Barefooted babe, bloodied badguy By Jack Jessica always goes barefoot, especially when beating up badguys! OOF! My bare sole collided with his jaw, sending teeth flying. He landed on the ground, crying like a madman. I wriggled my toes. It felt good. Here was a serial rapist, 6'3", 220 lbs., and he was getting the shit kicked out of him by a 35-year-old barefooting ballerina. Who was still extremely hot, I might add. "What's the matter," I grinned "you don't find my feet attractive?" "You kicked out my front teeth, bitch!" I couldn't stop grinning. This guy had raped at least 25 women. Now he was getting the pain. "Yeah. A big tough bad-ass like you can't handle one tiny little woman like me." Kristin had told me this guy hated women with a passion. That was the key ... keep pushing his buttons so he'd keep attacking me. And I'd keep giving him foot skin on jaw! "You little bitch!" He managed to get himself to standing. "I'll kill you even if it's the last thing I do!" I shook my head. This serial rapist wasn't scary at all! "The last thing you're gonna do is die in prison. And every day until then, you're gonna have nightmares about that cute little ballet lady whose tough bare feet kicked you to pieces." With that, I shot one foot into his right kneecap. He went down to console it. I shot another into the other knee. With that, he couldn't stand! He cried as he fell to his knees, then cried out again for landing on his knees. His eyes looked up at me, pleading. But all he saw was my confident cocksure grin, and he knew that the pain wasn't going to be ending anytime soon. Let me tell you about myself. For a woman who is systematically dismantling a man twice her size, you might be surprised to know that I had never been in a fight before two months ago. I'd just been fired from my ballet company, because they thought a 35-year-old woman was past her prime ... never mind the fact that I'm in perfect shape and men do happen to throw themselves at me. I went out for a barefoot walk to clear my head. Oh, yeah, about the whole barefoot thing. Well, being a dancer, of course my dancer's feet are the most important part of my body. But not just that, I long ago made a deal with my feet that I would never restrict them in any way if I didn't have to. Just call me a barefoot addict, I have been since I was a little girl. I always knew barefoot was a great way to be artisitic, but I have just recently found out that my bare feet can be instruments of justice! Well, as I was walking around, two thugs tried to mug me. Instinct took over, and my 33 years of dance training led my feet to kick those two thugs so hard and so fast that they turned around and ran in terror. Fat, out-of-shape, I ran them down in no time and proceeded to barefootedly pulverize them until they were bawling their eyes out and begging for mercy. It felt great. It was the first time I'd ever thrown a punch, let alone beaten a badguy into the hospital. Well, the story got some news, and the next thing I knew, two women were at my door asking me to join them. One of them was the model Kristin Johnson, whom I'd always admired for her outspokenly barefooted lifestyle. Well, these two women were both barefooters and both incredible fighters, and they'd decided to fight the badguys of the world under the name Barefoot Justice. And after reading about me in the papers, they wanted me to join. I was recently out of a job, so I thought, why not? Kristin has been training me in several martial arts styles, and I love it. Over the past few weeks, I've beaten up school bullies, Klansmen, bank robbers, any villain we can get our hands on. And it feels great. Most badguys think they're above the world, and definitely above women. It's great to see them first try to hit on us, then laugh as we say we're about to bring them to justice, then worry as they start losing the fight to us, and finally grovel in terror as we beat them shitless! My latest victim was on his knees, his mouth a bloody mess with no front teeth still intact. He started bawling. God, I loved this part. "Oh, God no ... I'll do anything! I'll confess to every crime I've ever committed! Just don't beat me up anymore! Pleeeeease!" I shook my head. These guys never learn. One well-trained and barefooted woman on the side of good will defeat villainy every time. And mercy is not my strong suit when it comes to rapists. "That nose of yours. It's not broken yet. I've got to fix that." "No, God. Please!" His hands flew up to his nose to protect it. Sucker, I thought. Surely a rapist realizes the one place I'm going to have to put into pain. As his hands flew up to his face, his crotch was now totally exposed. Here goes. WHACK! Cute, pedicured, calloused dancer's foot lands right in the groin of serial rapist. Serial rapist howls in pain. His hands shoot down to his groin to comfort it. Leaving that nose wide open. Here goes. CRACK! Cute, pedicured, calloused dancer's foot heel slams into nose of serial rapist. It explodes in a geyser of blood and cartilage. He lies on ground, a bloody mess and unconscious. "Hello, Kristin, it's me Jessica." I spoke into my cell phone. "Jessica, how'd it go?" "Are you kidding" I asked. "I don't think this guy even knew how to fight! Two black eyes, demolished nose, no front teeth, busted lips, and he won't be wanting to have sex anytime soon." "Way to go, Jessica. The police have been looking for this guy for awhile. I'll call the police in your area and they'll come pick him up in an ambulance." "Damn right," I nodded, looking down at one of the worst sleazeballs in the country, as he looked so peaceful and bloody. "Rack another one up for Barefoot Justice" The ladies of Barefoot Justice will continue using bare feet and estrogen to demolish evil, or at least beat into a state of whimpery begging. Barefoot chicks rule!