Brandy
By anonymous
Best friend's wife uses martial arts to get her point across.


Dan was one of my best friends throughout high school and college after which
we went our separate ways seeking our way in the world. It was about ten years
later that I learned I would be transferred to an office close to where Dan
now made his home. I got moved in to my apartment and made contact with Dan
and met his wife Brandy for the first time.

She was absolutely gorgeous, about five foot six and a slender frame except
for those huge breasts of hers which I estimated to be at least a 'D' cup, if
not 'DD'. She had long dark hair and green eyes with an olive complexion and
sexy walk. Things got off to a chilly start with us as I couldn't stop ogling
her body when I first met her, she looked like a model that had just stepped
off the runway. Some people find me humorous with quick little quips and
comments, but Brandy definitely did not. I would get into 'riffing' with Dan
and we would start laughing and I would always seem to cross some line with
her.

She would say stuff like, "Eww, that's gross ... it isn't funny!" or, "That's
so dumb!"

To which I would reply, "It depends on who you ask," while cracking up with
Dan nervously laughing.

What I didn't know is that I was really starting to annoy Brandy and it
started to show every time I came over. It came to a head one night when I was
over and we were having a few drinks in Dan's backyard. Naturally Brandy came
out and started bitching Dan out about a bunch of chores and crap he needed to
get to. I made some comment about domestic slavery looking for a laugh and
Brandy started to bitch me out as well.

"While we're talking about it Dave, I'm just about tired of your bullshit
whenever you come over and I really don't like you too much anyway as I'm
pretty sure you already know!"

"Wow, bummer for you that you married my best friend!," I laughed. "I was here
first!," I continued chuckling.

She just clenched her fists at her sides and spun around in a huff, storming
back into the house.

"Hey dude, maybe we better quit for tonight and pick this up next week," my
buddy said in a cautious tone.

"Sure thing man, I'll catch up to you later," I said getting up.

He rose with me and stopped me, "Hey, it's really not a good idea to piss
Brandy off, she's got a bit of a temper."

"Yeah, what's she gonna do, bitch at me again?," I laughed.

"Um ... no, if you get her mad enough, she'll more than likely kick your ass,"
he said coolly.

"Yeah, how's she gonna do that, I'm a half a foot taller, bigger and stronger
than she is and I'm a man, I'm not worried," I said smugly.

"What you don't know is that Brandy studies Martial Arts and she's now a 4th
degree Black Belt in Karate, she'll beat your ass in a fight easily, believe
me!" he cautioned.

"Ah, that's a bunch of crap, all that means she's just gonna try and kick me
in the balls or something!," I said shrugged off his warning with a laugh. I
really didn't believe for an instant that Dan's hot little slender wife was
any kind of threat to me.

He threw his arms back and shook his head, "Okay man, I tried to warn you!,"
he laughed.

"Relax, your little girlie wife isn't going to do anything to me!," I shrugged
off the notion that she was anything formidable.

"I don't care what you think buddy, but you don't want to fight her," he
cautioned again and let me out the gate.

The next few days, Dan came over to my place and we hung out there for the
most part. The trouble started when we went back to hanging at Dan's place.
Just like every other time I started getting boisterous again, except this
time, Brandi came out of the house and into the back yard in what looked like
stretchy black biking shorts that really showed off her hot, slender body and
a matching top struggling to contain her oversized breasts. I was surprised
that her stomach was cut up into a hard looking six pack, and her arms and
legs showed great definition.

It was like she came out there ready to be offended at the slightest
indication that I was acting up again and being a stupid smart ass. I forgot
exactly what was said, but the exchange really pissed Brandy off.

"That's it Dave! Get up!," she shouted.

"Brandy, honey ... please ... ," he was cut short by Brandy.

"I told you what I was going to do to this idiot the next time he came over
and started being an asshole, now I'm going to beat his ass!," she shifted her
attention to me.

"I told you to get up and face me Dave!," she shouted again as she pulled off
her pink Nike tennis shoes getting ready to fight.

"I'm not fighting any woman, you're ridiculous, I'd kill you!," I said
laughing.

Hearing that Brandy walked right up to me and slapped me hard in the face. It
stung and I started to see red.

"Yeah, c'mon then, if you're so sure, how about it tough guy, are all those
muscles for show or what?," she said backing off and assuming some kind of
Karate stance with her hands extended.

"Brandy!," inserted Dan. "Please, don't!," again he implored.

I was still stinging from that slap and was in no mood to hear any of this
crap.

"I'm leaving," I started getting up as I put my hand to my face where Brandy
slapped me. I stared at her and said, "If you ever do that again ... ," I was
cut off with another open hand slap to the other side of my face.

"You'll do what?!?," Brandy was almost screaming, dancing around. "C'mon Dave,
this has been a long time coming, put 'em up!"

I reached out to slap her back but she just ducked back out of range but she
did grab my hand out of the air to hang on to as she rocked back on her left
leg and slammed her right foot into my head yelling 'Aiyaa!'. I swear my field
of vision went completely red and I staggered back with the force of her blow.
I had no time to recover as I felt Brandy kick me on other side of my head and
sent me flying backward crashing into some lawn furniture. I now knew I was in
trouble and Brandy wasn't playing. The ringing in my ears slowly subsided and
I started to make out Dan's voice. He got to me first and waved Brandy off,
good thing because I got the impression she was coming to finish me off!

"You've proven your point honey, that's enough, you don't to hurt him
anymore!," Dan begged.

I was still staggering a bit as I was being ushered out the gate by Dan. He
was saying something, but it didn't register as I was still a bit loopy. He
helped me into his car and he started driving me home.

"I told you man, you don't want to fight Brandy! ... I've seen her kick the
shit out of men twice her size with no problem, she's no joke with that
Karate!," he lectured.

I silently agreed, based how easily she handled me, if Dan hadn't been there
to save me, she would have no doubt overwhelmed me. She was very quick and
very powerful as I learned. I wouldn't underestimate her again.

Dan dropped me off and said it would probably be better if we hung out over
here for a while He didn't think Brandy would like to see me around for a
while. I agreed and went in to lay down and take an aspirin.

A couple days passed and I got home one Friday night just as the weather was
turning nasty. It had started to rain as day turned into night. I walked up to
the front door of my place and found that it was slightly ajar.

I cautiously crept in looking for anybody who might still be here. I was
trying to figure out if I had been robbed or not when the lights suddenly came
on. I saw Brandy sitting on my couch by the lamp in a trench coat.

"I hope you don't mind that I let myself in," she purred grinning from ear to
ear.

"What the hell are you doing here, where's Dan?," I asked hastily.

She laughed a bit and said, "Dan had to go off on a little trip and won't be
back for a couple of days, so I thought this would be the ideal time for us to
finish our little 'discussion' we were having. You know, the one where you
said you'd 'kill me in a fight' ... ," she said mocking my tone.

I started to get nervous and said, "Look, I don't want any trouble here so you
should just ... ," I got cut short.

"I'll bet you don't, not after I gave you a little taste of what I can do to
you!," she chuckled and continued mocking me, "I believe you said I was just
going to try and kick you in the balls, is that right? Well, I guess you found
out that I don't need to kick a man in the balls, I'd much rather snap kick
your head off instead!," she finished in a serious tone.

She was walking slowly towards me barefooted still in her trench coat as I
backed away. She untied the belt and dropped the coat off her shoulders. She
was wearing the same black lycra shorts and top she was wearing the night she
almost took my head off with her kicks, except this time her little hands were
taped up and she clenched them into little fists and sunk into a Karate
stance.

"Now, where were we ... oh yeah," and faster than I could follow she advanced
on me again and hit me with a hard open hand slap that echoed in my head and
stung so bad my eyes started watering. I rocked back with the force of the
blow and immediately, she was on me again. I knew if I started getting kicked
in the head again, I would be in serious trouble like last time ... so I
scampered backward trying to evade her attack. At the same time I tried to
generate some offense and took a couple of stiff jabs at her face as she
pressed her advantage.

Brandy stayed out of range and saw my last jab coming, she easily slipped my
punch and then sent me right back down to the floor with a perfectly placed
kick right across my nose with a loud "Aiyaa!" I hit the ground hard clutching
my nose and screaming in pain. My eyes were tearing up fiercely and it was
hard to see.

"Still think Karate is bunch of bullshit?!? I knew I'd really get off on
beating you up you pompous ass!," she spit. I had started to get back up and
noticed that blood had started freely flowing from my nose, it hurt bad and I
was having trouble breathing.

"What's the matter sweetie, did the 'little girlie' break your nose?!?," she
mocked me again. "My, my, look at all that blood," she said in mock concern
while practically laughing. I was in trouble again ... I could barely see
through all the water in my eyes and my nose felt like someone had hit me in
the face with a brick, worst of all ... it didn't appear that Brandy was done
with me yet. I took my feet and instantly noticed that my legs were still a
bit wobbly from getting kicked in the face.

I still had something left in the tank, she hadn't totally beaten me down yet
so I focused and vowed that I wouldn't go down without giving her some kind of
fight. I was angry, hurt and frustrated that this little girl was dominating
me but I had to keep my head if I gonna get out of this. I put my arms up and
decided that I would try some set up jabs and maybe catch her with an outside
right or send one over the top and see if I could connect.

Brandy saw me put my dukes up and her grin got big and evil. She just walked
up in front of me almost daring me to try and hit her. I saw what I thought
was an opening and sent a short crisp jab towards her chin. Her arm came out
of nowhere and blocked my jab sending it wide of the mark. My other hand
followed immediately with the same result, but this time, Brandy counter
punched with two solid fists in the gut and one across the face. I went flying
backwards again and landed on my ass. I sprung back up and came around for a
big right which she ducked, then gave me two more powerful strikes to the
body. My gut was on fire as I groaned and doubled over clutching my mid
section and scampering backward. Brandy pressed her attack and hit me another
devastating kick straight to the head with another "Aiyaa!". I went flying
backwards over the couch knocking down tables and anything else along the way.

I felt everything spinning and I couldn't figure out where I was right away. I
rolled over and pushed myself up onto all fours and shook my head a little
trying to get the dizziness to subside. I was spewing blood with every breath
out of my mouth, I couldn't breath at all through my nose and it was almost
impossible for me to stand. The room was quiet except for my labored breathing
and groaning through the pain I was in. The cobwebs cleared enough to see
Brandy sitting back in the same chair she had been with her trench coat back
on smiling wide with her legs demurely crossed.

"I hope that clears things up for you Davie boy!," she smiled. I groaned again
and coughed a bit. Brandy got up and walked over to where I was still trying
to stagger to my feet.

"That was just a sample big man, if I have to come over here again for another
'discussion'," ... she trailed off. She bent down to whisper in my ear, "I'll
put you in a fucking hospital, understand!"

She walked over to the door and as she was closing it, she said, "I don't need
to hear anything about this little incident, so I wouldn't tell Dan or the
cops if I were you ... not that you'd let anybody know a girl beat you up this
badly."

I heard the door close and again, all was quiet. I finally got the energy to
stand and managed to push the couch back upright so I could lay down. I slept
into Saturday morning and woke up with a throbbing headache and pain running
throughout my whole body. I went to the bathroom to take a piss and passed by
the mirror. I looked like I had been in a car accident and wondered what I was
going to say to people when they asked me what happened.

I ended up taking off for week and hanging out with friends in another state.
I told everybody I had been jumped and mugged while walking through the park
one night which they believed. It certainly looked as if some thugs had beat
my face in, so it was an easy sell.

I thought about it for a while and I couldn't come to grips with the looming
threat of Brandy coming over to my place again and beating the snot out of me
whenever she wanted to, so I applied for and got a transfer from my job to
another office in another state. I moved out of my apartment and packed all my
shit up and swung by Dan's to say goodbye to my best friend.

Dan was bummed out, but Brandy was all smiles. I shook his hand and told him
I'd be in touch. Brandy gave me a hug goodbye, as she did I heard her whisper,
" ... wise decision!"

-fin-