ANGELA THE NORSE WOMAN AND VALKYRIE 199
by Hamlet
GEMMA BEATS A COLOMBIAN COOK TOTALLY SENSELESS


Angela Tanya and Gemma felt so pleased with Themselves after the Man Beating
They had carried out at the La Oca bar in Medell�n.They stood together having
really beaten the living daylights out of 9 Colombian men and showing them in
no uncertain terms that They were the Bosses and the Law here. A heap of 9 men
lay on the pavement as the Three of Them stood over them in triumph There was
now a large sign outside the bar.

!BAR CERRADO PERMANENTE!

POR ORDEN DE LAS JUEZAS REALAS EXTERIORES NORSELANDICAS

BAR CLOSED PERMANENTLY!

BY ORDER OF THE ROYAL NORSELANDIC OVERSEAS JUDGES

They were now the Law and the Colombians had to be aware that the New Order
had begun and that they had to change their ways of machismo and ma�ana for
good!

They were all feeling hungry after Their exertions and wanted to try out the
local cuisine. Gemma knew all about Medell�n being the Judge responsible for
Colombia and Ecuador combined.

'I thought We could go to a place called Restaurant La Estancia. It's situated
in the Plaza Bolivar not far from here .It's not that clean actually certainly
not up to our high Norselandic standards .The food there is very cheap at only
$1(Norse Mark 15) for a meal .I need to go there as I want to check if it's
any cleaner than the last time I went there.

' If the owner Se�or Marcos hasn't cleaned up the kitchen there's going to be
trouble. Also there's a cook there and I cant stand his rude attitude at
all.What's more he looks so filthy all the time. I feel we're definitely going
to come to blows .After that I thought We'd try the nightlife out and go and
do some salsa dancing!'

'I can't wait to see what a Colombian restaurant is like as it's My first time
in this country!' said Angela.

'If it's really filthy We could always smash the place up, beat up the owner
and the cook and eat somewhere else' said Tanya wanting some more action.

They hailed a taxi that took them there. They were soon outside the restaurant
that was situated at the west side of the Plaza. There was an impressive view.
In the distance stood the cathedral Catedral Metropolitana that was a gigantic
building that was finally completed in 1931 being as Angela had found out the
largest brick church in South America.

They walked inside .It definitely was a dingy dark place. There was a long bar
in the corner where there were a few men sitting smoking and drinking .The bar
was known to serve aguardiente a fiery Colombian beer at very low prices. It
was the sort of place where the local men got blind drunk at night and the
only women were prostitutes.

It was quite clear that the men were leering at Them as They sat down .The 3
men stared to speak loudly in Spanish thinking that they would not be
understood.

'!Dios mira esas perras de cuero! !No importar�a a atornillar ellas! !Yo
aposta que perder�a yo mismo arriba sus miminos!'

'? Cu�l planeta vienen ellas? ! No he nunca visto mujeres de ese tama�o en mi
vida entera ! ?Est� usted seguro que ellas son mujeres y no son hombres
disfrazados?'

'God look at those blonde leather bitches! I wouldn't mind screwing them! I
bet I would get lost up their pussies!'

'What planet do they come from? I've never seen women that size in my entire
life Are you sure they're women and not men in disguise?'

All Three of Them ignored them as They say down. They were aware that this
place wasn't clean at all and there were beer stains and cigarette ash all
over the table. Gemma had ordered the owner Se�or Marcos to clean the place up
or else and She was furious that Her orders had been disobeyed.

A waitress came up to take their order .Her name was Dorita. She was filthy
too with greasy black hair and a dirty apron and she was chewing gum.

Gemma ordered the drinks first.

'Well have 3 aguardientes. Before you serve us Dorita you will change that
filthy apron now Also you will spit that disgusting gum out!

'Teneremos tres aguardientes. ! Antes de usted nosotras serve usted cambiar�
ese delantal mugriento ahora! !Tambi�n usted escupir� esa enc�a repugnante
fuera!'

'Si Se�ora Jueza Gemma' she shouted as she ran off into the distance. She had
already met Gemma before and knew that Her orders had to be obeyed without
question!

'Before We eat anything I want to inspect the kitchens!' said Gemma.

She walked towards the kitchen as the men in the corner wolfwhisted her.

'Are you going to do the cooling leather gringa?We'll have 3 big steaks well
done!'

'?Va usted hacer la cocina gringa de cuero?!Teneremos tres filetes grandes
bien dados!'

She would ignore them now but would deal with them later!

She walked straight into the kitchen. Standing there was the owner a short fat
man Se�or Marcos. He looked so small and inadequate with his balding head and
moustache compared to Her leather clad power.

'Well Marcos !I told you to clean this place up! I can't see any difference at
all! It's as filthy as ever!'

'Bien Marcos! Yo dec� usted a limpiar este lugar.! Bien no puedo ver alg�n
diferenc�a de ninguna manera! !Es como mugriento como siempre!'

'I sorry Judge Gemma! I tried as hard as possible but we Colombians cannot be
as clean as you Norselanders .You are too clean for us!

'Lo siento Jueza Gemma iIntent�a como duro como pod�a pero nosotros
colombianos no pueden ser como limpios como ustedes norselanderas! Ustedes son
demasiados limpios para nosotros!'

'I know you Colombians can't be as clean as us Norselanders but you can do
better than this!'

'!Yo s� que ustedes colombianos no pueden nunca ser como limpios como nosotros
norselanderas pero usted puede hacer merjor que este!'

She then walked up to a big fat man in the corner. He was the cook Raul a big
fat man with greasy hair. She walked straight up to him Not only was his apron
covered in grease ,he was smoking a cigarette with ash going into the frying
pan. He was cooking a steak. The cooking oil really stank too!

As She walked up to him She spoke to him in fluent Spanish

'Don't you know you're not supposed to smoke in public places especially in a
kitchen in a restaurant?'

'?No sabe usted que no supone a fumar en lugares publicos especialmente en una
cocina en un restaurante?'

He wanted to appear tough to Her in front of the manager

'Why don't you f-----k off back to your clean country you Norsi bitch and
leave us alone?'

'Porqu� no cogida apagado atras a su pa�s limipio su perra nors�a y deja
nosotros solos !'

'Perhaps you would like to make me you stinking fat pig! Why dont you try
throwing Me out now?' She said walking straight up to him.

'Tal vez usted gustar�a a mi hacer su cerdo hedorendo gordo? Porqu� no intenta
usted a mi aventar fuera ahora?'

He took hold of a meat cleaver next to him and made a lunge at Her hoping to
catch Her off guard.

He shouted at Her.

'I will kill you you Norsi witch!

'Yo matar� usted su bruja nors�a!'

She dodged out of the way with lightning speed as quick as lightning. She then
sunk Her fist deep into his large pot belly. He let out a piercing scream that
could be heard right across the restaurant as he grabbed his aching stomach.

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

At the same time he fell to his knees spraying blood and vomit all over Her
high heeled boots.

She then calmly put him into position almost upright and quickly landed a
right Uppercut Gym Kata Move into his chin causing his head to fly backwards.
Then She executed a Left Cross Move .His head spun round to the left as blood
and teeth flew out of his open mouth as he bellowed with pain once more.

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

He fell flat on the floor on his face.He began crawling trying to escape from
Her .He had never come across any woman or person with such amazing fighting
skills in his entire life!

She pulled him up with one hand as he roared in abject agony.

'What's the matter? Do you have trouble standing? Dont try running away from
Me you bastard! No one pulls a meat cleaver on Me and gets away with it!'

'?Que pasa? ?Tiene usted problemas parado? No intenta a escaparse desde me! su
cadr�n ! !Nadie se desgarra un cuchillo de carnecito en me y sali con le !'

She pulled him up by the neck as he carried on groaning begging for mercy.

'Please Madame Judge have mercy on me! Don't hit me any more! I didn't mean to
call you a Norsi witch!

'Por favor se�ora Jueza tenga compasi�n en me!! No me golpea alg�n m�s!! No
tuve la intenci�n a llamar usted una bruja Nors�a!'

She had no intention of showing him any mercy!She pushed him against the wall
.She stepped back and with perfect skill executed a Right Jab to his left eye
causing him to stumble backwards .She then grabbed him by his now bloody shirt
to stop him from falling backwards. He cried out in pain begging for mercy
that She had no intention of giving.

She pulled Her fist back and executed a brilliant Left hook Move causing a
huge gash nearly a centimeter wide to open under his left eye .His face was
now covered in blood. He began to scream in sheer torment as She let him go
flying out through the door to land in an unconscious heap in the middle of
the restaurant!

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

She stood over him in triumph Her boot heel in his neck staring at the three
men in the corner who were now silent

'?GUSTAR�AN USTEDES UNA PALIZA TAMBI�N?'

'WOULD YOU LIKE A BEATING TOO?'

Any comments to Norseland@hotmail.com