Annie's Body's Ample

or Brad's Lament I


(sung to the tune of the Battle Hymn of the Republic, or John Brown's Body)

My name is Brad and I'm so glad, my sister's gone today.
She's just fourteen, a Muscle Queen, who really likes to play.
She gets pumped up and beats me up, believe me when I say,
She'll beat me up again!

My sister, Little Annie Ample,
My sister, Little Annie Ample,
My sister, Little Annie Ample,
Will beat me up again!

My back is cracked; my ribs are broke; my body's black and blue.
The doctors always ask me, "Boy, who did all this to you?"
I'd really like to tell them, but I know that if I do,
She'll beat me up again!

My sister, Little Annie Ample,
My sister, Little Annie Ample,
My sister, Little Annie Ample,
Will beat me up again!

Her pecs are slabs of granite, and her abs are plates of steel.
Her biceps and her triceps are so huge they are unreal.
But, when she's feeling playful, only agony I'll feel.
She'll beat me up again!

My sister, Little Annie Ample,
My sister, Little Annie Ample,
My sister, Little Annie Ample,
Will beat me up again!

So, now you know my tale of woe about that super lass,
The biggest and the strongest, with amazing muscle mass.
I think I hear my sister dear.  She's come to kick my ass!
She'll beat me up again!

My sister, Little Annie Ample,
My sister, Little Annie Ample,
My sister, Little Annie Ample,
Will beat me up again!