A Real Fantasy by Marknew marknew742@aol.com Like all of us, John has a way of dealing with the disconnect between his fantasies and reality. Reality gets in the way. 1 -- August -- Year 1 John's eyes were tightly closed. Even so, in his head, he could clearly see the huge, dominant muscles of his girlfriend Stacy looming over him. How did she ever get so large, so strong? He had always been a jock and considered himself a strong man, yet compared to her he was such a weakling. Her muscles were so big and hard, bulging out of her arms even when she was completely relaxed. Just the idea of her strength, her powerful body, thrilled him to his core. Still, he struggled with her, trying to free even one hand from her iron grip. His mind's eye could see her grinning lazily, hardly even exerting herself, while her arousal grew as she wrapped her legs around him, crushing him against her, pushing her crotch against him ever more tightly to stimulate herself. Her passion excited him even though the pressure was slightly uncomfortable, even painful. But he didn't dare protest or struggle too much. That would just excite her even more, and, as ever, the hotter she was, the harder she pressed. She made a happy grunt. "That's right, little boy. You're not going anywhere. You just keep yourself good and hard for me. As if you could do anything else!" She giggled and then laughed. "Please, Stacy! You're being so rough with me!" he pleaded. He was sure she was still using just a fraction of her strength. He had never actually seen her tax her muscles as hard as she could, and the image of her muscles straining to their utmost almost sent him over the edge. He struggled to keep control. "Why do you have to hold me so tightly?" "Why? Because I can! Because being a girl with such super-muscles is thrilling to me too!" She gasped. "Oh, John! Yes! YES!! UMMM, just, uh, knowing I could ... make you do ANYTHING I, uh, WANTED you to makes me ... so hot!!" John could feel her grip on his hands loosening as her pussy clenched his dick tighter. She was coming. Her contractions squeezed him again and again. "Stacy!" he cried. When she came all her muscles simply exploded in size. She could rip him apart if she wasn't careful. If he was unlucky she would -- "Oh John! Sorry! I can't ..." She let go and slumped against him. "But Stacy!" "I just can't, John. I get too tired!" She wrapped her arms around him and kissed him. "Oh John, I really do love you! You DO love me, don't you? The real me?" He opened his eyes. It was she who was pleading now. He put his arms around her. "Of course I do." "John, you know I'd do ANYTHING for you, don't you?" She moved her head down to his cock and began sucking it, her lips squeezing him and then her head started moving up and down, faster and faster. She was a lovely, sexy woman, with shining black hair, a large round bosom which bounced as she moved and a lovely firm ass. And her arms ... her thin arms with no sign of muscle. Well, hardly any at all. He tried again to imagine her as he just had, but the spell was broken. Even so, she was so good at giving head it took only another twenty seconds before he came into her mouth. She swallowed every drop, then crawled up to lie next to him, her head on his shoulder, her eyes looking lovingly into his. "My poor darling. You're so strong yourself. It's so funny that you fantasize about a woman being even stronger than you are." "Yeah, well, I know it's kind of weird." "Don't be like that. I don't mind, really. I'd do anything to make you happy, darling. Anything in my power. It's just hard sometimes to be rough with you. I have to try so hard." She quickly added, but it's really fun too. I like pretending with you." She kissed his shoulder and then planted kisses all the way up to his mouth and then down his arm. "But just LOOK at this big muscle YOU have. And you really like to imagine ME with even BIGGER ones?!" She screwed up her face. She didn't really believe or understand it. He shrugged. "It's just a fantasy, I guess. A silly fantasy." He pulled her onto him and mouthed her breasts, playing with them. She laughed. "Ooooh, they're so sensitive! You're going to make me horny all over again!" For a moment she looked at him longingly. "But I can't! I have to go meet Jeannie!" "That's ok. I guess I should get up too. I have to finish this proposal for a client." Still holding her he lifted them both out of bed and stood up, holding her so that her head was higher than his. "See! You really do like being strong, don't you? You like being able to carry me around like that." Now she curled her body against him, dropping her head back onto his shoulder. "I know I like it. I love you, John. And I really love your body. I really, really do." He let her slip down a bit and tickle his cock, which was already getting hard again. "And I love 'little' John too!" She held him, hugging him as tightly as her strength allowed, which wasn't that much, although he appreciated the thought. "Ooooh, you!" she said and then slipped out of his hands and into the bathroom for a quick shower. 2 John sighed. He had showered but hadn't bothered to put on anything more than his shorts. He sat down at his computer and worked through the MeGaCo presentation he had scheduled later in the week. Although he could fiddle with it for hours the truth was it already was pretty good. He sold this particular client several jobs before and his credibility was high. The only issue was the budget. He had shaved as many costs as he could, but was he still pitching it too high? He looked over his presentation and sighed, knowing that to close the deal he would have to make more concessions. But he had made enough for now. He opened his browser and checked his stocks. That French biotech stock was still rocketing! Good. He wished he'd bought more. Then his fingers guided the mouse to his special folder, buried deep in the computer section -- where Stacy never strayed. He scanned the list of sites: Pictures, stories, videos, chat, live sessions. What would it be? He hadn't checked into Lingster's blog lately, but a quick scan revealed that neither had Lingster. There was nothing new on Zawaa's latest group, and he would be lucky to be able to download anything from there anyway, with the ever shrinking caps Yahoo was placing on bandwidth usage. He switched to the pay sites and sighed happily. That Cindy Phillips on Fistman was so cute, but she had real muscles too. Not just 'fitness' muscles but arms with real bulges, round muscles that looked down menacingly from above the plane of the rest of her upper arms, instead of rising in lines along them. Oh there was nothing 'wrong' with fitness muscles. But nothing particularly exciting either. He quickly saved the pictures to his hard drive, created a slide show and then flipped through them. Beautiful! If only Stacy were that muscular. But no, even that wouldn't satisfy him. He would want her even bigger, even stronger. It was an impossible fantasy, but one that he couldn't -- no, wouldn't -- give up. His cock nodded in agreement. 3 The next evening Stacy came home almost two hours later than usual. John had been busy with his final rehearsal for the presentation -- only occasionally interrupting his work with some recreational surfing -- so the truth was he didn't mind that much. Her hours as a secretary were usually much shorter than his, leaving her time for shopping and with her friends without interfering with his work and some free time. But with his increasingly frequent forays deep into Diana's site, his sexual tension was building. Where was she?! He was about to snap at her for not calling when he noticed her red face and her heavy lidded eyes. "Stacy, are you all right?" he asked instead. She nodded and smiled, then slumped onto the couch. "I am so beat!" "You're so late! You could have called," he said, more gently than he would have, feeling a bit sorry for her, and not wanting to spoil the chance for some fun later. "I know, but once I started -- I was at the gym. Your gym. I joined today. They had a special -- six months for the price of three -- and they gave me one of those personal assessments. It took so long! And then he had to show me how to use everything and how much weight to use. I can't believe he made me work so hard on my first day." She closed her eyes and leaned back on the cushion, but a wave of pain crossed her face and she straightened slightly. "That Gustaf -- he's a real slave driver! But I guess it's good for me." "You got Gustaf? He's a real prick, you know. I bet he had his hands all over you." Stacy blushed. "Well, uh, yeah. He said he had to show me how to, you know, lift, and he couldn't tell if I was doing it right without, uh, feeling how my muscles moved." She was blushing very red now. "He said he was, you know, a professional, like a doctor," she added more quietly, "and that I shouldn't take it the wrong way." John was boiling mad. Stacy burst into tears. "Don't be angry with me. I was doing it all for you, you know? I would do anything to be attractive to you." How could John stay angry? "But Stacy," he started, "I could have shown you the machines, the techniques. I know as much as -- more than Gustaf." Stacy nodded. "I know you do, darling. Of course you do. But they were running a special today, and I'd woken up today and decided THIS would be the day. I didn't want to wait even a moment so that I wouldn't change my mind. I want to make my body into exactly what you think is beautiful. So we won't have to pretend. So you won't have to close your eyes when we make love ... and imagine somebody else with bigger muscles than I have." She sniffed, trying to hold her tears back. "Stacy!" "Ssshh! I know you do it. Don't apologize, John. It ... makes it worse." She sniffed back her tears. "I know you love me. I know you have this ... interest. This ... this is the way I'm dealing with it. I'm being positive, right? I know I'm not a superjock or anything, but I can work hard. I can get stronger I can have muscles too. Anyone can if they try hard enough, right? And I'll try as hard as I have to. THAT's how much I love you!" John took her in his arms and held her. She leaned on him and kissed him, her tears wetting his cheek, but when he started to take things further she pulled back. "I ... I think I'm still a little too sore, honey. Maybe tomorrow I'll feel better." She looked up at him apologetically and then walked carefully upstairs. John could hear water running for her bath and when he knew she had settled into it he shut the door and returned to his computer. Stacy would be in a long time. He hadn't read The Librarian lately. (When would the Power Company come out with their new "epic" story anyway?) It was a long story and a lot to read before he'd get to his favorite scene, the one where the guy who has taken the muscle-growing drug is tied up by his sister, and by swallowing his cum, she and her friends get many times the benefit he does. He never failed to get off on that one, and from the way Stacy looked he knew he'd have plenty of time. 4 -- February -- Year 2 Unlike most people taking advantage of discounted gym memberships, Stacy stuck to her new regime. In fact, she was unusual in her discipline and enthusiasm, her determination to do each exercise in the right way and neither to increase weights too rapidly nor overdo her repetitions -- the typical mistakes made by most of those who failed to drop out. Steadily, Stacy began to sculpt her body. Her already trim waist shrank and became firmer, with the outlines of muscle starting to show. Her slender arms lost their softness. If anything, her forearms and upper arms looked smaller as layers of normal feminine fat melted away, but when she moved them, to gesture in conversation or to fix her hair, the workings of her strengthening muscles were visible beneath and the slight, but budding curves of new biceps peeked out upwards. Stacy felt good too. After her body became accustomed to the routine her energy levels started to increase. Her need for sleep surprisingly lessened. For years she had needed eight and a half, sometimes nine hours. John often had an extra hour on either end of the night to watch television or surf the internet while she dozed. Now she could stay up as late as he and when she felt him stir in the early morning, as often as not she could rouse herself, roll toward him and hang a leg over his, saying "Just a sec, honey. Instead of that computer, I got a better idea." And then they would make love. His hard body felt so good for her. Her appetite for sex and particularly for him was growing as her conditioning improved. John seemed to approve of her work. Several times they would go to the gym together and he always had pointers for her about improving her form. His being there also motivated her to do just a little bit more. The results of her training were so obvious already. It was just a matter of time before she might even have real biceps, a real "six-pack," and a back that would show muscle instead of just smooth soft skin. Already he seemed impressed by how much she was lifting, how quickly she was gaining strength and muscle and how hard she worked. Yet ... yet ... he STILL closed his eyes when they made love. He still wanted her to pretend she was dominating him with her strength. She didn't mind it THAT much. He was kind and steady and was an exciting and thoughtful lover. He was consistently with her, and after all, he had an excellent job and would, if she played her cards right, someday be an excellent husband and father. Besides, with her new strength the games he wanted to play were becoming easier for her to do. Still, she wondered why it was still necessary to play them. She had some muscles now. They were getting harder, and they were growing. Why wasn't that ENOUGH for him? Men could be so funny. Everyone thought women were so mysterious, so illogical, but it was really men you could never really figure out, never REALLY understand. Why did he want the fantasy when the reality was right there for him? And the real girl loved him SO much. Why didn't he get it? So many exciting things were happening for her. At work, she'd gotten a transfer to the IT department. It was a bit of a promotion; she would be working for a VP there who was a very impressive female executive, as well as the three directors reporting to the VP, and she'd be getting new computer training so that she would understand more of what the department did. John always got annoyed at her for having to answer basic questions on how to do things on his home computer; soon she would know enough that she wouldn't have to ask him. All Stacy's friends and everything she read in magazines told her that people didn't really change for the sake of their relationships. Well, she was going to prove them wrong! She knew she had a good man. She thought that he loved her, that he really loved her. It was up to her to prove to him that she was the girl of his dreams. And she felt that she was already almost there! She just hoped John would notice all these changes and appreciate how much effort she was making for him. John did notice. He was flattered that Stacy took his needs so seriously, but that fact also made him more than a little worried. It was not only the commitment she was bringing to their relationship. A woman's commitment could be a dangerous thing. But also, in part, he had always seen the gym as time for himself. Now she spent more time there than he did, and some people there were starting to refer to him as Stacy's boyfriend, instead of the other way around. Imagine! He was getting kidded too. Gustaf joked at least once a week that if John didn't work twice as hard, Stacy would end up being the one with the bigger muscles! At his quarterly fitness assessment one of the other trainers showed him his rate of improvement and, to motivate him, plotted Stacy's against his, showing how sometime in late 2004 she would surpass him. When John got angry, the trainer backed off, saying it was just a joke. Well of course it was. Stacy's improvement was typical for someone who had never done any training before. Her rate of improvement would level off soon enough, and then, like most females, she would gain strength and muscle more slowly than a male, especially one with John's genetic gifts. Not that John objected to Stacy's gym work. How could he, with the fantasy games he played with her? And he did still enjoy them. She was the first girl he'd dated that he had told about his fantasies, perhaps because she was just a secretary and he didn't find her the least bit threatening. With her added strength and conditioning she was getting better at playing them too. But her developing real muscle now was changing the dynamic between into something he no longer completely controlled and, in a way, feeling her real muscles, small as they were, somehow intruded on the fantasy images he kept in his mind, almost as though her reality was starting to overpower his fantasy. In a funny way that he neither fully understood or in truth, was even aware of, that felt like a threat. Not that he would ever admit that as a possibility, even to himself. After all, the very idea that Stacy could threaten him, or even challenge him, was absurd. He was a successful consultant, earning several hundred thousand a year, while she was just a secretary, even with this new promotion she was so excited about. And what was the big deal? Didn't she understand that IT was a backwater in just about every company, and that, knowing nothing about the area, she could never expect to be promoted in that department? And physically, for all the pretending, he knew that he was and always would be far, far stronger than she. He has been working out since high school, with some breaks, true, during busy times at school or work, and then for one five-month period when he was so besotted with a girl at college that he could barely stand to separate from her for classes, much less for sessions on the weight machines. But other than that he had been a regular for over ten years and it showed. Stacy had a long way to go before she could even be considered a bodybuilder, even as a lightweight, and she would never be able to challenge him in strength. So really, there was nothing for him to worry about. Nothing at all. 5 -- May -- Year 2 John was in the second week on a project in Little Rock for a certain retail business headquartered in the State. He had to hand it to them. They knew how to negotiate with their suppliers. His profit on this job would hardly justify his time. Still, the chance for repeat business and references might make it worthwhile. Might. With the way they were forcing him to reveal his "proprietary techniques" as part of the evaluation -- like they were draining his skills away -- he doubted he would have much left to sell them. Already the project's cost reimbursement budget had forced him out of the downtown Holiday Inn where he had wanted to stay and into the Bayonet, a no frills tourist motor hotel without a gym and with nothing to do nearby, leaving him to watch tired porn movies and surf the internet. After three weeks of a diet of cheap sandwiches, donuts, cokes and beer, he could feel his body turning to mush. Stacy was never home when he called in the evening. He could guess that with him away she was spending her free time with her friends. Or shopping. Or perhaps the gym. She was becoming quite a little hardbody. John sighed. Didn't she understand that she would just never have the massive muscle he dreamed about? Making herself thin and wiry just wouldn't do it for him. It was out of desperation that John dragged himself to a bar he had noticed driving to and from his client's offices. At least he could watch the playoffs with some company, even if they rooted for the wrong teams. He'd had three beers and a steak at the bar and was tightly focused on the TV screen at his left when he got a feeling that someone was eyeing him. Not sure if it was a Mavericks supporter angry about John's rooting for the Spurs he turned around slowly, only to see a busty blond with big hair smiling at him and looking him straight in the eye. He hesitated for half a second and then, after a quick glance told him what he needed to know, he returned the look. "Can I buy you another, um" "Mae-Lynn, and yes you may," she answered in a sultry voice. She brushed the hair from her face and leaned toward him just a bit. "And you are" "John Rose" he said, holding her eyes. She smiled more broadly. "Why, isn't that a sweet name." John nodded agreeably and ordered another round for each of them. She certainly had a pretty smile and great bust although he couldn't see her legs under the bar. "So, are you from around here?" he asked. She shook her head. "I'm down here with Momma for my big sister Lorna's graduation. But she's spending most of her time with her friends, which leaves me pretty free. Actually," she winked, "that's kind of how I planned it. Anything to get out of Momma's house for awhile. Wish I'd been as smart as my sister and gone away to college. And what are you here for? You one of those MeGaCo millionaires? Or are you a government fella?" "I wish. No, I'm down here from New York, doing some work for MeGaCo. I'm an independent consultant. I --" She waved her hand. "Oh don't tell me. It won't mean anything to me, I can guarantee that! But I can tell from looking at you that whatever you do you do real good." The music in the next room started up. "Hey, Mae-Lynn, do you dance?" She grinned. "I was wondering if you were going to ask." He stood up and she slid off the stool. She was nearly as tall as he was, with big bones and long, thick legs to go with her breasts. She leaned on him and he almost stumbled, not expecting her weight, but then held her up firmly. "Oooh, you ARE a strong one," she said, happily. "I do like big men, 'cause it takes a big man to hold on to Mae-Lynn." He started moving toward the room with the music but she wasn't walking and he stopped short, feeling her stubborn solidity. "You know," she said, whispering in his ear, "we don't HAVE to dance in THERE." John felt a shiver of desire pass through him. Her round hip was pushing into his groin as she swiveled her hip gently. "My hotel room's not much, but it's close," he said. "Hey, close is close enough for me, John Rose," she replied, putting her arm around his shoulder. He put a twenty on the bar and they left together. It was just five minutes to his hotel, and in three more minutes they were in his room. She looked around, not impressed by the room. John felt a little embarrassed. "I know. I know. I started out at the Holiday Inn, but MeGaCo's pretty cheap with its reimbursements." Mae-Lynn sat on the bed and faced him. "The Holiday Inn? I'd love to stay there. Just once." John smiled at her eagerness. She was pretty easy to impress. "Well, I guess I could move back there. It's not THAT expensive." Mae-Lynn's eyebrows rose in interest. "A friend of mine said the sheets there are SO soft. And they give away the nicest shampoos and things." She looked down. "Not that that sort of thing interests a man much," she said, pulling off her blouse and undoing her bra. She watched John's eyes drop down and she grinned. "I guess you've made love to a whole lot big girls, John Rose?" "Well, I have to say, you're just about the biggest," he said, enjoying the sight of her breasts springing free. "They're 40 double-dees, in case you were going to ask. And, just so you know, I'm six feet and half an inch, a hundred eighty-five pounds. I'm not shy about my size." John's eyes strayed from her breasts to her arms. "Yeah, I'm big there too. I hope you don't mind, but I'm one of those girls with muscles too, I guess. I don't work on 'em. They just grew that way." She laughed awkwardly, then grabbed John and pulled him onto the bed and jumped on top. "See? Pretty strong for a girl." She laughed loudly, as John tried to get her off. She had him in a good hold, but he held her arms and managed to turn the tables and get on top of her while she struggled a little. "Ooooh, yeah, I do like it a little rough!" she whooped. "I just KNEW you were strong! Stronger even than little me!" She twisted her legs around his, and suddenly his lower body was trapped. As hard as he strained he couldn't move his legs. "Yeah! Got you going, didn't I? That little trick works every time, even on a big man like you!" she cried out happily, squeezing his ass now. A few quick moves and he was inside her. "Got you again!" she said, but now it was as much of a moan of pleasure as one of triumph. He grunted back. They were both in the heat of passion now, each gripping at the other with fevered intensity. John held back a little at first, but it was clear she wanted him to go at her harder and soon he let go, banging away deeper and deeper as she whooped louder and louder. Everyone in the hotel must have heard them and the shaking of the bed, but what did it matter out in the middle of Little Rock? She was pushing so hard that she was lifting him clear off the bed. Man, she was great! She was coming, the spasms rocking her body, but he was holding out for more. He let her have her fun, and then he started up again. She moaned, "Oh you beautiful Rose! You've got more for me, don't you? Oh my man! What a man!" and wrapped her arms around him, squeezing him to her, almost crushing the breath out of him. But the slight pain only excited him more. This was the real thing, not just a fantasy. He held her shoulders, feeling her long, hard trapezious muscles, and then dropped his hands to her biceps. Even in her arousal she hesitated for a moment, unsure why he was touching them. "You all right?" she asked, suddenly sounding insecure. He'd gone this far. He wasn't going to stop. "Let me feel them," he croaked. "Let me feel them when you flex." "You want to feel my muscles?" she asked, amazed. Her pelvis stopped its rocking motion. "Yes I do," he replied, his heart pounding, his hips continuing to thrust into her. "Come on, Mae-Lynn. Let me feel what you've got!" "Well?" she said, unsure, and then it started to click. "Well! You mean, you LIKE my MUSCLES?" she said, uncomprehendingly, but starting to rock him again. He looked her in the eyes and then at the large masses of muscle he was holding. "Oh, I do. I really do. If you don't mind." He felt a charge go through her body like a shock as her legs clutched him ferociously. "Oh, no! Not at ALL, Johnny Rose!" she bellowed and clenched her fists and tightened her biceps as hard as she could. "How's this? How're THESE muscles?!!" They popped up under his hands, hardening into solid balls. The heads of her biceps pushed against his palms and his fingers carressed them, cupping around their curves, letting their hard round shape impress themselves into his hands. "Oh god! Oh you beautiful man! Oh god!" she cried out. She was crying now. Crying, clutching him in her snatch, pumping her arms and pressing him to her, moaning in pleasure and then coming again. "Oh god! Now I wish they were bigger, twice as big if that's what you want. Oh, you like my muscles! You like them!" she yelled, sobbing and coming. "Oh give it to me! Give it ALL to me!" She was an animal beneath him, and he held on for the best ride of his life. He let himself go completely, pistoning into her with pure, selfish abandon as he squeezed her hard biceps and then let it all go, his passion overflowing into her and then, and then, as it slowly ebbed, he sank onto her chest, letting her close her muscled arms around him and repeat, "Oh John! Oh John! Oh John!" again and again like an anthem or a prayer. 6 The next evening he met Mae-Lynn after work. It was still light and the air was warm. They started their evening strolling up the river. She wore a sleeveless top and tiny shorts, leaving her rounded biceps fully exposed and little else to the imagination, and as soon as they left the urban area they were kissing furiously. John was burning with desire for her, she for him, and they could barely tear themselves away from each other. Only the occasional clucks of disapproval of others walking along the path forced them to stop for air. "Maybe, Mae-Lynn," John panted, "maybe we should just go back to the Holiday Inn and -- "Oh I know," Mae-Lynn gasped, "I want you so much. But I really wanted to take you to see the Travelers play. It's great [pant] baseball, even though they're [pant] minor league. I'm a real big fan, you know, and -- "Yeah," he chimed in, "a BIG fan," and grabbed her ass to pull her closer. "Oh John!" she gasped. "You KNOW it!" She was breathing heavily. "I want you right NOW!" she moaned. "I want you to kiss every INCH of my big, strong body, lick every MUSCLE I have while I make them big and hard for you." She flexed her biceps and John leaned down and mashed his lips against them. "Oh god! I feel like I'm coming already!" she squealed, pushing against him and almost knocking him down. They looked at each, laughed and said "Hotel!" in unison. The next three nights were the same, until John couldn't stretch out the assignment any longer. Mae-Lynn came with him to the airport and clutched him tearfully at the gate. "I don't think I can let you go!" she cried. John sighed. He had told her about Stacy after their second night together, and Mae-Lynn had laughed in disbelief that he was living with a girlfriend who was small-boned, barely 5'4" and even after months of weight training had nowhere near the muscle Mae-Lynn had. Now she said, "You're telling me that this LITTLE girl is going to keep you satisfied? After you've had ME?" "I don't know. I really don't know." Actually John didn't know. He'd never had such mind-blowingly incredible sex as with Mae-Lynn. But she was a loud country girl, with no experience beyond her small town. He couldn't imagine her in New York City or with any of his friends. And he could never live in a place like Little Rock, much less whatever little hole-in-the-wall she came from. "Well, you know what we've had together, and just let me leave you with one little thought, my darling Rose. You keep your picture of me in your head, how I am now, and then you just think of how I'm gonna look after I start working out, 'cause I'm going to get bigger and bigger, and stronger and stronger, just for you Johnny, until I'm so big 'n strong I can just breathe in and suck you right out of New York and bring you back to me where you belong. You hear me? And you put that picture of me, all grown bigger and stronger, in your mind next to your little Stacy-poo and you decide what you want!" And with that she picked him up in a cradle-hold, to the titters of the other boarding passengers, and lifted him to her lips to kiss him good-bye. 7 Although she knew it was an essential part of John's consulting work, Stacy hated when he traveled. He wasn't very good at talking on the telephone, except for business, and he never even emailed her. It wasn't that she was that worried about what he was up to, all by himself. He always worked so hard, especially when he was away, and if he wasn't working he spent his time working out or watching sports. It was just the feeling of losing their daily connection. She didn't even like to be in the apartment alone when she knew he wasn't coming home. It didn't really feel right for her to be there, maybe because even though he'd let her add a few feminine touches to make herself comfortable there, he was still the owner and to her it still felt as though it was his. So when he was away she usually just tried to keep herself busy and stay with friends at night. In a way, it was like going back to being a teenager and having pyjama parties all the time, although admittedly she was not being as much fun now as she had been. After all, she was learning a new job and could not afford to stay up too late. Her friends were mostly supportive of her new discipline and a little bit jealous at the results. They had all tried dieting at various times, some more successfully than others, but Stacy was being so good about it! Stacy tried to explain that the exercise was a lot easier to keep up than a diet. She was eating as much as before -- more in fact, but she didn't want to brag. It was the work at the gym that made all the difference. And once she had gotten used to it, it actually made her feel good. She had gotten Carli and Monica to join up at the gym too -- it gave her a bonus discount, which really came in handy. And now that she was spending so much time at the gym, she'd made new friends there who understood her new interests. With their encouragement and all her free time, she was ending up working out twice as much as usual. She had gone down two dress sizes now, and was a little perturbed that she'd lost half a cup size, but her pecs were so much firmer that with the right kind of top her bust looked even better than before, higher and, well, perkier. At least her friends thought so. She wondered how John would react to all the changes when he finally came back. It was definitely exciting seeing her body change. It was different from when she was becoming a woman, when her breasts were growing so quickly that for awhile it seemed as though she needed a new bra every month. A lot of the times she was feeling sick or awkward and when she was a teenager her periods were so painful. Also, then it was something that was happening to her. Now it felt like she was the one in control. She making her own body, through her own efforts. And instead of feeling awkward and sick, she felt stronger, healthier. It was like magic, in a way, but she was the magician. The one thing that bothered her, though, was that of all of her friends, Jeannie, her oldest and best friend in New York, was the most skeptical about her campaign. Jeannie never exercised at all and ate whatever she wanted, yet she always stayed slender and shapely, with perfect skin too. Given that, Stacy could sort of understand why Jeannie didn't put much stock in exercise and thought it was a waste of time. But Stacy wasn't like Jeannie. She tried to explain why she was working so hard, what it meant to her to be improving her body and fulfilling John's fantasy, but she just didn't seem to be able to make her friend understand. The night before John ended his trip Stacy was staying with Jeannie. The two of them had just eaten and were now curled up on Jeannie's bed. talking while they half-watched an episode of "Sex and the City" and half-looked at Stacy's latest fitness progress report. They watched intently as the four friends discussed Carrie's latest falling out with "Mr. Big." Stacy chipped in with her own observations and then Jeannie picked up the progress report, sighed and said, "Really, Stacy. If you really like exercising then you should go ahead and do it, but you shouldn't expect John to love you more for it. Men aren't like that. Does Big suddenly commit to Carrie when she tries to change to please him?" "You're wrong, Jeannie. I mean, you should see how much this muscle thing means to John. He told me I'm the first girl he's ever confessed his interest to. That's got to mean something. And ... and I think it's GOOD that he likes muscles on a girl. I mean, it's better than just liking breasts, you know?" Jeannie made a little "mmm, hmm" and looked at her, waiting. "I mean, I think it's very modern. Very feminist in a way. It means he accepts the idea that women are equal, that they can have power too! That we're not just for making babies and feeding them." Jeannie cocked her head. "You think John's a feminist? That he wants YOU to have power? I won't even GO there!" Stacy frowned. "Hey, You know I like John. I just don't want you to be disappointed or get hurt." "He's not going to -- "Stacy, come on, I'm only being honest with you. I'm just saying, be realistic. I've seen John look at me when I'm wearing my little halter top. And I can tell you he's not looking at MY muscles!" "But -- "And his thing about female muscle, don't you think it's really just another kind of object for him to fixate on? It's not like he's connecting with you more as a person because you have muscles or putting you in the driver's seat. He still wants to be the boss. He decides on the fantasy, right? It still seems to me like it's just another kind of objectifying fantasy. And you said yourself he still keeps his eyes closed when you make love, that he still wants to imagine you're being much more muscular than you are, than you'll ever be." At that, Jeannie laughed and got a faraway look in her eyes. "What's so funny?" Stacy asked, feeling downcast and a little hurt. "I don't know. I was just thinking, uh, wondering, how he'd feel if you really were as strong as he fantasizes you to be." Stacy looked glum. "Well, you and I know that's impossible. He told me once how big he liked to imagine me. No woman could EVER be THAT big. At least, no one I know and certainly not me!" Jeannie smiled. "Exactly!" she said and then she shrugged. "Well, think about it this idea. I mean, if he really was serious about making his fantasy a reality, then I suppose you could keep working out like you are, and he could completely stop exercising and also go on some kind of low protein diet so that he loses a lot of his muscle tone and even some muscle. Eventually you would be much stronger than he was, right? Now, be honest with me, do you think he'd like that, or not?" Stacy screwed up her face. "No way!" Then she giggled. "Just imagine, me being as strong as I am now, or even stronger, and him being like I was!" She thought a moment and then sighed. "Honestly, I think he'd hate it. He'd hate being inferior to me in ANY way! I guess it would probably turn him on. But he'd never WANT to do it." "No, probably not. Men never want to change for the sake of their relationships, but they think nothing of asking women to change: dieting, plastic surgery, you know." "I know! And we do it for them ALL THE TIME!" "See? You agree with me! And they're never satisfied. You change one thing and the next thing you know Men are really strange, aren't they!" "I do not agree!" Stacy pouted. "Well, maybe I do a little. But really love him, Jeannie. I think he's a really special guy, maybe even the "one". I still think it's good for me to be working out like this, and I still think he likes it. And maybe when he comes back I'll be big enough so that he won't HAVE to close his eyes." Stacy flexed her biceps and a firm muscle rose off her arm in a gentle curve like that at the top of a computer mouse, but not nearly as large. She dropped her arm and her head slumped. "Oh, who am I kidding? I'll never grow enough to make a difference one way or the other!" Jeannie realized she'd gone too far. "Aw, Stacy, I'm sorry. You've really developed a lot in just a few months! I'm not trying to discourage you," she said sympathetically. She looked as though she was about to do something and then looked pained, shook her head slightly and bit her lip. Instead, she touched Stacy's hair and gently carressed her head. "There, there, sweetie. If you feel that way about him, then I bet fate will bring you together. You know how much he likes you already. It can only get better." Poor Stacy was crying, so Jeannie held her and continued to rub her back. "You really miss him. He'll be home soon, I'm sure. And once you're together again it will all be fine, even better than before. I'm sure of it." Stacy put her arm around Jeannie and held her. "Oh Jeannie! I don't know what I'd do without you!" she sobbed. The two talked softly for a few more minutes and then went to bed. 8 The trip back was one of those classic flights from hell. The short flight to Dallas dodged thunderstorms all the way so the seatbelt sign never went off. He was stuck in a middle seat between a large, overweight woman eating potato chips and candy bars and a teenager whose headphones leaked heavy metal sounds the entire time. And due to the turbulence he couldn't even get a drink. He had to dash across DFW to make his connecting flight and then they sat on the runway for three hours while yet another line of thunderstorms slowly passed through. At least he had been able to upgrade to business class for that leg and he napped on the plane, but by the time he got back to his apartment from LaGuardia he was hot, hungry and in a very foul mood. Stacy wasn't there, which was just as well, but she had left nothing in the fridge for him. Instead, he ordered a pizza and took a shower. That and a few beers seemed to restore his equilibrium. By then it was nearly midnight but he wasn't tired. Not with that nap and a full stomach. Well, it had been weeks since he'd had a proper fast internet connection. With Stacy out, this would be a perfect time to catch up on what he'd missed. The next hour and a half was a furious effort to tour his favorite sites while he downloaded videos and pictures. At last, Steve the Z had resumed his Tarzella series! And "marc" had posted links to hundreds of new pictures in Fistman's old board. There was plenty of good stuff. But he was in the mood for something different. The experience of Mae-Lynn, with her real muscles and unbounded sexual enthusiasm left him unsatisfied with the usual internet fare. And then he found something he hadn't done yet, a site with downloadable audio stories, with "real actors and actresses". Just a couple of dollars each. He looked through the stories and clicked on one with an intriguing description, then leaned back and closed his eyes, letting the voice talk to him. What a voice. Low, sexy, confident, playful. He was already getting very hard, but he resisted the temptation. He could always play the good parts again later. The woman with the sexy voice was playing a Hollywood wannabee with a lot of muscle, trying to get her first part. A producer of an action movie had invited her back to his house. "So, uh, why do you want to interview me here at your house, Mr. Flower? What's wrong with your office?" "Well, you're new in this town, Stephanie. I don't like to work with unknowns. I want to get to know you better, make sure you're the kind of person I'd like to work with. So, tell me about yourself." "Well, ok. I'm a model, you know, and -- "Where have you worked?" "Umm, I haven't gotten any jobs yet ...." "I see." "But, as you can see, I'm very qualified. I think I've got tons of potential. I've got hard, 16" biceps, rock solid abs, and a 46" bust, which is made up both of muscle and my spectacular DD breasts." "Double dees? Hmmm. That's what they all say. Let's see them." "See ... my -- my breasts?" "Come, come. I need to see if they're really yours. I don't have all night. Yes, yes, take that off, and your bra. I want it all off. Well! Mmmm, hmmm! You ARE very striking, and muscular too. I don't really understand why I haven't seen you, or heard of you, before. How long have you been in town?" "Uh, two months." "Really? Still, I make it my business to find girls like you for my movies. Did you compete in sports in high school?" "No." "With your height and muscle? Why not?" "Well ... I wasn't always like this. I've developed just recently. Very quickly." "Is that so? Well. Girls' bodies do strange things, I suppose." "Oh yes, Mr. Flower. You have no idea!" "Well, I can see you're proud of your body. I like it too. I don't often meet a woman who is nearly as big as I am. You may be just what we need for the stunt double. We'll have to see how your body performs in action. So, you say you can act too? What experience do you have?" "Umm, er. Well, not much." "I see." "Maybe I can show you my, uh, talent by telling a story. Like how I got to be so big and so strong?" "Why sure, Stephanie," he answered. There was a sound of him getting comfortable. "Just don't get dressed again while you tell me your little story. I want to see how you handle yourself without your clothes -- sort of a test under pressure." "Um, all right. I, uh, guess so, if you want to look at them. You're kind of a professional, right? I mean, you're sitting very close, Mr. Flowers. Could I, uh, ask you, uh, just one thing. Um, please don't touch my breasts while I'm talking. It'll, uh, you know, distract me. Do you think you can do that?" He laughed. "Oh, absolutely. And I'll have a video of this to protect me too." "Mr. Flow -- um, I guess ... I guess that's all right. I just want you to be patient and get to know me a little first. So, Mr. Flower, when you look at my breasts, you probably can guess that I wasn't always the woman I am now. Even just a couple of years ago when I was seventeen, I was only 5'4", with an A cup, and I weighed only ... well, a lot less than I do now." The man laughed. "So, as you said, you were a late bloomer. I'm glad your body knew what to do." "Mmmmm hmmm. Well, yes. I, uh, I'm sure you want to see what my body can do. Well, it was just a couple of months ago, really, that it happened. I was dating a boy then, a nice boy, so I thought. Back in Minnesota, where I'm from. Tad was impatient. He wanted to take things faster and farther than I was ready. You know boys, young boys especially. One night, he parked his car on a deserted road out of town and we started kissing, like we always did. And then he started getting fresh, touching me in places I didn't want him to." She paused. "Of course, even then I was just 5'6" and really not very strong," she said, "not at all strong enough to defend my ... virtue. Anyway, he got my shirt off, and my bra. I couldn't really stop him, and no one could hear me scream." "You mean he raped you?" John could hear the man shift uncomfortably. "And, uh, after that you decided that you'd build up your strength so that it would never happen again?" He looked sceptical. "And this was just two months ago? Hey, I like a good story. But it has to be believable! And so far, I'm telling you, you haven't exactly sold me on it." "Oh please, Mr. Flower! Let me tell it. I swear it's true. Every word!" He crossed his arms in front of his chest and leaned back in his chair, waiting to be convinced. "So you see, back then my breasts were a lot smaller than they are now, but they were still nice. Round, firm, and, you know, 'perky'." She laughed and he looked once again at her magnificent pair. "Go on then, Stephanie. I don't really know what this has to do with how you developed, but I'm listening." "Well, he just couldn't wait to touch them. There I was squirming against the car door, with nowhere to go, in the middle of God knows where. There was nothing I could do. He was so much stronger than I, a real jock, and there I was, just a typical, helpless girl. I was trying to push him away, but he grabbed me and pulled me closer, and my arms just collapsed against his strength. So, he had one hand on one breast, feeling it, playing with it, and despite everything he was starting to turn me on. Because my breasts are very sensitive. Very, very sensitive! And then he put his other hand on the other breast. All of a sudden I got this strange feeling. A kind of special energy. It felt so good! My first thought was, 'what a bad girl you are, liking this!' but then it felt SO good that I decided I didn't WANT him to stop. But when I looked up at him, he seemed different. Like he was losing his enthusiasm. I felt him start to pull away, but now I didn't want him to, so I put my hands on top of his, to encourage him to keep his hands right there. And it was funny. His hands seemed smaller, or my breasts seemed larger. I didn't think much about it. I wasn't in a MOOD to think, you know? It was just a fleeting thought, like, 'what if it's really true that your breasts get larger when boys feel you up,' like that rumor some of the girls in school would spread. But I was feeling too good to think about it. I just wanted more. So I held his hands against my breasts and now I could feel HIM kind of pulling away from ME, but he couldn't have been trying very hard, because it wasn't that hard for me to hold him. And I was just feeling better and better. It was kind of like a game he was playing, I figured. I hadn't wanted to, and he did, and now he could see I was feeling good and wanting more, so he was teasing me by pretending to stop. Well, fine, I thought. I'll play, so long as he keeps his hands on me and keeps touching me. So I laughed and then looked up at him, expecting to see a little twinkle in his eye, to show me that he knew 'he had won'. Well, I had to admit that I thought he had. I would have done anything with him at that point. And have thanked him for it too. But when I looked up I could see right away that he wasn't playing with me. He was scared, terrified. And that wasn't all." At this, there was a pause, and from the sound of the following words John could tell that the woman had started to smile. "He looked different. His face looked smaller somehow, and his t-shirt was hanging on his neck. His chest was narrower too, and then I noticed his arms. They were practically swimming inside his sleeves. His biceps seemed to have vanished completely! In a matter of seconds, all his muscle had gone, and he was smaller too. I was startled too, and those special feelings coming from his hands on my breasts seemed to be dissipating. So I loosened my hands to let him go and he quickly pulled his away. I just couldn't believe what I saw! His wrists were so small! They were like a young girl's! He was looking at me strangely too. 'Wh-wha-what did you DO to me?!' he asked, both frightened and angry. I hadn't done anything. And then I noticed my own arm. For the first time in my life, I had a muscle. Not like the ones I have now, but I could see a ridge on my forearm and a bulge in my upper arm. And my chest was bigger too. And my shoulders. 'You STOLE them,' he cried. 'You stole my muscles!' 'Don't be ridiculous,' I told him. 'That's impossible.' But when I looked at myself and compared my arms with his, it was obvious that he was right." She paused again, as if she were reliving the moment. "That poor boy. Seeing him so small and weak, so defenseless, really turned me on. I don't know why. But then I really wanted him, and, I'm embarrassed to admit, I took him in my arms, which now were as muscular as his had been, or even more so, and held his little body against mine. And as his body pressed against both my breasts I got that feeling again, weaker than before, but still here. Now he was pushing at me, trying to get away just like I had pushed him before, but there was absolutely nothing he could do to stop me. Now I was so much stronger than he was! I kissed him, held him, pushed and rubbed myself against him and made him touch me the way I wanted to be touched, and then I came. It wasn't intercourse, you know, but a girl can come even without intercourse, as I'm sure you know. I felt so good that night. And then I let Tad take me home. With his little stick arms he could barely turn the steering wheel of his car! I think he left town the next day. I never heard from him again." There was a silence for several seconds and the man exhaled loudly, skeptically. "So, uh, that's how you grew? That's how you got your muscles, and your, uh, big breasts?" "Well, in part. And of course the breasts weren't from him. As a man, he didn't have any breasts to give me. Those I got from a very sexy 'bi' woman I met in school, when I was working in a strip club to pay some bills. Poor Eartha. She loved my body, especially my breasts. She couldn't resist licking them, sucking on them, and most of all touching them. And after that, the poor girl had to find other work. There were other men too. It took more than one man to make me as big and strong as I am today. You do understand that, right? I don't want you to think I'm still a virgin, or almost a virgin." "Uh, no. Of course not." "You don't believe me, do you?" There were several more seconds of silence and the tension and the suspense rose. You could hear his breathing. "Of COURSE you don't! Those things don't really happen, except in some man's crazy fantasy life, right?" There was a pause, then the man said, "Hah! That's right! And not mine, for sure!" She laughed too, in a way that sounded a little forced. "I really got you going, didn't I? It's just a story, Mr. Flower. Ha-ha-ha! So, uh, I'm pretty good, huh? Not just a big girl with a great body? Ha-ha! So, don't you think I can be a REAL actress? You know, I'd be willing to do just about ANYTHING." "Oh yeah, definitely. I was just wondering if YOU believed it. That's all. Well, well. You've got some real promise, Stephanie. I can tell you're going to go places, and I'm just the man to help you get there." "Oh good! That's good. Ha-ha! Men who fantasize about 'impossible' women aren't my type at all. But you are, Mr. Flower. You're exactly the kind of man I like. Tall, strong, bold. A man who sees what he wants and isn't afraid to take it." She laughed playfully. "I was worried you wouldn't take me seriously as an actress. But this has gone much better than I'd expected. And, uh, if you want too, you know, I mean, I'm ready for you. It's been so nice of you to wait -- if you want to touch them." She laughed again. "Hey, what's the matter? You're not afraid to touch me, are you?" "Of course not." "You KNOW it was just a story! Heh, heh. You're making me feel like I was SUCH a good actress. Ooooh, you're so sweet! Let me kiss you. There. See? Not so bad, was it? And you, ha ha, still have your muscles, Mr Flower?" He laughed. "Yeah, well of course. And why don't you call me Joe, Stephanie. I mean, when we're together, like this." "Awwww thanks, Joe. I can be a real kidder, you know. I haven't turned you off me, have I?" She was very solicitous now, very eager to please him. "Oh, no," he said. "On the contrary. I'm really impressed, Stephanie. You're a girl with real potential. I'm sure there's a lot we can do together. I can do great things for a girl like you." "I KNOW you can," she said, sounding excited. "I know. And I'm SO thrilled just to be with you like this. Just thinking about it is making me realllly hot. So, why don't you just come closer and get to know my body a little bit better?" "Heh-heh-heh. Don't mind if I do." There was a lot of sexy moaning from Stephanie and then, "Oh, Joe, I had no idea you were SUCH a good kisser too. I want your hands ALL over me! Oh, yes! I'm so sensitive there, and there and there! Oooh, you have me tingling absolutely everywhere! Already! Mmmmmm. I want your hands on my breasts right now. They are ABSOLUTELY my MOST sensitive parts. I know you'd like to touch them. Look at how you've made my nipples stand up! That's it. Mmmmmm. Yes. Oh yes! OH YESS!!" "Hey!" the man's voice cried out. "Hey!! What's happening!?" "Oh, Joe! I feel so close to you. I want to feel you all over." "Umm ... I ... "What is it, Joe? Joe? Is something wrong? You know, your hands feel so good on my breasts. You're making me feel so good ALL over. I want to hold you closer." "I ... so weak ... and I -- you -- [gasp] can't breathe -- crushing me." "Why, it's just a little hug, darling. A LITTLE hug!!" His voice, softly. "Ohh! Awwww! felngsostranji" "What's that? You're mumbling, darling. I can't hear you." "It's just -- all of a sudden ... I feel ... so strange ... so weak ... dizzy ... like I have ... the flu ... or something --" "The FLU? NOW??" Stephanie asked, incredulously, then burst out laughing. "I don't THINK so! Awww, let Stephie have a look at you. Oh GOODNESS me! LOOK what's HAPPENED to YOU!" "I ... I" "Oh me oh my! You've gotten SMALLER! Your muscles are just HALF the size they used to be! How did THAT happen?!" "I ... I ... no! It's impossible!" "I KNOW! Things like this just don't HAPPEN in REAL life. Do they?" "No, they -- my GOD! LOOK at YOU!" "Heh-heh. I LOVE it when you look at me like that!" "Your muscles. They've grown ... they've gotten so much bigger!" "You THINK so? Let me flex them and see. Oh my, you're right! They ARE larger, aren't they! But how -- well, you don't think they're TOO large ... for the starring role?" "The starring -- wait! Uma Thurmond has that part!" "That little stick? An action hero? That's crazy! What'd she do? Sleep with you?" "That's none of your -- that has nothing to do with -- "Just look at how MY biceps rise so high when I flex them. They're rock hard too! Isn't it amazing the way they grow so quickly when I have a strong man around, a man who knows all about power? Do you think you should feel them to check them out? Do you think your audience will like them too?" "I don't know ... I --" "Don't YOU like them?" "I ... I" "You're not sure? Let me pump them a few times to help you decide. Mmmm. Have you ever SEEN a woman with a figure like mine with such big muscles too? They look like pure power to me. But if YOU'RE not sure, then maybe...." She sighed loudly. "Oh well. I guess I'd better just get dressed and go home." "Wait! Where are you going? You're not going to LEAVE me like this!?" "No? But you're not giving me the part! You're giving it to Uma!" "You can't do this to me!" "Do what?" "Take my ... my -- "Your muscles? Hmmmm? Did I take them away?" "Dammit! You know what you've done, missy!" "Ooooh look, the big shot is getting angry. Did I do something I shouldn't have done? Something wrong? Tee-hee. Look at the big producer with the itty bitty muscles! He's gonna punch me. I'm scared, really scared!" "Stop that! Now you listen to me! You are NOT going to leave me with the strength of a teenage boy!" John knew just what was coming. Just thinking about it was making him so hard. His whole body was screaming at him for release. Resisting the desire to end it right here and now was almost torture, but he wanted to -- no he HAD to -- hear the rest while he was feeling just like this. There was a sound of a large body settling against the springs of a bed. "But you look so cute. Let me feel those little muscles of yours. Oh, they're adorable! So soft and cuddly! So completely harmless!" "Let go of them. Owwww!" "I was just squeezing them a little. I wanted to see how hard they were. I mean, how soft. Oh Mr. Flower! Look how small they look now next to mine. See how mine rise up and down when I flex them, like a great big ball inflating? I bet that if you flexed yours, they would pretty much just stay along that skinny little line. Let's see!" "You ... you ... witch!" "I'm not a witch. I'm just -- I don't know -- a little strange. It's just a funny thing my body knows how to do. It happens when someone touches both my breasts, almost like they're closing an electrical circuit. If it's a woman touching me, my breasts grow and hers shrink. And if it's a man, then I get bigger and bigger and stronger and stronger. And the man ... well, tee-hee ... as you know!" "Listen you. I'll -- "Ooooh, what a temper! You just tried to hit me! Well, I blocked your little fist but you're still trying! C'mon, Mr. Flower! Push harder! Try to push my hand back. Awww, you can't? Are your arm and its itty bitty muscles too weak to push away the arm of a young girl? Awww, you're so cute when you get mad and try so hard! You're all red! I'm going to have to give you a great big hug." "No! Stay away! Stay away from me!" "But you didn't want me to leave you as strong as a teenage boy, so I'm gonna help you. Ha! Just look at you, trying to push me away. Those cute little arms of yours, struggling and straining against my shoulders. But I'm not moving. MY muscles are SO much bigger! SO much stronger! It's so EASY for me to pull you closer like THIS! And THIS! We're so close now, just an inch apart. My breasts are almost touching you. It's such a turn on to be so close together, isn't it!" "No! Get away!" "I'm getting so turned on! Oh my, look at my nipples! They're getting harder! And longer!" "No!!" "They're coming closer to you! Heh-heh! You're straining to get away. But my hand is right in back of you. So you can't move, can you? As hard as you try. Even now you aren't even close to being strong enough. Imagine how it will be after we touch. Imagine how much stronger I'll be then, how much weaker you'll be. Did you know I can make your muscle go anywhere I want? Imagine ALL the muscle from your legs flooding into my arms, making my biceps that much bigger, that much stronger!" "Noooo!!" "Tee hee. And just imagine: you, a man, so afraid, terrified even, of a woman's breasts. My breasts. My big, round, beautiful breasts. The idea of it just makes me SOOOOOOOO hot! Oh, yes! Just thinking about it is making my nipples even harder. And longer. So long!" "Agggghhh! They're touching me! Oh God, no! This can't be happening to me. My muscles are just melting away! I'll be nothing more than skin and bones. Please! Have mercy!" "Mmmm, mercy, mercy me! I can actually feel your strength pouring into me. My arms are filling up with your muscle. Look at my biceps grow! Imagine the strength I have now! Look at the size of my muscles! Isn't this what an action heroine should look like?" "Please, Stephanie, please." "You kept yourself so fit, with your fancy exercise room and thousand dollars a week trainer, and now all that hard muscle is mine. Wow! Just like that! Oooh, feel them Rock hard. Awww, but you're too weak now even to raise your arms. You're shrinking away, dwindling, collapsing, disappearing, and ... gone!" She chuckled. "Gotcha!" John couldn't resist another second and exploded into his hand. Stephanie gave a low chuckle. "Not much left of HIM. Well, I may not have gotten the part, but I got the whole. Mmmmmmmmmmm." The file ended. John washed up a bit, saved the file and slid into bed. He'd have no trouble sleeping now. 9 The next morning John awakened to the sound of the key turning in the lock. He shook his head groggily. He couldn't remember how he'd left the computer. Had he exited the audio story site? Had he left his sensitive directory up on Explorer? He raced out of bed to his office and quickly turned off the monitor screen just in case, then went out into the hallway. "Stacy! Hi!" he bellowed, forcing out considerably more enthusiasm than he usually mustered before 2 pm. She came right in and hugged him closely. "John. Oh John! You're back! When did you get back? You're back!" She squeezed him tightly and opened her mouth to his kiss, then rested her head on his shoulder. "You're back, you're back. I missed you so much! When did you get here? Is everything all right? Oh! I have to shower and go to work! Can we shower together?" Stacy's excitement made him smile and warm inside, then made him feel guilty, both about Mae-Lynn and his secret explorations on the Internet. He held her again, noticing the changes in her body from her last three weeks of training. "Do you LIKE it?" she asked, looking up at him hopefully. "I've been working really hard." She looked conflicted. "Ooooh! If it weren't for this new job! I REALLY have to be on time. Come on!" She pulled him by the arm to the bedroom, where she dropped her bag on the floor and then started undressing. "I was at Jeannie's last night. I'm so silly, I know, for not sleeping here. I just can't help feeling funny -- being in your apartment when you're away. Maybe if we were --" She stopped suddenly, realizing what she had almost said. She was nearly undressed now and was feeling extremely sensitive to John's reaction to her increasingly well-toned body. Baring her feelings to him so nakedly as well would be just too much. She had considered in her daydreams of seeing him again doing a quick flexing pose for him, but in person she immediately decided not to. Definitely not. Even around John she felt a little shy about her body, and now felt even more so, especially because he hadn't said anything yet. John was looking at her. He was impressed at what she'd done in such a short period. Very impressed in fact. Her figure was trimmer and the outlines of her abdominals were very clear. Her shoulders were broader and faint traces of her veins ran down her arms, which no longer jiggled, even a little. Instead there was a curve of muscle, not large. Certainly not large compared with his, or even Mae-Lynn's he thought with more than one kind of pang, but it was a muscle where there had been nothing but soft feminine flesh before. On another day he might have taken her arm, laid his head along her biceps and felt the muscle with his cheek, then asked her to flex it, enjoying the sensation of the muscle rising within her, its hardness, the fact that it was hers and thrilling somehow in the knowledge that it was his desire that had almost magically willed that muscle into being. "It's great honey. Amazing even. I can't believe how much you've developed already," he said. He took her arm and kissed it from her wrist to her shoulder, pausing to kiss her biceps twice. "I love it." She looked at him intently. "Oh do you? Oh John! I'm so glad! I'm so excited you're home, so excited for us. You know I want to be the perfect girl for you!" She hugged him again, burying her face on his chest, letting her expression go for just a moment to express the disappointment she felt in his reaction. She STILL wasn't big enough for him. She could tell. She STILL wasn't the girl of his dreams. Would she EVER be? Then she took a deep breath. "Do you WANT to take your shower now? With me? You must have gotten in late. You can go back to bed if you want. I'm just glad to see you." "No, no! I need to get up. Come on!" He picked her up in a cradle hold and carried her to the bathroom while she wondered whether what he REALLY wanted was for her to do that to HIM. But she'd NEVER be strong enough to do that. NEVER! She hoped his fantasies weren't the ONLY way to his heart. 10 John settled back into a dreamy post-cum haze, sitting on the bed while Stacy buzzed around him, blowing him kisses every few seconds as she got dressed for work. The blow job in the shower was unexpected. So was her aggressiveness, pushing him against the wall, proving to him that him her new muscles weren't just for show. He enjoyed letting her "outmuscle" him, watching those cute biceps of hers rise as she "held him in place" to take his "punishment," as she called it, forcing him to let her drink up his "secret serum" to make her even stronger. He had to give her credit. It was a clever little scenario she'd thought up and it had made him hard instantly. He had to remember not to underestimate her, not to take her for granted. She really cared about him, really wanted to please him, and yet she wasn't a pushover. Her determination and discipline in her exercise course proved that. He kissed her good-bye and then settled back into bed, happy to take an extra hour or two to sleep. He was so relaxed. It was almost three hours later before he woke up again feeling refreshed and still very good. A shave, breakfast and coffee made him feel almost normal again, and he settled in to work to make up for several weeks of neglecting his other clients. Four hours of work settled the major upsets, and, most importantly, he sent off his bill for the last three weeks. Now he was ready for a short break and opened up his personal (unknown to colleagues, clients and Stacy) email account. Mae-Lynn had already sent him two emails, one with an attachment. With some misgivings he opened it, a large digital picture of her right biceps with an arrow pointing at its surprising peak. The email simply said, "Kiss me here!" He chuckled, superimposed some lips on it and sent it back to her while reading the other, heartfelt message about how much she missed him already. He went off for some recreational surfing and then heard the ping of a new email from Mae-Lynn. It was another picture, a crude morph of her biceps twice their original size with a smiley drawn on the side and the message, "When you kiss me I grow." John was doing his own growing too and after a few seconds hesitation, opened his instant message program and sent a greeting. "Hi" After a few seconds delay, the message came back, "My sweet Rose!!!!" "How are you?" "Missing you so much! Are you looking at my mussel?" "Yes. It's lovely." "Its powrfl darling pure power. Im so hot. I joind a gym this morning. I worked out for two hours to make my bicepts bigger and harder for you and then I took that pic." "It's very sexy." "I feel so sexy thinking of you and the way you look at me. I want to make myself reelly big and strong for you. I want you to think about my mussels growing every day. I just know they will if I start workng out alot." "I bet they will." "You know it. Cause you saw how big they got with no exersize. Does it make you hard thinking about me and my mussels growing?" "Sure does." "Did you see Stacy yet?" John hesitated a minute. He heard footsteps coming down the hallway on his floor. If it was Stacy ... no, they passed his door. "Yes." There was a short delay. "Is she alot smaller than me?" John hesitated again. He felt so disloyal, but the dialogue was making him very hot. "Yes. A lot." "Good!" came her answer, instantly. "And think about it luver. How next time I see you maybe I'll be even bigger then you." She put a smiley after that. He laughed. "I don't know about that!" "I mean it. I bet I can do it. I saw this big girl on the inrnet. Somebody put up her pic and said his girlfrend had boulders for bicepts, and I bet shes as big as you are, though she has a flabby tum and droopy boobies. Not like me. I bet I can be bigger then her too." "No harm in trying." "You know I will. Just imajen my mussels. Ill send you pics so you wont forget." John heard more footsteps. "I have to go Mae-Lynn. Bye!" He signed off and closed AIM and the email program as Stacy's key opened the door. "John? Are you home?" "Hi Stacy!" he said, furiously closing windows. "In the office." She put down her keys and walked in. "Working? Already?" "You know. Have to get my bills out." She stood behind him, leaned over and put her arms around his chest. "I know. I skipped gym ... just hoping we could maybe go out tonight. If you're not too tired." He grabbed her and pulled her over him so she landed on his lap. "Whoops!" she said, squealing happily. "Sure. Luigi's?" "Mmmm, that'd be really nice." She looked up at him, smiling. "I'm so happy when you're home." 11 The next few days with Stacy were so nice that he almost forgot about Mae-Lynn. Almost, because once a day he checked the email account he'd given her, looked at the pictures she'd sent him and sent back short replies. But he stayed off AIM. Stacy was so happy and so playful that he hardly reacted to the kidding at the gym when Gustaf displayed one of his idiotic charts showing John's current lifting (not surprisingly down slightly from before his trip-induced layoff) compared with Stacy's steady progress and then an extrapolation showing that within fourteen months she would be lifting 50% more than he. He had a steady number of smaller jobs that kept him busy during the day and gave him an opportunity to talk with his clients and catch up with billing. Even MeGaCo had questioned only one item on his invoice, so far. Life was settling back into a normal routine. Other than his nagging feelings about Mae-Lynn. Just how big COULD she get? 12 -- September -- Year 2 Stacy and Jeannie were eating dinner at Jeannie's favorite restaurant, a Middle Eastern place that had belly-dancing after 10 pm. But it was only 7 and the place was still only half-full. The owner had sent them three times as much food as they'd ordered, as he always did for Jeannie, and Stacy was picking at her favorite appetizers. Jeannie, however, was methodically eating her way through them, working from right to left. "It's just so frustrating sometimes, you know? I THINK I know how he feels about me. He says all the right things, up to a point, you know. But I keep expecting more." She looked up at Jeannie and smiled briefly. "I know you've heard all this before." "That's all right." She touched Stacy's hair. "He'd be crazy not to ask you to marry him. But, well, he's a man, isn't he?" "Well, yeah!" Stacy said, laughing. "So, you mean of course he's crazy?! You know, no other woman would do what I do for him. Unless he's away on an assignment he's in his apartment all day working. His name is on the lease. And who do you think arranges with the landlord for the repainting that's supposed to be done every three years, but hasn't been done in the five years he's lived there?" Jeannie nodded and shrugged. "I feel so silly. We're always talking about my problems with guys. I know you're a little older than I am, but if you ever want to ... I mean, maybe you don't think I could help with anything you worry about." Jeannie pursed her lips. "Oh no, Stacy. It's not that. I'm just ... not going out with anyone right now." "Right now," Stacy repeated. "As long as I've known you -- three years, right? -- you haven't been seeing anyone." Her face got serious. "I just -- shit, Jeannie, I'm not, like, prying into some, uh forbidden subject, am I? Just tell me and I'll shut up, ok?" Jeannie smiled. "Of course not. But that's not true, really. I was very much in love with Anth -- a man ... some years ago. We got married, but it didn't work out the way we'd planned. Since then I just haven't fallen in love with anyone else." "You make it sound like it was such a long time ago, like you're so old. But you're just a few years older than me, aren't you? I can't believe I'm asking you this, but I just realized I don't know. You don't have to tell me, but you're in your twenties right?" "In my twenties? Yes." Jeannie smiled. "I'm sorry for being mysterious. I'm really just more interested in talking about you than about myself. It's a long story. I'll tell you someday. I promise." "Well, ok. I'll hold you to that. I mean it." She sighed. "I don't know what to do. I need to know if there's some reason why he won't commit further. My mother says I make it too easy for him. Living there, taking care of him like he's my husband. She says, 'Why should he marry you, when it's like he has a wife already, but without any of the obligations?' I hate hearing that -- even if she could be right." Jeannie shrugged. She had finished the humus and now was working on the tarama. The tabouleh would be next. Then some tahini. "It's not like I could ask him," Stacy continued. Jeannie raised her eyebrows. "No, that wouldn't be a good idea. You have to use your eyes and ears to find out. Your nose too. Do you want some of this tarama? It's my favorite." Stacy shook her head. "I just don't like fish eggs." "They're really good for you. Stacy, you shouldn't wait for him forever. You need to find out what he really feels. But you have to be careful with men. They frighten very easily, you know. You can't be too direct." Stacy laughed. "Like I could scare JOHN off? Like I'm more powerful than HE is? That sounds so funny!" She thought of him, working late as usual on one of his projects. "But I know what you mean. I'm supposed to use my feminine wiles, my feminine intuition, right?" "Use what you have. That's the rule. You're smart, Stacy. You've got lots of skills. Find out what you want to know, so you can tell whether you're wasting your time, or, what you have to do to get him off the fence." Stacy covered her eyes. "Oh I don't know. It feels, kinda wrong. You know? Like I'd be manipulating him." "Stacy! There's nothing wrong about being perceptive, and trying to get him to commit is no worse than wearing your prettiest dress to your first date to get him to ask you out for the second date." Meanwhile back in their apartment John was nearly finished with another assignment and put it aside for now. He would take another look at it when his mind was fresh tomorrow. He only had a day to prepare before he would make the presentation, in Washington D.C., but it was a variation on others he'd done. It was just eight. Stacy had invited him to join her for dinner with Jeannie if he finished in time, but that didn't appeal to him. Jeannie was ok, especially her tits, but she always seemed to be watching him too closely. He didn't need that. It was one of the things he liked about Stacy: she wasn't always evaluating him. Unlike most girls, she pretty much took things as they came. He ordered up some dinner from the sushi place across the street, then checked his stocks, the sports scores and some industry news while he waited for the delivery. They were always so quick. He munched on the tekkamaki first, and then the hamachi and toro, saving the uni and then the ikura for last. That and some saki made him really mellow. The Yanks were in Oakland this week, so there was no game on yet. Time for some surfing. There was the usual email from Mae-Lynn. They had tailed off for awhile to once a week, but after he'd made a return trip to Arkansas three weeks ago they were coming in every day again, each one with a new digital picture. Yesterday's picture was really amazing, the way she'd rested her tit on top of her biceps, showing the head of the muscle pushing up her breast right under the nipple. He'd never seen a picture like that before. He couldn't stop staring at the head of her muscle. He'd never imagined that a girl could get so hard. For all of his annoyance about Gustaf's misleading charts of Stacy's progress, John had to admit that Mae-Lynn might actually be growing faster than most men. Maybe even faster than he could. Of course he didn't really know how much she could lift or whether she was doing it the right way, without cheating. But in a little more than three months she was already much harder than he'd remembered and bigger too. It took all his strength to wrestle her down, and he wasn't entirely sure that she hadn't let him win. It made him a little nervous, but it was exciting too. He wondered whether MeGaCo had any idea why he'd accepted a slightly lower margin for the latest job, just to have a reason to go see Mae-Lynn. They always seemed to know a lot more about him than he expected. He considered a moment, then decided to go on AIM. As he expected, Mae-Lynn was there and she IM'd him at the same time he messaged her. "Hi luver! Miss me?" "I do. Keeping those muscles warm?" "Not warm. Hot!!! Hot enuf to burn my prtty Rose!" "Sounds good." "I had a reelly tuff wrkout tday. I think just thnking bout you makes my mussels grow more. Im flexing them rite now." "Wish I could see them." "I wish I new how to do a webcam. Wait a minit." John trolled through Fistman's updates and then his message boards while he waited. "Get it?" She'd sent him an email with another new picture. Good thing she had a cable modem. She was sitting topless next to her computer, her nipple touching the screen where the AIM window was placed. Her hand was under the desk, her arm tensed to make her biceps bulge. Bulge wasn't really the word. Pop sounded feeble too. Her biceps just swelled. He stared at her picture, getting harder by the second. "You there?!!" "You're amazing!" "Your sweet. I wanta know what you think of that mussel." "It's stupendous, so big, so beautiful." She was typing a long time. "Im getting reely reely strong. My frends think Im being stupid, cause your so far away and men heer dont like girls with big mussels like I have. But I think my mussels ar strong enuf to bring us togethr. Do you think I Am being stupid? He was glad he wasn't there now. He typed quickly. "No. I'll be back as soon as I can work it out." "Im glad you left that Stacy. I new you wuldnt stay with her once you got used to me. Momma wuld be reely mad if I went away to NYC. Shes says its a reely bad place but im shur not the part were you liv. Are there a lotta girls there with big mussels?" "None like yours." "I have to go." "Why?" "Work." "OK. When is megco bringing you back agin?" "I don't know. I was just there. I'm working on it." "OK. I miss you. Dont wait too long so my mussles are bigger then yors. OK?" "I won't." "Too late. They are alreddy twice as big as yors! Ha-ha!!" He smiled at the thought and got hard all over again. She always said something like that in her emails too. "I kiss them all!" "Mmmmm! By my sweet rose." John closed the open windows and shifted in his seat. He hoped Stacy got home soon. He was MORE than ready for action. 13 "Jeannie! Jeannie! Look! Just LOOK at her!" Jeannie peered at the picture on the screen. She found it repulsive, the kind of build that a slave-woman would have. But that wasn't the point. "Look how BIG she is. There are 72 pictures of her, and each one is worse than the next!" Stacy moaned, her hysterical face an ugly mix of tears, red blotches and runny mascara. Jeannie stepped carefully over the logical impossibility of the remark and rested her hand lightly on Stacy's neck while she made sympathetic sounds to calm her friend. "Aww Jeannie. Maybe it's not what you think. Perhaps it's just a few pictures and ...." "It's NOT!! He's been seeing her every time he goes to Arkansas! And he told her we'd broken up! See? In her reply to this email!" Jeannie studied it. They sure looked like they were John's own words. She stood over Jeannie's shoulder as Jeannie called up the whole series of emails John had saved in his filing cabinet, over 50, most with pictures. "I'm so sorry, Jeannie. So sorry. Really," she said soothingly, stroking Stacy's hair while she waited to see where Stacy would go with this -- an angry vow to break up or tearful sobs while she wondered how to win back John's heart. Poor Stacy. She thought Stacy would still want John, but however Stacy felt, Jeannie would help her friend any way she could. "Did, uh, John just leave all this open on his computer?" Jeannie asked, curious. "No. Well, he hid it, but, um, part of my training, at my new job, was to learn how to find things on employee computers that they're not supposed to put there. People always use the same kinds of tricks, you know. I never would have found this stuff otherwise. So I thought about what you said about using my nose ... and my skills ... and he was away in Washington for a couple of days. And you know what ELSE I found?" Jeannie shook her head, worried about what was there but very curious nevertheless. "Videos! Stories! Even little plays!" Stacy was getting emotional again. "Plays? You mean, like on Broadway?" Stacy nodded. "Listen to this one!" She navigated through a few folders than clicked on a file. "So, uh, why do you want to interview me here at your house, Mr. Flower? What's wrong with your office?" "Well, you're new in this town, Stephanie. I don't like to work with unknowns. I want to get to know you better, make sure you're the kind of person I'd like to work with. So, tell me about yourself." "Well, ok. I'm a model, you know, and -- Stacy stopped it. "It's so weird! But now I can see where John gets some of his, uh --" She blushed bright red. "I don't get it," Jeannie said. "It sounds, I don't know, like a set-up for a pornographic play, but -- "No. Oh, I didn't play you the, you know, weird part. Listen." She played Jeannie the muscle transfer part. "See? This is stuff he fantasizes about." Jeannie stared at the computer. "Well ... it's ... interesting," she said. She was waiting for some kind of cue from Stacy. What did she want to do? Jeannie had seen and heard a lot of strange things, some much stranger even than this fantasy. But that wasn't the point, and anyway it wasn't something she would tell Stacy. "I mean ... if I'd known what John really wanted ... I don't know ... I would have pretended THIS for him. Instead, he's got this OTHER girl lifting weights like crazy to become his fantasy. And I think it's WORKING!" Stacy started crying again. "You still want him, don't you?" Jeannie asked, knowing the answer. But Stacy should say it, if that's the way she really felt. Stacy nodded. "Oh you must think I'm pathetic. And sick too!" She buried her head in her hands and sobbed. "I'm so embarrassed!" "No, Stacy, no! I'm the LAST person to judge YOU! You love him! So of course you'd do anything to please him. I understand that perfectly." She was still crying but said, "You do?? I thought you'd think I was a complete wimp! But I had to ... had to tell somebody ... and you're my best friend!!" "Oh, dear, dear Stacy. Why don't you take a bath and calm down? I won't go anywhere. Would you ... mind if I look at those emails again, and maybe those videos ... and that whole play. I want to try to understand John a little better. And then we can talk, ok?" "Will you stay over tonight? Here? John won't be back until tomorrow at least. I don't want to be by myself." "Of course, Stacy. Now show me how to do what you did and then draw yourself a hot bath and get comfortable. OK?" Stacey sniffled and did as Jeannie asked, then gave her a big hug and thanks and went off to do as Jeannie suggested. Jeannie sighed. She reread John's emails. listened to the play and watched a dozen videos of muscular women flexing. Then she read a few stories. Most were appallingly bad, but she found some of them amusing, especially the ones involving magic. Suddenly the computer emitted a noise and then the same noise again. She closed some of the windows and clicked on a blinking box. "U ther? Rosey?" Jeannie recognized the name of the woman from the emails. She giggled and typed "Yes. I'm here." "Miss me luvr?" Jeannie listened carefully. Stacy was still in the bath. She turned down the volume switch on the speaker and then typed. "Oh yes! I miss you and your great big muscles." "You do? I wrked two hours on my big arms today, making them bigger and bigger for you." "I love that." "I no you do. Im flxng them rite now for you. Their so big they rip my sleves." "Wow." "Their bigger and stronger than yors. Much bigger." "Really?" There was a delay. Jeannie wondered if she'd said the wrong thing and given something away. "Ar we playing or reel?" Jeannie thought quickly. "Real. But just for a minute." "OK Then no. Of corse not. Yor my big strong man." "You wouldn't want me to be weaker than you?" "Oh no Jonny. You know that." "Just checking. Can we go back to playing now?" "Momma's out so we can do what ever you want." There was a pause. Then another message. "Are you tuching yorself?" Jeannie wanted to burst out laughing but she resisted. "Yes." "You want to no what IM donig?" "Yes." "I can tell yor tipig with one hand :) yor ansers are so short." Jeannie smiled. Perfect. "You know what I want?" "Shur I do. Im rite ther sweettie. with you in yor cosy room. Im walkin up to you. You have yor close on but Im gonna rip them off. You cant stop me. Im to strong." "Right." "Ssshh. Dont interup. honny. Just do what you want to do." Jeannie resisted the temptation to type "OK." and sat back, letting Maelynn83's words scroll down. "Yor mussels are just too littl to stop me. See? You try to hold me back but you cant." "Im so strong. I ript the shirt off of yor back and rassle you off of yor chair." "Im holding you down. with one arm only its all i need. cause im so strong. so stronger then my littl rose!" "You cant beleev how big my mussels got. And how hard. They practicly burst out of my arms." Curiosity got the better of her, and Jeannie typed, "Tell me how you got so strong." "There like mellons you want to -- haha. you want to do that part agan? ok. I like to giv you what you want." "remember you used tobe stronger then me? when we first met. but theres a magic connection betwen you and me ever since we made luv cause of whats in yor hart." "it was yor secret wish and mine to. you cant controle it now. you cant stop it. you try to get stronger but yor strenth just goes to me. its yor mussels going to me that makes me so strong." "part of you still wants to be strong. but you cant be anymor and you cant help luving my strenth and the mor you luv it the stronger I get." "look how big my bicepts are. so much bigger then yors. 3 times as big and rock hard to. I can pik you up with one arm and crush you aginst my big boobs. all you can do is suck them." "im so big an musclar that you cant even put yor arms all the way round my back. you try but theres too much big hard mussel" There was a pause. "You stil ther honny?" Jeannie smiled. "Don't stop. I want you to get stronger." "Heh heh. Shur honny." "Yor so turnd on by my mussels I can feel it happning agan. Im getting more of yor strenth. My mussels are growing. My arms are even bigger. And yors are shrinkng. And getting softer." "Yor getting so skinny and soft without yor mussel. I can rap one arm round you and press you aginst me. you cant beleev my power but you reely luv it." "you luv my mussels. I flex my bicept aginst yor cheek so you can feel how hard it is. its as big as yor face." Jeannie had read enough. So this was John's thing. Well! She wondered if Stacy ever seen one of those dialogues. Maelynn83 wasn't much of a writer, that was for sure. Jeannie wondered how the author of her favorite book, "The 1001 Nights," would have done with this theme, but she'd never know. He'd been dead a long time and no one was not going to bring him back. Well, she knew just what she was going to do. She typed, "Oh God! That was great!" There was a pause. "Any time honny. Are you feeling relaxd?" Jeannie sat there and let some time go by. She heard Stacy splashing, the water still dripping in the bath. She still had enough time before Stacy would be out. "Honny? Are you ther?" Jeannie took a deep breath and typed "I'll be over soon Sam. I just need to get rid of that dumb hillbilly I told you about. She's a good fuck but I'll have to drop her. She thinks I'm going to bring her to NY! Well, it doesn't look like I'll be going back to Arkansas anytime soon anyway so she won't be much use to me." Jeannie counted to ten. Then twenty. Then she typed. "Just kidding, sweetie," as if John had noticed his mistake and was trying to get out of it. "You peece of shit! That was reel what you rote to somwon els. I hate you. HATE YOU!!!!!!!" And she signed off. She wasn't sure how Maelynn83 would react if John started emailing her, wondering why she wasn't sending him pictures anymore. Jeannie guessed she probably would ignore him, but she might not. Just to be sure maybe Stacy would know a way to stop the emails or mess up John's AIM account. Unless .... Stacy looked around and found John's spam control. It wasn't hard to add Maelynn83 to the list of blocked addresses. Now she didn't have to tell Stacy exactly what she'd done. Jeannie closed the AIM program, eliminating the chat window for good. She curled up in the chair, holding her knees against her chest, tucked her chin under her arms and closed her eyes and bobbed her chin. It was her coziest position. Her plans didn't always work out the way she expected. But they were always fun. She breathed deeply and slowly for a couple of minutes to calm herself down, then got up to get Stacy out of the bath. She was getting hungry. "Stacy! You all right in there?" "Yeah," she said after a short delay. "Just thinking." "Me too. And I was thinking about dinner too." "I don't think I'm hungry." Jeannie pushed open the door and stood next to the bath. She put her hand on Stacy's wet wrist and pulled her up. "Hey, come on. I bet you're hungrier than you think. How are you going to build up your body if you don't keep eating?" "Oh, I don't know Jeannie. What's the point? I'll never look like that Maelynn girl." "Of course not. You'll look like Stacy, but a more muscular Stacy. Don't give up. You're on the right track. You saw the pictures of her that he was saving. Be inspired. You just have to keep plugging away at it. Unless you believe some kind of magic is going to help you." Stacy sighed. "I wish it would. You really think I shouldn't just break up with him?" "It's not what I think. It's what you want. And I'm here to help. I just took care of Maelynn for you." "You did?!! How?" Jeannie put her arm around Stacy. "Well, when you were checking out all his secret accounts on his computer and you signed onto his AIM account, right?" "Yeah, and I saw Maelynn83 was on his buddy list. The only one. He must use that screen name only for chatting with her." "Uh-huh. So, you know how they say no one knows you're a dog on the internet? Well, no one knows you're Jeannie either. It's like magic. Maelynn83 signed on while you were in the bath, and let's just say she got a message from 'John' that she didn't really like. I don't think she'll want to see John ever again." "That's so sneaky! Jeannie! I'm surprised at you!" "Well, it's done. Are you going to write her back and tell her it wasn't really John?" Stacy shook her head slowly. "OK then. Come on, Jeannie. 'All's fair in love and war,' you know. Hey, when we're done he would have broken up with her anyway, so it's just as well it's done sooner rather than later." "I guess so. I would never have done a thing like that though, Jeannie." "That's why I did it." Stacy laughed. "I never KNEW you could be so BAD, Jeannie!" Jeannie didn't want to answer that. "Please can we have dinner Jeannie. I promise we can talk about John ALL during dinner if you want. But I'm VERY hungry." "OK. Since you keep talking about food I guess I am too. I did have a workout before I came here and it always gives me an appetite. I'll get dressed quick and then I need to make sure we haven't left any traces on John's computer. You won't believe the tricks I've learned working in IT. I'm as BAD as you, I guess." Jeannie smiled. "No way!" 14 The day's meetings had gone well, and John finally felt sure that the going through the extra bureaucracy and FBI clearances he had needed to do work for the Department of Homeland Security would pay off. Most of his competitors wouldn't be bothered to do it, and he could now foresee a long series of contracts at better prices for basically the same work. They needed a steady, security-cleared supplier, and as long as he didn't get too greedy they would have little interest in qualifying his competitors either. And unlike MeGaCo, the Feds wouldn't go to the end of the Earth to steal his secrets and bleed him dry. He had briefly considered returning home on the evening shuttle, but an opportunity for dinner and some drinks with a contact in the Defense Department proved more important. Now it was 10. He was checked in at an airport hotel. He had no change of clothes but he would be home by 8:30 tomorrow. Nothing to do but check his email and go to sleep. Odd that Mae-Lynn didn't send him anything today. She wasn't online either. Too bad. He'd have Stacy around tomorrow. The next morning he woke up early but felt out of sorts and went back to sleep. The next thing he knew it was 11:15. Eleven fifteen! He shook his head to clear the cobwebs and the room spun. His head was pounding. Oh great. What a morning to get the flu! He took a couple of aspirin and hobbled to the shower. His whole body ached. The needles of hot water felt good for awhile, but as soon as he got out his body started shaking with chills. He wrapped himself in towels and quickly thought about what to do. He would feel awful traveling like this; on the other hand, he'd rather be in his own apartment than ride out the flu in a hotel. He got dressed quickly, checked out and made his way to the shuttle, shivering all the way. The trip was an trial. He didn't remember the last time he'd felt so sick, probably not since before he had left home for university. His bag felt as though it weighed a ton and he started perspiring heavily from the moment he left his room. Even hoisting his bag into the overhead storage rack was difficult, and as soon he he'd landed it inside he felt a shooting pain that spread from his shoulder across his back. He hadn't hurt those muscles so badly since he'd offered, for the sake of avoiding a forfeiture, to wrestle in the top weight class at the State Tournament in High School and Rocky McGurk had twisted him into knots. Just what he needed. He settled gingerly into the aisle seat and almost cried out in pain each time he had to get up to let someone past. By the time the plane landed in New York he was feeling even worse. The passengers in the aisle waited impatiently while he struggled to get his bag down again without hurting his back even more. Finally the woman behind him rolled her eyes and lifted it down for him. He took it gratefully and pulled it down the aisle, red-faced and dizzy. By the time he reached his apartment at 3:30 pm he was exhausted and collapsed on top of his bed and slept soundly until Stacy came home from her workout at seven and cried out, "John! John! What's wrong?" He rolled over. "I feel awful, Stacy. I have the flu and I hurt my back." "Oh you poor man! What can I get you? Soup?" He shook his head, then changed his mind. "Maybe that would be nice. I haven't eaten anything all day." "You HAVE to eat! Let me help you get undressed and into bed and then I'll make you chicken soup. That's supposed to help right?" He stood up shakily and started taking off his clothes. "I guess." He winced. "Let me pull those off. Ooooh, you're so hot," she said. "I'll help you put these on. I'll be right back. Just get into bed." When she returned with the soup John was already asleep and he slept through until the next morning. Stacy gave him breakfast then went off to work and made him promise to call when he woke up. But he was still sleeping when she got back after the gym, and other than a few short breaks for soup or oatmeal it was the same until his fever finally broke in the middle of the following week. Stacy was at the apartment with him as much as she could be, but she didn't see any reason to stop going to the gym since he mostly slept. She was just as determined as ever to mould her body into John's ideal type and it was encouraging that the better shape she was in, the more exercise she seemed to be able to do. She was eating more too, although still not as much as Jeannie did, and for the first time in her life it all was going in the right places. Stacy wasn't as proud of her surveillance activities. Now that she had broken into his email account once she felt less guilty about doing it again. With John sleeping all the time, she started checking his email account once a day, and then twice. She saw with some satisfaction that Maelynn83 had sent him just one email since Jeannie did whatever she'd done to discourage her. It said, "You hurt me so much. Yore really bad, you know. I keep expecting you to apologize (see my spelling's better?) but you don't right. Why are you so mean to me?" Stacy thought a moment, but realized she didn't know what Jeannie had said, so she just deleted it and wrote back. "I'm not sorry. I was just being honest. I should have said it before." That was four days ago, and there hadn't been another email since. By the next Wednesday John was getting out of bed for most of the day, but he didn't have the energy to do much more than answer the emails that had piled up and then do some light surfing. But his heart, and more importantly his cock, wasn't in it. He still felt too weak to have much interest. Instead he watched television for awhile in whatever position hurt his back the least and then went back to bed. When Stacy got home he felt well enough to sit with her in the kitchen, although he still didn't have much of an appetite. "John! It's so great you're out of bed again." "Yeah. I still feel like shit though." "Uh-huh." She was nearly finished with her plate, while John had barely touched his. That was ok. If he wasn't that hungry he wouldn't mind if she took more. "You'll be better soon. It always takes a while to get your strength back after the flu." "You're lucky you didn't get it." "Yeah But I feel so bad for you! Did you get into your work emails today?" "Yeah. There wasn't anything too bad. Some of my clients were pissed that I didn't answer emails for a few days, but I'll be able to patch it up. I just have to get going with my Homeland Security project. So, you've been spending a lot of time at the gym?" "Yeah. I'm SO glad I started on that. I'm enjoying it so much! I can see now why you always spent so much time working out. Why, yesterday I -- what's wrong, John?!!" John had grimaced sharply. He twisted his body to relieve the pain. "It's my back. I hurt it lifting my bag on the day I came down with the flu, and it's still giving me trouble. Damn!" "Oh, you poor dear! Can I give you a back rub?" "Well I...." "You know I give really good massages. I got a lot of practice when I had my job at the Hyatt Spa." "That's the job you quit when one of the guests kept hitting on you?" "Uh-huh." She wiped her mouth, sated. "C'mon. Let me try." John looked at his plate, still half-full. He had no desire for another bite. "Sure, why not?" He couldn't possibly feel any worse. They went to the bedroom and he lay down while Stacy took some oil and rubbed it on her hands and then on his back. She ran her hands up and down his trapezious muscles and worked with her fingers. "That's not where --" "Ssshhh. Just relax. Let me work on you." He closed his mouth. Her fingers did feel good. She was kneading his muscles, squeezing and pushing them, digging into them. He was feeling more relaxed. His mind started to wander a little. She has strong fingers. She must have done this a lot. It's a nice thing to know how to do. If he'd known she was so good, he'd have asked for massages a long time ago. Yes, this was nice. His own masseuse, living here. A nice idea. He was really relaxing now. He could almost go to sleep. But then he'd miss the feeling. Of her fingers on his shoulders. On his back .... "That's more like it. You're getting relaxed. Your muscles are feeling looser. Softer." She laughed, remembering how her arms had gotten into such good shape when she had worked at the Hyatt. Hey, this would be a good complement for her exercise at the gym. Then she had another idea. "Hey John. I just had funny thought. You up for a little, you know, play?" "Mmmmm?" he said. Her voice was very pleasant. His back felt much better. Play? Yeah. Sounds nice. "Mmmmm hmmmm." She laughed again. "OK. Yeah, I like doing this. Getting you all relaxed. All comfy. You know I like to please you. I know how to please you. What makes you happy. Your muscles were so stiff when I started. So tight. All tense and hard. Do you feel how my fingers relax them? Digging deeper and deeper inside. I can do that as your muscles relax and get softer for me." She shifted her hands. "There. See? I start on your shoulders. Then your back." She worked on his back for awhile, then his upper arms. "Such big, strong muscles, but so tense. So hard. See how I relax them. Isn't that better? Like magic, isn't it? Magic in my fingers. My strong fingers." "Mmmmm," John murmured. Yes. Magic fingers. Haven't felt so good in a week. "You like that? You like the way my fingers feel against your muscles. Relaxing them. Softening them. The more I work on them the easier it gets. Do you notice that?" "Mmmmm." Yes. She was very good. "Almost as if your muscles weren't as strong. As if you were getting weaker. Or I was getting stronger. Or both." She paused while her fingers worked on his arms more vigorously, then shifted to his thighs. "Doesn't that feel good?" Yes, very .... What was she saying? She was getting stronger? Whatever it was, her fingers were sending tingling sensations throughout his body. Despite his illness, his weakness, he was getting turned on, the tingles resonating in his growing cock. Semi-consciously, he shifted his position slightly to make more room for it. She noticed his arousal. This was amazing, how this idea affected him so. "Yeah, I can even see it now. It's like a river of your muscle flowing up my arm then spreading out. Your muscle finding its place, its new home, in my body. My muscle now. My strength. You can feel it in my fingers. How easily they press your muscles. As your muscles get softer and weaker. Don't you feel more relaxed? Can you feel yourself getting weaker?" His mind was swimming back toward consciousness. "Weaker," she said? He was feeling weak. Her fingers felt so strong. What was she saying about his muscles? She liked the way her forearms and biceps were bulging as she pressed and squeezed his muscles. She didn't have muscles like this when she had worked in that health club, or even at the beginning of the year. She should definitely work this into her exercise routine -- if he liked it. He certainly was fully erect now. She poured it on, both physically and in speech. "Yours are getting so soft now. So small. As mine grow. Larger and larger. Harder and harder. I'm the stronger one now. I'm SO much stronger. My muscles really bulge as I squeeze your little ones, your soft little muscles. They're so cute now!" He tried to rouse himself. Little muscles? Cute muscles? What was she talking about? He WAS feeling weak. Like his muscles were being drained of all their energy. She was almost hurting him. "Hey! What are you -- "Ssshh. It's almost -- "My muscles! You can't be --" Like he was waking up from a nightmare he twisted violently to face her and stop her. "Aggghh! My back!" he cried. "Oww! Oww!" "John! What is it?" "Get away! Stay away! Stay away from me!" "But John, I -- He looked down at his body. "Oh god! What a dream!" He straightened slightly. "Owww!" "You must have hurt your back when you got up so suddenly." "What was all that crap about taking my muscles?" She looked stricken. "John! That was a game, a little fantasy." He stared at her. "I told you. And you said to go ahead. Or something like that." "I what?" He tried to get up and then winced at the sharp pain. "It was supposed to be just like the --" she stopped suddenly. She almost let it slip that she'd listened to the fantasy audio on his computer. "Like what?" he groaned, clutching at his back. "Like, uh, the fantasies we do when we make love. You know." She was very unhappy. "Oh John! I'm so sorry I startled you like that. You looked like you were enjoying it." John was too embarrassed to admit he had been and had just gotten confused in his half-sleep. He could vaguely remember both the massage, and her little act, and they HAD been making him feel very good. But he was in agony. Best not to answer. "Well, now my back is absolutely killing me." "Maybe if you lie down and I try to loosen -- It sounded like a great idea, but pride got in the way. "No! Not now!" She looked very hurt. "I'm sorry, babe. I just ... don't feel like it right now." He stood up, bent over half to the side. "I think I should just get into bed." Poor John. He looked really pathetic. Stacy wanted to do something but her hands fluttered helplessly. He didn't want her even near him. Everything was going wrong! "I'm so sorry!" she said, starting to cry. "I was just trying to make you feel better! I thought you wanted me to!" "Stacy, Stacy," he said. I'm just ... not better yet. OK? It was a great massage. Really. I'd better lie down." He turned and moved slowly back to the bedroom while Stacy watched. 15 John's back was no better the next day, nor the next. Stacy tried to give him a massage on the third day, but even that was painful. By the fourth day he could walk around, but only very slowly, and any attempt to lift or carry anything produced immediate, excruciating pain. And the flu seemed to linger forever. Even a week later, even a walk to Central Park still left him winded. John knew there was little to do about the aftermath of the flu. But the pain was another thing. Finally he went to the doctor and after X-rays, an MRI and several consultations with specialists his GP gave him a tentative verdict: spondylolysis. John had never heard of it before, and even the doctors didn't all agree on it or on the appropriate treatment. The first doctor said there was really nothing he could do. He would have to let it heal, slowly, through rest, and then work on strengthening his back muscles to compensate for the apparent genetic defect (or feature, as one of the silver-tongued specialists suggested) that made his spine somewhat less balanced than it should be. He went for a second opinion, and that doctor questioned the diagnosis, suggesting it was only simple muscle spasms, and that while exercise would never hurt, it wouldn't have any particular benefit for stopping muscle spasms in the future. Since at the moment, nothing was healing and he couldn't resume his exercise anything, all the disagreement just angered John. "But why now? Why is it bothering me all of a sudden? I've been playing sports my whole life!" John complained to his regular GP, who he'd been seeing every since he'd moved to New York. Dr. Gary Milner was just a few years older than John and was comfortable speaking plainly to him. The doctor shrugged. "It happens to all of us, John. What are you, 28? Our bodies don't last forever. You're still very much in your prime of course, but these little kinks that didn't matter at age 15, 20, 25, do start to turn up, more of them every year, I'm afraid. You're in great shape, and that will help your recovery. My own view, although I'm not a specialist in this area, is that once this heals I'm sure you'll be able to go back to all your old activity -- except the football, John. I wouldn't advise that because of the possible further injury to your back from repeated impacts. Do you play golf?" John glared at him. Golf was an old man's game. "No! And I don't plan to learn, Gary." "Good. The twisting motion wouldn't be good for you either. But I have to say I think the first opinion was the right one. When you're ready for physio, we'll give you some special exercises. That will help. And Yoga or Pilates." John made a face. "Right. Well, the back exercises will help. Before you know it you'll be back at the gym!" John nodded and thanked his doctor. He straightened slowly and left, wincing as he entered and left the taxicab on the trip home. 16 February -- Year 3 The months that followed were some of the most difficult John had ever faced. Although the general feeling of weakness from the flu passed eventually, his back pain lingered. He had to turn down several profitable jobs, including important engagements at Homeland Security, because travel was too painful. After he found out that the Department had qualified another consultant he made an appointment to meet his contacts to try to keep the job, but he was in so much pain during the meeting that it did nothing to convince them he would be a reliable service provider. Even worse, the trip to D.C. alone likely set back his recovery by several weeks. And despite the doctor's encouragement, or perhaps because of his overeagerness to resume normal activity, the pain kept returning whenever he did anything strenuous. Only after a month of nearly complete rest was he well enough to start physiotherapy. And that program was far from satisfying. His therapist, an older woman named Adiba Muselhi, seemed overly conservative and discouraged him from setting his hopes too high. The back, leg and stomach exercises she gave him did nothing for his upper body or for his fitness level generally, and she was very strict in warning him not to attempt any other exercise until his back muscles were strong enough. Naturally after a week without too much pain he disobeyed her instructions and went back to the gym. It took just three curls for him to collapse onto the floor in pain, and that set him back yet another month before he could start his back exercises again, which he would be allowed to do only with permission from his doctor. It wasn't very hard for him to detect the note of triumph in her voice when he told her what had happened. Stacy was completely sympathetic, but there were only a few things she could do to help. She couldn't help him with his work. She couldn't speed his healing. And it was hard to put up with his frustration and anger and try to make him see that as bad as things were, they were at least a teeny bit better when she was around. For a while John refused to let her give him more massages, then he relented gradually when she proved how good she could be at easing the back spasms. His grumpy mood and inactivity had greatly reduced his libido, but Stacy found that playing the little "script" she had tried with the first massage almost always did the trick and soon it became their main gateway into sex. Although Stacy was a bit disappointed at his loss of initiative, it had its positive side. For one, this new development gave her a lot of control over their sex life. Also, although she didn't really want to admit it, she was starting to enjoy the "role" John had assigned to her, as a woman who could "absorb" his strength. It wasn't something she would have chosen by herself. But, as with her new responsibilities at work, she was fashioning a new image of herself as a strong and capable woman. She liked that person, and she was gaining confidence that once John healed and got back to his normal patterns of work and exercise -- and sex -- he would like that person too. After all, it wasn't as if she WANTED to take over his role in bed or take away his muscle and power. She was just doing what came naturally. But then, there was also a supernatural excitement to it: the idea that she could "magically" grow stronger by touching John's muscles was developing into a turn-on for her too. Not that she would ever admit that to John. Stacy felt that their relationship had entered into a new, better phase, even though it felt a little strange at times. She knew John was having a tough time, and she felt a little guilty that his misfortunes were somehow linked to her feeling better about herself and their relationship. But it wasn't as though she was being selfish. She wanted what was best for both of them, and for them as a couple. She was grateful that they were adapting, coping with his temporary disability and finding new ways of being together. That's what you had to do in a long term relationship, in a marriage. Surely that must mean as much to him as it did to her, that notwithstanding their difficulties, there was enough of a bond between them that they could grow and even become closer, no matter what happened. Still, even apart from the challenges she felt she was surmounting in their relationship, Stacy knew she was growing as a person. One of the things that role-playing did for her was to allow her to imagine herself in a different way. She was a firm believer in the power of thought. Her mother had been ill when Stacy was a teenager, and Stacy had gone with her to classes on visualizing health. Shortly after the classes had begun Stacy's mother started improving, and ever since Stacy had believed that visualizing something could bring her halfway to actually doing it. Now, while she massaged John's muscles and pretended to be an evil succubus who had wormed her way into the palace of the enemy king and was secretly leaching his muscle, his muscle tone, even his very ability to build muscle, she was visualizing herself as growing stronger and more muscular. And these images carried over to her now daily sessions at the gym, where she continued to make more progress than she'd ever dreamed possible. Of course she noticed that John's muscle tone and even the size of his muscles were in fact decreasing. She didn't say anything to him about that either. He no doubt noticed it and she was sure that was part of what was upsetting him. Admitting that she noticed it too would just make it worse for him, because there was nothing he could do about it until his back was completely healed and he could start his normal exercises again. The last thing Stacy wanted him to do was to go back to the gym too soon. He'd just end up hurting himself all over again and make everything worse. At times, it also occurred to her that the fantasy and visualization could be having the same effect on John, in reverse. But then, there was another more obvious explanation for the changes in his body: his lack of exercise. Besides, visualization was a technique that she believed in and used. John didn't. Once when shortly after they'd met she started telling him about it, he had just dismissed it as typical feminine emotional logic. At the time Stacy had felt a bit hurt, but now, with her added confidence, she decided that his was simply a typical male reaction. All she knew, and cared about, was that it worked for her. And no doubt once he got back to the gym the things that worked for him before would work for him again. 17 May -- Year 3 "Well, look who's here. I thought you'd become one of those guys who take advantage of our one-month specials and then never come again." "Don't be an asshole, Gustaf. You know I hurt my back." Gustaf planted himself in front of John. "Yeah, yeah. That's what I heard. Well, we're gonna need a note from your doctor before you start lifting. Club policy. You know those lawyers." He crossed his thick arms in front of his chest and smirked. John glared at him. "I suppose I shouldn't say this, but I DO know my assholes." He pulled out the letter he had pried from a very reluctant Ms. Muselhi, and only if he promised to build up very gradually. Yeah, right! "Here jerkface. A letter from my physiotherapist. And no bullshit. I know the club accepts letters from her because they have before." Gustaf looked at it. "I'll have to run it by the office but, yeah, it looks ok." He looked John up and down. "You better take it easy the first day though, if you know what's good for you. You don't exactly look like you're in peak condition. Not like your girlfriend." "I'm fine. Just make sure you keep the machines oiled, Gustaf. See you." John walked away. Damn that Gustaf and his smirk. Didn't he have anything better to do than watch him? John stood in front of the array of machines. Ah, back at last! But the last thing he wanted was to show Gustaf that he was going to reduce his weights, at least at first. He knew he should. But there was no way he wanted to do it in front of Gustaf. And Gustaf probably knew that, which is why he was standing there, observing him. What an asshole. John did a few warm-ups, a few stretches. He couldn't wait all day. He started with some work on his legs. Wow! He HAD gone backwards. He managed just three reps at his usual weight before his legs gave out. He stretched a bit more. He'd really need a Stacy-massage after this workout. He smiled. One of her "special" ones. She really knew how to get him hot, and she seemed to get into the little game more and more as the months went by. She was pretty inventive about making up stories for them, more so than he would have guessed when they'd first met. She ought to try writing some stories for Diana's site. Yeah, right! He tried some situps, without using added resistance. He'd been doing a lot of them to strengthen his back muscles, although not on the incline, and he felt a twinge after the fifth one so he stopped. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Gustaf eyeing him and grimaced. Well, fuck him. He did a few more stretches and then sat down in front of the station for two-arm curling. This was always his favorite exercise, the one that really made his biceps pop. He looked down at his arms now with some distaste. He hated the way his biceps had softened after the months of inactivity. It was going to take a lot of time and work to get them back to the way they were. He thought about Stacy's arms. It was amazing the way she was developing. She had almost nothing when they first started going out. Now she could probably hold her own in any fitness competition, maybe even a lightweight bodybuilding one. She had these hard little balls of muscle that really stood out on her slender frame, and they had a nice expansion and even a little peak. Like a smaller version of his. The thought fluttered into his mind, "like his had been," and then he pushed it out. No way. He still had good biceps. He just had to work on firming them up again. Thinking about her arms was making him hard, but it wasn't really the time for that now. Especially in his exercise shorts. With Gustaf lingering nearby he set the weight -- to the usual amount -- grasped the bar and slowly tensed his arms to bring it up. It was hard! He gripped it more tightly and lifted and -- his whole back EXPLODED in pain. "AAAGGHHH!" he said, unable to stop from saying out loud his cry of torment. He dropped the weights with a loud clang and then he fell over onto the floor. All activity stopped in the room and all eyes turned to him. Gustaf hustled over. "Hey!! John! What was that!!" He looked down at him, making sure it hadn't been a heart attack or something, then looked at the machine. "Idiot! I TOLD you to lighten the weights!" John closed his eyes in pain. It was all he could do to stop himself from moaning out loud. "Back, back everybody. Nothing to see. Just some guy who hasn't been working out regularly overdoing it. Happens all the time." John grit his teeth. "Damn you Gustaf!" he muttered. The spasms slowly ebbed and he stood up, half bent. "Looks like we're gonna need another letter John. Hmmm?" Gustaf sneered. "Maybe you need some better physio." John staggered away slowly, trying to ignore the stares from the other gym rats. A long hot shower in the locker room dulled the pain, and by the time he was dressed he felt almost normal again. He tentatively tried a few movements. It was nowhere near as bad as it had been before. He almost wanted to go back to the weight room to try a few more exercises. But not with Gustaf there. He'd have to go back to physio, get checked out again, get another fucking letter. What a disaster! 18 "That must have been horrible!" Stacy exclaimed. "And you had been looking forward so much to getting back to the gym! How long are you going to have to wait now?" John looked at her glumly. "At least three weeks. I need more X-rays first, rest, and then she wants to monitor my exercise, so we have to book a slot at a clinic that can measure the stress the lifting puts on my back. It seems like overkill to me. I just tried to do too much the first day." Stacy put her hand on his shoulder sympathetically. "I know. But I guess you have to do it. The club won't let you use the weight room without another letter from her, will they?" "Sure as hell not. Damn them and that Gustaf." Stacy nodded. "I bet you want a massage, huh honey? A special one?" "I don't know. Yeah, maybe." Stacy was already stripping off her sweater and loosening up. "You know, my back already is feeling better. Maybe I didn't hurt it that badly this time" He stretched and bent down tentatively. "It's amazing, but it doesn't hurt at all now." "That's great, honey!" John looked at her. "You are really getting muscular, you know that?" She looked down at her upper arm a bit bashfully, wondering if he wanted to see her flex her biceps. It had been a while since she'd shown them off for him. Certainly a long while since he'd asked her to, when she'd just started working out. Yet more than once when they were making love his hands found their way to her upper arms, squeezing them as he worked their bodies to their orgasms. He was still so good in bed, even though his back was even now not completely healed. She really was very lucky to have him. Even if the slump in his business didn't end. Funny how, even with him getting her to act out his fantasies, he was shy about asking to see her biceps for real. She had a feeling he looked at them on the sly. She bet that he looked out of the corner of his eye while she was drying or brushing her hair in the morning after her shower. Or while she hooked her bra and put on her jewelery. Usually he was still in bed sleeping when she was getting ready in the morning, but she felt sometimes he was just pretending. More than once she'd spotted his eyes open, watching her. That always gave her a thrill -- that he found her body interesting enough to sneak a look. And she made sure always to reward him with an extra flex or two later in the morning, making it seem accidental. That's probably what she should do now. Jeannie always told her men got more out of a second of what they weren't supposed to see than an hour of what they felt they could see at any time. Jeannie was so wise -- like she was 28 centuries old rather than 28 years! Anyway, it was probably for the best not to show John too much of her biceps just now -- anything more than a quick flex -- until he started working out again. She wasn't really sure how he'd react if he really had a close look. They'd gotten a LOT bigger with all the exercise she'd been doing, after all, and with John not able to really work out, he might start to feel just a little bit bad about it -- whatever his fantasies were. Of course, she knew just how big HIS were from giving him his massages. She knew well that they weren't what they used to be. Not in size. Not in hardness. And most likely not in strength. "Oh, I don't know," she replied. "You know that even when girls work out they don't get really big. Not like guys do." John looked at her closely, his eyes dropping down for a quick peak at the bulges in her upper arms. "Yeah, I guess not." He stripped to his shorts and lay on the massage table he had bought. Already he was tingling with anticipation. What would Stacy come up with this time? More than once he had thought of himself as the Sultan in the 1001 Nights, with Stacy as a modern-day, imaginative Scheherazade. Stacy smiled. How open he was to her. How natural it all was. How "domestic." Like it would go on forever. She planned her session, her hands probing his muscles while her mind sorted through story lines, balancing the familiar and the unexpected, the themes she knew would entertain and arouse him and the plot that would make it new all over again. Dear John. His bodybuilder's build was long gone. He was still bigger than most men, but his muscle had lost its definition, the quality of being separate from his body, with its own life and energy. She rubbed his lats and shoulders lovingly. It was him she was massaging now, not his muscles. Did he know that? Did he understand? She doubted it. It wasn't the kind of thing a man would feel. He'd know the size of his muscles, how hard they felt, how much he could lift. He might even know the same about her -- if she ever told him. Which she wouldn't. Not in a thousand years. Except in a story. In the stories she told him again and again without his really understanding, but the stories aroused him, connected him to her. They were stories he never seemed to tire of. She hoped he never would. "So," she said, rubbing his muscles, "I bet you had a really tough game today." "Uh-huh," he said with a contented sigh. He never had to think too much in these scenarios. He just had to agree. "I was watching the whole game on my little TV, in my little studio apartment. Not like this place, with all your bedrooms, your home media center, your own weight machines, and all your fancy things. I guess that's what you get from being such a good athlete, from being a star." "That's right," he mumbled. He liked that idea. She was so good at this. "You make three million a year -- that's what the papers say -- and you can have any girl you want. They can't resist you. Not just because you're rich and famous, but also because of your gorgeous body. They love your huge, powerful muscles. They make a girl feel so safe, so well-protected. Like nothing bad could ever happen to her while she's with you. Girls like to feel safe, you know, 'cause all kinds of things can happen to girls. And they're so weak compared to men, especially compared to men like you. There's nothing a girl could do to protect herself from a man as strong as you are." "I guess not, but ...." "Sssshh. I'm sure you would never take advantage of a girl, never use your strength to hurt her. Right?" "That's right. Absolutely." He was already getting hard, anticipating where she was going with this. "You must have worked hard for this body, lifting weights, running, eating right. You must feel you deserve it, deserve the admiration you get." "Well, sure. I mean, it's my body." "Sure it is." She was working on his shoulders and his arms now, poor John. "But still, you have an advantage. You're a man. A woman could work out as hard as you, harder even, and still not get nearly as strong." "No. I guess not." "I'm strong, you know. You have to be, even as a woman, to be a good masseuse. I was an athlete in school too, like you, the best in my school in fact, but while the guys got full scholarships for football and basketball, they never gave as much to girls. Not where I grew up. Besides, my Dad, he always discouraged me. Just when I was getting good he decided he wouldn't even let me work out. Made me quit sports senior year. He said I was getting muscles, and a girl shouldn't have muscles that showed." "Aww, that's too bad. I like muscles on a girl." Funny how easily he admitted that now, at least to Stacy. "Oh really?" She was pleased he just came out and said that. But it didn't go with the story. "But I bet in high school, in college, you never dated a girl with muscles. You probably looked for soft girls with big titties. Huh?" "Well ... yeah. I guess." "And even now, would you date a girl with muscles as big as yours? No. Not AS big. Bigger! How would you feel, knowing she was the one with the power? If she was the one who had to protect you? Because you were weak, so weak that anyone in a crowd could jostle you, push you over, take away what little you could carry, bend your soft little arms backward if he or she -- yes she -- wanted to." Stacy knew she was piling it on thick, but lately John seemed to like it that way. And she could see by the way he was laying on the table that he was as fully aroused as he could be. Oh good! She was getting so good at this! "I -- "Sshh! I'm sorry. I'm supposed to relax you and here I am, getting you all worked up. Now you relax, Mr. All Star. Let me take care of you like you deserve. You've had a hard day, working that body, those muscles so hard. Now you can relax them, make them soft, hmmm? That's it. All soft and relaxed. And I can help. I can make them all soft for you, right?" John's dick was throbbing with desire. He wanted to pull her down on top of him right then. But he couldn't. Not now. Not when she was just getting to the good part. "Yeah, right," he replied. Suddenly she gripped his biceps very firmly. "Make them soft," she said quietly, fervently, almost like a prayer, and playing along John did as she said. "That's right," she continued in the same tone. "That's right. So soft, so weak," she said even more quietly. A chill went down his spine. He turned slightly, worried that any pressure on his dick would make him come. "Good. Very good." John waited. Where was she going with this? He thought he knew but he wanted to hear her say it. "Now. Can you feel it? Can you feel the change? Can you feel the difference? 'Cause now I have what I wanted. And you don't. Now I have the strength of a man. And not just any man. I have the strength of the most powerful runner in football. And you don't! Look at my muscles! How they bulge even before I begin to flex them. They look even bigger on me than they did on you! What, you say? You don't believe me? Just try to flex your biceps! See? No matter what you do, your arms stay small and soft. Ha! Look at you strain your pathetic arms. Nothing happens! Now look at mine! Look how my proud biceps bunch up and rise high! And not just my biceps. I've got hard bulging muscle all over. And the strength that goes with it!" Stacy felt hot too, just thinking of her body like that, so strong. Not that her arms were anything to be ashamed of now, but she loved imagining the reality of the strength she gave herself in her stories. Now Stacy put one hand in the center of John's back and pushed him down more firmly. "Just try to get up. Ha! Imagine, I, your little $30 per hour girlie masseuse, now can EASILY pin you with just one hand! You're HELPLESS! Are you even pushing against me? Is THIS the man who just hours ago threw off tackles from the toughest players in the NFL? If only they could see you now! So weak and defenseless. Completely ay MY mercy!" "Oh god, Stacy! Wait. Wait!!" John was pulling on her arm to let him turn, but Stacy, deep in her story, resisted and just held him down more firmly, leaving him still flat on the table. "You can't stop me. You can't do anything except what I want you to do and -- "Stacy, stop. I'm gonna come. I can't ... ohhhhh!" John's whole body shuddered and he spurted out a torrent of come. "Jeez Stacy! I TOLD you I was coming." That broke the spell. "Oh gosh, John, I didn't realize. I thought we were ...." The realization of what had just happened, of what she had just done hit her and she shut her mouth, unsure whether John realized. She mustn't say anything. "We, uh, can just take a shower together. By the time we're done -- "Yeah, Stacy. I just had the same idea," John interrupted, swinging to his feet and pulling her by the arm to the shower. She went right along, without a shred of resistance. John thought he could already feel the tinglings of his next erection. 19 June -- Year 3 He felt a bit strange being strapped to so many wires, but his frustration was so great he was willing to try anything -- within reason. Ms. Muselhi signaled him and he began the leg presses. No problem, although he still found the loss of strength from his long period of inactivity maddening. The sit-ups were also fine. Then she turned her attention to his upper body. He wanted to go right to curls, but she insisted on lat pulldowns first. Fine. He gripped the bar above his head, very conscious of his form, and started pulling. It was like someone fired a stun gun directly into his back and he let go, crying out in pain. He stood for a few moments. Ms. Muselhi was looking at the screens, writing notes furiously. Then she must have realized that he had screamed. She put down her pen and turned her head. "Oh, I am very sorry Mr. Rose! Are you all right?" "Yeah," he said, a bit annoyed at her lack of sympathy. These professional women. Put a white coat on them and they become .... "I was just ... it is very interesting. Are you able to try another exercise? Or is the pain too much?" He took a breath. "It seems to pass quickly. I can do it." "Good," she said. "I am sure this is very hard for you." He hated that falsely cheerful, condescending tone. Do they teach that at physio school or whatever they called it? Exercising wasn't tough at all. It was not being ABLE to exercise that was getting to him. He looked at his biceps. It would take months of hard work to get them back to the way they should be, and he'd have to listen to Gustaf's taunts the whole time. He'd say, in a voice loud enough for everyone in the gym to hear, "Hey, lighten those weights for John. He can't do that much anymore." Or he'd spot him, exaggerating his "concern" that John would drop the bar. It was enough to make him want to change gyms. THAT was the answer! And that would solve another problem for him, one that he didn't want to admit even to himself. It was Stacy. He couldn't believe how dedicated she was now to weight-training. Nor could he believe the results she was getting. Her body was practically bursting with muscle. She didn't like to show off for him -- maybe she was shy about them -- but he had felt them many times and he knew she liked to flex them too. But only when he wasn't looking. Even with all the work she was doing to build up her body she probably still didn't believe he truly found her muscles attractive. He would never understand the female mind! But then, her body mystified him too. Who would have guessed she could gain so much muscle! He loved the look, loved touching her in bed, feeling the hard curves on her arms, the cords of muscle on her neck and shoulders, the power of her abs as she clutched against him when she came. That was great. But she was in perfect shape now, her strength and endurance honed to perfection by almost two years of daily exercise. There was no way he'd be able to keep up with her at first, and he knew she'd want them to work out together. It was different when she had just started. Then he could have shown her what to do, and show off his strength at the same time. But not now. "Ahem. Uh, Mr. Rose? Are you ready?" Shit. That damn Muselhi. "Sorry. Just preparing myself. You know. For the pain." "That is what I am trying to help you with -- unless this is too much for you to do." John grit his teeth. Who was she kidding?! Or was this supposed to motivate him? Fuck her. He didn't need that kind of help from her. What he needed was for her to get rid of his pain. He could do all the rest. "Yeah. Let's go." He grabbed the bar again, very conscious of the sensors attached to this biceps and various points across his back and up and down his spine, the wires leading from him back to her and then plugged into her console. Her fingers were poised on the keyboard. For a brief moment he felt like he was a marionette, ready to be played by her. Or worse, like he was a character in one of those amazon-fiction stories and she was about to suck out his strength and transfer it to another character. Hah! Well, fuck that. He tensed his muscles and pulled. "AAAGGGHHH!!!!!" he cried out in agony. "See if you can hold it," she shouted. "A little longer." She typed at the keyboard. "Only another few ... ok. You may let go." Almost in tears, John released the bar and knelt on the floor. He had never felt such pain. What kind of sadist was she? He was twisted in a knot but slowly he felt the pain ebb. His breathing returned to normal. Fuck. If that was some kind of test, he knew he'd failed it. She was still twirling the dials when he felt able to get up. "So, any more torture for me today?" She looked at him blankly. "Torture? I do not understand. Oh! You mean the exercise? No. I have the data I need." John waited, but she went back to the console. "You can go home now," she said without looking up. "Excuse me, but aren't you going to tell me what you found out?" "I should first discuss this with your orthopedist. He must first look at the data and my opinion and then he will talk to your intern, or to you directly if you prefer." "Just a minute! I'm the one paying you! I'm the one going through hell here! I want to know what's going on!" She flushed red -- as red as her dark complexion allowed. "It is your insurance that is paying, Mr. Rose," she said coolly. "My INSURANCE! Listen you ...." John tried to calm himself. "You have to understand. I've been going through this for ten months. I HAVE to know what's going on!" She looked at him steadily, calming herself. "I do not take orders from my patients." She breathed evenly. "Well, if you are so interested in what I think, I will give you my opinion. I do not like the opinion of your doctor. It is my opinion -- just my opinion -- that you have a slight pinched nerve in your vertebrae. It apparently does not bother you normally -- at least not yet -- but it is aggravated by the stress you place on your upper body when you tense the muscles of your arms and shoulders. I do not believe there will be anything further I can do for you now, sir. Some doctors might recommend surgery. But I do not know about that." John took it in, trying to absorb the implications of what she was saying. "So you're saying this spondylolysis thing isn't right? You're saying it's a pinched nerve that only hurts when I work out? That's crazy! How can such a thing -- never mind. But you think that surgery can make a difference," he said, relieved that at least he had options. "No. I did not say that." Ms. Muselhi looked at him evenly, betraying no emotion. "I cannot speak for your doctor. I am only predicting what some doctors will say. It is my experience that doctors like to cut. To please you and increase their fees, they will tell you to get surgery. It will give you hope, but I think it will do no good at all. And there are risks. Serious risks." "What kind of risks?" "I see cases like yours many times. The doctors do their work in one day and get their very large fees, and then they send their patient to me. I work with them for months. Only rarely do they improve as their doctor promised. And who do they blame? Not the doctor!" "Ms. Muselhi! I asked you a question!" "Oh yes, about the risks?" She shrugged. "More pain. Even less muscular function. Possible paralysis. Possible loss of erection. I have seen many problems. But I am not a doctor. You must talk with your doctor. He will tell you what to do and as he is a 'doctor' you will do it." "I have three doctors! One says spondylolysis. One says muscle spasms. The third isn't a specialist and so he agrees with the first guy. And now you say something different completely! I don't understand! I just twisted my back! That's all! Why can't you help me? Why can't anyone help me?!!" "I do what I can. But there is fate too. It may be that you have a weakness. Sooner or later it would have asserted itself. You were in good condition and that helped to put it off. For a while. But now it has come out. If you continue to strengthen your back as I have instructed you will have many years of normal function. You can be grateful for that. You will still be able to maintain good muscle tone in other parts of your body, as you are now able to resume exercises for your back, your legs, your abdomen. If you want, I can recommend ...." John had stopped listening. He looked at his arms. She was saying he wouldn't be able to exercise his arms. He wouldn't be able to work his biceps back into shape. The biceps that had made him so proud. Soon they would become ordinary. And even worse! Ms. Muselhi followed his eyes and raised one eyebrow. "Ah yes, your biceps." Hearing the words snapped him back to attention. "I know you are a bodybuilder." John started to protest but she shook her head. "Never mind. Like most men you are very proud of your biceps. That is all very well, of course, but now it is changed. You have to be careful not to put too much strain on your shoulders. You will risk too much. Pain and maybe other damage as I have said. Of course in the end it is for you to decide. I will not write another letter to your gym. That would be irresponsible of me, but I cannot prevent you from purchasing your own equipment. That is up to you." She smiled. "I say to you only that you must be careful to preserve the abilities you still have. You are not a manual laborer. You can still practice your trade. For my brothers in Yemen this type of injury would be the end of their lives. And disaster for their wives and children, who would have to become beggars so that the family could eat. Even for me here. I need strength in my arms to work. As I understand your line of work, you need only to write and to speak. That you can do without pain and for this you should be thankful." "So, you're telling me that nothing can be done?" An image passed before John's eyes of his arms, shrunken and soft, barely able to tote his bag of presentation books from meeting to meeting, while pert, chirpy secretaries offer to "help" him with his things, effortlessly walking with a load that would stagger his ever weakening muscles, getting softer and smaller with each passing month. Ms. Muselhi shrugged. "You don't like what I say? Well then. Talk to your doctor. Maybe he will find someone else with a new idea. Or maybe you can try acupuncture. Or Chinese medicine. Or homeopathy." John stared at her angrily. "I'm sorry. I don't know magic. I work with bodies, but to be honest, some bodies just do not work. And so my patients must learn to do the best they can, and with this I try to help too. You go find another doctor. Perhaps he will tell you what you want to hear. But afterward, maybe, you will remember what I said. And now, you will excuse me. I must write my report." She smiled briefly and then began to work, leaving John to dress and make his way home. 20 Two weeks later, after a consultation with a third specialist, John was sitting with his internist again. "So, what did you think of Dr. Minsky?" "A little strange, to be honest, Gary." Dr. Milner nodded. "Yes. Many people think so. He is brilliant, you know, but he definitely does not have a good rapport with patients." "He wouldn't tell me anything. Just asked question after question. I thought I was being psychoanalyzed." Gary chuckled. "Well, you were. He has a dual qualification, you know. A bit strange in this day and age, and there isn't much demand for psychoanalysis anymore. We all would rather take pills. Or go for shorter term treatments. That's why Minsky developed a second specialty in treating cases like yours. But in my opinion he still would rather practise psychiatry." "Why did you send me to him then? There must be hundreds of good back specialists in New York." "I did because he's one of the best, and sometimes his unconventional views turn up something no one else would think of." "And is this one of those times?" "Hmmmm. Maybe. I don't know. He thinks you might have spondylolysis. Or you might not. But in his view it doesn't matter because he doesn't think that is the cause of your pain." John frowned. "OK. You've lost me." "Well .... He thinks the problem may be psychosomatic." The internist paused, letting the words sink in, knowing John would not be at all receptive. "He thinks I'm crazy?! Well fuck that! I'm not even going to pay the BILL for that kind of loony advice. If he thinks I'm -- "John. He didn't say you were crazy. Hear me out. It's actually very interesting. You told Dr. Minsky about your frustration, about your pain, about what you've tried to do, about the massage treatments your girlfriend gives you -- which I didn't know about, I may say. You also dropped a few remarks about her exercise program and how you feel about that. Now I don't want to pry about anything you don't want to tell me, but the answers you gave Minsky led him to conclude that you -- or a part of you at least -- actually don't want to exercise. That you want to become weaker and to let your girlfriend become stronger than you are." John was becoming redder and redder. He stood up and shouted, waving his arms around then grimaced and sat down. "Damn it, Gary! You're crazier than HE is. You've known me for six years! How can you say that! You know how I feel about being in shape! You think I WANT this?! You think I WANT my muscles to turn into blubber?!!" Gary watched him calmly. "To a psychiatrist, this behavior would be called 'resistance'." He paused a moment while John fumed. "I know that consciously this is just about the last thing in the world you would want. Psychiatrists believe that the mind is more complex than that, as you must know. Now, psychiatric treatment isn't for everyone and this is certainly not a problem you NEED to have treated. Even if there were no doubt at all about Minsky's diagnosis, no one is going to have you committed because you can't work out. And as I've said, this is just an interesting theory. Even Minsky would need to do a lot more work with you to satisfy himself that he is correct, let alone to satisfy you. But if he IS right, psychiatric treatment may be the only way to 'cure' you. That is," he said with a smile, "assuming you want to be cured." John almost exploded in anger. "You're going too FAR with this Gary. I'm warning you!" He stood up. Gary laughed and held up his hand. "I'm sorry John. Really. I thought you might find it interesting. We can talk about other medical options, of course. Surgery for example. There are risks to surgery, John, and I won't recommend it if I don't think it might help you. The problem is: nothing definitive shows up on the X-rays or on your MRI, so it would just be exploratory at first. Even after surgery we might not find out what's wrong. You have to consider the possibility at least that Minsky's right or that, even if he's wrong, we can't find the problem. It does happen in medicine, you know, especially with back pain." John shifted uneasily. "I see. And what if the operation goes wrong? What if it leaves me able to do even less than I can now?" "I think that's a possibility with any kind of surgery, but an unlikely one. As with any kind of surgery at first there'll be discomfort and soreness, sure. But that will pass quickly and we'll get you on a good physio program, perhaps with Ms. Muselhi if you like her. I'm not suggesting by any means that you give up. Hopefully we'll be able to find whatever's limiting your use of your muscles. Your insurance will cover everything -- I've already checked -- so don't worry about the cost." "Your fee too?" "Why, yes. So you needn't worry about that. I know the year's been a tough one for you, John. Good move to keep up your health insurance, though. You'd have a tough time getting a new policy now." "Yeah, yeah. Thanks for your concern. I'll think about it. By the way, what DID you think about the report from the physio?" The doctor chuckled. "Oh I don't know. She's very thorough with the equipment she used. More than she needed to be I'd say. She must have put you through hell. But she hasn't FOUND the problem. All she's done is document your reactions. Her inference MAY be correct, but it's just an inference." "Uh-huh. But do you think she's right? About the pinched nerve?" He shrugged. "It's a possibility like any other. The main thing is her work doesn't give us enough to go on to take corrective action. Which nerve? Where? And why? We'd have to do a lot more tests to get the answers to those questions and we'd most likely find it isn't a pinched nerve at all. John, if we do surgery I'll make sure you're in the best hands. And we won't torture you like Muselhi. But any kind of work on the spine has to be done carefully. We don't want any surprises, John. And neither do you." "No. I sure don't. Thanks." He stood up and the doctor stood too. John put out his hand and gripped his doctor's, managing not to cry out in pain. 21 June -- Year 4 "So when do you think you'll be back?" Stacy asked, helping him fold his clothes into his bag. "I'm going to really miss you. We haven't been apart even for one night since the wedding." John handed her another shirt and looked admiringly at the movement of the muscles in her thick forearm. "Probably just two days. I don't have my hopes too high, but I can't pass up the opportunity. Getting the MeGaCo account back would be a real help. With that one and a few others I could quit my job and go back to consulting free time." Stacy pushed the suitcase shut, knowing John would use the occasion to watch her triceps bulge. She took every opportunity to show off her muscles for him, surreptitiously, just by doing everyday things. He never seemed to tire of it, and she never took his interest for granted. She knew full well there were plenty of muscular women around in New York and even more on the internet. "That would be great, honey. And since we're married you don't need the job for health insurance anymore. My plan's pretty good." "Yeah. Well, I don't know what will come of this. It's not as though I'm coming in through the front door here." He watched Stacy carefully lower the suitcase to the ground. She didn't have to do that. His back was much better than it had been. Although those "wheelie" suitcases were heavy, and he loved the way her careful lifting made her biceps pop. So why should he stop her? His aggression transferred to another front. "You know, I really SHOULD have sued them for the way they stole my ideas last time. I couldn't BELIEVE that Harvard Business Review study actually gave THEM the credit for it. The ONLY thing I can be thankful for is they didn't start selling it in their fucking stores." Stacy listened patiently. It WAS unfair, but John's lawyer had given him only a 50-50 chance of winning. MeGaCo would have fought him every step of the way and John would have risked losing everything, both his time and his money. The publicity from the litigation would not have helped his relationships with his other clients either. "I'm a little surprised they even want to talk to me," John continued, less heatedly, "but maybe this is some kind of admission that at least some of them know they treated me badly. Maybe they just want to test my attitude toward them, privately, before they meet with me more officially at the head office. It wouldn't be a total surprise that they want the benefit of my latest work. The stuff they stole is pretty old now." He smiled. "And with my new contract there's no way they'll get away with what they did last time. This Lyn Martin already said they'd sign it. -- IF there was something they think is worth buying." "And she's one of the special assistants to the President there," Stacy added enthusiastically. "Although I don't really understand why, if she's so important, she has to write you on her Hotmail account, without even using a spell-check. I would be really embarrassed to send an email out like that. I guess a lot of executives rely on their secretaries for spelling. But still, can't their senior executives count on secretaries keeping their emails confidential?" "Not from their IT department. Of all people, you'd have to know the way the IT staff can spy on the rest of the company." "But we never, ever read emails. Unless HR tells us there's a problem with misuse of the corporate systems." "I'm just saying you COULD do it, that's all. Right?" Stacy nodded grudgingly. "That's what she's worried about. Someone finding out about her talking to me before they decide whether to settle up. Of course I am just guessing. She didn't actually say that much in her note. But I have to think ahead." "Well, your intuition is usually very good. You always said they'd come back to you. And now look." The buzzer rang. "That must be the airport van. I have to go. I'll call you after the meeting and let you know how it goes. You know I don't even get to Bentonville until late afternoon. The connections are terrible." "I know, honey. Thanks! You know I'll be at Jeannie's tonight, so call me on my cell phone, ok?" She put her arms around her husband and kissed him. Her husband! She was so happy. 22 Stacy lay across one side of Jeannie's purple velvet-covered sofa and sipped mint tea while she patted her stomach. "Mmmmm. That is so good. I can't believe how much I ate. I'm going to have to work out twice as hard tomorrow! I wish I had your metabolism!" Jeannie raised her eyebrows just slightly. "You seem to do just fine with yours, Stacy." "Well, I guess I burn a lot more calories now that I have so much more muscle than I used to. It really makes a difference." She looked down at her arm a bit shyly. "John likes it too." Jeannie stirred her tea, looked down at the swirling leaves and said, "I'm so glad." She looked up at Stacy and continued, mischievously, "And do you think being stronger than he is has changed your relationship very much? I mean, other than getting married?" Stacy almost spilled her tea as she quickly moved toward Jeannie on the other side of the sofa and put her hand on her arm. "Jeannie! I am NOT stronger than John! No way!" Jeannie placed her hand on top of Stacy's, holding it there. "Really? Looking at the two of you standing side-by-side at the wedding ceremony I had a distinctly different impression." She let go and while Stacy seemed frozen in shock Jeannie traced her finger gently up Stacy's arm, along the prominent bump of her biceps. "You told me John still hasn't gone back to his gym. And you certainly haven't gotten any smaller in the six months since then," she added, pressing her finger lightly onto that bump. She withdrew her hand and brushed her blond hair back. Stacy's jaw dropped. "No, no, no! He -- you mean THAT's what people think?!" she said, suddenly upset. "No one said anything, Stacy, if that's what's worrying you," Jeannie said reassuringly, leaning back again on the opposite cushion. "They all commented on your lovely dress, how you seemed to be floating in a cloud, and envying you for your trim waistline. And for John." "Are you sure?" Jeannie nodded. "Oh thank goodness! If he thought that other people thought -- "Yes, but what does HE think about it?" Jeannie asked. "He ... I don't know! We don't talk about it! But he MUST know, right?" "Know what?" Jeannie asked feigning innocence. "Oh come on, Stacy. Talk to me." "I guess I can tell you, of all people." Stacy looked up at the ceiling and then back at her friend. "Well ... I've thought I was stronger than he is for a long while. I mean," she lowered her voice, "my muscles ARE growing. A lot. Anybody can see that. And getting stronger too. And his," she closed her lips, as if she were deciding, "well, they're smaller. He doesn't exercise. He can't. So, I mean, it's just natural, what happens, isn't it?" Jeannie was watching her intently. "It's really funny sometimes. We don't talk about it. But he loves these stories I make up, and in the stories I just get stronger and stronger all the time. Like in real life, but more exaggerated. He loves hearing about it in the stories. He loves touching my muscles. He looks at them all the time. Which really makes me feel good. You know, proud, attractive." She laughed, "'Loved' too, I guess. But he'd NEVER say something like, 'Gee Stacy, your muscles are really big,' or "I just love your big, bulging biceps,' or 'Hey Stacy, I'm having a little trouble moving this sofa. Would you give me a hand?' I think he'd rather die," she concluded, laughing awkwardly. "So, what does he do? I mean, they ARE big, Stacy. It's kind of hard not to notice them. You don't get undressed with the lights out, do you? Or just wear baggy sweatshirts around him?" "Of course not! I just don't, you know, make a big deal about my being stronger." "But it must be so obvious." "I don't know. It's not like it comes up a lot. Not like if we lived on a farm or something and had to do real physical work. Mostly we just work on our computers or eat or watch TV or go out together. Or make love." "Doesn't he notice it then?" "I don't KNOW. He doesn't exactly TELL me what he's thinking while we're making love, or even after -- although I wish he would. And I've never done anything to make him admit I'm stronger. I mean, I don't pick him up and throw him onto the bed or hold him down. I'd never force him to have sex." "Well, good for you on that score. But otherwise it's like I said before, for John a women's strength is just another way for him to experience her as a sexual object. The two of you go all out to prevent your superior strength from affecting the power balance in your relationship. You're the stronger one, but the only way it comes out is his use of your muscles to feed his fetish and to help him live out his own fantasies. Otherwise it's as if nothing has changed." "No, no! You're wrong, Jeannie. There's a big change. We're married now. And we're happy. And I really don't need him to acknowledge that I'm stronger than he is. Like, when we were on our honeymoon, I watched him struggle with one of the carry-ons, putting it up on the luggage compartment. And when we were leaving the plane I was the one who took it down. And it was easy for me. Of course, it is easier to take it down than to get it up there. But still. Anyway, I didn't say anything and he didn't either. There's no reason to, is there?" Jeannie grinned mischievously. "Don't YOU start anything!" Stacy said, laughing. "I'm just teasing you, Stacy. Of course the most important thing is that you're happy." "And it's not just the marriage. It's my job too. I've had three promotions in the past year. I'm learning new things all the time and I really love my job now. Honestly, I think having these muscles has made me more confident and successful too." She paused for a moment. "And you know, with John's business in a little downturn, I even made more money than he did last year!" "Really? So maybe you will change the power balance. Money means more than muscle, after all. If you keep this up, he's going to have to be the one staying home and changing the diapers when you have kids!" "Jeannie!" "And YOU'RE the one who'll have to protect HIM when you're walking on a dark street!" She smiled at the thought and got a faraway look in her eyes. "You'd better cut it out!" Stacy jokingly made a fist and flexed her right arm, producing a very impressive 16" muscle. "Whoa! Look at that!" Jeannie said, laughing. "John must think he died and went to heaven!" "Yeah, I guess so," Stacy said, laughing and admiring it herself. "Hey, speaking of which, he should have called already. His flight landed hours ago. I can't believe he's still in a meeting. Unless it's gone really well!" She turned serious for a moment. "Or unless something's happened to him." Meanwhile she thought to herself, he couldn't possibly be with that MaeLynn woman. He wouldn't dare! Jeannie smiled reassuringly. "I'm sure he's fine, Stacy. You know how bad he always was at phoning you when he was away on business." "I know. Still, I wish he'd call." 23 A few hours earlier John wheeled his bag across the airport tarmac. If Little Rock had seemed small, the "Northwest Arkansas Regional Airport" at Bentonville was more like a toy. How could any self-respecting company be located here! What kind of people could live in a place like this, much less work here! Ugh! There were a few people lounging around the waiting room, a fat lady talking to her fatter husband and some grizzled men chewing the fat over what was no doubt indescribably awful coffee. John searched in vain for driver holding a sign with his name on it. Nothing. And this place wasn't even large enough to lose someone. He stepped outside into the heat and walked the 100' or so to the road passing the terminal and peered around, then walked up and down. A woman in an old car called out to him. "You John Rose?" He stopped and bent down to look into the car. "Lyn? Lyn Martin?" She shook her head, taking some time to look him over. "She sent me for yuh. A'm her drahver today," she said with a smile. "Get on in. A'll take yuh raht theah." John looked disapprovingly at the back seat, half of which was filled with junk. The passenger side in the front was no better. THIS was the car and driver they'd sent for him?! There was no WAY he was going let them treat him this way. More MeGaCo mind games, trying to diminish him from the start. Well, if it came to this, he'd turn down the job. His pride had taken enough of a beating the first time he worked for them. Still, he'd traveled this far. He might as well meet this Lyn Martin and see what she had to offer. That decided, he squeezed into the back and put his bag on top of the maps, shopping bags, baseball gloves on the seat, and pushed the (undoubtedly) broken microwave oven on the floor further away from him with his feet. "Don't mahnd that. Ah've been fixin to take it dahn to mah cousin Jake's but haven't been out his way for awhahl." John mumbled an ok in reply and closed the door. "Nope, not closed yet. Yuh have to slam it real hard." John did it a couple more times, finally putting everything into it. "There yuh go! OK. We're off!" She pulled away with a squeal of the tires that pushed John back into his seat. He took note that there were no seat belts anywhere in the car. They settled on a road away from the town. After the road quickly lost its newness and settled into a two lane highway, John asked, "Just how far are we going?" "Oh, aways. Miz Lyn lahks her space." "Oh, so we're going to her house?" "It's jus a place she's usin'. You'll see raht soon enough." John settled back impatiently, not enjoying the twists and turns through the hills. They turned off the road onto a smaller road then another and another and then finally onto a rutty dirt road, which didn't induce his driver to slow down one bit. "Sorry 'bout the road. S'not much further down." They finally stopped at the end of the road and she got out. "Come on. We've got to walk through the woods now." "The woods? Are you crazy?" John sat in the car, refusing to open the door, while the woman stood outside. "This is crazy," he repeated, rolling down the window. "Waal, this is how we live out here. It's a big place an' it's private. That's what we do when he can." She stood with her arms folded. "OK. Miz Lyn said I was to take you back if you wouldn't come. No skin off mah nose." She started to go back to the car. "No, wait. OK." John kicked the door open and took his bag. "How far?" "Far enough so yuh cain't hear the traffic." John looked down the dirt road. Traffic? She went into the woods and John followed, pulling his bag over the ground as best as he could, his shoes and pants quickly getting soiled from the mud. After nearly twenty minutes and several turns they came out into a clearing and John saw a modest farmhouse. "That's it. Lyn's waitin for yuh insahd." John grimaced, "Yeah, well thanks." He took out his wallet and handed her a five. "Hey thanks!" She took it and to John's surprise immediately turned around. So would Lyn take him back herself? Perhaps a good sign then. He walked up a clumpy path to the front door slowly, carrying the heavy case to avoid the soft mud, knocked, and when there was no answer he pushed it open slowly and went inside. Hello? Hello?" he called, feeling annoyed again. He walked further into the house. "This is really pathetic!" he muttered to himself as he looked at the faded paint of the walls, the chipped furniture, the ancient kitchen. Not even a computer around, or a television or stereo of any recent vintage. This couldn't be where the Assistant to -- "My sweet Rose!" John turned around. He didn't see her but he knew that voice. Mae-Lynn's voice. "Well I finally got you back. It took some doing, but you came." "So you're 'Lyn Martin'! Mae-Lynn, Lyn Martin. Sheesh!" "Yeah, that's me," Mae said, her head appearing in the hall from the front of the house. "Johnny Rose. After all this time." "Damn it!" John stamped his foot angrily. "I can't believe you got me to come all the way out to this place for nothing." "It's not for nothing. I've been wanting to see you for a long time." She looked at him more closely. "I thought you looked different when I saw you coming up the walk. You're smaller somehow, aren't you?" she asked, a small smile forming on her lips. "Yeah, maybe. I hurt my back a while back. It's better now, but I haven't really worked out much for more than a year -- almost two. Look, Mae-Lynn, it was a great week we had together, but that's long over. I'm married now and all I really want to is get back to New York, back to my work and back to my wife. Now are you going to take me back to the airport, or do I have to call a car?" Mae-Lynn laughed. "Right. I get it." He looked around. "I'll be damned if I can find a phone book here." She just watched him. "Or a phone." "That's right. No phone," she chirped happily. "Fine. So you're not going to help me, huh?" He glared at her and pulled out his cell phone. "Damn, there's no signal out here." "Uh uh. Not for miles around neither. So unless you paid real good attention to the turns and want to try to walk, you're stuck here 'til I decide to take you back," she said triumphantly. "Mae-Lynn! This isn't funny." "Not for you maybe, but definitely for me." "Well fuck it, Mae-Lynn, and fuck you! Then I'll fucking walk back if I have to." He grabbed the handle of the case and started striding down the hall with determination, rolling his case behind him. "I don't think you should try it, Johnny," Mae-Lynn said confidently. She stepped into the hallway in front of the door and stood with her hands on her hips. John looked up at her and stopped short, about six feet away. "Hmmm?" she said. "Notice something?" John stared at her in utter shock. Stacy's development over the past years had amazed him, but Mae-Lynn made Stacy look like a waif. Her chest was so wide and deep that it was though her shirt were packed with softballs. Her shoulders were the same, and her arms had so much muscle that had she been wearing sleeves John would have assumed she had padded them. She put her hands together and pressed lightly, making her biceps bunch a little. "I'll save the full muscle show for you later, Johnny, but if you want to feel how strong I am right now, you just keep coming and try to get through me," she said, grinning. She flexed her pecs several times, pushing her tight shirt out and in while she waited for John's reaction. His eyes couldn't help themselves. They traced the outlines of her arms, looping the curves of her still outsized breasts that sat atop her pecs, then traveled down to her legs, thickened and ridged with muscle, each of her thighs as wide as her muscled waist. "Well, I think I got the beginnings of your attention now." She walked slowly toward him and put her hand lightly on his chest, then pushed him into the wall with one arm and held him there with her forearm across his chest. "You use those 'wheelie' things now? Well no way you're gonna walk with it that easy!" She kicked his suitcase. "Hey, what do you think you're doing?" he said as her next powerful kick buckled the casing. The third split it, scattering his change of clothes and his papers onto the floor. He struggled to push her arm away using both his arms. "Oh, Johnny! You HAVE gotten weak! I'm hardly even trying! Let me show you." "Agggh! he cried out as she pushed harder into his chest, all of his efforts to push her away amounting to nothing. "I can't ... you're crush -- She let up. "Yeah! That was maybe half my strength. I'm really looking forward to showing off more of it later." She eased up on the pressure while leaving his arm on his chest and he coughed, leaning limply against the wall and tried to catch his breath. "Awww, poor little Johnny," she said with pretended concern. She reached down with her other hand and felt his crotch. "What's this? I know you like muscle. Did I scare you too much for you to get it up for me? Maybe you need THIS to get you going." She cocked her arm in front of his face and started flexing, the great ball of muscle rising steadily, higher and higher, looming larger and larger before him. "Yeah, Johnny. Just look at it grow. I can make it bigger still. All I have to do is flex. Have you ever seen biceps so big? Isn't it just like I've absorbed your strength, Johnny? Like those little games I used to play to get you hot? Look at it, Johnny. Look at that muscle. It's getting bigger and bigger, Johnny, all the time. I'm getting so strong. And you're so weak. You're getting weaker and weaker; your muscles are turning into mush. Ha-ha! Well what do you know! That's all it took. You've got it up already!" She started rubbing him through his pants while she flexed. "Stop that. Stop!" Mae-Lynn just laughed and pushed roughly against John's cock. "Beg me. I want to hear you beg!" She put her hand between his legs and lifted him in the air. "Yeah. We're going to have a lot of fun together. Me and you." "Mae-Lynn, you're making a big mistake here. Don't make me fight you." "Fight me? Oh, you go right ahead, Johnny. I want to see if you dare try. Yeah, hit me with all you got! Ha-ha-ha! All YOU got!" John looked down at her. She was supporting his weight with just one arm. Sure, he weighed less now than he used to, but still, to lift his 180 pounds or so with one arm meant she was far stronger than he was. Her muscles, which now HAD to be fully tensed, were huge and looked as solid as any he'd ever seen. "You don't dare, do you? 'Cause you're afraid of me. Afraid of my muscles. What's more, you probably LIKE the idea of being weaker than I am." "That's ridiculous!" Still, he hesitated. What was he going to do? Kick her? Wrestle her? Her legs looked like tree trunks. He'd never bring her down. On the other hand, he couldn't just let her dominate him like this. Not without putting up a fight. Besides, she may have muscle, but he'd been a wrestler in high school and he knew how to fight. She was using her right arm to hold him, so John quickly brought his left fist around to her temple. She couldn't cross her left arm over quickly enough to stop him and was shocked and staggered by the blow and John pushed himself off her arm, then, bracing himself against the wall, pushed her away from him with his legs. It was like moving a tank, but he got away. "Oh no you don't!" she cried out and started after him. John had taken just two steps when he felt her hand on his shoulder. Before he could twist to knock it off she pulled him backwards into her and folded her thick arm around his chest, trapping his arm inside. He swung the other behind him, catching her with a sharp elbow to her side. She grunted, but the solid feel of her body told him he couldn't have done much harm, if any, and then she caught hold of his arm before he could pull it back. "I've got you!" she said in triumph, and before he could stamp on her foot, his shoulder exploded in pain as she twisted his arm up behind his back. "Aaagh!" he cried. "Don't you hit me! I'll break it. I swear I'll break it if you try one more thing." The pain was excruciating. "OK. OK," he said, relaxing his arms to show he gave in. She shook him a couple of times. "Jesus, that hurt!" she said angrily. "Damn you!" She was still holding on to him, and now marched him down the hall away from the door. He was pleased that he had hurt her, but it hadn't done much except remind her that he could still threaten her. "I bet I end up with a black eye!" He thought, 'Well, what did she expect?' but in the current situation decided to hold his tongue on that. Instead he said as calmly as he could, "What are you doing, Mae-Lynn?" She laughed. "Why, can't you tell? I'm getting back at you, sweetie! For the way you made me feel!" She must be out of her mind. She was the one who stopped writing him! But again, no point in arguing about that. He didn't want to say anything to make her think he wanted to start things up with her now. He just wanted to get out of there. "Mae-Lynn, this is no way to deal with this," he said, trying to find her rational side. 'If she had one,' he realized. "Well, maybe that's true in New York, Johnny, but out here, this IS the way. We like to be personal, you know?" She spun him around to face her, still keeping a tight grip on his arm. "I don't like being neglected and disrespected. I fell hard for you Johnny. You made me feel different about myself, and then it all turned out to be a big lie. Just another line from a slick New Yorker." She felt the part of her face where he'd hit her. "Well, you ought to be sorry, so sorry for what you did. And maybe just maybe I can make you want me all over again. C'mon." She pulled him toward a door. "What are you doing?" John asked, suddenly even more worried. Mae-Lynn pushed the door open. It led to the cellar. "Go on," she said, catching his other arm. "No!" he said, digging in his heels. She pushed him back against the wall, pinning him solidly. "I WILL hurt you Johnny. And I can do it too. You saw what I did to your suitcase. You want to feel what I can do to your body? And I'm not gonna call a doctor for you, believe me, so it won't be too smart of you to take a chance on it." John squirmed, trying to get free. "Look how weak you are already. And I haven't even started on you yet. Now you get down there, or I'll throw you down." Once he started down those steps, would he ever get back? On the other hand, he'd already tried twice to fight her, and in his weakened state from two years without real exercise she was far too strong for him. If he hurt himself going down, he would be even more vulnerable. "All right. All right." He went down into the darkness and she followed close behind him. "Keep going. Keep going." He arrived at the bottom and she switched on a light. "Through that door." He saw a small room with a heavy metal door in front of him, like a fallout shelter, but with a reinforced glass window in it. That's what it was. Shit! She grabbed him from behind and pushed him forward into the room. "Yeah, get in there! Heh-heh." There were heavy handcuffs attached to the wall. He couldn't let her tie him up like that! He'd be completely at her mercy. He turned around and ran right at her, trying to bowl her over, but she was ready for him and tackled him, pinning him on the ground. He groaned at the impact and the weight of her body on his. "Ha! You think YOU can steamroller ME? You wish! I bet I outweigh you by 70 pounds, you weakling. And just you wait 'til I'm finished with you. I'm gonna give you your wish. Just you wait and see!" "What do mean by that?" "Never you mind!" She got up. "Now go and put your wrist into that cuff. DO it!! That's right. Ha-ha! Very good, Johnny. You're being so obedient. Now click it closed." John glared at her, his hand poised to comply. "I'm telling you now, this won't turn out well for you. You've gone WAY too far and when this is over I'm going to see to it that you who spend a lot of time behind bars." "Oh? So you think it'll ever be over?" John looked at her with hatred and removed his hand from the cuff. "Forget it, Mae-Lynn. That's enough." "Who's going to stop me?" she said cockily, moving closer. John looked around desperately for some kind of weapon. There was a wooden chair but nothing else. He crouched into a boxing stance, trying to keep back from her, maybe maneuver around so that he would be on the right side of the door. Then he could dash out, close the door on her and make a run. But she just waited patiently, almost immobile, blocking any escape. He thought he saw an opening and tried to fill it with a punch, but she moved and it glanced off her solid shoulder. She advanced on him and he realized that in that small space, he would never avoid her, so again he charged, trying to push through. He failed completely. She grabbed him by the waist and threw him down and then fell on top of him, pinning him quickly again, this time trapping both his arms under hers. "Ha! That's three for three! And now, goodnight, Johnny." She pushed hard into his chest, forcing the air out, then put her hand over his mouth and nose and pinched them shut. His helpless struggles did nothing, only exhausting his air more quickly, and he passed out soon afterwards. 24 When he came to he was seated on the chair, his right arm twisted behind him, his wrist cuffed and attached to a hook bolted to the wall. Several pulls confirmed he would never pry it loose. The handcuffs were so short he had to face away from the door in order to straighten his arm. He stood up and turned toward the wall to relieve his aching arm. His shoulder and chest ached and he noticed his hunger for the first time -- a bag of chips on the airplane were all he had eaten since he'd left his apartment after breakfast. He had no idea what time it was now, or even whether it was day or night. Was it just this morning that he had kissed Stacy good-bye? He realized his bowels ached. So what was he supposed to do? Soil himself? Then he noticed a bucket that Mae-Lynn had "thoughtfully" left for him. He stared at it and the roll of toilet paper inside, and decided that it beat the alternative. He undid his pants and squatted. Now this was complete degradation. At least he felt more relaxed afterwards. He pushed the bucket as far away as his could without being unable to reach it if he needed it again, turned the chair around and tried to get back to sleep. 25 "You look very comfortable there, Johnny." He snapped up and turned his head. The bucket was clean. A few stray bits of light came in through cracks near the ceiling. She stood in the doorway wearing shorts and a muscle t-shirt. She had a large weight in her right hand and she curled it slowly as she stood. "I bet you're hungry." He didn't want to admit it but he was. Very hungry. She went outside and tossed him a small bag of potato chips and a bag of six oreos. "Here's breakfast. And lunch." She went out and then rolled him a thermos. "All the water you can drink." She disappeared again. "And I'll even give you some vitamins. Don't want you to get sick." She threw a bottle of drug store brand multivitamins his way. "This is what you're feeding me?" "Uh huh," she said, switching arms. "Damn, this has gotten addictive. You know, I just have to be exercising just about all the time now. Otherwise I don't feel right. If you're interested, sometime I'll show you my whole routine. I bet you'll be impressed. Not like there's gonna be much other entertainment going for you." He noticed her hulking biceps bulge with each repetition then turned away. "Yeah, I noticed how you were all twisted up. I'll have to put up a mirror there. Or maybe if you're good I'll get you a longer chain so you don't have to face the wall like that." "Don't bother." "Ha-ha. Big tough man. I can wait. Easier on me than on you." She put the weight down. "I think I'll join you for lunch." He didn't respond. "Yeah, be that way." She walked up the stairs and then back down. "Mmmmmm." He turned around to see what she was eating. It was a large glass of something. "It's a Herbalife drink. My oldest sister sells their stuff. 'Muscle building protein drink.' It's the best tasting one, like chocolate milk. I have six of these every day." John made a face. "Oh it really works, you know. All this protein. Lots of vitamins too." "Spare me." "Why, that's my plan!" John stayed resolutely turned to the wall. "You don't have to eat that stuff but you're not getting anything else. I've got boxes and boxes of chips and oreos from Sam's Club. They'll last a long time." "Is this your idea of a joke? Feeding me crap food to make me sick?" "I could give you salads but it's too much work. I hate cooking or making food. That's why I'll give you the vitamins. I don't want you to get scurvy or anything, or for your hair to fall out. I don't want to make you ugly. Just ...." "Just what?" he said, challengingly, turning around to glare at her. She smiled. "Just weak. Weaker and weaker. I'm not giving you any protein. I'm not going to let you exercise. I figured out just about 800 calories a day or so. You won't need more 'cause you're not going to do anything. And meanwhile, I'm going double up my exercise. And my protein drinks. Plus the heavy work I do at the farm. See what happens after three months, six months, a year. Imagine what the two of us'll look like then. Huh?" "You're crazy! You think you'll get away with this? You think no one will find me long before then?" "No. I worked it out with my sisters. We were pretty careful. The plates on that car aren't registered to anyone we know -- it's been junk for years. My middle brother found it and used to work on it as a hobby but he doesn't need it now 'cause he got a better car. By now it's just on a roadside somewhere. And no one ever comes out here. Unless someone's looking for a still. And I don't got one." She smiled at her own cleverness. "I think there's lots of men who go missing because they want a change in their lives. That's what my Daddy did. We've never found him even though Momma has never stopped looking. It's not as suspicious as with women. Some loner kidnapping a girl for sex or for carving her up. That happens to women and young girls, not men in the prime of life. Like you." John shook his head. "It'll never work!" "You haven't been around Arkansas much have you Johnny? This State is filled with people who don't want to be found, and no one looks very hard for 'em either. I think the sheriff of Madison County has better things to do than look for some fool New Yorker who came out here to sell himself to MeGaCo. And I'm thinking that after enough time goes by and you get smaller and smaller you won't really want to be found anyway. You'll be too ashamed of being so puny!" Aha! So he was in Madison County, wherever the hell that was. "You've really lost it, Mae-Lynn. You're insane, do you know that?!" She walked closer to John but still outside his range of movement and brought her arm up for a slow flex. "Is that what you think? I'm your dream girl, Johnny, your wish come true. You'll see that. Or maybe I'm your worst nightmare. But just you wait long enough, when you're down to a hundred twenty pounds or so, and I'm up to 260, 270. My muscles'll be so big and so hard. You'll be wanting them so bad you'll be drooling over them. And we'll put your thin little arm next to mine. Yours'll be barely nine inches around and mine'll be twenty or more. We'll play games, have little contests, make up stories like we used to do on the internet. I'll be so strong by then and I'll feel even stronger to you 'cause you'll be so weak. And you'll like it. You'll love it. And you'll love me. Yes you will! And I ... I," her lip curled into a sneer, "I will have destroyed you!" John was getting excited and angry. "That's just some crazy fantasy of yours, Mae-Lynn! It's not real!" "Oh it is SO real. It's a real fantasy. And it's going to come true! I'm going to make it real! You'll see!" 26 Three days later "Jeannie, I don't know what I'm going to do! I've filed missing person reports everywhere. Even with the FBI. No one has seen him since he got off that plane in Bentonville. He hasn't used his credit card, rented a car, withdrawn money, used his internet account. Nothing!" Jeannie held Stacy in her arms and stroked her head. "Oh dear, dear, Stacy. Oh you poor dear. What did the police out there say?" Stacy was in tears. "They're hopeless! It's like there are just three of them in any county and none of have the resources to look for someone, especially if we don't even know he's there. The ones in Benton County, where MeGaCo is, were no better. The only thing they could tell me is that apparently he never had an appointment with anyone at MeGaCo." Jeannie gave her a very concerned look. "I'm sure they think he's just run off with someone. They're acting like I'm just a hysterical female who wasn't good enough to hold my man or something. But I know, I just know he's in trouble and he needs me. And they won't help! He could be hurt somewhere. Or kidnapped. Why won't they help?" "I don't know. What are you going to do? Did you tell them about, you know, that Mae-Lynn girl." Stacy nodded. "I didn't want to. It's so ... embarrassing. But they said to tell them everything that might matter. And sure enough once I mentioned her they right away just said if he'd come out there to be with her, then there's nothing they could do about it. He said, 'It may not be right, ma'am, but it's not illegal for a man to leave his wife.' I can just tell they're not going to do anything!" "Well, if the police won't ...." "I know! So I hired a detective out there but it's expensive. I'm going to fly out to meet him Saturday but he said he'd start working right away. He's the one who told me no one's seen him. So maybe he's doing something. But still, most of his work is divorces. What I need is a real private eye, like in the movies." "I know Stacy, but -- "I know, I know. Those are just movies. And I can't even afford this guy for more than a couple of weeks. And how do I know he's even doing anything? He could just be taking my money and working on something else." Jeannie nodded. "You don't think he's run away from me to be with her, do you?" "I'm sure he hasn't," Jeannie said. "You two were so happy." "We ARE happy," she sniffed. "We ARE happy!" And she burst into tears. 27 February -- Year 5 Every day was the same. John thought it had been over two hundred days now, maybe two hundred twenty five. He looked down at the bucket, that ridiculous bucket. What he would give to use a toilet again! Still, one thing he had to say for Mae-Lynn was she always kept it clean. He had to give her credit for that. And ever since she'd put given him the bell he could call her easily when he'd used it. That way they didn't have to live with the smell. It would be better of course if he could use the toilet. Maybe soon he would be able to persuade her to let him. At least once a day. That would take care of the smell once and for all. She had said she would let him eventually but he supposed it wasn't time yet. He just had to be patient. He could hear her upstairs, her heavy tread moving through the house as she did her morning tasks before going out to the farm to work. He had his food already. She'd left the biscuits, raw vegetables and baked potato cooked the way he liked. Not much protein of course. That was her rule, and he had to accept it. He didn't like it but at least she heard him out and explained her position. It had surprised him at first that she had even listened to him, but they talked a lot these days, more and more. And he had convinced her that the junk food was ruining his teeth and skin. She did listen to reason, after all, and he had felt much better since. Letting him wash regularly and brush his teeth were other small steps forward, hard as it was to do those things when he was still handcuffed to the wall. Would she have time this morning to come down and say good-bye? He wondered what she was wearing. There wasn't more variety to his day than seeing what she wore and how she looked and what she said. When she was dressed for work she was well-covered, probably because it winter, so it was mostly her face he focused on and her thick blond hair, usually tied back. Most days he didn't wake up early enough to see her. She would be in and out of his room while he still slept. Funny how he needed more sleep than she did, even though he didn't do anything all day. But that probably was because of his minimal diet. That and the boredom. He wondered what was going on outside. Were we at war again? How were the Knicks doing? Had the Yankees gotten back to the World Series? What was happening in the stock market? What was Stacy doing? Did she think of him? Was she still looking for him? Months ago Mae-Lynn had told him about a detective who had found her sister and asked her some questions, but he'd never come out here. John knew all the sounds around the house now, and he would have recognized anything unfamiliar. "Bye, Johnny. See you later!" she said from the door of the house. He called back his good-bye and heard the door close. Now he had just her return to look forward to. He shifted slightly in his chair. His Lazy-Boy. An apt name. That's what he was now. Nothing to do. Cut off from the world. He pushed the chair upright and stood up and stretched. Still bound by the handcuffs, which thanks to his weight loss were now very loose around his wrists, he couldn't move very far, but at least now he had a chair that went almost all the way back and was comfortable for sitting and sleeping. And the chain on the cuffs was long enough for him to take a step or two in each direction, so his legs didn't cramp as much. But sitting in the chair was the most comfortable place for him. She'd be back sometime in the afternoon. Her work days were shorter in the winter. A little bit less to do, a lot less light to do it in, she'd say. He would hear her coming about five seconds before she opened the door, once she started walking through the brush. She would call out a hello, her voice more tired than when she left, and he would call back. Then she would walk down the hall to her room where she would take off her work clothes and then go to the bathroom to wash up. He would hear her sigh a few times before she turned the water on, before it drowned out most of her sounds. Except for some of her singing. She didn't have a great voice and she would sign the same country songs over and over, but within a certain range the notes sounded very pretty and he found himself looking forward to those bits every day. They seemed to penetrate right to his heart and made it beat more quickly. And it meant that she would be downstairs before too long, this time looking very different. That was the very best part of the day, when she would be wearing just a bra and panties and stand right outside the doorway, working out with her weights, showing off her muscles. God, she had muscles! They were so thick, so big. And then, while he finished the last of his food, she would drink down two or three glasses of her Herbalife muscle building drink, talking to him all the time about how strong she was getting, how she was building up her muscles just for him. And then when she was finished working out, finished with her drink, when her body was shining once again with perspiration, her muscles fully pumped, her face red with exertion, flush with health, she'd come close to him and let him touch her as much as he wanted. He got an erection just thinking about it. She wouldn't touch him or let him touch her with his dick, but otherwise she would let him do whatever he wanted, for as long as he wanted. He knew it was just to torment him, but he didn't care. He hated her. Her and her damn muscles. But more and more that was all he thought about. And dreamed about. He would want to touch her the rest of the day and all night too. But he'd get tired and eventually, when he couldn't hold his arms up any more he would tell her she could go. She would push him back into his chair and hold him down, tell him how weak he was, how pathetic and useless and then she'd leave his room, gather up her weights and go back upstairs. And then he would jerk off and invariably he was asleep in fifteen minutes. He never managed to stay awake until she went to bed. But in the morning his bucket would be clean, he would have fresh food and the cycle would begin again. He thought about jerking off now. He could do that and then take a nap. No. It was so pathetic. He knew he'd get back to that some time in the day, perhaps twice. But he would rather wait and give himself something to look forward to. Instead he stood up and stretched, gently twisting his body from one side to the other and bending gently to touch his toes, keeping his bound wrist and the chain clear of the rest of his body and moving slowly so that the cuff did not chafe his skin. He couldn't really do any exercise. For one thing, he had too little space and too little area for movement. For another, with the minimal food she gave him he tired so easily that it seemed pointless. After five minutes or so, he'd had enough and sat down again. He ate a little of his food, focusing on the potato while it was still freshly cooked. When he finished it, he pulled out one of the mysteries she had left for him. He'd already read it seven times. It was just boring enough to put him to sleep. He wasn't sure how long he'd slept. The house was still quiet. Perhaps it was midday. He stretched again and stood up. He guessed it was still morning, late morning, but he never knew. He ate a few vegetables, trying to make the food last. They weren't fresh, but they still had some taste. It didn't take much to break the monotony. He felt his stomach. He couldn't believe how thin he was. He remembered some studies he'd read about how starvation diets actually could extend the human lifespan. Well, at this rate he would live until he was 200. But what kind of life would it be? He looked at his thin arm. It made him want to cry. During his first few month's on Mae-Lynn's diet, the muscles in his arm had steadily shrunk, no matter how much he tried to exercise. He guessed that since he wasn't getting enough calories or any protein at all, increasing his energy consumption only made things worse. So he stopped the real exercise and did slow stretches instead and slept all he could. That seemed to slow down the muscle loss slightly, but it didn't stop them from getting soft, and now they were small AND soft. Oh, it looked horrible! He hated his arms. He hated his whole body. He hated Mae-Lynn. He hated himself too, for being stupid enough to be caught like this. All at time when things were going so well. Except he wasn't completely sure of all of his hate. Could he really blame himself for going out to Arkansas to pursue business? For getting into that car with who he now assumed was Mae-Lynn's sister. But she could have worked for MeGaCo. It could have been real. Or could it? Did he really think MeGaCo would come after him, after all those years, in such a way. Had he known all the time this was somehow connected to Mae-Lynn. Or had he HOPED it was? Maybe that's why he came, despite the obvious signs. The poorly drafted letter, the "unofficial" channels of communication. Didn't he know? And did he really hate Mae-Lynn? Sure, he wanted to. Sure, she was destroying his body, bit by bit. Sure, she was keeping him prisoner. But why then did she excite him so much? Why did he look forward to seeing her every day? To hearing her voice? She always said that she was doing it all for him. That everything she did was for him. He scoffed at that in the beginning, and they both said cruel things to each other. But now he wasn't completely sure. He should hate her, he knew. When he did escape, and he was sure he would, someday, it would be even more humiliating if it ever came out that he had feelings for her, even then, if people said that he, John Rose, had succumbed to the Stockholm Syndrome and fallen in love with his captor, like that silly Patty Hearst. So he couldn't admit that he didn't hate her. And yet, with every day that went by, he was thinking less and less about Stacy, and more about Mae-Lynn. Once he heard a noise outside -- it must have been an animal -- and a wave of fear ran through him. He didn't WANT to be found. He didn't WANT to go back. But nothing happened. And his own feelings embarrassed and shamed him. But when he thought about it, were things really going that well when he was in his apartment, with Stacy? Wasn't his career going down the drain anyway, forcing to take a job that paid less than she was making? He hated working for other people, spending his days taking orders, sucking up to bosses. It felt like slavery to him. And wasn't his body wasting away even when he was with Stacy, eating well, simply from lack of exercise? Was this just a matter of degree? Sure it was an extreme situation. It was a lot of degrees. Stacy loved him, was sweet to him, did anything to make him happy. That was sure. And Mae-Lynn did everything she could to weaken him, to make him feel small. How could he compare them? Could it be that, on some level, Mae-Lynn was the one giving him what he wanted, not Stacy? John stamped his foot in anger. That was absurd. Stacy loved him. Mae-Lynn wanted to destroy him! How could he even left such stupid ideas get into his head! He glared at the floor. And when was she coming back? 28 July -- Year 5 She had been hinting to him for two weeks now that today would be a special day. Now, from the faint, distant sounds he heard from outside he guessed it was the Fourth of July. That would be about right. He had lost count, exact count, but he was sure it was at least a year since she had captured him. Independence Day. So, would it be Independence Day for him too? Yesterday she had given him last Sunday's Bentonville newspaper to read. This morning she had put a touch of grated cheese on his potato. And now, after she had come home from work and showered, instead of coming down to work out, she had come downstairs still in her towel, released him from the handcuffs and told him to get dressed and wait here for her. Then she left, saying she would be down in awhile. For the twentieth time he looked at the bundle of clothes she had left for him. His original clothes had decayed into smelly rags after the first month, and since then she had given him a few sets of simple clothes to wear, which he changed from time to time. Of course during the summer it was too hot to wear more than a pair of boxers anyway. And now, this bundle? Was this just another humiliation? Well, in a way it was. But he also knew that it had given him the hardest erection he'd ever had in his life. The suit looked so small. He could hardly believe it would fit. But then, it was very elastic and he had gotten so small too. His biceps were nearly the same size as his wrist. His thigh was smaller than his knee. But there was nothing wrong with his dick. At least that worked. That was one part of him that hadn't lacked stimulation or exercise. He pulled on the shirt. No problem at all. Amazingly, it even hung on him slightly. At least it covered his arms so he didn't have to look at his muscles. Then the pants. Fortunately the waist was even more elastic than the rest. That kept it up. He laughed at how his erect dick forced the front out. He'd never seen the suit worn quite this way before. Then the last piece of it, which attached to the collar in back. He heard her at the top of the stairs. "Are you ready, my little darling? Are you all dressed?" "Yes!" he answered excitedly. She came downstairs slowly, deliberately, and stopped when she reached the bottom of the stairs. She stared at a piece of paper, closed her eyes and then put it on the stairway. He stood in his room, still next to his chair, staring at her in wonder. Her blond hair, set in a little girl's pigtails, shone. She wore a little white shirt and a green plaid skirt, with white stockings that stretched over her massive calves and black and white schoolgirl shoes, neatly tied. He trembled, his knees weak. She looked down for fifteen seconds more and took a deep breath, then walked into the room. "Well look at that! You finally managed to get free of your kryptonite chains!" "Yes!" he said, trying to sound confident. She grinned nastily. "It took you long enough. Well, you may be free now. But it won't change anything. I still won't let you escape. Not ever!" "You can't stop me. Perhaps you've forgotten. I'm Superman!" he said taking several steps toward the door. It was the farthest he'd moved since she had locked him up and, subconsciously, he still felt the chain on him. He put his hands on his hips, very conscious of the bones right beneath his skin. "And I suppose you think I'm just a little girl, at the mercy of your amazing superpowers? You ought to look again Superman!" John couldn't have stopped looking at her anyway, but now Mae-Lynn turned slightly, showing off her powerfully built chest, which combined with her naturally bountiful feminine endowments created large gaps between each button of her shirt, which must have been specially reinforced not to pop, and shaped her torso into a threatening triangle. John was painfully aware of his own thin, bony chest but his attention was overwhelmed by the vision of power before him. She raised one hand and slowly flexed the biceps of her right arm, the growing ball of muscle gradually tightening the fragile sleeve of thin cotton until it tore. Mae-Lynn casually ripped the remaining end piece of the sleeve off her arm, leaving the torn cloth to flap helplessly around her Herculean muscle. She stepped toward him fearlessly, challenging him to stop her, until his hands rested on her upper arms. "Isn't it obvious, Superman? While I've held you captive I've been taking away your superpowers, absorbing your strength and your muscle. You're just a shadow of the man you used to be, while I get stronger every day. Just feel my muscles. They're like steel." John was so excited that his hands shook as he grasped Mae-Lynn's biceps more tightly. To his weakened fingers they DID feel as hard and dense as steel. "You see? Why don't you try to use your so-called super strength against me? Go on, hit me with all your -- heh heh -- might!" John couldn't believe she was actually suggesting this, a scene from all his favorite amazon fantasy stories, but he didn't wait to be asked twice. He reached back and hit Mae-Lynn in the stomach as hard as he could. She just laughed. "You're TICKLING me, Superman! You know that? You are SO weak." He hit her again, desperately trying to push his fist through the wall of her abdominal muscle. "Afraid to use your full strength against me? Still pulling your punches? Ha-ha! Go on," she continued, laughing harder. "You've got NO strength left, Superman! Look at your puny arms. Just LOOK at them!" She grabbed his wrist and pulled his arm alongside hers. Although her wrist was smaller than his, her forearm swelled to at least twice his size and it looked as though three upper arms of his could fit inside hers -- until she flexed her biceps. The soaring bulge of her muscle dwarfed his, like a Shearman Tank beside a bicycle. She pushed him back onto his chair with a flick of her wrists. "Maybe you need to eat better, Superman!" she mocked. "Wait here. I have just the thing for you." She left the room and returned with a jar filled with a thick, dark green substance and handed it to him. "Here you go. It's a special concentrate of spinach, wheat germ, egg and Herbalife Muscle Building Formula 10+, jam-packed with vitamins, energy and protein. It's a new product, a free trial for loyal customers -- like me. It's supposed to be really powerful. Maybe you should have some. Maybe that will help restore your strength and make you a ... worthier opponent." John took it eagerly, his first real protein in a year! He twisted the top. It was stuck! He turned harder, using his sleeve to help him to tighten his grip. But to no avail! "Awww! You can't even open it? What a darn shame, Superman! There's your power drink, right there, and you're not even strong enough to open it," she taunted as John gripped it with all his strength, frustration mounting, his arms shaking, his face turning red from the effort. Mae-Lynn watched, then snatched it from his hands and turned the top using just her thumb and forefinger. "See? Easily as pie!" she exclaimed. He reached toward her to take it back but she caught his hand in hers and twisted him around while she put the jar to her own lips and drank it down, not even pausing for a breath until she had emptied it, while John futilely tried to escape from her hold, moaning repeated, anguished "no's" as he heard Mae-Lynn loudly gulp down the muscle-building liquid. "Mmmmm. Real tasty too!" she gloated. She released him and let out a satisfied burp. The torment was unbearable for John, so deliciously unbearable. She was already so strong, and now she had dangled this power potion in front of him before taking for herself! He felt as though he were living inside a story, and yet it felt so real. No, it WAS real. He WAS starved of protein, of real nutrients. He desperately needed it to start restoring himself and she had yet again denied it to him after letting him hold it in his own hands. And his own weakness had kept it from him. It made him almost faint with desire. His head was spinning. "Ooooh yes, I can feel it working! Makes me sooo warm!" she said, twisting her hips sensuously. She rubbed her stomach slowly and brought her left fist up and flexed her biceps and this time, as if her biceps truly had gotten larger, the sleeve immediately and audibly burst! John stared at the mass of muscle, eyes open in wonder. He could almost believe that the drink had made her already massive biceps grow even more. Maybe it WAS true! He couldn't help himself. He was crazy with desire for her. He clutched at her arm and pressed his lips to her biceps, covering them with fevered kisses, feeling their warmth, their solidity, his mouth moving around every millimeter of smooth skin to experience their size and depth. Was this heaven? As he kissed her she lifted him and pulled down his blue tights, freeing his quivering member to spring upward, a long line of pre-cum running from the tip to the waistband of the tights. She lifted him in her arms in a cradle hold. "This IS OUR 'Independence Day', honey. And now there's just one more thing for me to do to take away your power to resist me once and for all and make you mine forever," she said softly. "Yes, Superman, because now I'm going to take the remainder of your powers as Superman -- no, even more than that, your powers as a man -- away from you -- your strength, your muscle, even your power to grow stronger by exercising. You'll see. All except for your power to please me, and to be pleased by me. Forever. And I know you will thank me for it. You will THANK me!!" She bent her head to his crotch took him inside her mouth while he shivered in pleasure. Oh god she was good! John couldn't hold back, couldn't resist her for a second. His whole body shuddered and he exploded inside her and clutched at her powerful arms, feeling that his strength now resided in her, that in her was now the essence of himself, otherwise lost to him forever. He held her as tightly as he could, with all his remaining strength. 'Mine now, all mine,' she said to herself, enjoying the featherlight embrace of his passion. 29 September -- Year 5 "I don't GET it!" he said again in frustration, his arm straining on the third repetition, his tiny muscle almost invisible on his upper arm, with just a thin cord along the inside of his elbow rising to evidence his effort. Mae-Lynn looked over in amusement at John's attempt to one-arm curl the 3 lb. weight while she continued working with her 100 pounds. "I don't know why you bother doing that, Johnny. I showed you the article. Just 'cause you tore it up doesn't mean it's wrong." "Well, just because the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette said it doesn't mean it's right!" he said, giving up with his right arm and trying the left. With THAT arm he could barely even do one. He threw the weight in disgust, annoyed that it went just a couple of yards before hitting the ground loudly. "What you lost ain't gonna come back, Johnny. Your body kind of ate up your muscle and it won't be growing back, no matter what you eat now. It's simple as that. That's what the paper said, and you surely haven't proved it wrong." The idea that a news article from a country paper could actually have been the seed for Mae-Lynn's plan was galling enough. That it had worked was even worse. And that it had worked so perfectly was, he thought, as he stared at the rhythmic bulging of her biceps as she powered through her workout, simply fantastic. Despite, or perhaps even because of, his frustration, he lived in a state of constant arousal. Looking at her massive muscles whenever she was around him, dreaming about them when she wasn't. Her biceps were nearly 21 inches now, two inches larger than his had ever been, and they continued to grow bigger and bigger. She wasn't cut like a bodybuilder but there was still only a small layer of fat on her body, just enough to make it feel feminine. The muscle beneath was hard as steel. And it wasn't just the way she looked that excited him. It was her massive strength too. When she had released him from the handcuffs on "Independence Day," she had hoisted his "Lazy Boy" chair onto her back and just carried it upstairs as though it weighed little more than a backpack. When she cut wood for burning in the winter, she split thick logs with a single stroke of the ax. She walked the three miles home from her job carrying fifty pounds of tools for evening work around the house. And when she put on the Superman suit she had made him wear that day, before she had "stripped" him of his "powers" "for good," the elastic material moulded around her muscular frame like a second skin, stretching and folding to accommodate the changing feast of bulges and flexes whenever she moved. The sight of her bending steel bars while dressed in her costume, while taunting him to watch her enjoy "his" superpowers made him shake with desire for her. Then there was the amazing contrast in their strength. His weakness should have shamed him, made him retreat into himself with horror. After all, to any outsider, he might look like a victim of torture. Maybe his ribs no longer showed. His arms and hips had gained back enough flesh to cover his bones, and his knees no longer looked like an anatomy lesson. He could eat anything he wanted now, that is, anything they could afford on her modest wages at the farm. But while he felt healthy enough and no longer slept 18 hours a day, he was still pitifully weak. His arms shook when he lifted a half gallon of milk, and he couldn't pour from a full gallon jug without spilling it. Jars and bottles with screw caps were obstacles as impenetrable to him as his handcuffs had been. He could make their bed but couldn't lift the mattress to push the blanket underneath. He could vacuum the floor but couldn't pry open the canister to change the bag. He couldn't turn the sticky hot water faucet in the bathroom, couldn't push the front door open when it swelled in the rain, couldn't lift two of the three windows in the little house to get fresh air and couldn't even push the "Lazy Boy" down to a reclining position if Mae-Lynn had lifted the back. And even if he could get out the front door, even if he had known the path away from the house, down the track to the dirt road, there's no way he could walk that far. His legs felt tired from carrying even his modest weight after two or three laps around the house. If he had been at all rational, he would have hated Mae-Lynn with all his heart. He should hate her, he knew, for destroying his body, taking away his life, and imprisoning him in this backwards godforsaken place. But then he saw her body, saw it next to his, felt her massive chest, the solid weight of her arm, and his hate crumbled into something else. He didn't understand it, didn't understand his own feelings. Was it desire? No, because he felt it even when he wasn't aroused. Was it a fantasy, an escape from reality? But it WAS reality. Her strength, his weakness were what he lived with every day. Those were the facts. But his feelings were facts too. Bizarrely, his weakness, which by itself he did hate, became something different when pit against her strength. The frustration he felt when he pushed helplessly against the door transformed into something completely different when the door sprung open when she placed three fingers on it and bent her wrist; when he was on the bed, struggling to lift off one of her arms wrapped around him so that he could get up, being completely incapable of even moving her, while she made no noticeable effort at all to keep him there; when he used all his strength to try to lift one of her curling weights, only to see her lift both him AND the weight above her hand with one hand; and most of all when he covered one of her massive biceps with both his hands, pushing it as hard as he could, only to have her flex it and make her iron-hard muscle force his hands outwards. He loved to see his pale, thin arm rest against hers, clad in the tight sleeve of the Superman top, her wonderful biceps far thicker than any comic book drawing of Superman. He could stare at their arms side-by-side forever .... Could it be love? SHE spoke of love all the time now. But not the way Stacy did, never with a loving smile. Always with the hint of a sneer, flaunting her superiority, his helplessness, his dependency. So WAS it love? Was she SO adept at sensing his needs that she was only acting the part to tease his fancy? Or maybe it wasn't an act. Maybe that was just the way she was ... and somehow it entranced him. Enchanted him. Was that love? "What ARE you thinking about, my little sweetie? Are you thinking about me? Oh! I bet I know what YOU want," she said, putting her weights down in the corner of the room. She went out and quickly returned, smiling, in a new top, the special blue and red one. She stood in front of him, proudly flexing her biceps. "Look at these muscles!! You can't STAND it, can you? It must totally KILL you. It wasn't enough that I stole your powers, stole your strength, stole your muscle and stole your uniform. But I've stolen your HEART too! You LOVE the women who DESTROYED you. And you can't help it!" she said, reveling in her boundless power over him. How did she know?!! He never told her he loved her. He never would! "No! It's not true. It can't be true!" John cried out hotly, unable to take his eyes off her. Her chest was thrust out, her arms crossed in front of the "S" stretched across her breasts. "Oh, but it IS true!" she said with a triumphant smile. "And I will never give them back. Not your powers, not your freedom, and not your heart. They're mine to play with. Mine to enjoy. And I will become stronger and stronger all the time, day by day, while you will always be weak and helpless, my prisoner, my toy to play with, to enjoy however I want! And you know I DO enjoy your LOVE very, very much!" She flexed her biceps again and John watched with admiration and lust as her hard, thick muscle pushed the elastic material upwards. Unable to resist he reached toward her and held her biceps with both hands, treasuring the shape, the warmth, the hardness and the strength within. It was all so beautiful. It was what he'd always wanted. What more did he need? What more did he have to strive for, when he could now play out his fantasy any time he wished. Could money buy him this? Could love? Stacy was good, but it was completely different with Mae-Lynn. Now his life and her life too were dedicated to his fantasy, shaped by it. Even their bodies had taken on the shapes of his fantasy. He could never go back to his old life now, even if Mae-Lynn would let him. He couldn't live in the 'real world' -- meaning his old life -- with his body and strength so diminished like this. But he could live here, with Mae-Lynn, his Supergirl, forever. He held her with all his meager strength and she held him with a fraction of hers, their bodies joined first in a kiss and then, as ever, as she crushed him to her breast, in much, much more. THE END