Sister Mary : Disciple of St. Hilda
by M.C.



Thanks to the efforts of my distinguished colleague, Professor Corp(Captain),
much is now known about the life of St. Hilda. Somewhat less well known,
however, is how her desciples helped spread the word throughout the Kingdom.
Due to a fortuitious accident I have acquired an ancient manuscript which
helps shed some light on this interesting subject. Several years ago an old,
delapidated farmhouse was being demolished. As the bulldozers plowed through
the rubble, an alert workman noticed what appeared to be an old book of some
sort. A quick glance revealed that the work was written in Old English (of
which all construction workers are well versed). The manuscript was sent to my
university for analysis and, after several laborious years of study, I have
pieced together the life of one of St. Hilda's disciples, a certain Sister
Mary. It is her exploits that this manuscript chronicles.

As St. Hilda became aware of her mortality, she gathered her disciples around
her and encouraged them to go forth and spread the gosple, using her unique
methods to persuade the uninitiated to see the error of their ways. One of her
most loyal followers, a certain Sister Mary, immediately took up the call.
After bidding her mentor a tearful farewell she headed off in search of a
monestary of her own from which she could "spread the gosple" according to St.
Hilda. After many weeks of travel, Sister Mary came to a small town in the
northern part of the country and was so taken by its beauty that she decided
to remain there and minister to the local townfolk.

Unknown to Sister Mary at the time was that this town was ruled by a cruel
Baron who, along with his gang of henchmen, terrorized the local population
through threats and violence. Nobody was safe from their avarice as they
extorted money and land from everyone in the area. The town and the
surrounding area had been given to the Baron's family several generations
before by the King as a favor for services performed " to the crown ". The
family ruled wisely at first until the current Baron inherited it. He quickly
reversed that trend by hiring local thugs to brutally intimidate the
hardworking farmers and shopkeepers. By extorting money and other "favors",
the Baron became rather wealthy. The more he got, though, the more he wanted.
His lust for wealth was insatiable and many a good citizen of the town felt
his wrath. It was into this environment that Sister Mary entered.

Upon her arrival, Sister Mary used what little money she had (mostly acquired
through alms she recieved during her journey) to purchase an abandoned
farmhouse just outside of town. She quickly set up shop and began circulating
throughout the town, inviting the people to Sunday Mass; the first held in the
town in years - since the Baron had driven the former cleric out for daring to
criticize him. Attendance was small. After the service, Mary cornered one of
the farmers, a large man with rough features, and asked him why so few people
were in attendance. At first reluctant to talk about it, he eventually opened
up (being held by one foot, dangling from the roof of a farmhouse will do that
to you). He explained to the kindly nun about the ruthless Baron and his gang,
and how the people had given up any hope of a better life. Mary smiled as she
gently lowered him to the roof. " I see that the good Lord has directed me to
the proper place ", she said. " It looks like I have some work to do ".

The next day, Sister Mary made her way to the castle overlooking the town. As
she entered the Baron 's residence, she couldn't help but notice the opulence
that surrounded her; and how it contrasted with the poverty of the farmers and
townspeople. " I'm here to see the Baron ", she said to several large men who
confronted her. The Baron was summoned and soon arrived before the humble nun.
" I noticed you and your friends weren't at Mass yesterday . I know you must
be a very busy man so I'd like to invite you to a 'special' service...just for
you ". Neither the Baron nor his men were religious, but he did understand the
value of appearing to be. If he could be seen to recieve the blessings of this
humble servent of God, then it would be much easier for him to justify his
treatment of his subjects. " My men and I will be at your farmhouse tomorrow
at noon ", he replied. Sister Mary smiled, "it will be a service you will
never forget ".

The next day, at exactly noon, the Baron and his six henchmen road up to the
farmhouse; Mary met them at the enterance. " God does not appreciate weapons
of war in 'his' house ", she said, pointing to their swords. Please leave them
outside the door ". As they were seven large, strong men and she was a simple
nun, they saw no problem with that. After removing their swords, they entered
the house. Sister Mary led then into a large windowless room that had been
used for storing grain when the farm had been in use. There was a huge wooden
door that must have weighed several hundred pounds; Mary had little difficulty
opening it by herself. She led them inside. When they all entered Sister Mary
removed the top part of her nun uniform, revealing - for the first time - her
massive 19 - inch biceps. As the Baron and his men stood and stared at this
surprisingly muscular woman, Mary smiled and said, " gentlemen, the good Lord
has instructed me to show you the error of your ways ".

The Baron and his men weren't seen around the town for the next few days. For
the first time in a long time, the townspeople could traverse the streets
without the fear of one of of them on horse - back arrogently pushing them
aside. Nobody seemed to know what had happened to them, they just assumed that
they had all gone away for a little while and would soon return. People who
ventured near Sister Mary 's farmhouse reported hearing strange sounds coming
from inside. " Whack, Smash, Pow, Slam....." followed by what can only be
described as a wining sound; some even thought it sounded a bit like crying. "
It must be the wind ", people said to themselves. But there wasn't any
wind...very strange indeed. This went on for several days.

On Saturday, market day, Sister Mary appearded before the entire town and
invited them to Mass the following day. " This will give you hardworking
people proof of the power and glory of the Lord ", she extolled. The next day
several hundred people, almost the entire population of the area, crowded
around Sister Mary 's farmhouse. As the humble nun stood before her makeshift
podium she began, " good people, you have worked long and hard for meaning in
your life. But there were evil elements among you that sought to destroy all
that you strived for. Now witness the power of redemption ". Sister Mary moved
towards the huge door of the storage room and, seemingly without effort,
opened it . " Come on out boys, it's time to atone for your sins ". There
were gasps throughout the crowd as the Baron - barely recognizable - and his
henchmen emerged from the storageroom. Each looked like he'd personally gone
through all the levels of Dante's hell and - in a way - they had. One by one,
Sister Mary "invited " them to the podium to publically confess to their
crimes and beg forgiveness from the people they had brutalized for so long. As
much as the people despised them, the sight of these once feared men, now
reduced to wimpering shells of their former selves, elicted nothing but pity
from the townspeople. As the Baron walked (limped actually) up to beg
forgiveness, he broke down and cried; never again would these men terrorize
the people of this area. God, through the mighty hand of Sister Mary and the
philosophy of St. Hilda, had shown them the light.

When the confessions had been completed, Sister Mary spoke, " Good people, you
have seen what the power of strength and discipline - tempered with love - can
achieve, such is the wisdom of the Lord as revealed by St. Hilda. These men,
once your tormentors are now you servants. The good Baron has graciously
agreed to return all the money he took from you...isn't that right Baron ? "
She looked at him sternly , whereupon he meekly replyed, "yes ". A large cheer
went up from the audience. " Furthermore, the Baron and his men have decided
to divest themselves of all their worldly possessions and devote themselves to
the service of the Lord ". Another loud cheer. Mary continued," we wish them
all the best in their quest for spiritual salvation ". As the seven broken men
slowly mounted their hourses, an erie scilence came over the people gathered
there. They watched them ride off, never to be seen again. " Well then, let's
sing praises to the Lord for our deliverance ", Sister Mary said...and they
did.

After the Mass, several young women approached Sister Mary. " Sister, we'd
like you to teach us how to be strong like you " they said. " The life of a
St. Hilda nun is an arduous one, the hours long, the training difficult ", she
responded. Undeterred, they persisted until finally Sister Mary agreed to
accept them on a trial basis. Thus was laid the foundations for the second
chapter of the St. Hilda nuns...and it's here that the manuscript ends.