Female essence
by Chameleon

My email address: ThinkTruth@Hotmail.com

It can be healthy for a stable man to be shaken up a little. Emotional turmoil can do wonders for uptight and stagnated men, but if he were unstable to begin with, it would be like shaking a half-rotten tree. Not only leaves, but also branches would break off and fall down. The psychological defence, that was not much more than a bluff to begin with, becomes shattered, with a prevailing and unbearable anxiety as one of the results. It takes strength to be dominated.

I have radar for detecting dominating tendencies in other people, no matter how well they're hidden, with the possible exception of a few very clever women. I now very well how to put up a barrier, and if I'm in a situation where the other person is hopelessly persistent, I simply flee. But usually, bluff is more than enough. I can act courageous, self assure, and simply as someone you don't want to mess with. And to some extent it would be true also, but never in the long run. If someone constantly tests me, my total lack of endurance would cause me to stumble, and then there is only one thing to do: Get the hell out of there.

Until a year before I met Donna, I hadn't believed in the existence of strong women. I believed that if a woman had worked up some muscles, she would still look for a man who was stronger than her. She wanted to be the weak part of the relationship no matter what. Even if she was the strongest, she would pretend not to be.

I felt I got that confirmed when a friend of mine, Matthew, got together with Sarah. Matthew was a fairly small man who ran a mile and took a few push-ups a couple of times per week. Sarah was more into weight training, but with her clothes on, she just looked a little bigger than the average woman. She was about 5 feet and 6 inches tall, and with that, a few inches shorter than Matthew.

I noticed that she looked strong the first time I met them together, and took particularly notice of her wrists, that was unusually thick for a woman. I worked out myself at that time, and didn't for one second believe that she was stronger than I was. I remember thinking that she might be able to match Matthew though, and was a little curious about that.

She was all girlie with him, maybe more so than any of his previous girlfriends. A real male ego builder was who she was, and at one time I paid them a visit, she told me that he had helped her to change the tires, fix her computer, and open a jar. I was a little disappointed because of my fascination of the idea that she was strong, but it fitted well with my world-view.

-"How much do you lift in bench press?", I asked.

-"Not so much.", she answered to avoid the question.

That made me a little suspicious. I remembered a girl in high school that was quite so strong. She was probably the nicest girl in the class, and for some reason, I told her once that I had lifted 155 pounds on the bench press machine. That was absolutely nothing to brag about for a man, since you probably lift at least 25% more with a machine than with proper weights. But it was an improvement for me, and she wasn't the girl to put a man down.

-"Wow.", she answered with no hint of irony. "I could never do that."

Later it turned out that she lifted at least 135 pounds in regular bench press, so 155 pounds with the machine would simply not have been a problem for her.

I let it rest though. She was obviously happy with Matthew, and if that was the way she soothed him, I wasn't going to be the snake in paradise.

I continued to visit them at least once per week. Matthew and I loved computer games, and we could play Civilisation until morning broke and Sarah came in to ask if we wanted breakfast. She was the perfect girlfriend, and I told him how much I envied him. He liked that, and looked very satisfied, but could add that she sometimes was a nag.

-"You just have to be firm with them. Women need that. You have to act like a man.", he said with a proud look.

I thought that it was a little pathetic since he always had a tendency to be pushed around by his earlier girlfriends. But I'm a friend, and a proper friend is dishonestly supportive.

One evening I came to play a racing game with him that he'd recently bought with Sarah's money. He was at that time unemployed, and she didn't want him to suffer from the terrible disease of boredom.

The time was 10 p.m., and Sarah had already gone to bed. She had a long way to work, and usually got up around 5.30 a.m. in the morning. The racing game was fantastically fun, and with two computers connected with a cable, we played with each our steering wheels. We screamed and shouted as we competed, and yelled swearwords every time the car flipped over due to reckless driving.

After half an hour, a not so happy Sarah opened the door in her night-dress.

-"Could you keep it down? I have to get up early in the morning."

I could hear in her voice that she had caught a cold.

-"Yeah-", Matthew answered without even looking at her, and sort of waved her off with his arm.

She left and I felt a little shameful. But Matthew seemed almost unaffected, and soon he burst out his blessings and swearing as before. I was sort of caught up in it, and demonstrated human beings belief that if they're in majority, they're really not that obliged to be considerate.

We forgot about Sarah, until two hours had passed and the door again opened. It was a different Sarah this time. Her look was sour, and there was something cold and undefined in her eyes. Matthew hardly registered her.

-"Matthew, tell your friend to leave.", she said with a serious voice, but got another waving hand as a response.

I stopped the driving immediately.

-"Hey, don't stop!", he burst out as we were close to the finish-line.

-"I think I should go.", I said and stood up.

-"Don't go.", he said and sort of blocked my path with his arm. "Sarah, go to bed, we'll keep it down."

My friend, that I started to realise was a moron, didn't register the darkened look in her eyes as a response to his words. She just stood there for a few seconds with her chest going up and down, before she repeated: "Matthew, tell your friend to leave."

I hurried towards the door and didn't get so much as a look from her as I passed her. Her eyes were fixed at Matthew who wasn't at all pleased with the situation.

-"He's not gonna leave!", he said as he raised his pointy-finger.

She seemed unaffected and walked slowly up to him.

-"Switch of the computer."

He started to shake his head.

-"If you don't get the hell out of the room, I'm gonna throw you out.", he said with his finger still raised.

As in a trance, I still stood in the door opening and saw what happened.

-"Switch - off - the computer.", she repeated.

Her voice gave me a chill, but it obviously didn't have the same amount of effect on Matthew.

-"I mean it. If you don't get out of the room, I'll- I'll throw you out."

He wasn't quite as self-assure any longer, but it was clear that my presence gave him the impression that he had something to prove.

Without any further warning, she grabbed his hair with one hand and slammed it into the desk.

-"Is that clear enough for you?!- No?!", and again his forehead met solid wood.

He had a confused look, and waved his arms ineffectually as she still had a grab-hold on his hair. Suddenly she noticed me.

-"Get - out!", she said and immediately woke me up from the trance. Her tone of voice and body language, together with the frightening vision of her violence, wiped out all desire to protect my friend and replaced it with fear. As a pathetic coward, I ran out of the house with my coat under my arm and my shoes in my hand.

I didn't dare to call him the next day, but was truly worried, and waited anxiously for the phone to ring. It did, late in the evening.

-"It's Matthew."

-"Hi, how did it go?"

There was a short silence.

-"It's ok now."

-"What happened after I left?"

There was another silence.

-"We talked."

-"Ok, so you have sorted things out?"

After a few more seconds he said:

-"Yeah-"

The next time I visited him, for the first time, Sarah opened the door. She acted as if nothing had happened, and was all friendly and forthcoming. It felt a little bizarre though, and a creepy music in the background would have been appropriate to describe the suspicion I had of the tsunami waiting to break through the idyllic surface.

She looked very fresh though. Her blond, half-long hair with a hint of curls was set up in a ponytail, displaying a beautiful neck. She wore blue pants and a tight, red sweater that gave credit to her nice breasts, and lay beautifully over her hips.

-"He's in his room. Just go in."

So I did, as she placed herself in a couch in the living room with a book.

We started to play Civilisation, and it was quite fun for a while, although he did seem a little unfocused. Suddenly he stood up as if something had bit him in the arse.

-"I have to-"

He went put of the room and into the hallway, before he opened the door to the living room.

-"Sarah."

-"Yes."

-"I forgot about the dishes. I'll do them now.", he said nervously.

-"Go and play with your friend."

Time went by and Matthew seemed to adjust to the new regime. I continued to visit him, but had to come earlier than before, since there was no talk any longer about playing during the night. The amusing thing is that Sarah hadn't forbidden it, but he simply didn't take the risk of waking her up again.

But one day, something had happened. Sarah was visiting a friend when I came, and as Matthew opened up, I could see that his face was red.

-"Is something wrong?", I asked.

He didn't answer, but walked in front of me into the kitchen where he had a cup of coffee waiting for him.

-"Has something happened?", I asked after sitting down at the kitchen table.

He waved off the question and almost looked as if he was about to cry.

-"Has she beaten you up again?"

Judging the look in his eyes, I hadn't exactly hit the nail on its head, but wasn't so far from it either.

-"You can't let her beat you up. Say to her that you'll leave her if she does it again."

-"She didn't beat me up."

-"What happened?"

He was still reluctant to answer, but then he said with an almost whispering voice, while looking at his flat hand in its move over the table surface:

-"She spanked me."

-"Hmm?"

-"She spanked me.", he repeated a little louder.

-"She spanked you?", I asked in disbelief.

-"Yes"

I thought about it for a few seconds.

-"You can't let her treat you like this. You have to leave her."

At first he didn't answer, but then he looked directly into my eyes and said:

-"It was my fault. I lied to her. I knew she would get upset if she found out."

I shook my head and felt I was talking to a battered wife. -Although he was no wife.

Her domination of him became more and more apparent as I continued to visit them, especially the times when I didn't come to play games. On the surface, things might usually have appeared quite normal to the unobservant spectator, but you didn't have to dig in deep to see what was really going on. He was constantly observing her when she was in the same room, as if to see if she was still happy with him. If she unexpectedly talked to him, you could almost see a twitch in his body as he tensioned up to give her his full attention. And if they sat together in the couch with her arm discretely around his or on his thigh, he would never get up without getting some sort of permission from her first, at least as much as a consenting look.

Sometime she wouldn't even mind my presence, and could place him between her legs on the couch and start to cuddle with him. She would kiss and fondle him while he talked to me, until his face turned red as a tomato. But, at the same time, you could see he had the time of his life. You wouldn't need to be Freud to figure out what would happen after I left.

A little tiny boy in me envied him, but I knew I wouldn't be able to take the pressure. In that sense, he was much stronger than I was. I started to get scared of my own fascination, and swore that if I ever met a strong and dominant woman, I would keep her at an arm-length distance.

I worked halftime as a research assistant at the institute of occupational medicine, and was given the project of measuring magnetic radiation from computer monitors. I had studied the topic of magnetic fields and had recently held a lecture to the other members of the institute about the topic. It turned out, however, that the people funding the project wasn't satisfied with the institute leader's, a woman professor, decision to leave it to an assistant, so she lent a researcher from another institute to secure the quality of my work. Her name was Donna.

Donna was a medical doctor with an additional education in physics as well as mathematics. At the age of 27, she was already working on a doctorate, and was totally overqualified for this project. In all, we were not going to conduct any profound analysis, only collect data and pass them on. But Donna saw this as a relaxing break from her research, and the salary she was given was adjusted to her educational level, and not to the importance of her task. She was simply going to monitor me, nothing more.

I immediately sensed there was something special about her the first time we met in my office. She had a body shape that reminded me of Sarah, but she was a little thinner around the waist and stood perhaps an inch taller. Her handshake was firm, and she looked directly in to my eyes with a disturbing look of confidence. She wore a nice red blouse and a white skirt that reached her to her knees, and looked like she had dressed up for the occasion.

-"So you're the clever boy they're talking about."

-"Hah?"

-"I've heard you have no medical education, and still they give you this project."

-"It hasn't got so much to do with medicine."

-"Hasn't it?"

-"More physics."

-"So, you have an education in physics?"

-"Yes- One university exam."

-"One?", she smiled and almost laughed.

How I originally got the job is a long story I wont bother to tell, but as I did the most idiotic task for the other members of the institute, posting letters as an example, I tried my very best to use my adapting skills to fit into the environment. I can do that very effectively, and managed to give them the impression that I had a lot of knowledge about medicine. To impress someone who hasn't got the clue about what you're talking about is not so hard. You just have to act self-assure. But with someone who has ten years of education in the field- That's another story. The first premises to accomplish such a task is, perhaps contrary to what you may think, don't bluff. Never bluff. Never even dream of bluffing. Make sure that everything you say is correct and that you don't just quote something you've read, but actually have a minimum of understanding of what you're talking about.

The second premises is: Choose a topic a little aside of what they have specialised in. If you're lucky, you might mention something they have forgotten from their basic learning, and that would impress them more than if you just say something they read in an article yesterday. Be wise, and formulate it in a question. In that way you're invulnerable.

The first day, I asked the institute leader the following question: "Is it so that phenylalanine is the aminoacid the body uses to produce dopamine?" She looked as if she had to think about it for a minute. "Yes", she answered with slight insecurity.

Mission accomplished.

With a few moths of that, I was beginning to get an reputation as someone a little out of the ordinary, and that was probably the reason way the institute leader offered me to study and hold the lecture in the topic of magnetic fields. I did the necessary preparations, and it became a success. So, with increased confidence in my skills, I was finally given this task that brought me together with Donna.

Donna was curious about me, and as I was not going to collect any data before the next day, she suggested that we placed ourselves on the lawn outside of the institute to catch a little sunlight. There she started to ask questions, and it didn't take her long to figure out that my knowledge in medicine consisted of small, isolated islands with an endless void between them. It was a little humiliating, but I answered all questions truthfully, as I usually do, and thereby, at least, wasn't caught in a bluff. There was a hint of irony in her facial expression though, as the naked truth appeared to her.

-"Well, you won't need much knowledge for this.", she said.

-"No"

I thought I sensed a strange reaction after she had made up her opinion about my medical skills. I had expected her to see me as less of a man, but for some reason, which I simply couldn't grasp, she started to look at me the way women do when they ask themselves whether the man in front of them might be romantically interesting. She became more focused when I talked, gave me brief looks when she didn't think I noticed, and got this examining, bewildered look in her eyes when she spoke to me, as if my reaction towards her was very important.

It was a good thing she acted that way, because being just a few years younger than her, with all that she had got to show for, I could easily have developed a massive inferiority complex.

In all, there was a shift in how she related to what I said. Since there wasn't any meaning in discussing the topic of medicine any longer, I tried to find other topics where I might have more success in impressing her with my knowledge. Apparently I succeeded, and when we for example discussed history, a topic we sheared a common interest in, I mentioned that I had read in the book "History of England", by David Hume. When she made eyes at me, surprised at my devoted self-study, I hurried to underline that I hadn't read the whole book. -But she still seemed impressed. The truth was that I had only downloaded it from the net and looked at it for a few minutes. I had just broken the golden rule of not bluffing.

As we sat there, I started to discover something, though. She continued with the positive feedback almost regardless of what I said. I told her about my reflections about music, and she seemed impressed. I told her that I wrote poems, and she seemed impressed. And I told her I managed to fix a problem on my computer the day before, and-, yes, you guessed correctly, she seemed impressed.

I might have a male ego, but I'm not an idiot. -Not that I got irritated, far from it. The fact that she acted that way was nothing but a compliment. -And a true woman's duty, I thought a little ironically. Glad to be such an object of desire, I asked her if she wanted to join me to a Chinese restaurant. She seemed happy to accept. We drove off in her car (since I had none), and reached our destination within a few minutes.

As we sat at the restaurant table, I came to think of that so far, all the conversations had been about me.

-"So, how do you spend your spare time?"

-"I train jujitsu."

-"What belt?"

-"Black"

I don't think my mind had made so many connections in such a short time ever before. Images of Sarah popped up in my mind, and I suddenly saw the resemblance between her initial soothing of Matthew, and Donna's behaviour towards me. My heart started to pound, and anxiously I feared that I had already hooked myself so much up in the situation that it was too late to retract. My mind searched for excuses to leave her after the meal.

Donna immediately sensed my reaction, but I didn't believe that she knew how to interpret it. She looked a little bewildered before she said after a few seconds of silence:

-"I know some men don't think women should be involved in fighting sports. I understand, but I only did it for fun. It's much more fun than to do monotone repetitions of exercises in a gym."

She seemed so harmless when she made excuses for her self like that. I almost felt sorry for her, sitting there in her confused and insecure state of mind. No way could such a woman have slammed her boyfriend's head on a desk. I become more relaxed.

With my sense of security re-established, I started to feel like the king of the situation. A beautiful and highly intelligent woman was attracted to me, and I began to picture us in a more romantic context. Ok, I saw myself fucking her hard. She was so vulnerable, and I was going to take her forcefully, punish her in the most pleasurable way for being so insecure. God, I was going to make her love me.

With this new devilish feeling overpowering my patience, I could hardly wait to bring her home with me. But I wasn't totally sure whether the fish was well captured, on land.

-"Would you like to come home with me afterwards and look at my stamp collection?", I asked as a joke.

-"Do you have a stamp collection?"

-"Well, actually- yes.", I said and laughed.

-"Then I would like to come. I collected stamps myself when I was younger."

Although a little surprised by her answer, I felt I had almost got the confirmation I needed.

Ten minutes after, we sat in her car, and I remember peeking at her body as we enjoyed the album "The dark side of the moon" by Pink Floyd from the car stereo. For amusement, I started the fifth song, "The great gig in the sky", and with that, heard a musical presentation of a female orgasm, while thinking how great it would be to come between her legs. I felt I had total control, and pulled the handle to lay back my seat, before I closed my eyes and let the song be the accompaniment of my fantasies.

For a brief moment I opened my eyes and saw Donna covering her cheek with her hand, so that I couldn't see her face. I had no idea what it meant, and went back to my dreams.

The last song on the CD was playing and I wondered why on earth it took so long to reach my apartment. I opened my eyes, and to my surprise, we were no longer in the city, but on a deserted road on the countryside. At first I was so confused that I couldn't say a word.

-"Wh- Ha?"

She didn't answer.

-"Why are we here?"

-"I'll tell you a little later.", she answered and kept her eyes fixed on the road.

She had a serious look on her face that wasn't at all reassuring. I looked in disbelief at what my eyes saw, but my mind couldn't comprehend.

-"Why are we here?", I repeated but got no response.

-"Hey!"

-Still no answer. A slight worry was about to manifest itself, but I was still mainly confused.

-"What's going on?", I said in a calmer voice.

-"I'll tell you when we have gotten out of this car."

I took a deep breath. The idea of her harmless nature hadn't quite left the system, and I still searched for a natural way to explain to this bizarre situation.

-"Can't you just tell me where we're going?"

-"No"

-"Why?"

-"You'll find out."

Now I really started to get anxious. My breathing got heavier.

-"Are you kidnapping me or something?"

-"Something like that, yes."

It sounded so unreal that I didn't know if I should take it seriously.

-"So, what's the ransom?.. And who on earth is going to pay? I bet most people who know me would pay you for not releasing me.", I said as an attempted joke.

-"There is no ransom."

She had still not looked at me once, just answered in voice totally free of emotions.

-"What is this?", I asked as my mind felt disturbingly emptied out.

-"More serious than you seem to be willing to realise, but not as bad as your worst nightmare."

-"I'm gonna pull the handbrake.", I threatened.

-"Try."

Being offensive reduced the fear, and I decided to act. In a fast move I took hold on the handbrake, just to get Donnas hand around my wrist in a squeeze that sent an excruciating pain through my bones.

-"Ahh!", I moaned and let go. So did Donna, and placed her hand back on the steering wheel as if nothing had happened.

Now the situation was for real. I felt like a helpless little boy and started to recollect the past impression of her, to try to restore some feeling of safety.

-"Could you please tell me where we're going?"

She got a milder expression in her face.

-"Not yet."

-"When will you tell me?"

She smiled but gave no answer. I had no option but to wait and see what happened. My wrist still hurt and was constant reminder of the lack of a safety net in the situation. She could be a total psychopath for all I knew. Or maybe she just hated men and wanted to take it all out on me. The more I thought, the more scared I got, and eventually I could not take it any longer. I tried to pull myself together.

-"Please, Donna, can't you say what you're gonna do to me?", I said with a pathetic voice.

She got a satisfied look in her face.

-"Sure", she said and shook my knee. "In a minute."

A couple of minutes after she drove into a wooden road, and within the next moments, we ended up by a lake. She stopped the engine and turned towards me.

-"Join me down by the lake, and I'll tell you everything."

-"Are you going to drown me?", I asked anxiously.

She brushed my hair.

-"No, I'm not going to drown you."

She went out of the car, and in a controlled state of fear, I followed her until we stood a few yards from the water.

-"This is my fear.", she said while gazing at the lake.

I looked at her. A strange, surreal feeling came over me. It was as if the fear had been placed behind a glass wall. It was still there, but I couldn't sense it.

-"What do you mean?"

-"This, the water. I've been terrified of water since I was a child."

-"Why?"

-"I don't know. It's irrational."

She turned towards me.

-"Like your fear."

-"My fear?"

-"Your fear of me."

I became more awake, and a nervous feeling took hold on me.

-"I fear you because you kidnapped me."

-"Was it then you started to fear me?"

I didn't answer and looked bewildered as my mind refused to collect my thoughts.

-"You see, I thought it was in the restaurant."

-"Yes", I answered and nodded. My system relaxed as if my sub-conscience finally had got some kind of grip of the situation. Nothing stood clear to me though.

-"But then it disappeared. Why?"

-"You seemed vulnerable."

She nodded.

-"Yes. The oldest trick in the world. If a man feels threatened- seem vulnerable. It works with all men. Young and old, intelligent and stupid- Why?"

-"I don't know."

-"Because you want to believe it. It isn't more complicated than that. It's a blessing really, because it makes it so easy for us to handle you. I don't think I would want it any other way."

-"Why did you bring me down here?"

-"Not so fast- Do you know what attract me the most in a man?"

-"No"

-"Fear. His uncontrolled fear that he only can bear if he locks it up in his mental vault. But I'm gonna force it open and hold his fear in front of him so he can't look away. I will make him tremble and beg me to spare him."

-"I'll beg."

She smiled. Her eyes were again fixed at the water.

-"I don't need you to beg. You have already. I just need you to help me."

-"With what?"

-"Overcoming my fear."

-"For water?"

-"Yes"

-"How?"

-"Tell me, why do you fear women?"

-"I don't fear women."

-"Yes you do."

-"No"

-"Why were you scared by me?"

-"Because you seemed to be stronger than me."

-"If a woman avoided every man who was stronger than her, wouldn't you say that she had a fear of men?"

-"Yes"

-"So, what's the difference?"

-"I have a friend who is dominated by a strong woman."

-"Doesn't she treat him well?"

-"I just know that I couldn't have taken such a treatment.

-"And you think every strong woman would have treated you the same way that she's treating your friend?"

-"No"

-"So?"

-"I'm fragile. If someone dominates me, I'll break. I can't bend, I'm just torn to pieces."

-"I know.", she said and slightly turned towards me.

-"You know?"

-"Yes, and if your friend's girlfriend is a truly strong woman, so would she have, if it was you she was with. A real woman would always see the man she loves as he is. She would know him better than he knows himself."

There was a silence. I no longer feared her, but the confusion remained.

-"What do you want from me?"

-"Let me remove your fear."

-"How?"

She smiled, and returned to her gazing at the water.

-"Take a wild guess."

-"That we get together?"

-"Yes"

-"Ok", I said to surrender. Nothing really mattered, but to remain the feeling of safety.

She turned towards me.

-"Come", she said and reached out her arm towards me.

I came closer, and she placed me in front of her with her arms around my waist.

-"Now, I want you to do me a favour."

-"What?"

-"I want you to show to me that the water isn't dangerous.", she said and loosened her hold.

I went to the edge of the lake and took of my clothes. I felt her eyes on my back as I removed my last piece of clothing. With no hesitation, I walked into the water that held a comfortable temperature, and started to swim outwards. After a couple of minutes, I turned around and swam back. I walked on land and saw her coming slowly towards me.

-"Was that ok?"

She didn't answer, but started to take of her clothes, and I sat down on a stone to wait for the sun to dry me up. Short after she stood butt naked before me and displayed a beautiful body. I felt dizziness, and realised that everything that had happened was really starting to wear me out.

-"Come"

She took my arm, and together we walked into the water. When the water reached our knees, she stopped and whispered into my ear:

-"No fear"

Then, in a sudden move, she threw me down in the water and placed herself on top while holding my head above the surface. The water reached my cheeks, and she only had to lower my head a couple of inches to drown me.

-"Please-", I whispered.

My body trembled uncontrollably as she bowed down and kissed my lips.

-"See your fear as your friend. If you hadn't been so afraid, your head would have been under the water now.", she said in a low voice before she kissed my neck and let her hand move down towards my crotch.

I had an erection before she got there, and felt her hand around my sensible part before she suddenly enveloped me and sent shock waves through my body. Her hand under my neck lifted my head up towards her breast, and as my lips obediently closed around her nipple, all my fear was gone. I sucked on her breast as a little child while she fucked me gently, giving me a pleasure that spread out in my entire body and eliminated every thought I had in my mind. I was in one with her, and she had the right to do whatever she wanted with me.

She continued to move her hips slowly until we both came simultaneously. Her motion was intensified the last seconds, and I almost experienced a black out as my body emptied out every last drop of remaining fortitude.

Afterwards she wrapped both arms around me and just held me tightly towards her for a few minutes. I felt her heart pounding towards my chest and knew that if she had let me go, I would have drowned. There wasn't a single shred of force left in me.

-"Are you broken?", she then asked, half-whispering into my ear.

-"No"

I opened my eyes.

-"But I will be if you ever leave me."

She lifted her head up and looked at me.

-"Really broken?"

I nodded.

-"Yes"

-"Good. I wouldn't want to remove all fear in you."

-"I love you."

-"I know. That was the intent.", she said and gave me a big smile before she lifted me up and carried me on land. "Let's go home and do this properly."