KIM'S FIRST EXPERIENCE WITH A TAXI DRIVER AFTER SHE ARRIVES IN ENGLAND FOR THE FIRST TIME
by Hamlet


It was a cold, dreary and drizzly January day as Kim waited for a taxi outside
London's Heathrow airport. The rain seemed to just carry on falling and there
seemed to be no end in sight .She was not used to such cold and what was worse
the people all seemed so cold and miserable too.

She also felt so exhausted after Her 23 hour flight from Stefansholm in Her
Nation Norseland by Norse Air that only stopped at Denver USA on the way. Her
flight was extremely comfortable as would be expected from all Norselandic
services. She shared a very smart cabin with one other Norse Woman Vanda and
the food and service was excellent up to the highest Norselandic standards the
best in the world, Yet She could not wait for the flight to be over and for
the plane to land at last.

She was now becoming really homesick as She longed to be back in Her home city
of Dannesborg .She longed for the warmth and the tropical heat of Her
Motherland. The City lay the south east of Her Nation in Assensborg Province
and was such a lovely clean place situated on the coast. Like 90% of Her
fellow Citizens She had never been out of Her Nation in Her life and like Them
never really wanted to .

She had come to England on a career break from the bank where She worked as a
Personal Banker at the Royal Southeastern Bank, to learn English and to learn
about the English way of life. She was going to work in a hotel as a
chambermaid for only £5.50 an hour (NM 110) the minimum wage which of course
with Her educational background having a PhD like so many Norse Women, She
would find totally demeaning and below Her enormous intelligence.

She was also going to stay with an English family called the Dawson's whom She
knew nothing about at all, except that they lived in a place called Stratford,
the father's name was Jim, the wife was called Mavis and they had a son called
Ken. She had spoken to Jim on the phone and could not understand a word he
said as he spoke in an accent that was quite unfamiliar to Her. The whole
prospect of what lay before Her filled Her with dread. How could She spend the
next 6 months of Her life in a cold wet country, living with a strange family
and doing some horrible job in a hotel?

Yet She knew that She was tough Norse Woman a descendant of Warrior Women the
Valkyries and there was no challenge that would be too much for Her to face.
She knew that as a Norselander She would not be abandoned when She was away
from Her Nation. She knew that She was the personal and private property of
The Queen Goddess and as such a Citizen the proudest position to b in the
whole world.

She would be cared for by the ROJ (Royal Overseas Judges) whose duty was to
look after every single Norselandic Citizen abroad and to make sure They
obeyed the Law of Norseland to which They were still subject to.The ROJ would
also ensure She was not mistreated and was well adjusted and happy .She had a
Judge assigned to Her to look after Her a Supervisor Judge Miranda
Haarderqvist and She had an interview with Her at 9AM tomorrow morning at the
Norselandi Embassy. She could not wait to meet another Norse Woman already!

She stood by the road as the rain carried on falling waiting for a taxi to
take Her to Stratford feeling so cold and dejected. No one had told Her that
the taxi drivers by Heathrow cheated foreigners especially charging outrageous
fares and that She could get an underground all the way to Stratford far more
cheaply.

Yet as far as She was concerned She might as well be in Mars.She longed to be
back in Her Motherland Norseland and for its lovely tropical climate and to
see the colours of the flowers once again. She also felt so self conscious
being so different. For a start She was so much bigger and taller than the
people all of whom seemed to be such wimps in comparison to Her. She was
dressed completely in leather like all Norse Women wearing a long black
leather trench coat. high heeled boots and shiny leather gloves that with Her
long blonde hair and height made Her look so stunning and it was clear people
could not take their eyes off Her.

Eventually a taxi pulled up.

The driver looked out of the window. He looked really rough to Her with his
face unshaven and slightly dirty with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. He
could not keep his eyes off Her large protruding breasts .There was something
about him that really got on Her nerves! What was more he clearly thought She
was just another stupid foreigner whom he could easily cheat and overcharge.

'So where to my luv?' he said in his almost incomprehensible Cockney accent.

'I would like to go to Stratford to 22 Lawes Road.'� She replied getting so
annoyed that he was talking to Her breasts not Her face.

'Right luv it'll cost you though it's right the ovver soid of London miles
away!'

'I would like you to tell Me exactly how much it will cost! What's more you
will address Me in My face and not in My breasts!'

'Sorry luv.You really 'ave such a luvly pair of knockers !Dunno luv, could be
as much as 100 knicker.'

'So what's a knicker then?'

'Sorry luv I can see you are foreign, a knicker's a pound.I can see you've
just arrived 'ere so where you from?

'Norseland actually'

Is that somewhere in Europe luv?'

She did not even bother to answer him he seemed so stupid.

She did a quick calculation on Her calculator. That was NM� 2000 in Her money!

'And how far is Stratford from here?'

'Dunno luv about 20 miles.'

She did a quick calculation. That was 32 kilometers!

'So you are charging� over £3 a mile?' She said as She did another quick
calculation in Her head.

'Well take it or leave it luv. There's plenty more where you come from !' from
he chortled treating Her as if She was an idiot.

She knew that in Her Nation all taxis were regulated by Law and they could
only charge £1 per (NM20) kilometer or they could be reported to the Judges.

'I will only pay you £32 and no more and if you don't get Me there within 1
hour I will reduce the payment by 50p a minute!' She said demonstrating Her
assertiveness knowledge of British currency.

'Who the f--k do you fink you are! If you don't want to pay me 100 notes luv
you can travel some ovver way.What's more it'll take me at least three hours
to get to Stratford.The traffic's bleedin' terrible at this time! I knows
you're a foreigner from Norway or some ovver f----g foreign place 'oive never
'erd of but don't tell me how much to charge or how long to take! Now if you
don't mind just f----k off and I'll find some ovver punter!'

He was about to drive off. Yet suddenly She opened the back door and within a
second was inside the taxi

With another move She held him by the hair in Her strong leather gloved
hand.The cigarette dropped from his mouth at once. He screamed in agony.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!

'So what's your name arsehole?'

'JEEFF!!! he yelled as She pulled harder.

'Listen Jeff and listed well! I've just arrived in your cold country after a
long flight from My Nation Norseland which being an ignorant bastard you've
probably never heard of. I don't lke your stupid ignorant attitude. I am tired
and hungry so don't mess with Me! You will drive Me to Stratford in an hour
and I will only pay you £32 and maybe less depending on the service you give
Me!'

' You will shut up for the whole journey and you will not call Me love as I'm
definitely not your love you ugly shithead! What's more don't you dare smoke
in this taxi as it's a filthy disgusting habit that's banned in My Nation and
if I see a cigarette in your mouth again n this journey I will ran it down
your stinking throat. If you give Me any trouble I will simply force you to
stop the taxi and I will drive Myself with you giving directions! Also I will
report you to My Supervisor Judge Haarderqvist and She will deal with you
mercilessly for daring to insult a Norse Woman like Me!'

She moved Her leather clad fingers up and down his throat with Her other hand
as he groaned in agony as the pain was excruciating.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

'Is that understood you smelly bastard?You will address Me as Ms Andersson!'

'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!NO MORRREEEEEE!!!!!

'YES MS ANDERSSON!!' he wailed his screams could be heard for at leas a mile
away.

Any comments please to Norseland@hotmail.com