three short stories about strong, powerful females
by M.C.



*Author's note:

As I'm virtually confined to my house because of the coronavirus restrictions,
I have plenty of free time on my hands; time I can use to write stories for
Diana's website. These short stories are a composite of many of the themes
that I have written about over the years. People who are familiar with them
will clearly see that I return to the same themes over and over again. What
can I say? I just find the idea of strong, powerful females so damn erotic. I
hope that to whomever is reading this that you and your loved ones are safe
and healthy. Eventually, this crisis will pass.

M.C.

Story Number 1 - The Party

Jennifer was depressed. Because her father is an important executive in a
large corporation that is expanding its business, he has to move around the
country every couple of years. This requires him and his family to uproot
themselves and move to a new location very often. Which means that every few
years Jennifer has to say 'good-bye' to of all the friends she made, move to a
different city, start a new school and live in a new neighborhood where she
won't have any friends at all. As she sat on the sofa in the living room of
her new home, Jennifer summed up her situation with just two simple words,
"moving sucks."

Just then there was a knock on the front door. "I wonder who that could be?"
she thought to herself. "We just moved into this house two days ago and we
don't know anybody here. It's probably just somebody who wants to sell us
something." As Jennifer was alone in the house - her father was already at
work and her mother was out shopping for groceries - Jennifer rose from the
sofa and went to answer the door.

"Hello, and welcome to the neighborhood," the girl at the door greeted
Jennifer after she opened it. "My name is Karen and I live right across the
street. May I come in?"

"Sure," Jennifer replied. She led her surprise guest in and the two girls sat
down on the sofa. "I know you're new here so I thought I'd come over and
introduce myself. What's your name?"

"Jennifer. That was very nice of you to come over and do this. I'm seventeen,
how old are you?"

"That's great! I'm seventeen too; and don't mention it. We moved into this
neighborhood four years ago and I can still remember what a pain in the ass it
was - new city, new school, new neighborhood, no friends. Moving sure sucks
doesn't it?"

Jennifer smiled. "That's exactly what I just said to myself Karen." The two
teenage girls then proceeded to chat for a while about the usual teenage stuff
- school, clothes, boys, movies etc.

Finally Karen looked at her watch. "Well I have to go now Jennifer. But it was
great talking to you. If you're free, I'm having a party over at my house this
Saturday evening. It's the last weekend before school begins so consider
yourself invited. All of my friends will be there and you'll get to meet them;
they're a really nice bunch. My parents will be away for the entire weekend
and you know what they say about when the cats go away (wink)."

"That's great Karen. Of course I'll be there. And thank you very much."

"Like I told you before Jennifer, don't mention it. Moving into a brand new
Neighborhood sucks big time. I still remember how it was when I did it."

Jennifer walked Karen to the door and they said their good-byes. Then she
returned to the sofa and thought, "WOW! Maybe things won't be so bad here
after all."

Saturday Night

Jennifer looked at herself in the full-length mirror in her bedroom. She
wanted to make sure that everything was exactly right. Her hair, her clothes,
her shoes, "After all," she said to herself, "you only get one chance to make
a first impression." Satisfied that everything was the way she wanted it to
be, Jennifer walked out of her house and went across the street to Karen's.

Karen greeted Jennifer at the door. She then led her inside and introduced
Jennifer to all of her friends. Being very vivacious by nature, Jennifer had
little trouble integrating herself into this new crowd; most of whom were
around her age.

Everyone seemed to be having a great time until the front door opened and a
very large boy entered Karen's home; then the music stopped and things
suddenly became very quiet. "So, you guys decided to have a party and you
didn't invite me huh?" he bellowed. "Well I decided to come anyway, so there."
From the sound of his voice it was obvious that he'd been drinking.

"Who is that boy?" Jennifer asked Karen.

"That's Bill Wilson. He's the star lineman of our high school football team
and the biggest bully in our school. Nobody likes him; that's why I didn't
invite him."

"He's totally ruined the atmosphere of your party Karen. Can't you just ask
him to leave?"

"Are you kidding Jennifer? Just look at the size of him. He's like six foot
four and must weigh at least 250 pounds. And they say that he's as strong as a
horse too. That's why he's so good at football. Nobody tells Bill to do
anything."

"Nobody you say? Hmmm. Perhaps I can persuade him to find another party to
crash and to leave us alone."

"You Jennifer? But you're just a girl. And look at how big he is. How do you
think that you can convince him to leave?"

Her question was met with a cryptic smile. "Oh I have my ways Karen. I can be
very persuasive if I want to be. Tell me, is there a spare room I can take him
to where we'll be alone so that he and I can have a little chat?"

"You can go into that room Jennifer (Karen pointed to a door on the other side
of the room where the party was taking place). We use it as a spare bedroom
when we have overnight guests. But there's hardly anything in it."

"That's great. It'll do just nicely for my purposes. This shouldn't take too
long. And then we can continue with our party." Jennifer walked over to where
Bill

was standing, flashed him a pretty smile and introduced herself. "Hello Bill,"
she began, "my name is Jennifer and I'm new in the neighborhood. I understand
that you're quite the football player. Well I really like football players.
Maybe you and I can go into that room (Jennifer pointed to the door) and talk
about football (wink)."

Bill looked down at the pretty girl standing before him that he literally
towered over (Jennifer stood five feet-six compared to his six feet-four) and
smiled. He was hoping to get some ass at the party tonight, but he was
pleasantly surprised that it came this easily. He didn't even have to work for
it. "Sure," he said. "Let's go." Jennifer led the large boy to the door,
opened it and Bill went inside. Before she too entered, Jennifer looked over
at Karen and winked; then she went inside.

Karen and her friends stood in absolute silence as they saw the door close
behind Jennifer. Then they heard the 'click' of the door being locked from the
inside. For about thirty seconds they couldn't hear any sound at all coming
from inside the room. And then, all of a sudden, they heard SMACK! POW! THUMP!
CRACK! WACKETY-WACKETY-WHAM! THUD! Everybody at the party looked at each other
and wondered, "what in the hell was Bill doing to Jennifer inside?" The
fighting sounds continued for about three minutes before everything became
quiet again. That silence lasted for two more minutes, and then they heard
SPANK! SPANK! SPANK! SPANK! SPANK! SPANK! SPANK! And after about two more
minutes of this, Karen and her friends started to hear what sounded like a boy
- crying!

Soon the crying sound subsided and it again became quiet inside. Karen and all
of her friends gazed at each other with nervous looks, but nobody dared to say
a word. Finally they heard another 'click', and as the door swung open; and
all the party goers gasped - for it was sight that they would remember for a
long, long time.

Jennifer was the first to emerge and she didn't have so much as a single mark
or scratch on her! Even her pretty hair didn't appear to be mussed! She
flashed everybody in the room a big smile. And as Jennifer walked out of the
room, she was literally dragging Bill by the collar of his shirt behind her.
Unlike Jennifer, Bill looked like he had been trampled on by a herd of
elephants. He had at least one black eye, a bloody nose, both sides on his jaw
appeared to be swelling up, and he probably had many more welts and bruises
over other parts of his body that weren't visible.

Jennifer dragged the battered 250 pound football star over to the front door.
When she noticed the shocked looks that Karen and her friends had on their
faces, Jennifer giggled and said, "What's the matter? Don't tell me that
you've never seen a girl beat up a big, strong, rough, tough football player
before; tee, hee, hee."

The pretty blond then forced Bill to stand up and in a soft but stern tone of
voice said, Billy (he hated to be called that), you've been a very naughty boy
tonight, haven't you?" When he didn't answer her, Jennifer's tone became more
forceful. "When I ask you a question Billy I expect to hear an answer. Were
you a naughty boy tonight?" SMACK! Jennifer slammed her right fist hard into
her left palm and the sound reverberated throughout the room.

"Yes," Bill said meekly.

"Yes what?" Billy.

"Yes, I've been a naughty boy."

"And did you learn your lesson here tonight? Not to be a bully and to stop
picking on kids that are smaller and weaker than you?"

"Yes Jennifer, I learned my lesson. I won't be a bully anymore."

"Good." Jennifer then opened the front door. "I want you to go home now Billy
and think about how you can become a better person. And tomorrow afternoon I'm
going to come over to your house and we're going to discuss it. And you'd
better be there when I arrive. Understand?"

"Yes Jennifer, I'll be there."

"Good. You can go home now Billy."

After Bill staggered out of Karen's house and Jennifer closed the front door,
she turned around to see all of her new friends still staring at her in shock
at what they had just witnessed. She smiled at them and said, "Well, what are
we waiting for? Let's get on with our party shall we? After all, the night is
still young." And so they did, for the rest of the night and well into the
following morning.

Story Number 2 - My Super Strong Wife Goes to the Beauty Parlor

"Mike honey, finish cleaning up the house and then when I get back from the
beauty parlor I'll help you set up the dinner table and get everything else
ready. I have an appointment with my favorite beautician Marge at two p.m. and
I don't want to be late. I want to look my very best for our dinner party this
evening."

"Sure thing Alice. I'll finish straightening up the house. What time should I
take the roast out of the oven."

"It should be taken out at three, but barring any unusual delays I should be
back before then." Before she left, my amazingly strong wife came into the
kitchen and gave me a monstrous hug and a playful peck on my cheek. A few
seconds later I heard her start up her car and drive away.

Both Alice and I work for a traveling circus, me as an accountant and she as
the circus strongwoman. She bills herself as "The Strongest Girl in the
World," (even though she's nearly thirty years old) but truth be known, she's
actually the strongest PERSON in the world - male or female. Nobody seems to
know how she acquired her tremendous strength, "I guess I just have good
genes," Alice says when anyone asks her; but it's really a mystery. She has
never lost an arm wrestling contest - with either arm - nor a wrestling match
to anyone. At six feet - three inches tall and tipping the scales at a
rock-solid 250 pounds, Alice may strike one as being a very intimidating
sight. But the truth is, she's the nicest, sweetest, most wonderful person
I've ever met; and I feel very fortunate call this marvelous woman my wife.

As our circus has closed down for the winter and we were now free until
springtime to relax and enjoy ourselves. So we decided to have a dinner party
tonight for all of our dearest friends. And as our guests will begin arriving
around five, I'd better stop talking to you and finish my chores.

Alice drove into the city and parked her car right in front of the beauty
parlor. Upon entering, she sat down at Marge's station. "Give my hair the
works Marge. My hubbie and I are having a big dinner engagement tonight and I
want to look my prettiest."

"Very well Alice; you got it."

Alice was happy to see that several of her girlfriends were also in the beauty
parlor at the same time, so they all engaged in some 'girl chat' while they
were getting their hair done. But while Alice and her friends were chatting
away at the beauty parlor, a dramatic and potentially catastrophic development
was taking place only a short distance away.

Several years ago a completely unknown and uncharted island was discovered by
a satellite in an isolated part of the South Pacific Ocean. When a team of
scientists arrived to explore it, they found, much to their great surprise, a
pristine and primeval world inhabited by, of all things, dinosaurs. "It was
like a real life version of Jurassic Park," one of the scientists described
it. "Nothing seems to have changed in 65 million years," another said (how
they managed to survive the massive K-T Mass Extinction remains a mystery to
this day).

Anxious to show their discovery off to the rest of the world, they managed to
anesthetize a large Tyrannosaurs Rex and bring him to the United States for
display. Because it was a very wealthy philanthropist that lives in our city
who sponsored their expedition to the island, it was decided that the T-Rex
would be placed in our zoo. A gigantic pit was dug to house him which was
called 'The Compound', and, not surprisingly, he quickly became a major
attraction.

When the zoo employees needed to clean the compound, the T-Rex was attracted
to another area by food and then cordoned off by a large gate which
electronically closed, thus not endangering the employees. Everything worked
well until one day a short circuit with the electric system caused the gate to
open while the workers were still inside the compound. Because they were still
inside, the main the gate where they entered from was also open. The huge
T-Rex burst through the open gate where he was being held, entered the main
compound area and, seeing that the main gate too was open, went through it
while the all the zoo employees ran for their lives. Free now, the ferocious
dinosaur trampled through the zoo before exiting completely and began to
terrorize the city.

"What do you think Alice?," Marge asked her as she turned the swivel chair
around to face the mirror so that Alice could view her new hair-do. "Marge,"
she said, "you are a true artist! It's beautiful! That's why I tell everybody
that you are my favorite beautician." Alice rose from the chair, paid the bill
(making sure that Marge received a very generous tip) and bid her girlfriends
good-by.

As she exited the beauty parlor Alice was greeted by a very strange sight -
literally dozens of people running towards her with looks of panic on their
faces. "Oh dear," she said to herself. "I wonder what could be going on." When
she asked one of the people who was running past her he screamed, "The
Tyrannosaurs Rex has escaped from the zoo and is terrorizing the city and he's
coming this way! Run for your life!"

Just then Alice saw the enormous dinosaur approaching from the other end of
the street coming in her direction. "Hmmm, we can't have him running all over
the city scaring people now can we?" Then she sighed, "It looks like I'm going
to have to doing something about him. I just hope that I don't get my pretty
new-hair-do mussed." Alice walked over to her car and placed her purse on the
hood. She opened it and took out a small mirror which she put in her shirt
pocket and her hairbrush which she put into the back pocket of her pants.
Leaving her purse on the hood, and without showing even the slightest trace of
fear, Alice stepped out into the middle of the street and prepared to confront
the ferocious, eighteen foot tall, ten ton beast that was now bearing down on
her.

"Now listen to me Mr. Dinosaur," Alice began when he closed in on her, "I
simply can't allow you to roam free around the city and scaring people, it's
not nice. So, we can either do this the easy way, or the hard way - the choice
is yours. But one way or another, you're going back to your compound in the
zoo." The huge beast then let out a loud, blood-curdling ROAR! that could be
heard for miles around. Alice sighed again. "O.K. big boy, I guess that means
that you want to do this the hard way." Alice then rolled up the sleeves of
her shirt and added, "But don't say that I didn't warn you."

Ten minutes later the enormous Tyrannosaurs Rex was lying unconscious on his
back in the middle of the street. Many of his teeth had been knocked out and
he must have had at least a dozen perforations roughly the size of a human
fist all over his body. Alice was calmly sitting on the underside of his neck,
straddling it with her muscular legs - and she didn't appear to have so much
as a single mark or scratch on her!

The mighty woman reached into her shirt pocket, took out her mirror and
examined herself. "It's a good thing for you that you didn't manage to mess up
my pretty new hair-do Mr. Dinosaur; or else I'd be totally pissed off at you -
and trust me, that's something you really don't want to see." Alice then
reached into her pants pocket, took out her hairbrush and began to brush back
the few strands of her hair that were out of place. "There," she said when she
had finished, "good as new."

Off in the distance Alice heard police sirens approaching. Looking in the
direction of where the sounds were coming from, she also saw a large, flatbed
truck with a crane attached to it approaching with the police. "Good. Now I
won't have to hang around here waiting for them to arrive," she said as she
slid off the still unconscious beast. "Let this be a lesson to you tough guy,
if you don't want to go through this all over again, then I suggest you be
smart and stay in your compound where you belong. Because the next time I
might not be quite so gentle with you." Satisfied that the T-Rex would remain
unconscious for a while, Alice walked back to her car, put her mirror and
hairbrush back into her purse and drove home.

I was setting the large dining room table when I heard Alice pull up into the
driveway. Then I heard the front door open and close. "Oh honey," my large,
strong and gorgeous wife said when she entered the dining room, "you didn't
have to start setting the table yet. I told you I'd come and help you."

"Well I finished cleaning up the house so I thought I might as well start
setting the table. "Your hair looks absolutely beautiful by-the-way."

"Thank you Mike; you're the sweetest thing. Yes that Marge is a master
beautician." Alice gave me another mammoth hug followed by a long and
passionate kiss. "I see it's just about time to take the roast out of the
oven. I told you that I'd make it back in time honey."

"How was the beauty parlor? Did you see your friends there?"

"Yes I did, and we had a great little chit-chat while we were all getting our
hair done."

"Did anything unusual happen?"

"No, not at all. It was a typical visit to the beauty parlor."

"Then why are you giggling Alice?"

"Oh, it's nothing really. I guess I'm just in a good mood in anticipation
about our upcoming dinner party, that's all. I have an idea Mike. After I take
the roast out of the oven, what say you take a break from your chores, open
one of the bottles of that white wine that you bought for our party and let's
each have a glass? Then we can finish setting the table together, just as a
husband and wife should."

Later that Evening

It was nearly eleven o'clock and, after our very successful dinner party, all
of the guests had gone home. Alice and I were lying next to each other in the
bed with our heads propped up by pillows. I reached over, took the remote
control and turned on the large, high-definition T.V. that was on the wall
opposite our bed. "I've been so busy today that I didn't hear any news at all.
Do you know if anything special happened today Alice?"

"Hmmm, not that I know of Mike (grin)."

Just then the news came on: "We open tonight's program with an incredible
story," the newscaster began. "The ferocious Tyrannosaurs Rex that had escaped
from the zoo earlier this afternoon has been successfully returned to his
compound. Miraculously, not a single person was injured in what could easily
have been a catastrophic situation."

"Thank God for that," Alice said. "That could have been very, very bad."

"But perhaps the most amazing thing about the incident," the announcer
continued, "was that when the authorities found the huge creature, he was
lying unconscious, right in the middle of Maple Street."

"Isn't that where the beauty parlor that you go to is located Alice?"

"Hmmm, maybe honey. Let's listen some more."

"Not only was the dreaded beast unconscious, but many of his teeth had been
knocked out. And in addition to that, he had at least fifteen perforations
located all over his body about the size of a human fist. Since
paleontologists consider the Tyrannosaurs Rex to be one of the most ferocious
creatures ever to have walked the Earth - if not the most ferocious -
authorities are at a complete loss to explain who, or what, could have
possibly done this to him (Alice suddenly began to giggle again). But in any
case, the people of this city own a great debt of gratitude to whoever, or
whatever, stopped this monster cold. This could very well have resulted in an
unmitigated disaster if."

Alice reached over, took the remote control from my hand and turned off the
T.V. Then she put it down on 'her' side of the bed. She was still giggling.

"What's gotten into you tonight Alice? Your acting so giddy all of a sudden."

"It must be the wine I drank tonight honey. You know how it affects me. Now,
enough about dinosaurs. We just had a very successful dinner party for all of
our best friends and I'm in a very sexy mood. So what do you say we make love
to each other now and we can talk about dinosaurs tomorrow." And that's
exactly what we did.

Breakfast the Following Morning

Alice and I sat down at the kitchen table and we began to eat the delicious
pancakes that she had just made (did I mention that, in addition to Alice
being the strongest person in the world, she's also a gourmet cook? Well she
is). Suddenly Alice got serious. "Honey, I have to confess that I wasn't
entirely honest with you yesterday. It was never my intention to deceive you,
but I just felt that if I had told you about this yesterday, it would probably
have changed the whole nature of everything else that we were going to do -
especially our dinner party. And that's the last thing that I wanted to have
happen."

"What are you referring to Alice?"

"You were correct Mike. My beauty parlor is located on Maple Street where the
battered and unconscious Tyrannosaurs Rex was found. In fact, he was lying
right in front of it. The reason that I know this is because I'm the one who
beat him up. That's why I was giggling during the newscast last night. But I
didn't want to tell you then either because it might have interfered with the
great sex we had. So I decided to wait until now to tell you. I hope that
you're not angry with me for deceiving you yesterday."

It took me several minutes to come to terms with what this incredible wife of
mine just told me. I mean I knew that Alice was strong, immensely strong; but
beating up a fierce, gigantic Tyrannosaurs Rex with just her bare hands?

That might take a bit of time for me to come to terms with. At length I said,
"Alice, the last thing that I want to do is be angry with a woman who can beat
up a Tyrannosaurs Rex - the fiercest creature ever to have walked the Earth. I
mean do I look suicidal to you?"

Alice began to laugh when I said this, just as I was hoping she would. The
tension broken, my awesome wife got up, walked around to my side of the table
and lifted me up in her powerful arms. Oh Mikie, you're such a sweetie pie.
That's why I love you so much; tee, hee, hee."

"So Mrs. Super wife, what was it like to fight the ferocious Tyrannosaurs Rex
with just your bare hands? They call him 'The King of the Dinosaurs' you
know."

"Oh he really wasn't so tough honey. In my opinion, the T-Rex is vastly
overrated." Then she snuggled me. "Come honey, let's get back into bed. I'm in
a sexy mood again." Giggling like a little girl, this unbelievable woman
carried me into our bedroom where we didn't come out until the following
morning.

Story Number Three - The Sheriff: A short story from the Wild West

I was standing behind my large, powerfully built wife and brushing her long,
beautiful brown hair; one of my favorite chores. She was sitting behind the
desk in her sheriff's office. Yes, you heard that right; HER sheriff's office
as she's the sheriff of Dry Gulch. Located in the Arizona Territory (Arizona
wouldn't become a state until 1912, this story takes place in 1875) each
territory was responsible for policing its own towns; usually with a sheriff
and Dry Gulch was no different. But before I continue I should share with you
a little bit of background information.

Jane - my wife - has always been a tough, rugged woman. Born and raised on a
farm in Indiana, she worked very hard from dawn until dusk and, as a result of
that (plus her massive six foot-four inch, 220 pound frame) she grew up to be
strong; very strong in fact. Me, on the other hand, had studied law and was,
in comparison to her, very much the weaker one in our relationship. But that
didn't stop us from falling madly in love with one another and marrying.

One day Jane came up to me and said, "Joe honey, I'm tired of working my farm
(Jane Inherited the farm after both of her parents had passed away). Somebody
offered me a very good price for this land and I think we should take it."

"But where would we go Jane? And what would we do?"

"You're a lawyer Joe, and you can get a job practically anywhere we go. And as
for me (Jane flashed me a strange smile), I've heard that there's a town in
the Arizona Territory that's looking for a sheriff. It seems that it's a
rather rowdy place and nobody that they've hired so far has been able to bring
law and order to it. So I think that I might be just the girl there looking
for."

"You want to be a sheriff in a town in the 'Wild West' Jane? Do you even know
what that involves? I mean, I've seen you practicing with your guns and, I
have to admit, you have a very fast draw and you're also incredibly strong and
tough. But a sheriff?"

"Joe, I've been working on this farm from dawn to dusk for as long as I can
remember, and there has been absolutely no break in my daily routine. Get up
early in the morning every day and work hard until dusk. In fact meeting and
marrying you was the only break I've ever had in that monotony. You also told
me that you were bored living here too; right?" I nodded. "So now we both have
a chance to get out and explore the world and do something different and
exciting for once. And if we don't take advantage of it now, we may never have
this opportunity again. So Joe honey, what do you say?"

Even though I'm a lawyer (and not a bad one either I have to admit) I found
Jane's argument to be unassailable. So we sold the farm, packed up all of our
things that we could fit into a covered wagon and headed out for our new life
in the 'Wild West'.

At first the citizens of Dry Gulch were very reluctant to hire a woman
sheriff. But as they were desperate to bring law and order to their town, and
nobody else seemed to be able to get the job done, they decided to take a
chance on

Jane - and it was the wisest decision that they ever made. For with her mighty
fists and lightning fast draw, my incredible wife soon succeeded in removing
(in one way or another) all of the bad elements that had been harassing the
citizens of Dry Gulch. In short, Jane singlehandedly brought law and order to
our new home. But from time to time she still had to deal with certain rowdy
elements who failed to get the message - like this evening for example.

As I was brushing Jane's hair we couldn't help but hear the loud ruckus that
was coming from the saloon down the street. "Must be those cowboys I saw ride
into town earlier," Jane said. Then she looked up at the clock on the wall and
sighed. "It a quarter past eleven. It looks like I'm going to have a little
bit of work to do tonight sweetie pie."

In Dry Gulch there is a town ordinance (a local law) that says that you can
not make loud noises after eleven p.m. in the middle of the week. Since this
was a Wednesday, the cowboys were in clear violation of it. And as sheriff,
Jane felt that it was therefore her responsibility to see that the laws of the
town were enforced. So my large, strong wife rose from the chair and began to
prepare herself for what in all likelihood would result in a confrontation.

Jane strapped on her gun belt which holstered her two six-guns. Although she
loathed having to use them (Jane much preferred to settle things with her
fists as it's far less messy that way), she knew that they might be necessary
and she'd be remiss not to bring them with her. Ready now, Jane and I headed
out the door of her sheriff's office and made our way over to the saloon where
the loud ruckus was continued unabated.

Just before we were about to enter though, Jane paused, looked at me and said
with a smile, "I think it would be better if you waited out here honey. I know
how much you like to see me in action but things might get a bit rough in
there and I wouldn't want to see my honey bunny to get hurt. And please stay
away from the doors; you might get hit by flying cowboys."

"Flying cowboys? What on earth do you mean by that Jane?"

My large, powerful wife reached over and playfully pinched my cheek. "You'll
see honey." Then she walked over to the two swinging doors and went inside. As
soon as Jane entered the saloon it became quiet, deathly quiet. The silence
lasted for perhaps a half a minute, and then I heard WHAM! SMASH! CRACK! POW!
THUMP! The swivel doors flung open and I saw a large cowboy fly out of the
saloon and landed, unconscious, in the street (boy, Jane wasn't kidding about
the flying cowboys was she). He was soon joined by a second, and then a third.
POW! SLAM! CRACK! BASH! CRUNCH! Two more cowboys now joined the pile of
battered, unconscious men in the street.

Despite Jane's warning, I was tempted to look inside and see what was going on
- I just love to watch my incredible wife in action. But just as I approached
the entrance to the saloon WHAM! Another battered cowboy came flying out.
"Honey, I asked you to stay away from the doors; didn't I? PUNCH! WHAM! (two
more cowboys now joined the ever growing pile on the street). So please do as
I asked sweetie pie. I really don't want you to get hurt. And I'm almost
finished in here anyway."

I could now hear a cowboy's voice pleading with Jane, "Please don't hit me.
I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. Don't hit me. Please." CRACK! Then he too came
flying out and landed on the pile. And everything inside the saloon became
quiet again.

A few seconds later the saloon doors swung opened and Jane walked out,
dragging the last of the battered cowboys with her by the collar of his shirt.
She casually tossed him on the pile and then flashed me a pretty smile. The
first thing I noticed as Jane approached me was that she didn't have a single
mark or scratch on her; not even one! In fact her beautiful hair wasn't even
mussed. It looked exactly the way it did when I finished brushing it not
fifteen minutes earlier!

"You naughty boy you," she said in mock sternness. "I told you to stay away
from the front doors. You might have gotten hurt honey, and then I would have
never been able to forgive myself."

I put my head down. "I'm sorry Jane. It's just that I so wanted to see you in
action. You're so magnificent. You just beat up ten large, tough cowboys and
didn't even get your hair mussed. I'm sorry I disobeyed you. I promise I won't
do it again."

Jane took me by the hand, gave it a gentle squeeze and softly said, "That's
O.K. I know you meant well. It's just that I love you so much that I wouldn't
want anything bad to happen to you." Jane and I then looked over at the pile
of battered and unconscious cowboys. "I don't think they'll be bothering us
anymore tonight sweetie pie." Then she giggled and added, "I put them all to
beddie-by; tee, hee, hee. Come honey, let's go home in cuddle in bed. After
all, there's nothing like beating up a gang of rough, tough cowboys to put a
girl in a sexy mood (more giggles)." Still holding me by the hand, Jane began
to lead me down the street and towards our home.