TATJANNA CRUELA BEATS A LANDLORD AND DESTROYS A DIRTY PUB
by Hamlet



Tatjanna Cruela had just been to the filthy pub The Dirty Goose in Nottingham
the previous day and had dealt severely with the landlord and two drunken
customers who were wasting their time playing pool. She had told the landlord
she would be back again to make sure the place was spotless, which would be
highly unlikely

When she returned that day it was not up to her high standards and there were
few things, she detested more than filth! Although some of the tables had been
cleaned and the glasses removed, the floor was still covered in dust and there
was still dust everywhere.

She was on her way back from the gym again and was dressed in a leather
jacket, skin-tight leotard, and calf length boots and was wearing tight
leather gloves-altogether a formidable sight. There were three customers and
she ordered all of them to get out-one of them looked drunk, so she told him
he was barred for life and he was lucky to escape a beating.

She then went straight to the landlord and grabbed him hard round the neck
digging her nails hard into his throat. The pain was excruciating, and he was
crying in agony.

'Right you bastard I thought I told you to clean this filthy place up!'

''I'VE TRIED MADAME TITANIC 6BS III I SSSPENT ALL NIGHT CLEANING IT UP 'he
stammered almost unable to speak as he was in so much pain.

'Well you didn't do a very good job did you you bastard!'she said digging her
nails now so hard into his neck that blood was now starting to flow.

'There are teo things in the world I absolutely loathe -disobedience and dirt.
When I give orders to someone I expect to be obeyed. I do not give orders or
fun I give them so that the person does exactly as they are told!'

'As for dirt as a Norse Woman I loathe it. This place is disgusting and in my
view places like this should not exist'

'Now do you know what I'm going to do you f---g piece of shit?'

'NNOO PPLEASE SHOW ME MERCY MADAME TATANNA. I CAN'T STAND ANY MORE PAIN 'he
cried out with blood coming down his throat.

'Well you're getting even more pain and I will enjoy every moment of it. I am
going to give you a hard Belly Punching and you will end up a hospital case
you bastard!;

'NNNOOOO MADAME 6BS!' he screamed.

'And do you what I'm going to do to your filthy pub? I am going to destroy it
completely. After today this pub will no longer be trading because I am going
to smash absolutely everything in it. By the time I have finished there will
not be a single glass, table, chair, or bottle that I have not broken. So, you
will be spending the next few months in hospital and you will be out of
business completely. Do you f---g well understand you shithead?'

'; PPPLEASE MADAME 6BS DON'T DO THIS TO ME! I'LL PAY YOU ANYTHING YOU WANT!
MADAME 6BS' he screamed terrified of the prospect that awaited him.

'I don't want your filthy money. Now get your shirt off and stand to attention
with your hands on your head! You are getting two hard Belly Punches!'

She let his throat go-he had already lost a considerable amount of blood. She
quickly ripped off his dirty shirt as she knew how desperate she was to give
him a good Punching.

Being an expert on anatomy as a trained physiotherapist she knew exactly where
to punch to achieve maximum pain. She aimed her fist at his solar plexus and took
her time as she moved her hand slow up his stomach. God she was going to enjoy
this!

She didn't think two punches were enough but then more than two might kill
him!

She then moved her fist right back and clenched her fists to achieve maximum
impact.

She suddenly she struck driving her fist and all her huge weight right into
the solar plexus.

CRAAACCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

AAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

He let out an ear splitting sream and went flying across the room. He was
doubled up in agony and began to vomit all over the floor. What a disgusting
sight!

She pulled I'm up by his hair. He was literally blubbing like a little child.

'Right you bastard. Here comes the second one!'

She decided to break some of his bones, so she took aim at his ribcage. She
knew exactly where to hit him to achieve maximum pain. Again, she took her
time and moved her hand up and down his stomach-he didn't know when she was
going to

strike.

She then moved her fist right back and with full force drove it hard right
into his ribs She could feel the ribs cracking under her fist and could hear
the crackling of broken bone.

CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKK

AAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!-

The noise could easily be heard across the street as he flew right across the
room. He was totally unconscious as his head hit open against one of the
tables.

She stood over him in total triumph!

She then proceeded to smash the pub up and destroy everything in it.

She first of all picked up a table and hurled it through the window smashing
all the glass. She then did this with all the tables until all the glass in
the windows was broken to pieces.

She went behind the bar and literally broke every single glass against the
wall. She then took every bottle and smashed every single one.

She was getting excited doing this and was getting wet all over. The more she
destroyed the more she wanted to destroy. She was determined that nothing in
this pub would be left standing.

By the time she had finished the floor of the pub was like a river covered in
litres of drink and broken glass. The landlord lay in a heap on the floor
submerged in drink and broken glass. She had literally totally wrecked the
place!

She took a picture of the pub and the landlord lying there.

She then decided to produce leaflets when she reached home with a picture of
the wrecked pub and the unconscious landlord in full colour with a picture of
her in full black leather.

At the bottom of the leaflet would be the writing

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS TO THOSE WHO DISOBEY MADAME TATJANNA CRUELA!

THE BEAUTIFUL, BIG, BLONDE, BOSSY, BRUTAL, BUSTY VALKYRIE!

TO BE CONTINUED

Any comments to norselandic@hotmail.com