BATTY BASEBALL
(c) 1978 by Tim Hollis

It was the day of the biggest game in baseball, the Weird World Series!  A 
huge crowd was gathered at the stadium to watch the Krinklesnyde Krumples 
play against the Weird World Weirdos.

Muscles Mahogany was the star player for the Weirdos, so she was the first 
one at bat for the game.  Pitching for the Krumples was that old villain, 
Springtail the Pig.  Unknown to  Mahogany, the villains' team had replaced 
the regular baseballs with some of Krinklesnyde's own inventions, Boomerang 
Baseballs.

Springtail the Pig hurled the ball in Mahogany's direction, and she had no 
trouble in giving it a terrific SMACK with her bat.  But the Boomerang 
Baseball sailed into the air, made a U-turn, and zoomed right back to 
Mahogany, hitting her on the head and knocking her out cold.  "Yer OUT!" 
yelled Larry Loudmouth, the rabbit umpire.

Next, it was the Krumples' turn at bat.  They sent in that rotten old 
gangster Snap         Alligator, who waved his baseball bat menacingly.  
Muscles Mahogany was also the pitcher for the Weird World Weirdos, but that 
still didn't stop the villains from cheating.

They had gotten rid of the Boomerang Baseballs, and replaced them with 
regular   baseballs that had large pieces of metal stuck into them.  Snap 
Alligator's bat contained a small magnet,  and when Mahogany threw her best 
pitch, the metal-lined baseball flew directly to Snap's bat!

"This is terrible!" Tim Hangschwartz, the Weirdos' manager, said to Mighty 
Milkshake.  "If the Krumples get one more hit, we're dead ducks!"

Just then, there was another sickening CRACK of the bat.

"Quack, quack," said Mighty as yet another baseball soared past their heads.

Just then, Muscles Mahogany ran up, dragging Turk the Blue Turkey by the 
wing.  "Hey, manager, Turk has found something out!" she yelled.

"Yes," reported Turk, "I found out that the Krumples have been cheating 
during every   inning!"

"Why those dirty..." began Hangschwartz, as Mighty reached for one of his 
strength-giving Magic Milkshakes.

"Hold on there!" said Mahogany.  "I'm the one they've been playing around 
with, so I'm the one who's going to fix them!"  Pulling out a handful of her 
super vitamin pills, she gulped them down and was immediately transformed 
into the greatest baseball player in Weird World history!

Dashing to the plate, Mahogany snatched up six baseball bats at one time.  
"PLAY BALL!" she bellowed at Springtail, who was still the Krumples' pitcher.

"Oh, yeah?!" he shouted, throwing TEN baseballs in the general direction of 
Mahogany's head.  But her powerful swing with the six bats hit every one of 
the baseballs, sending them rocketing back toward the villains like ten small 
guided missles.

The baseballs hit the villain team... Krinklesnyde, Springtail, Snap 
Alligator, Baron Bluejay, and the rest... and knocked them right into the box 
where the baseball bats were stored.  There the old meanies lay, stacked up 
like a pile of bats!

So, Muscles Mahogany was the hero of the game, and the villains had learned 
that their cheating hadn't done them one bit of good!

The End