Judo Jane Tames A Scumbag 
A Poem by Lady Luck

As Jane was walking home one night, after judo class
A man jumped out in front of her and tried to make a pass
She told him she was flattered but politely she declined
But as she walked on past him, he grabbed her from behind
He put his arm across her throat to drag her to the ground
He shouted, "Get your knickers off and don't make a fucking sound!"
Jane remained unflustered, confident and calm
She knew that soon she'd get her chance and then she'd break his arm
She asked him to release his grip so that she could obey
And as he did so she just smiled, it was time to make him pay
She smashed her forearm in his face, then her elbow in his gut
And then she threw him judo style and began to kick his butt
She pulled him up then dropped him with a stunning karate kick
He was crawling on his hands and knees and feeling rather sick
She grabbed his arm and twisted it and pushed his nose right to the floor
"Now what the hell gives you the right to treat me like a whore?
You're pathetic, you are nothing, just a piece of male shit
As far as human beings go, you're the bottom of the pit
Because I am a woman doesn't mean that I am weak
Don't believe that you are stronger just because of your physique
For you're the one who's eating dirt and I'm the one on top
And now I'm going to break your arm, unless you beg me 'stop'"
And so he begged and she let him up and he stood there on the spot
She laughed and said, "Now drop your pants and show me what you've got.
Come on," she shouted, "Get them off and don't make a fucking sound!
Not nice is it being threatened? Now turn yourself around"
As his pants slipped to his feet, she took his belt of leather
And then she wound it round his wrists and tied his hands together
"What are you going to do to me? No more please, I beg"
"You've wet yourself, you dirty man, it's rolling down your leg"
She walked up close and grabbed his balls and squeezed them really tight 
"I'm going to make you pay for what you tried to do tonight
I won't let go until your balls are raw and start to ache
You tried to abuse a woman, and that was your mistake."
"I'm sorry, I'm just a scumbag, a worthless, gutless male
I concede that I'm inferior to the conquering female
I'll never be abusive or disrespect a woman again
For I know now that women are superior to men"
With that Jane smiled and released her grip, another convert made 
Another man now understood, another debt was paid

Lady Luck