AKELLA THE AVENGER by Hamlet DAG THE DA Just then Akella could see the informer Guiterrez riding towards Her in the distance 'Hello Mistress Akella it's Guiterrez again!I thought I would warn you again The Alcalde is prepared for your attack.He regards you as worse than any terrorist. There are 30 Spanish troops ready to confront you all fully armed with cannons And guns.' "Hola amante de Akella Gutierrez una vez m#s!pens' que advierto que una vez m#s, el Alcalde est# preparado para el ataque.El que te tiene como peor que cualquier terrorista .Hay 30 tropas espa#olas dispuestos a enfrentar todos completamente armados con ca#ones y fusiles". 'The Alcalde and Major Quintero want you dead so be prepared. As I have said there are at least five of us including myself who want to surrender. There are probably more. We realise you and your Companion Dag are a brilliant swordfighters. Also we do not want to end up as cripples. We promise we will surrender. We love you Mistress Akella and many of the Spanish army believe you Buccaneera are doing a wonderful job conquering our country!' "El Alcalde y los principales Quintero desea muerto as# que est' preparado. Como ya he dicho hay al menos cinco de nosotros entre los que me incluyo que quieren entregar. Hay probablemente m#s. Nos damos cuenta que usted y su compa#ero Dag son un brillante escrimidores. Tambi'n no queremos terminar como atrofia. Prometemos entregar. Nos encanta que Amante Akella y muchas de las fuerzas armadas espa#olas Buccaneera creo que est#n haciendo un trabajo maravilloso conquistar nuestro pa#s! ". 'Thank you Guiterrez Of course we do a marvellous job in eradicating crime and bringing Norselandic civilization to you Spaniards.That's why the Alcalde is so jealous of Me as We expose his total and utter incompetence. You and the other Spanish troops will surrender to Me by throwing down your weapons and lying prostrate on the ground. If I think for one moment you are resisting I will smash every bone in your body just like I will to all the other Spanish troops. Remember the Buccaneera will be taking over California just as we took over the Bothnian Islands!' "Muchas Gracias Gutierrez Por supuesto, hacen un trabajo magn#fico en erradicar la delincuencia y la civilizaci#n Norselandica a los espa#oles.es por eso que el Alcalde es tan celoso de m# como exponemos su total y absoluta incompetencia. Usted y los dem#s las tropas espa#olas se entrega a M# arrojando sus armas y postrados en el suelo. Si me pongo a pensar por un momento que se resisten a mate todos los huesos de su cuerpo, as# que voy a todas las dem#s tropas espa#olas. Recuerde que el Buccaneera va a tomar en California, justo como nos hicimos cargo de la Islas Botnia! ". 'Just understand that soon you will be the subjects of the Queen Goddess and obey Me The Queen Goddess is about to institute the Queen Dom of Righteousness!!' S#lo entiendan que muy pronto ser#n los temas de la Reina y diosa Me obedezcan La Reina Diosa esta a punto de iniciar la Reina Dom de Justicia!! ". 'Yes Mistress Akella I understand I promise I will surrender as will many of the other Spanish troops especially once they see you are winning so easily!' 'Just remember Mistress Akella underneath most Spanish troops are wimps-once they know they are losing they will surrender too.After all most of them joined the Spanish troops for a quiet life, not to have a fight with you Mistress Akella a One Woman Army!' "S# Amante Akella, entiendo que debo prometo que entrega como muchas de las otras tropas espa#olas especialmente una vez que te ven ganar tan f#cilmente!" " S#lo recuerdo Amante Akella las tropas bajo la mayor#a de los espa#oles son unos flojos de una vez que saben que est#n perdiendo vayan a entregar demasiado.Despu's de todo la mayor#a de ellos se unieron a las tropas espa#olas de una vida tranquila, que no tengan una lucha con usted un amante Akella Mujer Ej'rcito! 'That's fine .I will see you later when you become My Subject!' Est# bien .espero verlos m#s tarde, cuando se convirti# en mi tema She and Dag the Dagger rode on until they was outside the Alcalde's palace in Los Angeles.It was a new sumptuous that had been but recently largely from the taxes he stole from the poor peons. Only about a year ago it had been built at considerable expense. How would they feel if it was the scene of a fight and was soon to become Her Headquarters! She stood outside in all Her shiny black leather wonder looking so impressive. She was sure that all 30 Spanish troops Officers inside were really terrified of the awful prospect of possible death that awaited them. She looked up and could see at least 6 Spanish troops marksmen in the distance. She could see no sign of The Alcalde the bloody coward. He was almost certainly cringing inside! Suddenly She could hear Major Quintero peak to me from inside the building. ' I've got 30 Spanish troops Officers with guns and cannons inside the Alcalde's Mansion .You and your colleaugues might be very brilliant fighters who always wins but you cant take on 30 soldiers some of whom are armed with orders to kill you. You cannot take over all of California on your own!' " Tengo 30 tropas espa#olas oficiales con las pistolas y los ca#ones dentro de la Mansi#n del Alcalde .Usted y su colleaugues podr#a ser muy brillantes luchadores que siempre gana pero no puedes asumir 30 soldados algunos de ellos armados con #rdenes de matar. Usted no puede tomar a su cargo la totalidad de California en su propia! " She called back on Her loudspeaker She had brought along with Her. 'Look here Quintero I'm not the slightest bit frightened of your 30 Spanish troops Officers. You don't seem to understand you lump of shit that We Buccaneera are invincible-We can take on your 30 Officers easily and beat them.I cannot lose a fight you idiot!' 'I have not committed any crimes.Every killing and beating I have done has been a righteous act in my War against crime.I am a Buccaneera and a crime fighter and will continue killing and maiming until I have eradicated every Spanish criminal.It is you who are a criminal by failing to do anything about crime and oppressing the peons taking bribes and making friends with criminals. You will pay for your sins and crimes with your life!' 'If you want to arrest Us why don't you come out and do it yourself. Why don't you challenge Me on your own you pathetic coward.You're too frightened aren't you.Why do you get your troops to do your dirty work? Come out and get Me on your own and spare the lives of your soldiers!' Mire aqu# Quintero no soy la m#s m#nima asustado de su 30 las tropas espa#olas . Parece que usted no le entiendo trozos de mierda que nos Buccaneera son invencibles , ya que nos podemos llevar a su Mesa 30 f#cilmente y les golpearon.I no puede perder una pelea que idiota!" " Yo no he cometido ning#n crimen.Cada asesinato y los golpes que he hecho ha sido un justo acto en mi Guerra contra la delincuencia.Yo soy un Buccaneera y un luchador contra el crimen y seguir# matando y mutilando hasta que me han erradicado cada penal Espa#ol.Es usted que es un criminal por no hacer nada sobre el crimen y opresi#n de los peones recibir sobornos y hacer amigos con los criminales. Que tendr# que pagar por tus pecados y cr#menes con su vida!" " Si desea detener Nosotros #por qu' no salir y hacerlo tu mismo. #Por qu' no me reten por su propia cuenta que pat'tico cobarde.Que eres demasiado asustado , #no se. #Por qu' usted obtiene sus tropas que hagan el trabajo sucio? Salir y Me de su propia y salvar las vidas de sus soldados! " There was no reply.He really knew that She was right and that he had no answer.In all wars the first step of the Buccaneera was to win the psychological war-to demoralise the enemy and then begin the physical attack.She was definitely winning that war! She decided to broadcast to the Spanish troops themselves on Her loudspeaker 'This is Akella the Avenger speaking asking you to surrender.You may be armed with guns and cannons but you cannot win.We are about to attack the Alcald'e Palace. We are a Two Person Army.You can surrender by giving up you weapons and falling on the ground and calling out'Have mercy on me Madame Akella a sinner!' "Esto es Akella la Avengera que habla le pide que entregue.puede ser armados con fusiles y ca#ones pero no puede ganar.estamos a punto de atacar a la Alcald'e Palacio. Somos un ej'rcito Dos Personas.Se puede entregar de renunciar a las armas y que caigan al suelo y llamando a "ten misericordia de m# Madame Akella un pecador She knew that already 5 would definitely surrender.More would give up once they knew they would lose the battle as Guitterez had said.After all most of them had joined the Spanish troops just as a steady job, not to end up fighting one Norse Woman, especially one who was invincible like Her ! She had planned the attack.She and Dag would break through the gates of the Alcalde's palace on their horses riding at full speed. to protect themselves. They would use one of the bodies of the dead Spanish troop's officers, strapped to Her Horse as a human shield. Once inside the Alcalde's Palace the fight would well and truly begin. Suddenly a shot was fired from the roof of the Palace. It hit the Her saddle. She saw where the shot had come from.Even with telescopic sights he could not hit her! Yet She was an expert shot.She aimed Her gun and with one shot hit one soldier .He let out a loud scream and went tumbling down the side of the building.1 down, 29 and probably less to go! Dag moved forward increasing his speed speed going straight towards the palace. Shots were being fired from the building, but none hit Him.Instead they hit the dead body that was now covered in blood.Bullets were now flying Off the body and it was being sprayed with blood.He increased the speed on his charger holding a lethal steel chain called a halsbraaker . He was now riding full speed and heading straight towards the closed gates of the Alcalde's palace Suddenly he rode as hard as he could and smashed the haalbraker against the gates CRAAAAAASSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! With all the power at his disposal He rode his horse with full force Had straight into the gate.It went flying open as He let out a bloodcurdling cry. AWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! He was inside the compound and had achieved His first objective.Akella rode right behind him .The Spanish troops inside were dressed in visors with guns and swords. She could tell they were really frightened as they all drew away, letting them through. She first of all dumped the dead bodies on the ground as She promised to. Her next objective was to take out the snipers on the roof. She took cover behind a tree .There were 5 snipers altogether. She fired at once and hit the first one in the neck. He let out a piercing scream as he Fell from the roof hitting the ground hard. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! The next one fired but the bullet missed the mark easily. What hopeless shots! She fired at once and saw his head split open and blood pour out in a torrent. She decided to take the other 3 out with Her flick knives. A shot rang out.She fell to the ground and threw the knife with deadly precision.It went straight through a soldier's throat as he went crashing down to the ground. The next one tried to fire.She aimed at the hand .It found its mark precisely.The knife went right through and She could hear the roar of pain as he landed in a heap on the ground yelling with pain. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!! The last one fired. She could hear the bullet whistle past her. He looked in Terror as she aimed the knife. She threw again with deadly precision.It went straight into his eye piercing right through his head.He let out a loud Scream and landed with a thud on the ground. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! 6 down, 24 or more like 15 to go.The Spanish troops looked in utter amazement at this amazing display of riding, shooting and knife throwing skills.They had clearly never seen anything like it in their lives. She stood before them in all her black leather power. 'Right you all have a very simple choice-surrender or die.You've just seen 6 of your colleagues die in less than 5 minutes.Is it really worth dying for a bastard like the Alcalde?' 'Of course if you all really want a fight I will be happy to oblige.' SO COME ON YOU BASTARDS LET THE FIGHT BEGIN!' AS# QUE VENGA, CABRONES QUE LA LUCHA EMPIEZA! ". Any comments or suggestions for future Episodes to norselandic@hotmail.com