Jessica and Joe by Bigbomber Joe walked up the steps and knocked on the door. The music was very loud so nobody heard him knock. He opened the door and walked in. . The house was crowded with teenagers. Some were dancing in the living room. Others were talking and others were drinking and some were talking and drinking. Joe went over to the table where the liquor was and poured himself a shot of cognac. He saw his friend Jessica sitting on the couch. She was a short, stocky Asian girl with very thick legs and long black hair. Her build contrasted sharply with Joe’s. Joe was a skinny 10th grader at 5’9", 110 lbs. At 4’6", 125 lbs she was 15 inches shorter than Joe but 15 lbs heavier. She was wearing blue shorts and a blue t-shirt. Joe had been friends with Jessica since kindergarten. It had never been anything more than that. Joe didn’t know why. Jessica was quite attractive in an exotic way. But he had never felt inclined to attempt to become anything more that friends with her. Of course, Jessica never showed any interest in him, either. But he wasn’t sure if it would have made a difference if she had. He walked over and sat down next to her. "Hi Joe." Said Jessica. "Hi Jessica." Said Joe. "What did you think of the math test yesterday?" "It was easy." "Yeah. I thought so too." "Did you hear the Russians selected a new General Secretary?" "Yeah. Constantine Chernenko." "Do you think he’ll try to restore detente?" "Who knows? "Do you think there will be a nuclear war?" "No." "Why not?" "I don’t know. When push comes to shove, I just don’t think either the President or the General Secretary is going to be willing to push the button. Remember when the Russians shot down KAL flight 007 last summer? I was afraid there was going to be a nuclear war." "I remember." "But then my dad told me there wasn’t going to be one and I felt better. Boy was he mad at the Russians, though." "You’re parents are Korean." "Right." "I’m going to get another drink. You want one?" "Yeah. Get me a Bailey’s Irish Cream." Joe got up, went to the table where the liquor was, poured another shot of cognac for himself and a shot of Bailey’s for Jessica, went back to the couch, handed Jessica the Bailey’s and sat down. Jessica drank her Bailey’s in a single gulp. "You’re supposed to savor it." "I prefer to gulp." "Whatever. How long after your parents immigrated to the United States were you born?" "Like two years. They immigrated in ‘66 and I was born in ‘68. My sister was born in Korea." "So you can be President but she can’t." "Yup. So what is your ethnic background?" "My mom’s Irish and my dad’s Dutch." "There are more people of Irish descent than any other ancestry except German. More than half of the population of the United States is German, Irish and English." "I’m going to get another drink. You want another one?" "No." Joe got up, poured himself another shot of cognac, came back and sat down. "You’re gonna get bombed." Said Jessica. "Wouldn’t be the first time." "I can calculate how many drinks it’ll take for you to get bombed. It takes 5 drinks for an average sized man to get a .10 blood alcohol level. So that’s .02 per drink. Let’s say an average sized man weighs 170 lbs. How much do you weigh?" "I’m embarrassed to say." "I won’t tell anybody." "110." Jessica started punching numbers into her calculator watch. "It’ll take 3.2352941 drinks to give you a .10 BAL. Now the question is, would it take more drinks for me to get bombed or for you to get bombed? I weigh 125, but girls metabolize alcohol more slowly than guys." "We could have a drinking contest and see who passes out first." "Nah. I don’t want to get bombed." "I’m going to get another drink." "That’ll be your third. Three drinks will give you a BAL of ...." Jessica punched some numbers into her calculator watch. ".0927272." Jessica and Joe talked for two more hours, during which time Joe had 8 more shots of cognac for a total of 11. He passed out. Jessica walked over to Brad, the host of the party. Brad was a 6’ tall, 250 lb lineman on the varsity football team. "Brad, I need your help." "What’s up, Jessica?" "Joe passed out drunk. Will you put him on my shoulders so I can carry him to my house?" "Why not just call his parents?" "It’s late. I don’t want to wake them." "I’ll carry him to your house for you if you want." "No. That’s Ok. I can do it." Jessica and Brad walked over to where Joe was. Jessica put her hand on the couch for balance and bent her knees so her upper leg was perpendicular to her lower leg. Brad picked Joe up and put him on her shoulders. Jessica stood up straight as if Joe weighed nothing at all. "You’re a strong girl, Jessica." Said Brad, impressed. Jessica’s house was up a slight incline from Brad’s. But she carried Joe there with no trouble at all. She wasn’t even breathing heavy when she got there. There was a spare bedroom in her house in she put Joe down on the bed in it. Jessica had had a crush on Joe for as long as she had known him. But she had never told him or even given the slightest indication of how she felt. She would have if Joe had given her any indication that he was attracted to her, but he never had. Joe woke up feeling as if somebody had dropped a two-ton safe on his head. Suddenly, Jessica walked in the room wearing nothing but a pair of panties and a tank top. Her legs were enormous! Not fat, but muscular. He had never been attracted to muscular girls before, but her legs were amazing! He suddenly found himself with a major hard-on. He was seeing Jessica in a whole new light, the light of panties. "Good morning." Said Jessica. "Good morning." Said Joe, suddenly realizing that he had been staring. He looked around and realized where he was. "I’m in your house." He said. "How did I get here?" "I carried you." "You carried me from Brad’s house?" "It was only a block." "I never knew you were so strong." Joe ate breakfast at Jessica’s house and went home. He couldn’t stop thinking about Jessica’s legs, and how strong she had to be to carry him all the way to her house from Brad’s, which was up a hill. Then he got to wondering whether he could carry her to her house from Brad’s. Jessica outweighed him by 15 lbs. And her legs appeared to be twice as thick as his. But, he was a guy. And guys were stronger than girls. Weren’t they? Jessica was delighted. She had seen Joe staring at her legs and had seen his hard-on when he got out of the bed. He was finally noticing her in the way she had always wanted him to. She wished he had seen her in her underwear long ago. Most guys didn’t find her attractive. She wondered if it was partly because she was thicker than most of them, especially in the legs. Maybe they were embarrassed. But there was a small number of guys who found her exotic and unusual appearance very attractive. The phone rang. She picked it up. "Hello?" Said Jessica. "Jessica." Said Joe. "I’ve been thinking about you carrying me to your house and I want to see if I can carry you to your house." Joe was a stick. His legs were like toothpicks. Jessica didn’t think he could do it and didn’t want him to be humiliated, especially now that he was showing interest in her. It might discourage him from initiating a romantic relationship. She decide to try to discourage him. "I don’t know, Joe." She said. "I weigh quite a bit. You might hurt yourself." "You carried me." "I’m 15 lbs heavier than you are." "I want to try it anyway." "Ok." Jessica and Joe met at Brad’s house the next day. "Show me how you lifted me and carried me." Said Joe. "I bent my knees like this and Brad put you on my shoulders." Said Jessica, bending her knees as she said it. "Brad, put Jessica on my shoulders." Said Joe, bending his knees like Jessica had. Brad picked up Jessica. "You’re heavier than Joe, Jessica." Said Brad. Then he put her on Joe’s shoulders. As soon as he did it, Joe’s knees buckled and he and Jessica fell to the ground in a heap. "Dammit! Dammit! Dammit!" Said Joe, tears already welling up in his eyes. He sat down on Brad’s front steps and started to cry. Jessica was afraid of this. She sat down next to him. "Joe, I told you. I’m 15 lbs heavier than you are." "That’s half of what I’m upset about! Look at me. I’m a thread. You’re 15 inches shorter than I am and 15 lbs heavier. Look at the difference between our legs. No wonder you can lift me but I can’t lift you." "Joe, I’m a particularly stocky girl. Not only that, but girls, especially Asian girls, are closer to physical maturity at this age than guys. Asian girls are physically mature at 15 in terms of body weight and muscular strength. You’re comparing yourself to an adult." "You’ve been twice as thick as me for as long as I’ve known you. I remember when we weighed ourselves in the bathroom in 6th grade. Even then I towered over you and even then you outweighed me." "But now you’ve got testosterone working for you." She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him hard on the lips. He kissed her back.