BRITNEY SPEARS VS. MIKE TYSON by BC242 (email bc242@hotmail.com) Sexy Young Superstar Taunts, Challenges and Fights Former Heavyweight Champ Note: Britney Spears and Mike Tyson are both real people, whose careers as well as their antics in their private lives have been well-documented and are part of the public record. This story uses some of this factual information. However, this story is set in the future, and events described are fantasy and have not, at least at the time of this writing, actually occurred. Readers should approach this story as if it were several months into the future, but it must be noted that this story was written contemporaneously in 2004. The story also assumes that Britney has had a lifelong disdain for Tyson, which is only an assumption, but hardly an implausible one, considering that this disdain is shared by many people. BRITNEY SPEARS VS. MIKE TYSON BY BC242 Britney Spears looked radiant as she entered the casino at the Las Vegas hotel where she was in the middle of a week-long series of sold-out performances. As usual, the paparazzi were there, but also many "regular people", on vacation in Vegas, who squealed in surprised delight at being in the presence of a major celebrity. Of course, this was nothing new for Britney. She had been in the spotlight since her teens, and now, at age 22, she was more popular than ever. Suddenly, there was a bit of excited noise that came from the other end of the casino. The professional photographers ran towards the commotion. The first to get there called to the others: "Hey, it's Mike Tyson!" Britney kept a frozen smile on her face, but inside she seethed. Brittney HATED Mike Tyson, and always had. Tyson was the first heavyweight boxing champion that Britney ever knew of. She was 5 years old in 1986 when Iron Mike Tyson, the undefeated brawler from Brooklyn via the State Penitentiary, became the champ. Two years later, Britney saw Tyson's soon to be ex-wife tearfully talking about Tyson slapping her around, as well as drooling on her as he slept in her arms. A wave of anger came over 7 year-old Britney. "I wish I could beat him up!" she thought to herself repeatedly as she watched the scandal unfold on TV for the next few months. But along with her anger, Britney also laughed at Tyson. He may have been 15 years older than Britney, but he drooled like a baby! So from that age, the anger and the disrespect she felt for him went hand in hand. In 1991, Britney's feelings of contempt for Tyson were confirmed, when he was convicted of rape. Britney was then almost 10, and though she was thrilled when he was found guilty and had to go to prison, she felt a new surge of anger at him when he showed off his handcuffs, which were in front of him, to the TV cameras as he left the courtroom for jail, as if the rape and everything else was a joke. Again, she wished that she could beat him up, but in reality, it of course couldn't happen. Britney and her retinue made their way towards the hotel's theatre, where she was performing that week. Her path led her to Tyson and his group. Apparently, from what she could gather, and then read later, Tyson had just held a news conference at the Hotel, which had a full-sized, world-class sports arena in addition to the theatre and the casino. A new phony "Boxing Association" had just formed, and despite Tyson's recent loss in the ring, had declared him to be "Heavyweight Champion of the World". In the unregulated domain of boxing, there are often multiple champions these days. As Britney approached Tyson and his "gofers", she almost laughed at the silver plated belt that he was wearing, a gift from the same Association that had just bestowed the "Heavyweight Championship" on him. The smile never left her face, but all of her past despising of the man who she was now seeing for the first time in person grew into a silent rage. But this time, there was a difference. This time, as she glared at Tyson and sized him up, an epiphany came over Britney. She could take Tyson! She could challenge him to a fight, and win! No longer was this the impetuous anger of a 7 or a 10 year-old child. Britney was now a wealthy and famous superstar. Her dance routines kept her in top athletic shape, while Tyson looked flabbier than she had expected. She could tell from his slow reactions to people talking to him, and his own recognition of her was proof that her reflexes were much faster than his. He might have been bright once, but he had done a lot of stupid things, and had taken too many punches to his head. So, Britney figured, she was probably smarter than he was! And although the stats show Tyson to be 5'11", up close, he looked to be no more than 5'9" the most! Maybe Mike's people had exaggerated, or maybe gravity had caught up to him and he was starting to shrink. Either way, Britney could see that in her high heels, she looked taller than Tyson! The bottom line, Britney felt, was that she was at the top of her game while Tyson was a has-been who was almost washed up. As Britney's group passed Tyson's on the way to the theatre, a plan formulated in her mind. She kept that frozen smile on her face, but her brain was working at overdrive. "Let them think that I'm just a blonde airhead!" Britney thought to herself, as she often did. She knew better than that. There are lots of teenaged blonde airheads, but she was Britney Spears! SHE was the girl of her generation to have enormous success, as opposed to the REAL airheads. And she was smart enough to keep her career going, far longer than many other teen stars in the past. So she kept up her "dumb blonde" image, while using it to help her to continue to climb the ladder of show-business success. And not only was Britney rich and famous, but she was smart enough to realize how powerful she was. She was a hot commodity and knew it. She could make demands of her promoters, including the hotel that she was working at this week, and get whatever she wanted. She got her shows choreographed the way SHE wanted them, sang the music that SHE wanted, both on stage and in the studio, and in general could always get her way, because everyone connected with Britney knew that their jobs could be eliminated at her slightest whim. All of this had given Britney supreme self-confidence. She was happy to portray the image of a Louisiana bimbo, but her previous year, in which she lived in and was based out of New York City, had made her anything but that. New York, she realized, was the last piece of the puzzle. Living there gave her the toughness, the brazenness and the savvy that complimented the success and celebrity that she had already attained. She realized, when she was looking at Tyson, that she wasn't the least bit afraid of him physically. She knew that she could beat him in a fight. She knew that she could play with his mind. She knew that she could end his boxing career for good. And she knew that if she played her cards right, she could make it happen. She had the power to make it happen. She just had to figure out how to make this come about. The opportunity presented itself that evening. Towards the end of her show, Britney noticed a group of people talking to each other at a table. It was Tyson and his cronies! She had the spotlight turned on the table. "Ladies and gentlemen, apparently we have a special guest in the audience - the former heavyweight champion of the world, Mike Tyson!" The introduction took Tyson by surprise, and he unsteadily got up and waved as he was greeted by a mixed chorus of cheers and boos. Britney motioned for Tyson to approach the stage, and had the stage manager give him a microphone. He stopped at the bottom of the stage, a spotlight still on him, and another one on Britney. "Well, Mikey," purred Britney, "You were once a champ, but now you're a CHUMP!" A chorus of "OOOOOOOOOOH" came from the crowd in response to Britney's audacious comment. Tyson, who had been smiling, suddenly had hate in his eyes and was unsteady on his feet. "I-I'm still the champ!" he said in his trademark high-pitched voice. Britney laughed. "You mean that bullshit organization that was just set up so that they can make you champ?" More hoots and hollers came from the crowd. "I'll tell you what, Mikey," said Britney, now seizing the offensive. "Even though that "championship belt" that I saw you with is a phony, I think that it would look better on ME!" The crowd started to murmur. Did Britney mean what she seemed to mean? What she said next confirmed that she did. "Mike Tyson, I challenge you to a fight for that 'championship' that you claim that you had. A 10 round fight!" Cheers went up from the crowd, which anxiously looked at Tyson for his reaction. "I-I'm not going to fight you, b-bitch!" stammered Tyson. "I beat up real men!" Britney looked at Tyson with a mocking smile, then said to the crowd, "I think we're seeing a new meaning for the term 'Tyson's Chicken!'" she said in her Louisiana drawl. Her joke might have been corny, but her fans loved it, and cheered her on. "And not only that, Mikey, but I year you're in a load of debt! You beat me, and you'll have lots of money to pay off your debts, and plenty more!" Tyson looked at Brittney. "H-How much money?" he asked, before realizing his blunder. Brittney had trapped Tyson! In just a few seconds she had challenged him and baited him. Now, suddenly, it wasn't a question of IF there would be a fight. Tyson's question to Britney hand answered that. Now all that needed to be settled was the terms of the fight. "Tell you what, Chump!" said Britney, maintaining the offensive. "Let's make the stakes REAL. Winner take all. That means the entire purse, all the pay-per-view money, and everything else. As the crowd buzzed with excitement, Brittney continued. "But let's make it more than that, Mikey. Whoever loses the fight belongs to the winner!" Tyson looked puzzled. W-What do you mean? he asked, his already high voice trembling. Britney took a couple of steps towards the front of the stage and looked down at Tyson, the spotlights still on both of them. "What I, mean, chump, is that whoever loses has to give up their career, and their personal lives, to the other. It means that if you win, I'll be your 'bitch', your 'ho', your plaything to do anything you want to me. If you want, you can make me put on shows, and you get all of the money. "But if I win," continued Britney, you become MY 'bitch'! MY 'ho'! MY plaything to do whatever I want to YOU! And even if I end your boxing career, I'm sure that I can find other ways for you to make money for me!" More cheers from the audience as Tyson nervously looked around, not knowing what to do. Maintaining the offensive, Britney continued. "It'll be SOOOOOOO much fun to kick you around the ring for 10 rounds!" Anger welled up in Tyson's throat. He wasn't used to anyone talking to him like that, especially a young blonde girl like Britney. "W-What kicking?" he asked. "I'm a boxer, not a kicker!" Again, Britney had manipulated Tyson into saying exactly what she wanted him to say. "Ok, Chump you're afraid of my kicking legs?" she asked. "Well, this is what we'll do: "We'll box like in a regular boxing match. BUT- if you start using your feet and legs, then I get to use mine, and we'll start kickboxing!" Tyson looked befuddled. Why would she want that? It seemed to favor him. All he had to do was to keep himself from kicking Britney, and she wouldn't be able to kick him. Not that he should be afraid of that, but in any case he shrugged in silent agreement to the terms. "Ok, then it's settled!" Britney declared. "The fight will take place in the arena of this very hotel, 4 weeks from this Saturday night!" The theatre exploded with cheers. There was nothing Tyson could do. He couldn't back out, and besides, he wouldn't have any problem with this cracker girl. She had a big mouth, but she was a singer and dancer, not a fighter. "My lawyers will work out all the arrangements with your lawyers and the hotel!" announced Britney. See ya then, Chump!" There was so much excitement and confusion that the show ended at that point. No point in doing their final dance routine. What the audience had just witnessed was a grand finale that nothing could top. By the following morning, word had spread all over the world of Britney's challenge, and Tyson's apparent acceptance. And by the end of the day, both Britney Spears and Mike Tyson had made the deal with the hotel, agreeing to all the terms that Britney had dictated from the stage the previous evening. Britney knew that she had the power to call the shots. If the hotel, or the satellite transmission people, or for that matter the City of Las Vegas or the State of Nevada didn't accede to every demand she made, or piss her off in any way, she could move her challenge of Tyson to another venue and other vendors with no problem. So Britney got all the terms she wanted put into the fight agreement. Although the tabloid and other media had a field day with this story, few gave Britney a chance of actually defeating Tyson in a fight. Sportscasters and sports radio talk show hosts dismissed any chance of her actually winning to be absurd. Las Vegas sportsbooks made Britney a 1000-1 underdog. Britney had her people make a series of small bets anonymously, so it wouldn't attract attention. She bet a total of $100,000 on herself. As if Britney needed any more of an incentive to win, she now had one. At those odds, in addition to her other winnings, Britney would take home an additional one hundred million dollars! Britney cancelled her regular entertainment tour and for the next month, she trained in a secret location. She did weight training and took boxing and kickboxing lessons, sparring with pros in both. The pros were sworn to secrecy, which was made easier by the large amounts of cash given to them to remain silent - and also by the embarrassment it would have caused them to talk about it. By the end of the month, Britney, the ultimate consummate professional in ways that she never had gotten much credit for, had done significant damage to the pros with which she had trained. In addition to sparring with live opponents, Britney commissioned a life-sized dummy of Tyson! She had it made to the height of 5'9", because having seen him up close, she knew that this had to be closer to his alleged height of 2 inches taller. Britney had the "Tyson Doll" dressed the way he would be at the match, with his sneakers, boxing gloves, and trunks covering his athletic supporter and protective cup. Britney made sure that the dummy was made with dense but semi-soft material, so that she could practice boxing on it in a more realistic manner. She especially enjoyed slamming the tattoo! But an epiphany came to her when she started practicing her kicking. She had knocked the dummy onto its stomach, and was practicing kicking his ass, when she realized - if she was able to get him in this position while in the ring, she would be able to get to his balls, and the protective cup wouldn't be able to protect him! Tyson, for his part, did some sparring, but when he was spotted over the following month he was doing more partying than anything else. He didn't look worried, and in fact he wasn't too worried - she might be a smart-mouthed bitch, but he was a fighter, and Britney was a singer. The only thing that bothered him a little was Britney's apparent supreme self-confidence, but he couldn't see how she could stand a realistic chance with her. And he didn't practice kickboxing at all, since he was in total control of that - Britney couldn't kick unless Tyson kicked first, and Tyson simply would not kick, so he felt that there was nothing to worry about. Despite the fact that few doubted the outcome, the Pay-Per-View orders shattered all previous records. The arena was sold out minutes after the tickets went on sale. Whoever won this fight would be guaranteed at least half a billion dollars! Excitement built with increasing intensity as the final days to the fight approached. Most of the talk in the press centered around how foolish Britney was to have challenged Tyson, and how quickly it would take Tyson to beat her. A weekly tabloid had the headline "Britney's Brainless Blunder" splashed over covers in supermarkets everywhere. No one dared predict that Britney would last even until the end of the first round. Legal experts were interviewed on 24 hour news channels, confirming incredulously that the terms that Britney had insisted on were binding on the loser. On the day before the fight, the "weigh-in" was held. This was the first time that Britney and Tyson had seen each other since the confrontation in the theatre. Britney wore a white terry cloth robe, belted in the front and offering a slight peek of her firm breasts, which were otherwise covered by the robe down to her solid calves. The firm, athletic calves were the only exposed part of her body, before they were tucked into a pair of white socks, encased in white leather sneakers. Tyson, for his part, was wearing only a pair of boxing trunks, with a roll of flab drooping over the top of them, as well as his sneakers and socks. He looked hung-over from partying the night before. He seemed confident, and sneered as he and Britney made their way to the podium from different directions, each with their retinue, as well as a full compliment of security guards between the two camps. Britney and Tyson approached the microphone, along with the promoters and the "commissioner" of the phony new boxing association. Tyson tried to stare Britney down, but she kept her stare locked on his. Few people saw it, but Britney noticed a slight flinch of nervousness in Tyson's eyes Britney quickly stuck her tongue out at Tyson, and returned to her smiling stare. This infuriated Tyson, and broke his stare. Britney chuckled She was already winning the fight!. "We will now have the weigh in!" announced the commissioner. "First, the challenger, Britney Spears!" Apparently there were fans mixed in with the media, since youthful cheers and screams erupted from the room as Britney strode towards the scale. She smiled brilliantly and bowed, allowing an extremely brief peek at her cleavage. She stepped on to the scale, still wearing her robe. The commissioner conferred with other judges. They looked confused, and asked Britney to remove her robe. Britney refused. And they knew that Britney was the hottest commodity, and that she was calling all the shots. After further conferring, another scale was brought in the room. "After double-checking with a second scale," the commissioner announced with puzzlement, "It appears the scales are both correct and Britney Spears weighs in at 150 pounds!" The media and others gasped. Britney is generally listed at 125 lbs, and this was a significant change! Did she so something stupid like gain weight? It didn't look it, but then again Britney's white robe covered all of her body below her neck until the middle of her calves, so people weren't able to tell for sure. But she certainly didn't look unfit! It was Tyson's turn to get weighed. "The champion," the announcer intoned, "Iron Mike Tyson, weighs in at 245 pounds! The knowledgeable sports fans gasped. They realized that Tyson would be fighting at one of the heaviest weights of his career. Tyson stepped back to the podium. "IRON MIKE? HA!" Brittney suddenly exclaimed. She reached over and pinched Tyson's paunch, rolling it in her fingers for a second before letting go. "It feels more to me that he should be called MARSHMALLOW MIKE!" "OOOOOOOOHHHH!" gasped the crowd at Britney's brazen comment. Tyson was trying to exert self-control, but his face contorted in anger. As the crowd quieted down, Britney pointed at the front of Tyson's shorts. "And I bet if you look under there, you would probably call him "MINI MIKE!" "OOOOOOOOHHHH"! went the crowd again, continuing to be what seemed to be calculated provocation. And Tyson was indeed provoked. Britney's last taunt caused him to lunge at her, but six burly security guards quickly blocked him, and calmed him down "That silly tattoo on your eye will be a fun target!" was Britney's parting shot. Britney led her retinue from the podium, effectively ending the event. As she made her way out of the room, she heard one network sports talking-head tell another "That Spears chick shouldn't have pissed of Tyson like that, before the fight even starts!" His colleague laughed in agreement. Britney wore her affected, airhead smile, but inside she was laughing at those two idiots. They didn't realize how clever she was - and that the fight had ALREADY started. It started the night of the challenge that Britney made on stage at the theatre. It had continued for weeks. Britney had been fucking with Tyson's mind from the very beginning. But at the weigh-in, she decided, as a fellow Louisianan of hers would say, "turn it up a notch". With little more than 24 hours until the fight, Britney and her inexplicable brash confidence was psyching him out! "Yes," Britney told herself underneath the frozen smile, "I'm already winning!" Over a billion people were watching as Britney entered the arena and walked towards the ring. She was wearing a pink robe with "Britney Spears" emblazoned in black. Around her neck was a pink feather boa. She was wearing hot pink boxing gloves. Her long blonde hair bounced as she danced towards the ring and climbed in. Lots of cheering female screams, and male ones, too, accompanied her arrival. There were more female "teeny bopper" types than usually attend boxing matches. Britney's assistants removed the feather boa, which was about eight feet long. When they stretched it taut, they saw that, in darker pink lettering, were the words "PROPERTY OF BRITNEY SPEARS". Next, the assistants removed Britney's pink robe. To say that the crowd gasped is an understatement, as they looked at Britney in her hot pink leather bikini bottom and sports bra, which matched the color of her boxing gloves. Now it was obvious why Britney now weighed 25 pounds more than before. It was muscle, not an ounce of fat. Not muscle-bound, but with clearly more muscular arms legs, and even firmer torso than before. She had always made sure to remain athletic, but she was serious about her new exercise and nutritional regimen, and it had worked. Britney was just as shapely and curvy as always. Just more solid than ever. The next thing that the crowd noticed was Britney's footwear. She was wearing high-heeled sneakers! They were made of the same hot pink leather as the rest of her ensemble. They had thick soles, but narrow, tapering, hard rubber heels. Britney shadow-boxed for a few seconds, the pink gloves becoming as much of a blur as were the tassels of her socks. Britney had danced for years in high heels that were much less athletically-friendly than these, and her rendition of the "Ali Shuffle" impressed "The Greatest" himself, who happened to be in the audience. Britney danced around the ring, bouncing gracefully on her heels as effortlessly as if she was wearing regular athletic shoes. And no one was going to question whether the sneakers were legal for the ring, because Britney, as previously noted, was at the top of her showbiz game and therefore called all the shots. Tyson walked in towards his corner of the ring to a smattering of applause, embarrassing for someone who once ruled the boxing world but now was fighting a girl who had been in kindergarten when he first won his heavyweight championship. Most of the crowd felt that despite his fall from the top, and despite the secret wishes of many that Britney would win, Tyson would nevertheless be the victor, and those that bet put their money heavily on him. As Tyson climbed into his corner of the ring, Britney smiled towards him in disdain. His assistants removed his robe. Britney's smile widened when she saw the metal "title belt" on him and she laughed out loud when the belt was removed, and the newly freed fat jiggled around his torso. The referee climbed into the ring, and Britney called him over. He seemed puzzled at what she was saying to him. He said a few words, and Britney could be seen responding angrily, with a threatening look in her eyes. Whatever was being said, the referee was not stupid. He shrugged an "ok" to Britney, who beamed with delight at the outcome of what had just happened. The referee went to an official at ringside. The official was surprised at the request, but went into the locker room to get a tape-measure, returned, and gave it to the referee. The microphone was lowered to the center of the ring. The lights were dimmed in the crowd, with the lights shining on the ring. The crowd got quiet, with some murmuring as the referee did something they had never seen before. He was measuring Britney's height, from head to the sole of her spiked-heel sneakers! The referee then went to the center of the ring and spoke into the microphone. "LADIES AND GENTLEMAN," he announced, "TO MY LEFT, WEIGHING 150 POUNDS, 5 FEET, 9 INCHES, WEARING A PINK BIKINI AND SPORTS BRA, FROM KENTWOOD, LOUISIANA, THE CHALLENGER, BRITNEY SPEARS!" Britney jumped out of her corner, danced around the ring, and then let out a flurry of phantom punches at Tyson. She then stuck out her foot, the sole and the heel pointing at her opponent before she stepped into the center of the ring and bowed to the audience several times, turning to the different directions of the arena, blowing kisses to the crowd through her boxing gloves. The people went wild! Britney nodded at the referee, who nodded back and walked towards Tyson. Suddenly, he knew what was happening and jumped up, trying to resist. But some of his more level-headed handlers restrained him, and the ref got a measurement. "TO MY RIGHT", proclaimed the announcer, "WEIGHING 245 POUNDS AND STANDING FIVE FEET, EIGHT AND A HALF INCHES IN SNEAKERED FEET, WEARING BLUE TRUNKS, FROM BROOKLYN, NEW YORK, THE ASSOCIATION CHAMPION, MIKE TYSON!" Tyson was too angry to even come out of his corner and showboat a little. His cover had been blown. All of his career he had been billed as being 5"11". But there had always been people who had met Tyson and knew their own height, and claimed that Tyson couldn't possibly be that tall. Now, Britney had proven this to the world. Also, Tyson was angry. He always demanded being introduced as "Iron Mike", but Britney made sure that they left out the "Iron" this time. And of course, this thought reminded Tyson of Britney's "Marshmallow Mike" taunt at the weigh-in. Before the first bell rang, Britney had already cluttered Tyson's head with confusion and anger. Smarter than anyone has even given her credit for, Britney congratulated herself on her pre-fight mindfucking of her opponent, but she wanted to see one more ingredient in his eyes that she hadn't seen yet - fear. She had seen uncertainty in his eyes at moments, but never genuine fear. She knew that to achieve that she would have to give him a decisive beating, and make it hurt enough, and humiliating enough, for him to have so much fear of her that he would rather give up than fight him. And she knew that though she had won the preliminary psychological wars, what she needed now was to give him a decisive physical beating. Aides in both corners put mouthpieces into their fighters' mouths, and then the referee called the fighters to the center of the ring. As he read the instructions to them, Tyson again glared at Britney. Britney tried to get as close to Tyson as she matched his glare - embarrassing Tyson even more, since Britney was stood taller than him in her sneakered heels. The fighters went back into their corners, and the bell rang, starting round one. Britney did not tie her hair back in a ponytail, like some thought she would. Instead, she let her long, thick blonde hair flow freely behind her, as she does when performing on stage. As Tyson came towards her, Britney spat out her mouthpiece and flashed a bright, white smile at Tyson, sending the message that she wasn't worried about getting injured, or losing any of her teeth. In anger, Tyson spat out his own mouthpiece and moved towards Britney. Britney took a step towards Tyson and then stopped, putting her hands on her hips and shaking them sexily. Tyson lunged at Britney, throwing a right hook at her smiling face. But Britney was easily able to sway out of the reach of Tyson's swinging arm. Tyson spun around after missing Britney, who stood still, laughing at her opponent. Furious, Tyson pursued Britney around the ring, but she spun away from his attempted punches. His next two hook attempts were futile as she would triple-axle her body away from his fists. Tyson looked bad, missing clumsily as Britney effortlessly danced away from him, her long blonde hair bouncing around her arms and shoulders. Even a boxing expert was now able to see how out of shape Tyson was. Tyson had noticed Britney's moves in reaction to his punches, and figured that it was her strategy to try to wear him out. He decided to trick her by faking a left hook slightly to the right side of Britney's body, but actually lunging further to his right, where he figured that Britney would be after spinning her body to that location. Unfortunately for Tyson, Britney is not as predictable or as dumb as he thought. She had no intention of spinning away for a third time, but figured that Tyson would think that she would. As Tyson lunged, Britney stepped towards him and drove a left uppercut that landed just below his chin. His head snapped up and then back down, where it was met by Britney's right jab, landing on his forehead, right on part of the tattoo that partially surrounds Tyson's left eye. The crowd gasped at Britney's sudden, quick attack. Tyson was stunned, never expecting the audacious girl to attack him so boldly. For most of his life, he never had to worry about anyone punching him back, especially a girl fifteen years his junior. He took a couple of steps back before his head cleared and he realized how foolish he must look, backing away from Britney Spears, of all people, in the first round! Tyson was confused at how to pursue her. He dared not leave himself open the way he had with his earlier hooks, and try to hurt her with his once legendary jabs. He didn't realize it, of course, but Britney had no intention of hitting Tyson again in the first round. At first she continued to dance and spin away from his jabs. But by the end of the round, she was standing right in front of him, smiling mockingly, clearly unafraid, and easily block his blows with her own pink boxing gloves! The crowd buzzed between rounds. The hotel had put up four huge plasma screens in the arena, and they now showed Britney and Tyson, split-screen, in each of their corners. Britney hadn't worked up a sweat. Tyson looked tired - and worried. Tyson's trainer told him not to think of Britney as a bratty girl, but as an ordinary opponent. Just before the start of the 2nd round, Britney spoke to one of her corner people, who signaled to the control booth of the arena, and suddenly the stadium was filled with the loud, pulsing beat of Britney Spears music. The bell rang, and Britney danced to the music, moving to the center of the ring and motioning for Tyson to meet her there. Tyson was a bit disoriented by the music, but started moving towards her, at first with a little confidence. But again, Britney was able to deflect his blows with her fists. Suddenly, Britney unleashed a series of blows to Tyson's face. A left to the nose, a right to the eye, a left underneath the eye, a right to the side of his face. Tyson tried to fight back, but Britney, feigning annoyance, batted his gloved hands away with hers, and continued for another five seconds of rapid-fire punches. She then stood proudly, inches away from Tyson. When he looked up, she stuck her tongue out of her smiling face! This caused more rage in Tyson, but Britney, now in the ring with him for him for almost two rounds, could see his moves coming from a mile away, and she swatted his punches as if they were bothersome flies. The bell rang to end the second round. Tyson still hadn't landed a clean punch. Britney's onslaught lasted only 15 seconds of the 3 minute round, but it seemed much longer than that to the fans, not only because Britney threw so many punches in that time, none of which Tyson could stop, but because Tyson was as ineffective on offense as he was on defense. Britney's smile flashed brilliantly as she watched the scene in Tyson's corner. His trainer and other corner men seemed to be arguing among themselves as to how to handle Britney, who they never imagined would be a problem for "Iron Mike". Tyson looked stunned, and the disagreement among his handlers just confused him even more. Britney decided to add to Tyson's confusion in the 3rd round. As the third round started, a different Britney song came on (which one isn't really important. Her vocals weren't being played anyhow, it was just the beat and the rhythm to which she usually dances). Britney started dancing around the ring, actually leaping around, landing on her high-heeled sneakers and bouncing up, covering nearly half the ring with each jump. Tyson was predictably confused, and Britney took advantage of this with a series of punch combinations. They were usually four to twelve punches at a time, after which she would sexily dance away for a few seconds, then leaping back at Tyson for another punishing combination. Britney noticed, as she continued to easily block Tyson's attempted punches, that his blows were not as hard as they had been earlier in the fight. And then she saw him wince after a punch! Though she wasn't a trained boxer, she could tell that his forearms were weakening. So she decided to abruptly stand in place, her arms and legs in a classic boxing stance, and wait for Tyson to attack. But this time, instead of merely deflecting or Blocking Tyson's blows with her fists, Britney met his punches head-on with punches of her own to Tyson's gloves! She hit his hands back harder, and could sense the pain shooting up through his arms. Britney took advantage of this by starting to concentrate on his upper arms. As his arms moved slower than before, Britney was able to duck and start punching the inside of his arms. By the end of the round, Tyson could barely lift them. In her corner, Britney whispered to an aide, who signaled to the control booth. The rhythm of Britney's music boomed louder as she bounded off of her bench at the start of the 4th round. Tyson moved slowly towards her, but without hesitation, Britney rushed right at him and unleashed a vicious attack all over his face arms and torso. Tyson backed away, but Britney pursued him relentlessly. Both of his eyes were swelling up, as was much of the area that was covered by the tattoo around his left eye. Brittney had made good on her promise to use the tattoo as a target! Tyson shook his head, trying to clear it, and came back at Britney. But he was met with another combination of blinding smashes to his body, arms and head. She was now punching him to the beat of her music, much to the delight of her screaming fans. Britney opened a cut on Tyson's mouth, and more blood was dripping. Despite the onslaught, Tyson managed to remain on his feet, though by the end of the fourth round Britney had Tyson against the ropes and was savagely attacking him, while he was not able to put up any kind of a defense. Britney could see the look of impending doom in Tyson's increasingly swollen eyes. In her childhood fantasies, when she imagined beating up Mike Tyson, there was something specific that she always imagined. Now, she could see that in his weakened and confused physical and emotional state, she could fulfill that fantasy. Between rounds, Britney said something to one of her aides. While her white smile beamed wider than ever, the aid tied one end of a pink ribbon to her left wrist, and the other end to the rear clasp of her sports bra. The crowd's screaming was deafening as they realized Britney's intention. She was - literally - going to fight Tyson with one hand behind her back! This infuriated Tyson, and this is what probably gave him enough strength to make it to the center of the ring. "Remember what Muhammad Ali once said, Mikey?" she asked Tyson in a chiding voice. "When you fight a fat man, hit him in the belly!" And for the first minute of the 5th round, that's exactly what Britney did to Tyson's tummy. She had told him what she was going to do, she had only one hand with which to do it, but despite those apparent disadvantages, Tyson, with both of his arms free, could do nothing to stop Britney from repeatedly ramming her right fist into various parts of his stomach. She started concentrating on his solar plexus, and didn't stop until she heard repeated grunting from Tyson in reaction to her punches. Tyson weakly tried to dive at her with both arms flailing away, and this is when Britney started slamming her right fist, her only free one into other parts of the body, mixing the blows to the belly with ones to his arms, head and torso. Tyson slumped against the ropes, and Britney, with incredible ease and power, batted Tyson's face from one side to the other, first a forehand punch, then a backhand, over and over again, and Tyson could do nothing to stop her. He struggled to put his arms up to protect his face, allowing Britney to finish the round with a blow to his unprotected belly, as well as a final powerful blow to each of his fists, again sending waves of pain up his arm from his wrists to his shoulders. The crowd, and the worldwide audience, wondered if Britney would continue to fight Tyson with one arm behind her back. in the next round. At first, when they saw her aide step up behind her back, they thought that he was going to cut her wrist free from the ribbon. But instead, he tied another ribbon - this one to her right wrist, and brought it up behind her, tying it next to the other knot bound to her bra. The crowd let out a collective gasp, then the Britney fans, Teeny-boppers and all, screamed as they realized Britney's intent was now to fight Tyson with BOTH hands tied behind her back! Britney whispered to her trainer, who shrugged, but passed along the instruction to one of her aides who took out a cigarette, put it in Britney's mouth, and lit it! (another habit she had developed in New York.) Britney casually puffed on the cigarette, flicking the ashes off by snapping her tongue against the filter. Tyson couldn't believe what he was seeing, but he didn't have much time to think before the bell sounded, starting the 6th round. The music that now boomed throughout the arena was the introduction to Pat Benatar's "Hit Me With Your Best Shot". Britney had been thinking of performing and recording this song (maybe she has done so by the time that you are reading this), and she couldn't resist the symbolism of the title of the song in the context of a boxing ring. Besides, she knew that Tyson knew that she was using the song to further taunt him. The mindfucking that she had begun with her challenge to Tyson did not stop with the fight itself. Britney knew the effect that it would have on him. With her cigarette dangling from her lips, Britney came to the center of the ring and stopped. Although her wrists were tied behind her, they were done so in a way that caused her elbows to point out from her sides, as though her hands were on her hips, giving her a look of incongruous brashness, considering that her arms were imprisoned. She started doing some stationary dancing - the kind she does on stage when she's not prancing around. She just stands, usually with dancers all around her, and simply moves first her right hip forward, then the left, not moving from her standing position while letting her hips do most of the work. The anger that welled up inside Tyson gave him what little remaining strength he had. He labored over to Britney and swung his fist at her face, trying to knock the cigarette out of her mouth. Britney easily leaned away from the punch, took a long drag and blew a stream of smoke into Tyson's eyes. Tyson could barely see through his swollen eyes, but now he decided to go after Britney's seemingly unprotected body. He swung his right arm, as hard as he was now able, into Britney's abdomen, as Britney had done to him in the previous round. But while Britney's punches to Tyson's flabby belly weakened and hurt him, Tyson's punches bounced feebly off of Britney's firm, hard abs. Britney responded by blowing a smoke ring, acting bored. The crowd ate it up. They were now almost entirely for Britney, and this got Tyson pissed. He threw both right and lefts into Britney's mid-section, and her only response was to blow another smoke ring for each punch that Tyson threw. Then, Tyson decided, since the rules did not prohibit hitting Britney in the breasts, that they would be his next target. His punches weakly bounced off of her sports bra. She giggled, and then, making sure that it was loud enough for the microphone to pick up, chirped "OOOOHHH THAT TICKLES!", which generated loud hoots from the audience. This caused Tyson more despair, and made his attack even more ineffective. After six punches, it was clear that Tyson was hurting himself, not Britney. His punch attempts became even more ponderous, and the crowd shouted their approval as his heavy arms could no longer stand the force of gravity, and despite his continued attempts to hit Britney's huge orbs, his arms fell weakly to his side. All of a sudden, Tyson, in obvious desperation, tried to head-butt Britney, attempting to slam his forehead into her eye. But Britney could sense what he he was trying to do, and simply bent her upper body, including her tied-up arms, to her left. In this position, Britney's bent right elbow was positioned upright, and Tyson's head slammed into it. Instead of Tyson giving Britney a black eye, he instead slammed a welt under his own eye into her elbow, causing the welt to explode with blood. Tyson's head sagged, right into Britney's range. In a quick move, she straightened upright while pivoting to her right, causing her left shoulder to smash into Tyson's lower right jaw. This time, Tyson couldn't maintain his balance, and crumpled to the floor. There were about two palpable seconds of total silence as the crowed experienced disbelief over what they had just seen. Then they roared in surprise and, in the case of most of them, in delight. Britney Spears had knocked down Mike Tyson with both of her hands tied behind her back! Britney stood proudly, cigarette still in her mouth, and puffed casually as the referee started the count. Tyson crawled to his corner and by the count of six had climbed up the rope, off of the floor. Britney strolled over to Tyson's corner. As he was heaving for air, Britney took one long last drag of her cigarette, and then dropped it from her lips into Tyson's open, gasping mouth! Tyson gagged in pain and surprise, and Britney's cigarette butt burned the inside of his mouth before he managed to spit it out. Britney turned away from Tyson and blew a long stream of smoke into the air. The noise in the arena was so loud that it felt as if the building was shaking. Tyson was bracing himself against the ropes and the post in his corner. Britney stood with his back to him, just a couple of feet away. The former champ was seething. Not only was the blonde brat beating him up, she was showing him up too, in the most humiliating way. But now, Tyson saw his chance. Britney, hands still tied behind her back of course, was soaking in the cheers of the crowd, proud of her achievements so far. To Tyson, it looked as if she wasn't even paying attention to him. He knew that if he used the ropes in his corner for support, he could bring his foot forward hard, right in her back, and it would flatten her. Tyson gathered up his strength one more time. He was going to show this girl not to mess with Iron Mike! Tyson coiled back and struck his leg out at Britney's back. Although she had been looking straight ahead of her and Tyson was behind her, Britney was watching all of Tyson's moves on one of the large screens in the arena. She knew what he was going to do. In fact this was exactly what Britney had been waiting for. And she had successfully coaxed Tyson into doing it. Britney bent slightly to her right, so instead of Tyson's foot slamming into her back, went through the triangle formed by Britney's bent elbow and her back. Quickly, she snapped her elbow back, her strong forearm trapping Tyson's foot! Tyson realized what had happened, but it was too late. He had been tricked into kicking Britney! He was caught, and it hadn't even worked! Tyson knew that in order to keep this fight strictly a boxing match, and not have to worry about Britney's kicks, all he had to do was refrain from kicking her first. But Britney had outsmarted him, and goaded him into the kicks! And now his foot was trapped between Britney's forearm and her torso. In this position, Britney strolled towards the center of the ring, dragging Tyson with him. He tried in vain to grab on to the ropes, but Britney had his ankle secured tightly against her body, and he slumped down. It seemed effortless for Britney to move and carry all of Tyson's extra weight. She was, literally, "wiping the floor" with him! One would think that having her hands tied behind her would restrict her movements, and it did, but it also provided her support so that she could drag him along. Britney motioned for the referee to come to her. As the referee approached Britney, the bell rang, ending the round. But Britney still held on to Tyson, who was dangling at an awkward angle, nearly upside down. Britney said a few words into the referee's ear. He looked down at Tyson, then at Tyson's foot as it was being held by Britney, looked at Britney again, and nodded. He briefly conferred with the judges, and they also nodded. He then motioned for the microphone to be lowered so that he could make an announcement. "LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, BY THE RULES GOVERNING THIS FIGHT, AND BY VIRTUE OF THE OBVIOUS FACT THAT MR. TYSON HAS ATTEMPTED TO KICK MS. SPEARS, I HEREBY DECLARE THIS FIGHT TO NOW BE A KICKBOXING MATCH!" Britney smilingly nodded her approval at the referee's words. She moved her elbow, relaxing her grip on Tyson's leg, causing him to crash to the floor with a thud. Britney Shook her long hair as she cockily strode back to her corner. She had an athletic sheen of perspiration on her by this point, which only accentuated her sensuality, but it could be accurately said that she was barely working up a sweat. Tyson crawled to his corner and pulled himself up to his feet. In most cases, a fight in which one of the boxers had been beaten so badly would have been stopped by this point. But the referee and the judges knew what side their bread was buttered on. And they didn't even want to think of the price that they would have to pay for doing anything that displeased Britney. At a whim, Britney could do harm to their city and state, not to mention their own personal careers. And Britney clearly wanted the fight to continue, and to continue as a kickboxing match, so it did. Britney fought the 7th round, the first kickboxing round, as it turned out, with her arms still tied behind her. The round began with Britney dancing, her legs swinging wildly, around the ring. Tyson struggled to get up from his chair. As he finally got to his feet, Britney, now back in her corner, ran across the ring at Tyson, leaping in the air from the middle of the ring, flying at blinding speed, feet first, towards her opponent. Nearly simultaneously, her left foot banged his chest, and her right foot connected with his chin, snapping his head back. Britney quickly bent her legs, landing cleanly in a crouch right in front of where Tyson was crumpling to the floor. Britney stood and smiled down at Tyson as he struggled to pick himself up. But as soon as he did, Britney swept her leg around, banging into Tyson's lower calves, sending him back to the ground. The arena was rocking as loudly as ever. Three more times, Britney let Tyson get to his feet, only to swing one of her legs around, effortlessly, to put him back on the ground. Getting bored with this, Britney wanted to get on with the next part of the public punishment that she had dreamed of for years, way before the thought of an opportunity was a realistic notion. She kicked his barely conscious body to his stomach. Britney stepped between Tyson's prone legs, nudging them apart as she bent down to whisper in his ear: "This one is for the way you treated your first wife Robin!" She then straightened up, took a few steps back, and with a running start kicked Tyson just above the rear of his protective cup, the tip of her sneaker banging into the top of the underside of Tyson's testicles. Tyson screamed in agony, his body jumping forward about a foot, more out of reflex than strength. This was the result of the epiphany that Britney had the first time she practiced with the "Tyson Dummy" lying in the same position that the real Tyson was in now. It was that although wearing a protective cup will protect a man's groin from frontal attacks the area,it would still leave him vulnerable from the rear. And she had heard that the underside of a man's balls were even more sensitive back there than from in the front! The only obstacle to Britney was that he had to kick first in order make it legal for her to kick as well. But of course, that obstacle was now removed. Britney again stepped between Tyson's legs. They were still flailing, so Britney pivoted on her heels and placed the soles of her sneakers on his calves, pinning them to the ground as she bent over to whisper to him again. "And this is for the girl that you raped and went to jail for!" The State of Indiana had incarcerated Tyson for this crime years before, but Britney now imposed her own punishment on him for that horrible act. Her next leaping kick landed in precisely the same spot as the first. Tyson again involuntarily moved forward as he groaned in pain. "And this," Tyson heard Britney say through the fog in his brain, "is for the woman that you beat up when you were a kid, and robbed of her money when pretending to help her with her groceries! I read that was why you were sent to jail the first time!" A third, excruciating kick followed. Tyson moved only a few inches this time, though the pain was worse than ever. "And now", cooed Britney into Tyson's ear, "I'm going to punish you for all those other women that I'm sure that you have abused in the past but that has never become public knowledge!" Britney moved further back this time than with her previous kicks. Instead of kicking him she flew through the air, landing with the long, narrow, hard rubber stiletto heels landing in the exact same spot as the kicks. The scream that Tyson let out could only be described as "bloodcurdling". The thought went through the minds of the referee and the judges that Britney was breaking what are generally accepted rules of kickboxing. But all of them knew the reality: "Britney rules, therefore Britney MAKES the rules". Therefore, none of them took any action to stop Britney from bashing Tyson's balls, and no one would take any action afterwards. There was still 30 seconds left in the round, but Britney simply strolled over to her corner and leant casually on the ropes, watching as Tyson rolled on the floor in agony, barely, but nonetheless, conscious. He made his way back to his corner as Britney stretched her legs, rocking back and forth as she watched Tyson struggle with a proud smile on her face. She made no more attempts to attack him. There was no question that she had clearly won the round! With her arms still trussed behind her, Britney got up to fight the 8th round. But Tyson's doctor was still hovering over him. She strode purposefully over to the doctor. "BACK OFF, DOC"! she snapped. The doctor, who like many of his profession had come to consider himself as powerful as the deity, wasn't accustomed to being talked to like that. He was especially taken aback by this blonde youngster . "I'm not gonna kill him or anything, Doc." Britney said, a little conciliatory but still firm. Remember, I'm gonna OWN him after this fight. It's in the contract. It's what - what were those big words my lawyer used? Oh yeah - an 'irrevocable, ironclad binding provision of compulsory indentured servitude'. I want to have fun with him, and make some money off of him too, for a long time to come, so I'm not going to hurt him so badly that he won't be able to function for my pleasure and profit." The doctor shrugged his shoulders. He, too, knew that he was powerless to stop Britney from doing whatever she wanted. Tyson was still sitting on his bench, with Britney facing him. Planting her right leg firmly on the canvass floor, she slowly put the toe of her left sneaker under his chin, and firmly pushed it upwards. In order for the rest of his body to follow the head, Tyson struggled mightily to hoist himself up to his feet. Once Tyson was standing up, Britney motioned for the volume of the music, with the heavy rythmatic beat. Keeping in time with the music, Britney anchored the stiletto heel of her left sneaker at the top of Tyson's breast bone, and moving it from side to side, softly batted Tyson's face, first in one direction and then the other, with both sides of her foot. These weren't hard kicks, and though they hurt Tyson because they banged into his earlier wounds, they weren't particularly hard kicks, and weren't that physically painful. But the humiliation that she was dishing out on him was devastating to his ego, pride and masculinity. She was "bitch-slapping" him with her foot, with her hands tied behind her, in front of the entire world! Britney continued the slapping until the end of the round. When the bell rang, Britney abruptly stopped, spun around on her right heel and skipped back to her corner, leaving Tyson to slump down. His corner people barely had time to put his stool down under him, unless he would have fallen to the floor. At the start of the 9th round, Britney, her hands yet still tied behind her, skipped back to Tyson, smiling at him as she stood a foot in front of him, waiting for him to stand up. She had deprived him of nearly all of his strength, but his humiliation gave him enough energy to get back on his feet. Britney lifted her right leg up. She placed her foot on Tyson's neck, the long heel of her sneaker against the left side of Tyson's neck, and the sole of the shoe curving around the other side of his neck, holding him securely in place despite his trembling legs. Without warning, and while keeping her hold on Tyson's throat with her right foot, Britney whipped her left foot into Tyson's gut. Her legs were so athletic that she was able to easily land back on her left foot while maintaining her hold with her right. As the audience roared, the beaming Britney, even from her position, was able to bow gracefully. Then, she flashed her left foot back up, this time smashing Tyson's already battered nose. In a rapid move that would be the envy of any athlete, Britney brought her right leg down, and her left leg up, taking the right foot's place in holding Tyson in place. She then repeatedly battered the entirety of Tyson's swollen tattoo area around his left eye. Everyone watching was amazed that she could maintain such balance and control and be so accurate with her kicks, and to be able to repeatedly land so easily back on the floor after each one of them. Britney knew that she had now completely depleted Tyson of spirit as well as strength. If she released her hold on his neck now, he would fall right down and not be able to get up. She would win by a knockout. But it was too early for Britney's taste. It was only the 9th round of a 10 round fight, and Britney wanted to prolong her fun. Besides, she had plans for a Grand Finale. So she continued to bang away at Tyson's tattoo until the round ended. The split screen that everyone was watching between rounds told the whole story. On one side was a man with a battered, bloody, defeated head, his eyes showing both defeat and embarrassment. On the other side of the screen showed a supremely confident, woman, with a look of pride in her smile that bordered on haughtiness. Unlike Tyson, Britney didn't have a scratch or a cut or a bump on her. Every strand of her lush, long blonde hair was bouncing perfectly in place. This time, after fighting one round with one hand behind her back and the next four with both hands secured, she told her trainer to cut her bonds loose. To the delight of the crowd, Britney spent the rest of the time before the 10th round shadow boxing with her now freed hands. For the first time in the fight, she would be using both her arms AND her legs! Tyson didn't want to come out for round ten, but when the bell rang, his corner people pushed him out into the ring. They had their own careers to think about. They were working for Tyson, and knew that they were on the losing side. If Britney wanted to ruin their careers and make sure that they never worked in boxing again, they knew that she had the power to do it. So now, even Tyson's own people attempted to curry favor with Britney! Britney used her newly liberated fists to pound Tyson backwards, until he was back up against the ropes. She draped each of his arms over the top of the rope so that he wouldn't fall to the canvass until she was good and ready for him to do so. After taking a few steps back, Britney ran up to where Tyson was hanging, and delivered a blinding fusillade of punches and kicks, all over his body, from his head to his shins. The onslaught was so fast and powerful that it can only be compared to the end of a fireworks show, when instead of sending up a few missiles at a time, they shoot the works, causing explosions and colorful lights in the sky. Indeed, Britney was "shooting the works" on Tyson's body. Looking at the clock, Britney saw that she had less than two minutes left in the final round. She banged her fist into Tyson's left arm, and kicked his right, dislodging them from the ropes. She stepped to the side and stuck her leg out, controlling his fall, making sure that he ended up on his hands and knees. As the crowd gasped, Britney bent down, whispered something into Tyson's ear, and then sat on his back. She kicked his flanks with the backs of her shoes, and he started moving, on her hands and knees, all around the ring, with Britney astride him, providing encouraging kicks whenever he slowed down. None of this was allowed in any rule book, but once again, no one was going to stop Britney from doing whatever she pleased. It was almost miraculous that Tyson was able to stay on his hands and knees, but he did, until Britney had gotten him positioned in the ring exactly where she wanted him. She then dismounted his back, walked in front of him and bent down. Smiling at Tyson, she leaning on her feet and he on his hands and knees, Britney then put her fists together. She swung them down between her legs, and then moved them forward as she stood up, her pink gloves delivering a devastating double-uppercut to the bottom of Tyson's chin. The sheer power of Britney's Blow brought Tyson to his feet as well. The difference was that while Britney was able to stop, and stand in an upright position, Tyson's backward momentum continued until he fell on to his back, his head thudding onto the canvass. He landed in the middle of the ring. Britney had knocked Tyson out cold, exactly when she wanted to, and not a moment before. As the referee counted from "One to Ten" with the crowd howling louder than ever, Brittney did a little backwards strutting dance, similar to what she had seen Drew Barrymore do in the first "Charlie's Angels" movie. Britney looked at the clock. There were fifteen seconds left. With five seconds to spare, Britney had won in a knockout! When the referee got to "Ten", Britney stepped between Tyson's legs, and in a conquering pose more fitting on a field of battle than a boxing ring, put her right foot on Tyson while raising her arms in victory, as her fans roared. The referee reached to hold her hand up, preparing to declare her the winner. "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN", the referee started to announce, before Britney stopped him. "Wait a moment, Ref!" she said. "I want him to be awake to hear you say it!" Britney lifted her leg off of Tyson's chest and positioned it so that the hard rubber stiletto heel of her shoe was positioned directly over his belly button. She slowly raised her leg till her knee pointed upwards. Everyone in the world watching via satellite, everyone watching in the arena, knew what Britney was about to do. Everyone, that is, except Tyson, who remained unconscious at Britney's feet. Tyson quickly regained consciousness as Britney pounded her heel into his navel. He squealed like a stuck pig and reflexively raised his arms and his legs before crashing back down and rejoining his back on the canvass floor. He couldn't move, but he was awake enough to understand what was happening. (Of all the photographs taken of the fight, this one got the most play. There are two daily tabloid newspapers in New York, and they always try to outdo each other in coming up with the most clever headline. In this case, both papers ran the same photo, and the exact same headline on the following day: "BRITNEY SPEARS TYSON". If there was anyone that was humiliated nearly as much as Tyson, it was these two headline writers, whose colleagues sarcastically congratulated them them on their creativity and originality. Clearly, neither of them would win a Pulitzer Journalism Prize for this headline.) While Britney kept her foot on Tyson's belly button and the sole of her shoe rested on his protective cup, she nodded to the referee, giving him permission to, as she put it "start from the top". The referee cleared his throat. "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WINNER BY A KNOCKOUT IN THE TENTH ROUND, THE NEW ASSOCIATION CHAMPION, BRITNEEEEEEEEY SPEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAARS!" The crowd was now at its noisiest. Most prominently heard were the thousands of teenaged girls who were screaming at the victory of their idol over the former world champ. The officials brought in the silver-plated championship belt. But Britney told them to stop. She spoke into the microphone. "I think that it's only fitting that the former champ put the belt on me!" more roars of approval came from the crowd. Britney removed the foot that was pinning Tyson down, and told him to get to his knees. She then turned to Tyson's corner men and told them to remove Tyson's boxing gloves. Eager by this point to please Britney, they rushed to do what she had commanded. She told them to put the gloves on the floor. When they did, Britney kicked first one glove, and then the other, into the audience. Two lucky and happy people in the crowd had just received a souvenir of the event! Prancing back to Tyson, Britney placed herself with her back to his kneeling form. She spoke a few words to him, and, looking more ashamed than ever, buckled the championship belt around Britney. Britney told Tyson to stay on his hands and knees in the center of the ring while she walked around its inside perimeter, fists in the air, bright smile beaming, accepting the wild cheers from the crowd, who alternated between watching her directly or looking at the huge close-up of her victory walk on the giant television screens. She then returned to where Tyson was kneeling and stood in front of him. Tyson's head slumped in further shame when Britney gave him his next instructions. But all she had to do was to put her fists right in front of his face. First, he kissed Britney's pink boxing gloves, the gloves that had caused him so much pain, the gloves that were splattered with his own blood. Then he removed each glove and handed them to Britney. She then threw each one, in different directions, into the crowd. Another two fortunate people got a valuable collector's item! Britney then asked one of her aides to bring her the long, pink, feathered boa that she had worn into the ring. Once she had it, she suddenly kneed Tyson under his chin, sending him to his back. Britney quickly spun around and jumped, landing knees first on Tyson's belly, nearly knocking the wind out of him. Her legs straddled the length of his torso, and all he could see was Britney's beautiful butt directly in front of him. But he could feel Britney reaching under his shorts and protective cup, and tying one end of the boa around his balls. The crowd could see that Britney was doing something with the boa underneath Tyson's trunks, but they weren't sure exactly what. Using Tyson's heaving chest for leverage, Britney vaulted herself off of his body and back into a standing position in front of him. She bent down and pulled off his right sneaker. Britney stood back up, twirled the shoe around by its laces for a few seconds before flinging it into the crowd. She repeated this process with his left shoe. As the crowd gasped with anticipation, Britney reached down and with a deft move, grabbed Tyson's black boxing trunks by the crotch area and stood back up, taking the trunks with her. The audience screamed for her to throw it to them, but instead, she tucked Tyson's shorts inside the strings of her pink bikini bottom. Britney was keeping it as a souvenir for herself! Bending down again, Britney pulled off Tyson's only remaining garments, his athletic supporter and protective cup. All he was now "wearing" was Britney's boa, which the audience could now see was bound in a series of pink knots tied around his penis and balls. Britney stood back up, Tyson's cup and supporter in one hand, and the boa in the other. Instead of verbally instructing Tyson on what to do next, she simply pulled up on the boa. With great effort, Tyson got to his knees. When Britney kept on pulling, Tyson painfully struggled to his feet. Without his shoes, and with Britney still wearing hers, she looked even taller than Tyson than she had before! Since he was a kid, Mike Tyson had been a bully. And as Heavyweight Champ, it could be said that he was at one time the biggest bully in the world. But now, a girl, a bratty blonde youngster just three years out of her teens, banged her chest against his, causing him to stumble backwards. She was showing how superior her firm, athletic body was to his as she continued to push his body back with her own, and he could do nothing to stop her. She kept pushing until his back hit against the ropes. Britney whispered in Tyson's ear for him to lift his head as high as he could. Tyson had been bowing his head to hide his humiliation, and he hesitated when Britney gave her command. Britney was hoping that the shame of it all would cause him to hesitate, and he did. This gave her the opportunity to realize another one of her long-held fantasies: With a swift move of her right leg upward, she kneed Tyson in the balls. The feather boa that was tied around them offered little protection, and Tyson groaned. Britney cocked her leg as if she was about to strike again, and this time, Tyson frantically held his battered head up high. Britney dropped the boa and used the now free hand to push Tyson's head even higher. She then took the protective cup, which she held in her other hand, and secured it underneath his head by pushing the bottom of the cup into the base of his throat, just on top of his sternum bone. She then pushed the top of the cup so that the sides and top wedged tightly underneath his chin. She then tightly tied the cup in place with Tyson's athletic supporter, the hard knot behind his head. Britney took a moment to step back and proudly inspect her work. She had immobilized Tyson's head in a position where he had to look straight ahead, with his defeated face involuntarily held upwards for all to see. The hard rubber cup kept his head from moving down, and the top and sides of the cup bit into the very sensitive hollows below his jaw bones and his throat, making any attempt by him to move his head to the side excruciatingly, painfully impossible. Once Tyson realized this, tears ran down his face, despite his efforts to stop them On the giant screens, the tears looked like Niagara Falls. This gave Britney an added bonus: With the whole world watching, she was making Tyson cry! Britney held the boa in her left hand. She tugged at it a couple of times while intently watching Tyson's groin area, to see how well her knots were working. She couldn't have been more pleased. When she pulled, the knots would tighten around his balls, causing immense pain. But when she eased her grip, the soft, flexible feathers of which the boa was made caused the knots to slightly loosen. But as soon as she pulled again, the knots tightened back up, his balls painfully pressed against each other, knots biting into them from all directions. Once she was satisfied with what she saw, Britney spun around on her heels until Tyson faced her back. Tyson was now of course completely barefoot and naked, save for the pink boa tied around his groin. Britney sexily draped the boa over her shoulder and turned her head to look back at Tyson. She wrapped her end of the boa around her left hand, measuring it so that she would be holding it at the point where he would be three feet behind her when the boa was held tightly between them, an inch or two more than that when Britney would slacken her hold. The music that now started to play was one of Britney's greatest hits: "Oops I Did It Again". Britney put up her hand towards the control room, telling them to stop. She then spoke into the microphone. "That song would be more appropriate if we ever had a rematch! Next time, maybe we'll do what we call in Louisiana "old fashioned rasslin!" This thrilled the crowd to no end, who were excited at the prospect. Britney was excited at the prospect of a rematch, too. When all was said and done, after the gate, the pay-per-view money, and owning the rights to what became the biggest selling video ever, and getting a piece of the action every time it was downloaded online, along with the money she made on the side by betting on herself and taking the bookies to the cleaners, Britney would make nearly a BILLION dollars on the fight! And with her awesome legs, Britney knew that this would be one of her greatest assets if she were to face Tyson if she were to face him in a Southern style "old fashioned rasslin" match! The ropes on one side of the ring had been disconnected so that that Britney and Tyson could exit more easily. Britney looked forward and strutted off of the ring and down the aisle of the arena that led to her dressing room, security guards clearing her path through the cheering audience. Britney was enjoying this and took her time, though she enjoyed stepping up the pace every now and then, causing the knots to tighten. She turned around and laughed as she watched the surprised Tyson realize that she was walking faster, and that he had to quicken his pace as well or the knots would once again do their damage. But even when she slowed down her strut, Britney still made it as painful as she could for Tyson. Every few seconds, she flicked her wrist with her left hand, tightening the knots as she waved with her right hand to her adoring, screaming fans. The flicking of Britney's wrist was barely perceptible, but its effects were not. Every time she pulled the boa tighter, it stretched out in a straight line, which was followed a second later by a whimpering moan emanating from Tyson as the knots created repeated agony. But what suddenly seemed the most poignant summation of what had happened in the course of the previous hour were the words emblazoned on Britney's pink boa. The words were clearly visible whenever Britney tightened her grip, causing the boa to straighten out. When she had first come into the ring wearing the boa, no one had thought much about the words. But now, they realized Britney's true intended purpose of the words. The crowd in the arena and viewers around the world knew that, as much as to the boa itself, the words pertained to the penis and balls to which it were trussed, and to the man attached to the bound groin, Mike Tyson. The words read: "PROPERTY OF BRITNEY SPEARS".